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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6533. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

>ywn eat scrambled eggs just before the official arrive time of voldemort at hogwarts

y life
18 posts and 5 images submitted.
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origin op very
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>>36389615
that guy always disgusted me

am i the only one?
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>>36389056
Hogwarts sounds like normalfag wizard hell
Why must everything be systemized and socialized?
Would much rather be a cave oracle who's high on amanitas 24/7 than some wand priss with a gay animal spirit and a hardon for authority

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my life is just a never ending transition from absolute highs and the deepest lows. I spend literally hours a day in front of mirrors either hating every inch of myself or suddenly deciding I look and feel fantastic beyond rational levels. supplemented by weeks of me working out to try and get out my funk that never ends. IT NEVER ENDS. I CAN NEVER ATTAIN STABILITY AND CLARITY. I AM ALWAYS ABSOLUTELY AND TOTALLY INSANE.
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
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sounds like manic depression desu fampai
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>>36389039
Get rid of the mirrors
I did the same sanity will return
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>>36389213
fuck off schizo

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What is the most and least you've done for pussy?

MOST:
>Bought a girl a $200 necklace for Christmas. She gave me a blowjob and I fucked her for 45 minutes

LEAST:
>Took a girl to Taco Bell for a first date. She also gave me a blowjob and let me play with her thick ass
13 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>most
backrub

>least
just took their pants off, unzipped dick, and put it in ?
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Never had pussy
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>Most
Nothing.

>Least
Told her to come over after she was done working and bring snacks
>fuck her on & off for 6hrs

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>tfw no math bf
14 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>36388914
>tfw no myth bf
>>
>>36388914
Interesting how nothing there is too out of the ordinary, at most the partial derivative, but I couldn't start to understand what it means
>>
>TFW no moth bf

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Don't worry nice guy, your time will come eventually.
6 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>36388871
>"By Anonymous"
>implying that's a genuinely written article
This is how believable it looks to me.
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>>36388918
>things that hurt me aren't real

Mr. Gorbachev - tear down this wall.
>>
>>36389143
I can't feel sorry for him I just can't, he has to learn - sometimes the only way is the hard way.

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>trying to lose weight
I FUCKING WANT SOME PIZZA

RIGHT

FUCKING

NOW
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
26 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36388856
Why not eating diet pizza ?
>>
Stop eating pizza fatso, think of the goal. You'll only hate yourself after you shove that greasy shit down your flabby throat.
>>
the feeling of hunger disappeares after 2 days of no eating.

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Quick question. Who's the queen of /r9k/?
23 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36388793
definitively not that cockroach.
>>
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>its a narccisstic camwhore posts on /r9k/ desiring to be queen episode
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>>36388837
WTF is wrong with (you)? I'm just asking something.

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>grill messages me
>done with "how are yous"
>running out of topics to talk about
>wat do?
43 posts and 8 images submitted.
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It's amazing you got that far. Try again. Maybe you're not that broken.
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>>36388839
what the hell do you mean by 'try again'
>>
just tell her you gotta go start back up tomorrow

What would Jesus think about American roasties if he were alive today?
19 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36388724
He wouldn't care, you're goyim and he only came to salvage Israelites.
>>
They alright
We all alright
We all gonna be ok
Then r9k would crucify him for being a "white knight"
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>>36388724
He was homies with a str8 whore, bud

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"Anon, do you ever feel like we only list Kid A, OK Computer, and In Rainbows as our top three favorite Radiohead albums just because we're supposed to?"
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36388699
Wtf, I don't listen to radiohead.
>>
sorry I don't listen to rym-core
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>>36388699
Nah, I've listened to them all and they definitely stand out as the best. I mean, the Bends have some good moments, but now that I don't even listen to them religiously, those are the only ones I can still listen to occasionally.

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Who else is excited for 420?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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It's my birthday and I'm going to kill myself then. Pretty excited.
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I used to be a huge stoner and was planning on taking off work and doing an epic smoke marathon all day. Then I got an email from this government job I forgot I signed up for last year, and had to get clean immediately.
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>>36388785

Hi adolf

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How is their sex life like?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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hairy
and 20% off
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>>36388647
Really goofy and disgusting.
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>>36388647
I bet she's a big roastie lol

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to all you faggots on this board crying about "tfw no gf" (all of you)
I know for a fact that you all look at porn because this board is very nsfw and you've probably also been looking at porn since 12~ years old
even if you got a gf your dick will not work cuz porn induced ED.
doesn't matter how hot she is, your dick will not work and you will embarrass yourself and she will prob cheat on you and make your negative attitude problem spiral even more out of control.
forget about tfw no gf. you don't want one and they're not worth it.
faggot.
move on and do something with your life.
32 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>36388606
Sorry about your dick OP. Thanks for the insight.
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>move on and do something with your life.
Easier said than done.
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>>36388606
This is not true. Jerking it might be great and porn might top shit but it still doesnt compare to real sex. B8/10

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How do you keep yourself preoccupied when the internet goes down?
13 posts and 2 images submitted.
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with the same things i do when the internet is up, music, animu/mango, and video games
it's worse when there's a power outage since i'll have to hope i have enough battery life
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>>36388623
> it's worse when there's a power outage

ah... the dark times
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>>36388599
Instruments pretty much sometimes just books or sorting the shot I've hoarded up

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>tell stacey sister i stopped looking for a gf because im a geneitically inferior male with no future or stability
>she says thats nonesense and to BEEE URSELF
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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I tell my friends I'll be single forever because I'm genetically inferior.
The fact that actual white people think someone with brown hair, brown eyes, and an olive complexion is white actually pisses me off.
It sucks being a red-pilled non-white because I'm attracted to white people because I know they're perfect, but I don't want any of them to be attracted to me because I know I'm genetically inferior.
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>>36388617
have you ever considered gassing yourself?
I understand why you might be reticent, but you would prevent slipping up and miscegenating.
>>
>>36388617
>Have what you have; brown hair, eyes, olive complexion
>However have completely white ancestory dating back generations
Having no ozone layer will do that, except it bleaches your hair and makes your skin age faster as well as having a mexian appearance lmao. Thats what you get for living in NZ


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