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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 671. page

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Just Came here to Say Everything yall said on this board about women was right.

>Be me
>Working fry cook an hour ago
>Female Manager asks me why she only attracts creeps
>I say idk
>She then consults me on how to get with good guys
>I tell her church
>She says the good guys don't want me, and only guys that are below my sexual market value are interested in me
>I.E where have all the good men gone
>A very wicked smirk comes across my face
>the smirk escalated with such arousal I had to turn around so she wouldn't see
>I didn't think the memes were actually true

I'm not even mad at women, but wew lads yall were right about everything.
8 posts and 4 images submitted.
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As if there were ever a doubt, anon. Consumerist society raises children who expect their lives to play out like movies say they will.

Don't expect decency or mature thought from women raised in most first world countries. They're wired to follow from the get-go and it's rammed into their skull from the time they're little that the hole between their legs makes them the ultimate good.
>>
right about what mate redpill me
>>
>>39287370
Is it weird that I screenshot these redpill posts because Im too retarded to explain this in my own words when the time comes

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Holy fuck I hate having impacted earwax. Can't hear shit. Going to have to either go see a doctor about this or buy some ear wax removal at the drugstore. Anyone else have this problem?
My ears grow earwax like it's pubic hair. It's impossible to care for since it's never ending and it will just eventually impact like it is right now. I can't hear anything out of my right ear, and I've tried even taking a shower.
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39286909
i usually take care of it by using liquid parafine drops. it doesn't clean them that well, but a lot of the earwax does get softened and goes out after a few days
>>
I used to get that shit

What solved it for me was pushing my index finger into my ear hard enough to create suction, then pull it out really fast so that the earwax sticks to your finger. Do this until your ear is cleared up.
I'm not a doctor though so try at your own risk
>>
I had it really bad when I was a kid. My parents took me to get my ears vacuumed out. It felt like taking a huge shit except from my ears.

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Ok anons, let's do an experiment. Everyone ITT will install tinder and swipe right until you run out and the app says you're done for the day. Report back how many matches you get, it doesn't matter if you use your real pic or not. Also, post profiles that pique your attention.
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>>39286904
>having a facebook in the first place to use Tinder
inb4
>I-I JUST USE A THROWAWAY ONE
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>>39286963
You don't need FB for Tinder man, just a phone number or email I think.
>>
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I'll begin posting this girl I found. Yes, I'm a latino monkey.

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>chilling in room playing games
>chad busts down the door and takes your tendies
>tfw
9 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>39286897
chads don't eat tendies
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>>39286929
than what do chads eat anon
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>>39286929
Gotta get that brotein bro

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>20 years old
>Average face
>Finally caved from isolation and hopped on Tinder
>Its been 2 hours and I haven't matched with anyone

One lady propositioned me for sex, but she looked like she had AIDS
13 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Any pictures of her anon? Can cover details just want to see her and your opportunity for getting laid.
I'm also 20 but a virgin. Was wondering how Tinder works.
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>been on tinder for 7 months and got my first match 2 days ago
>no response
>probably fake too
>>
>>39286917
I'm a virgin too.
I can describe her like this.

She used a bunch of filters to conceal how riddled her face was by sun exposure and drug usage. She was 23 years old, and she looked 30, so she was probably lying about how old she was.

She was a white lady, and I look like a Mexican, but that doesn't mean anything when she's shady as fuck.

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I am a chinaman from the year 2089. Ama.
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
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china gets blacked eventually doesn't it?
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Has the white race gone extinct?
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>>39286839
How do you feel owning the US?

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>"...non....anon.... Anon! Wake up! Today is your first day of middle school, you don't want to be late!

You wake up in your old bed, in your childhood bedroom, in your middle-school-aged body.

You are back in your mind from those days as well, you don't remember the future, but deep down you also have this powerful feeling of deja-vu. You'll also sometimes have flashbacks of your more emotional and memorable between then and the far-away futuristic year of 2017. You might have intrusive thoughts about things like "apple" "facebook" "bitcoins" and "president trump". You might have strong impulses to have you do things you never got to do, and strong impulses to not do things you had done.

What do you do different?
14 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>39286790
dont tempt me. what i wouldnt give to be a child again.
>>
Join the track team so I don't get fat and find friends. I used to be good at running.
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>>39286800
In 10 years, you'd give anything to be where you are now. Peace is not an eventual goal, it's a continual state. It's happening now, and you're missing it. It was no different then, anyway.

