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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5866. page

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>tfw 40
>tfw khhv
28 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36751705
you are pretty old m8
>>
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Have sex.

original
>>
>>36751726
but am i too old anon?

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Who else here /stupid/?

Like I mean really stupid not just failing out of uni

>be me in middle school
>go to really shitty school
>get lowest grade on standardized exam
>want to stop going but my parents make me go to highschool
>put me in some really good charter school
>80% is some kind of asian
>start out in the lowest classes with some of the other deprate retards
>get lowest scores all of freshman year
>parents keep forcing me to "study" and even higher a touter
>make it into some AP courses
>wtfisgoingon.jpg
>One of the APs was human geography
>most people do not even try for this class and get 100%s
>everyone tells me its "common sense"
>end up getting a 2 on the AP
>all my other APs were 1
>transfer to special online highschool for senior year
>parents still trying to make me smart
>check on my progress
>Dad yells at me for getting half the assignments wrong
>parents still want me to go to college
>apply to 10 bad to medium schools
>get rejected at all, even those with a 90% acceptance

Fuck college got and try to become an EMT
>clas going ok, not the dumbest one there for the first time
>i am almost avrage at the practicle skills
>test time comes
>"how does and increase in CO2 concentration affect hemoglobins affinity for oxygen"
>i dont fuckig know, why the fuck do I need to know that for an emt
>most questions go like this and I fail

Fuck emt stuff

>parentd getting pissed
>get me a job with the uncle
>he is a doctor and I am to be his scribe
>supposed to be easy af
>follow him around and write down shit like a robot
>he leaves some comments out and expects me to fill in the blank
>told him I have no idea how

Still working as the scribe but no idea how long his will last

Anyone else also want to beat the shit out of their stupid fucking brian?
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
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I'm just replying to let you know that I have an IQ of 140, a well paying job and in spite of this I am still a fucking loser.
>>
>>36752844
I guess

Does that make the feel worse? I have seen a lot of people on here who make 100K plus engineering or are doctors. (The verified people not the randos who claim 300K math). How can you be smart and still a loser though? Doesnt being smart fix things? Or alteast some parts of your life?
>>
>>36753007
>Doesn't being smart fix things?

Intelligence doesn't mean social skill, which is far more important for having a good and fulfilling life.

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>Finish college. Get boring engineering job. Depressed af.
>In my country the youth can't afford a place, so they stay with their parents until 40, or share a flat.
>Crazy mom must know my credit card, email, and phone passwords. Always nagging. She has OCD. She refuses to take medication.
>No friends. Permavirgin.
>Super introverted, so I think I'm still better than sharing home with strangers.
>Meeting girls at college was hard, now almost impossible (work's a sausage fest).

>Weird uncle dies, and wills me his flat in a city. He wrote I must take the opportunity to flee from his sister's claws.
>Owning a home at 25 puts me in the richest 5%.
>Spend my first extra bucks in a psychologist and psychiatrist. Get antidepressants, fight extreme social phobia and OCD.
>Manage to move out with their help.

>Get research job at a uni (don't need so much money now). Calmer, less hours, socialize for the first time. Get a social circle. Still mostly guys.
> Lose my virginity to a whore, but I feel it doesn't count. Must get true love.
> Start lifting.
>Go to a choral society for young adults to meet more people (i.e. grills).
> Since now I own a home, dress well, teach at university, and play the piano, people call me "interesting."
> Still have many autistic quirks, though.

> 6.5/10 starts pursuing me. She's always chatting me out. I'm not used to attention. One day after rehearsal she kisses me.
>Get to my mcMansion. Hard as fuck.
>Open zipper and my modest cock pops out like a jack-in-the-box.
> Get a bad blowjob. Her energy seems to be dropping.
>Hand a condom to her. I get them in packs of 100 from Amazon.
> She looks at it and laughs. "Hahahaha, you buy a brand called MySize, Anon?".
>Feel very embarrassed. She's stil giggling.
>Try to fuck her but I can't keep the boner. She leaves.

I'm 27, still haven't cummed inside a girl I didn't pay, and feel like life now isn't better than when living with mom.
23 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>autist pretends to be chad and gets found out
>>
>>36751676
>You buy my size

Is there something cringy about this condom brand or it literally just because of the name?

I'm assuming you're German btw
>>
>>36751676
>feel like life now isn't better than when living with mom.

Oh man, just fucking kill yourself anon, you don't deserve the opportunity handed to you.

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So, my mom wrote an e-mail and demanded that I inform her about what's happening in my life and how I feel, because in the last phone-call I was very concise.

Now I have to write back. Can you help me figuring out how honest I should be?

Should I tell her that a part of me despises her and sees her as an enemy?
Should I tell her that I deplore the fact that I lack the heartlessness necessary to cut contact completely?
Should I tell her that I always feel down after meeting her and that a conversation with her is poison for all my hopes and desires?
Should I tell her that I went home grinning from the hospital the day she received her cancer-diagnosis?

