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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5524. page

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Is it a cuck thing to want your wife's last name?
>hypothetically speaking of course
Imagine you marry this ethnic chick that has a foreign and interesting sounding last name. Is it bad that you would take hers instead?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Yes you fat Americuck. Fuck off
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>>36934797
Yes. If you have to ask you need to self-assess.
>>
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>>36934858
Canadian

but nice strawman

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>School ends early
>Smoke a fat joint
>I get on the train to go home
>I sit next to two cuties
>Start burping uncontrollably
>Fuck
>The two girls are now looking at me in disgust
>I move to get closer to the door
>There's a family with a young kids
>Burps are super loud now
>I'm holding back vomit
>Try to say that I'm sorry but I keep burping
>Family give me the worst looks
>Train stops
>I vomit in a trashcan
>Puke is lime green

God what a fucking nightmare
52 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>36934745
GTFO NORMIE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
oringinalmo
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>>36934778
>Implying smoking alone after school is not robot behaviour
>>
>>36934745
That sounds rough anon, sorry you had to go through that

>got drylled at a beach one time
>was pretty early so no one else was around
>decide to walk to gas station to buy cigarettes
>cashier recognizes me, some dude I went to high school with
>ask for cigarettes
>for some reason get it into my head I only thought the words, not say them aloud
>end up repeating myself three times

I don't know which hurts more, the fact I made s complete fool of myself, or if the dude never even knew I was on drugs, because he figures I'm always that autistic

Why are you masturbating in the kitchen.
9 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36934679
GTFO NORMIE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
originalmo
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>>36934716
I'm not normal my mother had me tested.
>>
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actually this is open plan apartment and my penis is in the lounge

Pic unrelated
>Me
>A roastie
>Come here a few times, some of those times mention I'm a girl
>Get harassment and lewd, even threatening comments over being a girl
>Don't take them seriously, even though I belong here decide not to be a regular but check on occasion
>Be a dirty smelly filthy neet for the better part of three or four years
>Had a poor diet and not leave my room every so have bad skin and constantly look and feel like I'm dying
>Probably was desu, didn't take vitamins or even eat normal food, had like 900 calories a day in carbs
>Learn about nutrition, protein, slowly start eating more planned out meals but surprisingly lose weight because now I have the energy to move
>No longer bloated or constantly have a malnourished protruding stomach
>Take care of skin and eat fruits and work out once or twice
>Actually become sort of cute, still don't like my looks though and don't like myself because I'm a useless jobless sack of manure
>Meet a cute guy
>He's perfect, shy, nerdy, in that socially acceptable not autistic overboard way, unbelievably hot, very sweet and kind, best sense of humor
>Imnotworthy.jpg
>You guys would call him Chad, based off of his looks
>He likes me despite all my faults, the ones he doesn't know about anyway lol
>We are going to get married and I won't have to ever worry about finding a guy again
I guess I don't actually want to date a robot after all
47 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36934636
See? Girls can't be robots lol.
>>
so you became a stacy to come here to gloat and demean?
>>
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Very interesting story I must say

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I need help with a girl. We text a lot. Like all day every day. A friend reasons that means she's in to me, but she's infinitely out of my league. I see her at school every day, but we never talk. Sometimes we text during class, but we never talk. She's got her friends, and I've got my memecunts. She talks about all this fun stuff we should do together, but it doesn't seem like this would realistically happen because we never talk. What do I do? I have no money or prospects. Is it remotely possible she likes me? If nothing else, just convince me to stop cucking myself.
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Without a doubt you should kill yourself
Oringinalmo
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you should leave this place then kill yourself

organelle
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>>36934634
>I talk to a girl every day
What the fuck? Kill yourself

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What's your biggest fear /r9k/?
29 posts and 5 images submitted.
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Your mother. That bitch can take my fat NEET cock so we'll it's scary.
>>
I'm graduating in two weeks. That means I'm going to have to get a job soon
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>>36934629
being responsible

also time

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Is there anything worse than having a pencil dick?
22 posts and 9 images submitted.
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>>36934576
Why the fuck does that guy get so much work in porn? I'm so sick of his accent and his slim jim.
>>
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Nope. You should KYS no bitch will ever love you now
>>
>>36934576
having a short dick

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dear roasties,

you aren't wanted here, you have a million other websites that cater to your bullshit. cant you see what your doing? you've brought hordes of normalfags here and ruined what alot of us called home. if you have a shred of remorse or soul you will leave this board and never return. go to lolcow or reddit
13 posts and 5 images submitted.
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self bump,

i need to know atleast 30 roasties saw this
>>
Anon, not once in the history of mankind has a female ever posted in our site
>>
We need ways to eradicate the worst roastie to land here. >>36933380

Post your face when love doesn't real
7 posts and 4 images submitted.
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Kill yourself faggot
Orinintir
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>>36934545
that's an odd face
>>
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If love does not real then why is I feel?

