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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 6341. page

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>mother demands to clean my room
>fine by me
>let her in
>dont expect her to clean up under the bed
>she cleans everywhere
>"anon move please, I need to clean under your bed"
>oh shit
>"no its fine, ill do it"
>she doesnt even wait
>just starts cleaning

She found the glove of love. And lubrication.

What do?
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
tell your mom you are human, and have that kind of needs.
Just how fucking fat are your fingers that you need lube to get them into a glove?
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Fucking kek
No lmao, that means I have to discuss it

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>tfw no nazi punk gf to assist me in leading the revolution for the people
12 posts and 2 images submitted.
>assuming she's a "nazi punk" from a picture

how is that whore a nazi?
God , I want to be dominated by her so fucking bad.

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Hi robots?
Did you ever tried to take LSD?
It might help you to kill your social anxiety etc...

Personally it helped me and I recommend it.

I can be the only time that you do it, there no need to take it regularly

And its not even hard to get, just go on the deepweeb with 20$

I could change your life, give it a try
22 posts and 9 images submitted.
I would probably get ripped off and buy regular stamps for 50$
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I feel like it would fuck me up further and I'd get PTSD from a shitty trip or something.
I've tried shrooms, but not LSD. Are they really that different? Because on the shrooms....fuck man, my brain just screamed at me louder than it usually does and the visuals were just tracers on everything that moved. I have estigmatism in my eyes anyway so it was really fucking with me. Ended up having a panic attack and twitching on the ground, ended up curled on the floor for 12 hours, brain screaming, my heart pounding, unable to breath properly. It was one of the worst experiences I've ever had and I haven't touched psychs ever since. I don't want that shit again, life is already awful I don't need to trip out to make it more awful.

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9 posts and 3 images submitted.
enjoy the feels laddie
I woke up next to my gf and had sex this morning she's out buying groceries to make me dinner later. Don't worry it'll get better
>settling down with a fatty

Why do normies always check out everyone from bottom to top when they notice someone?

Isnt this kind of rude and retarded, what are they looking for? Brand of clothes I am wearing or what?

I never ever cared about clothes but I became aware of it till my normie peers started pointing out it doesnt match me or I should look more sleak.

Jesus fucking christ leave me alone with your stupid bullshit.!
31 posts and 3 images submitted.
They're just scoping you out. I do this to anybody I see that looks even kind of attractive.
Dudes I do it so I can kind of gleen what style they have, so I can maybe try and incorporate it myself and figure out what's "okay" to wear.
Girls I do it because muh dick.
The only thing I don't understand is when normies check out your shoes
They want to sort you on their status list.

If you wear Nikes your status is higher.
People are shallow

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What kinds of compliments would you like to receive from a girl?
7 posts and 1 images submitted.

dont kill yourself i care about you ill always be there for you if you need someone
>Your dick is huge anon

>t. five inches
i'd rather hear feedback about what i'm doing wrong, what i could do to get liked by girls romantically and stuff like that. all compliments are good for is boosting one's ego but i prefer self-improvement over boosting ego.

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*blocks your path*

yyour response?
12 posts and 3 images submitted.

I've never fucking understood this image. What is the context
It's one last farewell from Emo Chad before he steps into his time machine to go back to his own timeline in the year 2004.

This answer is inadequete

Why don't you become a serial killer?
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
Because I main support
Well, I'm extremely retarded and probaly I would make no kills.
i'm not an edgy teenager, i prefer to watch everyone kill themselves

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>Mods letting blatant /pol/bait sit on the front page with 300 replies for hours

87 posts and 18 images submitted.
To annoy you.
Specifically you. Not "you" in general, as in the concept of the general /r9k/ user, but you the individual. You, OP, are the cause of this.
I seriously didn't hate /pol/ nearly as much before the election.
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tfw to intelligent to be soros stooge

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What is /r9k/ favorite type of dog
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
cybernetic robo-hound
telepathic dogs
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this kind of god... I am thinking about getting another one.
I own a Bulldog that's 1/4 American and 3/4 british. He's fucking adorable and I love him so much since he's my only friend

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Daily reminder that hair is a feminine treat and you should buzz off if you EVER want to be considered a man
14 posts and 4 images submitted.
>feminine treat
what did he mean by this
The three biggest action stars in the world? All bald. Take a hint haircucks
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Even a multimillionaire superstar Chad like Thor isn't safe from getting cucked by a bold (bald) MAN.
Women hate hair THAT much

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Fuck...we got blown the fuck out for once bros..
21 posts and 5 images submitted.
damn.. brought a tear to my eye
But he didn't say girls had to like being raped, just that it shouldn't be illegal. So that girls speech doesn't make sense.
He should have raped her after that.

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>buy a sandbox video game because it looks great
>start learning how to play it and messing around, thinking of all the fun I could have
>realize I don't have any friends to play it with
>have no will to play it by myself, never play it
16 posts and 2 images submitted.
>playing by yourself
>not the comfiest way to play a sandbox
I wish I could still enjoy vidya. I just don't see the fun anymore. I don't enjoy reading anymore either. Basically I just get absorbed in an interest and read until I feel I understand it and then I'm bored again until I find a new problem. Lately I've been stuck on pressure and tensile strength shit. Fortunately in some backwards I'm pretty dumb so it takes me a while to learn. I've got lots of fun notes on projects to try at least.
agree, that's comfy and enjoyable as fuck
what game op?

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>actually sex isn't as amazing and beautiful as porn shows it
25 posts and 7 images submitted.
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I just want someone to hold me god damnit
You must be having it wrong them. Sex is the best. So much that i am addicted to it. Oh what i wouldnt do to be in highschool again. All those times i went to the backwoods near my school and had rambunctious teen sex.
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>as amazing and beautiful as porn shows it
What did you mean by this?

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I've been a good boy today and only eaten 600 calories
9 posts and 4 images submitted.
That's too little. Starvation is a bad idea.
nice trips my guy

are you trying to lose weight or just proud?
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just be careful as you'll probably feel the need to binge the next time you eat

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