Damn, I feel conflicted right now? Please help me /r9k/.
13 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36751675
If you actually hate her you send her an email back saying
"Nothing. I'm fine."
>>
>>36751714
but that's what i normally do, and it's getting on my nerves because then the same e-mails and phone-calls happen over and over again.
>>
Why do you hate your mom anon

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total autism stories

tell stories about when you were being an autistic retard. i'll start

>be me
>12 years old
>its Christmas day
>be exited as fuck because gonna get new animal crossing
>receive animal crossing game from aunt
>play it all day
>even bring it to school to play
>fast forward a couple of months
>there is a big cool event in my town where they release all the water from the dam
>don't give a damn, i really just want to play animal crossing
>almost to the location
>mom says to put it up sense were almost there
>i say just a couple more minutes
>decide to go to the island in the game
>were at the dam
>i go to save the game
>"you cannot save in this location"
>ohno.jpg
>my mom says put it up
>i have to ride all the way back to the town in the stupid boat
>takes about 2 minutes cause of the stupid fucking frog singing and i cant skip
>mom gets pissed off
>while im waiting my mom gets even more pissed off
>starts yelling at me and slaps me
>says were going home
>start crying and say sorry and that we can still go back
>says no
>this event only happens every 60 years
>wanna fucking kill myself when i get home
>have suicidal thoughts for about a week
all because of this stupid fucking game mechanic i ruined a perfect family moment

god damn autism man
9 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>me and my friends
>in kindergarden
>tried to stab a black kid with a plastic fork
>>
Your mom sounds like a bitch.

(not original)
>>
>>36751673
You literally could have just closed the DS and it would go automatically into sleep mode.

>>36751791
I took a stab at an annoying co-worker with a pen. I'm glad he dodged it hahahaha

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in this thread you can
>give (You)'s
>get (You)'s
remember, you get a (You), you must give a (You)
37 posts and 20 images submitted.
>>
As gay as it sounds, id like a (You)
Also OP, I like (You)
>>
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^ not giving (You).
>>
>>36751664
>>36751709
>>36751733
H-hey guys. I like (You) all so you can cum in my (You)pussy all you want desu.

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Post your shoes robots
123 posts and 56 images submitted.
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Politics of Saint Pierre and Miquelon takes place in a framework of a parliamentary representative democratic French overseas collectivity, whereby the President of the Territorial Council is the head of government, and of a multi-party system. Executive power is exercised by the government.
>>
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these bad boys

ori
>>
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Crocs| mecha shark edition

This happened back in January.
>Hanging out at church with 5/10 girl and her drugged-out friend who just wanders off
>girl tells me she likes me
>retarded loner side of me says "I like you too"
>regret this the next hour
>fast forward to three weeks later
>she breaks up with me on sunday and says she's not in the mood for relationship
>finally, I can be a shut-in again
>see her on tuesday
>she's in such a shitty mood
>talks shit about me
>MFW she claims I dumped her and was an asshole to her
>everybody else is talking smack behind her back for starting so much shit
>even her drugged-out friend doesn't like her
>fast forward to thursday
>hanging out with one of her ex-boyfriends who happens to also be my friend
>turns out she got a new boyfriend on fucking monday
>are you fucking kidding
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36751636
Did you at least originally fuck her?
>>
>>36751636
so you didn't even want her but you're upset she got a new bf?
>>
>>36752898
We didn't even go on a date.
Her other ex said the same thing.

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>you'll never be the cuck in a gay-cuckold relationship

why even live senpai
86 posts and 48 images submitted.
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>>36751630
>ywn be locked in chastity as you're forced to watch Chad fuck him hard
>ywn lick Chad's cum out of your bf's ass
You can fap to your fantasies though, opie.
>>
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>>36751686
>ywn be locked in chastity as you're forced to watch Chad fuck him hard
>ywn lick Chad's cum out of your bf's ass
omg, instant boner
>>
>>36751834
C'mon anon share your fantasies. You made a thread you can't just let it sink like that. I think I saw a ntr thread on /y/ a long time ago but I didn't save anything unfortunately.

BETA SQUADRON STANDING BY
8 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>36751629
3rdd armurd roastii blast squedrun reeeportng in
>>
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>>36751629
Thotmelters firing up, sir. We're about ready to engulf those degenerates in cleansing fire.
>>
>>36751629
>Terran Republic
Uh, that's not the right faction, sweetie.

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>when life is already going poorly and then you find termites or carpenter ants on your floor
7 posts and 3 images submitted.
>>
>>36751566
>the tits
post more
what is her name
>>
>>36751623
seconding this anon, pls salza
>>
Contract the carpenter ants to fix the weakened structure that the termites are responsible for.
The solution to the issue is right there, idiot.

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We May now - edition
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How much is a bed and breakfast these days in Bongistan? Do they still exist?
>>
>>36751573
Really depends on which area of the country you're staying - where are you thinking?
>>
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welcome! sit and hae a drop afore ye go

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Are virgies now the minority on r9k? Feels like this place is mostly normies now.

Let's take an informal survey. Please reply to this thread with the current status of your virginity: broken or intact.
341 posts and 44 images submitted.
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I am 19 years old and mine is sadly (( or perhaps thankfully? )) intact.
>>
>>36751528
that picture makes me really sad and angry

probably because i internalized those feelings from the last time i saw it 7+ years ago
>>
>>36751528
Who cares? It's not like you can stop non-virgins from posting anyways. Might as well stop sperging about it.

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What is the most interesting experience that you ever had anon? Asking because i am boring and curious.
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Had a very realistic dream that I was a murderer
>>
>>36751513
Yeserdaywas kholing and peaking on acid at the same time for two days in a row.

it was the most confusing and terrifying experience of my life. time dilation like you wouldn't believe. i thought I was legitimately dead and had accepted it
>>
>>36751935
>thinks being on drugs is interesting to anyone else

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>got brand new expencive phone
>iNormie.gif
>nobody to chat with
i just have 4 fucking contacts, how do normal people chat with a ton of people at once? I only write with one person on whats-normie, but i'm sure he don't want to anymore.
How to get more chats on whats-normie when nobody likes me?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>36751484
Post your number ill chat with you!
>>
I'll talk to you anon if you want, what's your whats-normie name?
>>
I'm german-fag, it's really hard writing on english for me


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