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>yeah I'm just not really into weed, but it's not that big of a dea-
OH WHAT'S THE MATTER PUSSY? ARE YOU A LITTLE BABY BITCH? YOU STUPID FUCK? ARE YOU JUST A LITTLE PUSSY BITCH WHO DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING? OH NO YOU MISSED YOUR FLIGHT? FUCK YOU, GET THE FUCK OFF MY SHOW. FUCKING PUSSY. FUCK OFF
14 posts and 4 images submitted.
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>J-joe... okay dude you're right... you win, just please stop yelli-
OH HONEY, YOU'RE ADORABLE. YOU DON'T THINK WEED CURES CANCER? OKAY FUCKFACE, WATCH THIS. JAIMIE, PULL UP THOSE STATISTICS THAT PROVE I'M RIGHT. SEE? SEE HOW FUCKING WRONG YOU ARE, CROWDER? YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT AND YOU SHOULD KILL YOURSELF.
>Joe... i missed my flight, I really need to g-
OH YOU MISSED YOUR FLIGHT? SORRY PRINCESS, IT'S TOO BAD YOU DIDN'T GET ON THAT PLANE BECAUSE I WISHED IT WOULD HAVE FLOWN RIGHT INTO THE FUCKING TRADE CENTER. YOU'RE WORTHLESS, CROWDER. I'LL DO YOU A FAVOR YOU LITTLE BITCH-- I'LL MAKE A ROPE OUT OF HEMP AND THEN YOU CAN HANG YOURSELF WITH IT. GET THE FUCK OFF MY SHOW
>>
RIP STEVENS FLIGHT


It will be missed.
>>
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>>36934521
GTFO NORMIE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Orrin

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i'm drunk as fuck please kill me.

does anyone have any drinking pepes?
6 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36934515
For (You) oragana
>>
>>36934515
i only had a single glass yesterday. I'm hoping to do the same today or none at all.

haven't got any drinking pepes though
>>
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>>36934562
thanks, but i feel this is more of a piss bottles pepe.

>>36934563
why would you NOT want to get drunk?

this is officially a drunk thread.

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Lately I've been way too much time thinking, and unfortunately I've been remembering a bunch of memories I had repressed. Feel free for any of you to post shit from your childhood ITT, I'm not the kind of person who is capable of giving advice, but at least I can be something of a kindred spirit who can listen.

>be the youngest of 4 children. Siblings gang up on me and strip me of my clothes, stuff me in my sisters ballet tutu, and throw me down stairs as I fall and cry. My dad sees me, and hits me for being a queer
>dad is super lazy and abusive. Remember him laying on the couch, eating ridiculous amounts of junk food and laughing at Homer Simpson's antics. Can't figure out what is funny about the Simpsons because he acts exactly like Homer
>one time my mom bought the wrong type of ginger ale and my dad threw a tantrum and threw every can, one by one, across the house, just like donkey kong
>had a cat. At one point it ate a beef roast that was supposed to be for dinner. Dad throws it off second floor deck, and declares the cat is no longer aloud inside. Cat takes refuge in garage where it eventually licks up some anti freeze, and dies
>one time my oldest sister is having a mental breakdown. Grabs a kitchen knife with tears running down her eyes and sails she's goi g to fucking do it. My brother looks right at her, laughs, and says just do it then. I can't remember what happened after that
>one time my siblings pressured me into doing something dumb (can't remember what) dad instructs me to hit my own head against the wall as punishment. Doesn't let me leave until I hit my head as hard as I can
>my dad was showing off his Vikings horn to us. I was jumping up and down because I was excited (the horn was longer than I was at the time) I accidently hit my head against it. My dad, who was big and muscly enough to be a Viking himself hit me hard. I woke up next to a broken mirror I crashed into
25 posts and 9 images submitted.
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>>36934499
Con't
>one time my siblings played a prank on me when I got home. They locked me out of the house and pretended not to know who I was. I ran away and cried for hours until a police officer saw me and drove me home after I explained what happened. Dad beat us all as punishment

>at one point we decided to adopt another cat, for god knows what reason. I end up torturing the poor thing to insanity. Whenever a person got too close to it, it attacked them like their life depended on it, and desperately tried to escape every time someone opened a door in the house

>one time I decided to see how long I could go without opening my mouth. I went 6 days before my sister asked my asked me if there was supposed to be anything better on TV

>after my parents divorce my mom locked herself in her room, and refused to leave. She would just cry loudly all day. This went on for MONTHS. Literally the only thing to eat in the house was frozen pizza, since the oldest one in the house was 15 at the time. It got so bad we had to ask our dad to take custody
>>
>>36934723
Con't
>had to get sent to a mental hospital at one point after a suicide attempt. End up getting paired with a roommate who apparently was not only gay, but also sexually attracted to 12 year old boys. End up getting molested by him. He said if I tell anyone, he would kill himself. Next night, same shit happens again. Make up some shit to the hospital staff and insist I change rooms

This is all i can remember at this point off the top of my head. If I remember more, and if people are interested I can post more, but I feel really tired after writing all this.
>>
>>36934499
Haha, I'm glad my only repressed memories are of my dad yelling at me and telling me he'd give me something to cry about if I didn't 'stop'.

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What's your malfunction, /r9k/?

Me I think every girl i see and meet should only talk to me and no other guy or i get depressed for days
46 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>36934496
I got a girlfriend once

Never again
>>
>>36934556
what happened my dude?
>>
>>36934601
Ah just the same bullshit, 2 years in a relationship when all seems well(for the most part) to end like nothing just because the girl wanted to suck another dick.

All the talk about ''you are my soul mate'' and ''i want to marry you'' doens't mean a single thing.

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I'm posting kakyoin with cool sunglasses every day

day45

almost weekend feels
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>36934460
>almost weekend feels
I like that added line wonder why you had to add that
>>
>>36934460
I'm posting kakyoin with cool sunglasses every day

day47
>>
>>36934476

because i wake up everyday depressed forcing myself out of bed to work 8 hours just to come home, have trouble sleeping and doing it over again


at least on the weekend i can sleep in until 12pm

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I am please to confirm I have had my morning cup of coffee

You may converse with me, but keep it brief.

You'll have to keep any complex talk until after my SECOND cup of coffee
108 posts and 56 images submitted.
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I hate you so god damn much.


originelli
>>
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Do you take sugar with your coffee, friend?
>>
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no Wait!
I have not brushed my teeth, don't talk to me until I finish my morning mentos


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