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I'm a wagecuck. This qt girl at my work always shares funny memes with me that she finds on iFunny. Today she was laughing a lot and showef me these memes a guy sent her about having sex and cumming really fast and characters from Spongebob talking about having sex. I got really mad and told her that I didn't want to hear about other guys having sex, I wanted to have sex and I'm a virgin. She got really offended and told my boss. Am I screwed, bros?
12 posts and 3 images submitted.
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You should get checked for autism

I'm not joking
>>
I don't know if I would have said the same but I definitely would've been thinking about it, I hate normies and non virgins
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>>39286781
>being a wagecuck
This is where you first went wrong, wagie

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Hey, does anyone have any tips on how to have nice dreams or how to dream what you want without it being a lucid dream? Like pre-programming yourself for some dream.
I don't want it to be lucid because I want to believe it for the moment.
A few days ago I had a dream where I kissed Satania on the cheek and caressed her so that was a really nice dream. She had some chocolate cookies and offered some to me but I politely declined since I try to eat healthy (but not doing too well seeing how I recently ate a whole pack of chips, not my fault though, parents bought some for me... well it is my fault since i didn't resist it)
Anyways priority dreams are ones where I interact with girls in a romantic way
Those are very rare but I really like them, it's always a bit sad waking up from one like that
12 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>39286611
I'd imagine genuinely managing a good mood most of the time will help a lot. Maybe not eating before bed. Here's a dream of mine
>back in early high school
>me and friends are walking through one of my friends yard
>it was in a more rural area so the yard was large and no other houses in sight
>stumble upon my dad
>"you know this is a golf course, right? You better go home."
>keep walking
>my dad is following us
>this is a problem because our goal has become go smoke weed
>stumble upon another friends house
>go inside
>from inside the walls are translucent enough to see through like blinds with light shining through
>sitting around anxiously waiting for dad to leave
>look behind me and there's an ancient African trickster God
>he keeps changing me and my friends to clay and back
>we can't smoke with this dude around us either
>anxiously waiting for nigger God to leave hoping he doesn't leave us as clay
It was pretty wacky, dudes
>>
>>39286611
I don't think that's really possible to orient yourself towards. It's a subconscious thing

>>39286849
that's awesome. I wish I had African trickster gods in my dreams.
>>
>>39286956
>that's awesome. I wish I had African trickster gods in my dreams
It was pretty crazy. The best part about dreams is what may have been terrifying in the dream (like the prospect of being forever turned to clay) isn't by the time you wake up. I had a dream that I was really freaked out by this television static entity and I was in sheer terror whenever it turned around.
Here's an unrelated dream
>back in middle school or some shit in this one
>riding my bike around looking for friends to play with
>knocking on all their doors but they all blow me off
>riding my bike back home
>I've got a mp3 player now
>it's made of 3 ceramic plates and only works when they're together
>when put together it's painted to look like a globe
>they don't connect and putting it together is like putting together any other ceramic item broken into 3 pieces minus glue or anything to keep them together
>there's a headphone jack in it
Weird stuff.

How do you deal with stress? I stress out big time during work, or while making life changing decisions, to the point where I'm stuttering, vibrating, drooling garbage. I get so jumpy flies make me scream in anguish if they move too fast. Quick, any advice on how to relax? (fapping not accepted as answer)
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Close your eyes and breathe deeply until you're calm
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>>39286570
Kankerzooi
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>>39286598
I try doing this a lot. It doesn't work. It's as if my mind is vibrating in my skull. When I close my eyes I see the inside of my eyelids move even though it's perfectly dark. Its getting weird..

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Me:
>18
>out of hell school
>3/10 skinnyfat Manlet and look 12
>not a complete aspie but not a normie either
>friendless, gfless, etc
>scared to go outside haven't been out since summer started
I got accepted to a private school but I couldn't do it so now they are making me go to community college or take online clssses and I don't want to take online classes but I can't fit in with normies at cc
>solutions
Suicide, run away, what else please help guys my life is hell.
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39286547
>solutions
How about you either
a. make a habit of going to class and keeping to yourself
b. make yourself a schedule for online courses and stick to it

Everyone who does college has to do the same thing, dude. You're probably not going to "fit in" with anyone in your classes until you start doing degree-specific work/classes, anyway.

Not trying to sound like a guidance counselor or anything, but maybe you should try joining a club if you are interested in making friends with other students.

Dunno. That's what helped me. Hope it helps you.
>>
>asking /r9k/ for help

too late kid, become a trap and take bbc like a good white boiii
>>
>>39286948
>Not trying to sound like a guidance counselor or anything
But you do. Your advice is equivalent to just beeein yourself. Kys.

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Its so kafkaesque right /r9k/?
I mean you get it right?
10 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>39286534
kefka > kafka
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>>39286604
Le ebin edgy clown loool
>>
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that's so kekekeke

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My tinder date told me before she meets me for a drink at a bar that she has to smoke a blunt with her friends
... is this a major red flag because it feels like one.. should I just call it off or ditch her??
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39286458
>has to get blazed and drunk to socialize
don't bother
>>
Jesus man run as fast as you can.
>>
>>39286458
call it off or stand her up, dont give her your fucking time.

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When was the last time you left your house, robots?

>I left this morning to get the mail
>advertisements
>shut the mailbox and returned to my pc
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Left my room for work this morning. Got off at around 12. Came back and been on my computer ever since.
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>>39286453
2 hours ago, I had to take some photos. Been home ever since
>>
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I just lef t the club half an hour ago after a 12 hour shift. Night was busy but the money was worth. Gonna take a 6 hour nap, play some vidya then repeat the proccess again for one more day.

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One day into college and everyone already hooked up and found partners.
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>>39286451
>actually going to post secondary
log the fuck out norman
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>>39286451
people get engaged in high school now and go to the same colleges together
if you haven't found your life partner by 14, you're fucked
>>
What did you do wrong? Teach me to not make your mistake


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