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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 5267. page

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>spot me anon!

what course of action to you take?
24 posts and 9 images submitted.
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I spot her, obviously. Don't want her to get hurt.
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>>37228753
It's only 65 pounds you weak bitch
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RDLs with the bar only. Aren't women supposed to be closer to men when it comes to leg and back strength?

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Nothing because any girl above 2/10 can find at least 10 men that would fuck them easily
60 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>37228493

Being obese.

That was an easy one.
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being fat. sure they might still get laid, but no decent man wants to date a fat chick.
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>>37228522
Men have a 'THICC' fetish, women don't lust for manlets you fucking cuck.

I think I'm actually dying robots.
I went to a state park with my weeb friend yesterday and I shot some of the spring water into my nose while swimming. Either I'm seriously ill mentally, but I have symptoms of having naegleria fowleri, a brain eating amoeba.
I may actually die in 5 days. I woke up this morning unable to count to 6 without trying at least 8 times. And other symptoms like smell and taste seem to have manifested as well.
The disease actually has 95% mortality rate, and the 4 cases of people who have lived got treatment right away.
wat do?
128 posts and 12 images submitted.
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>>37228305
F amoebanon
>>
you're an idiot
the bad news is you can't die from ignorance
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>>37228350
why am I an idiot? I'm in the one of the states it's most common, not that it isn't rare.

http://www.cnn.com/2016/08/23/health/brain-eating-amoeba-florida-teen-survives/

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Yall seemed to be upset about my story yesterday dealing with the girl that got kicked out of my school for kicking me in the balls. So I figured I'd follow up on a better explanation.
22 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>37228253
When I was 12 I wasn't near as confident as I am now. Had alot of lady friends but always was afraid to take the next step, especially because I had the feeling that my next gf would be the first to learn my kink.

This goth girl moved with her mother to my small town, let's call her Lexi. she stayed off on her own and seemed like a bitch. she had a great rack for as young as we were and jet black everything which really turned me on. She would sit and read anime every class and refuse to do any work.

I ended up talking to her about a Manga she was reading, maybe inuyasha, but we hit it off and I got her number. Through alot of friends convincing me to, I asked her out and she said yes.

Moving things along...I used to go to her house every weekend. Her mom laid in bed all day cuz she was morbidly obese, her aunt wandered around the house cooking for herself and the fat mom and lexi's cousin stayed in his room so we would stay upstairs in her room all day and not be bothered.

She loved giving blow jobs more than anything and I never told her about my Ballbusting kink but she hit me in the balls once when we were fooling around and I didn't act negative about it so I think she got the message. She wasn't like what I have now though, she would bite, squeeze knee and kick me in the balls for fun or to get what she wanted from me regardless if I wanted it or not.

Fast forward more, lexi became crazy. She wouldn't let me have lady friends, she always accused me of cheating. And her Ballbusting was turning severe. So I went home after school and broke up with her via text.
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>>37228266

For a month after she would choke me at school and attack me, my friends held her off me best they could. Then when I was talking to my new girlfriend in the hall Lexi ran up and kicked me in the balls so hard I fainted. Waking up in the office I learned she was expelled for ten days, then she was moved to Alt. Ed. Then my family started offering money to anyone who would attack her. She ended up moving off to live with her dad.

I don't deal with her today but my wife's cousin is good friends with her. Apparently she still hates any girl I talk to and wishes me a slow and painful death or a lifetime of suffering
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To avoid all the reading, I date a goth chick from a shitty home. She went crazy and got herself kicked out of town

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could you ever truly love a non virgin girl?.How can you love her,she said I love you to her previous bfs already,what meaning is there in her love if she already proved she wont keep her love.How can you love someone whos had dick inside her.How can you love someone who has degraded herself for another man

Im a virgin man btw
36 posts and 4 images submitted.
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I just want to impregnate as many women (females) as possible to be quite frank
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>>37228145
You didn't have to mention you were a virgin. Your most made it apparent enough.
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>>37228145
Yeah but I don't think they could every truly love me back.

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>Jessica Nigiri makes 11x the average annual household income for playing dressup
Defend this.
24 posts and 2 images submitted.
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attractiveness class war when?
BETA UPRISING WHEN?
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i wanna put my peepee in her pusy
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Promotional models make on average $40,000 a year, how Jessica does it per month is crazy

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Is it gay to like gardening? I love my gardening and my super macho neighbor was passing by my house when I was tending to my garden and said I should start wearing a skirt at this rate.
48 posts and 6 images submitted.
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It's pretty gay. I can't think of a more feminine hobby than gardening.
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I used to be 6'5, 280lb of shredded muscle. I fucked different girls every single night and I never paid for drinks at bars because the owner would always be impressed with how fucking manly I was. I had it all, the motorcycle, the big bangin house, 65" flatscreen, bigass couch for all the boys to come lounge and watch football on, a 12 inch cock.

Then one day I accidentally touched a plant. My dick shrank to the size of an acorn, my knees went weak as I shrank an entire foot, all my muscle turned into pasty flab and my chest grew sad little tits. My balls shrank to the size of jelly beans, and all my clothes became pink lace. My asshole started sucking inwards with the force of a small planet, jamming itself as full as possible with as many dicks as it could find.
Before I knew it my sad little dick was spewing its sterile jizz all over and I was moaning like a whore.
Don't end up like me. Don't touch plants. It's gay.
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>>37227911
Well yes its very gay, gardening is feminine as hell man, I mean a man if he plants acres of corn is farming thats fine but a man gardening no thats 100% gay

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I just don't see the point in going on
31 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>37227597
if you kill yourself now you won't get to see drumpf impeached in july
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>>37227610
who fucking cares
the world could burn or all diseases could be cured, my life will still be shit
>>
Do it, you pussy. Also post a video. I haven't fapped yet today.

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Well, today was my 20th Birthday.

Time sure does fly on by.
22 posts and 4 images submitted.
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just hit 20 a week ago, shits getting real fast I dont even have a job yet and im gettin married in august
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>>37227538
I feel you brother, I'm turning 21 in a few weeks and I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing
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>>37227538
>>37227571
>>37227592
You babbies have no idea of the pain yet to come. I'm almost 22 and still here.

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Trap-posters are disgusting. Let's segregate them all to one thread. TRAP THREAD.
24 posts and 17 images submitted.
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season two when?
>>
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>>37227438
Disgusting. But here's a cute trap anyway.
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>>37227524
?
Originally accusing the robot

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>Any Iast words, shitlord?
22 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>37227236
>BE A MAN AND PUSH THAT TRIGGER
I bet it would cause a system failure in her roastie brain.
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>>37227273
>OMG DID YOU SERIOUSLY CALLED ME MAN YOU WHITE MISOGYNISTIC CIS SCUM??
>>
I'm glad you're taking careful aim at point blank
wouldn't want to miss, bet you don't even have a bullet in the gun goddamn
and point that shit up at my eyes bitch

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Why do people smoke cigarettes? What do they get out of it?
101 posts and 17 images submitted.
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>>37226937
because it makes me look cool. im not joking either
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>>37226974
I always assumed it calmed nervousness....
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>>37226937
lung cancer then death duh dumbass its like why do people become alcoholics it to speed up death and escapism

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no matter how shit is your life, no matter how sad you are , remember to find a to be fucking happy and fucking everyone else.
we are all fucking sad and suffering so fuck it
i hope from the bottom of my heart that we will get through this
24 posts and 8 images submitted.
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>>37226761
the text was already made me super glad, and the rikka just made me feel even better, thanks anon
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No thanks OP I think I'm gonna kill myself

If only I wasn't too much of a pussy
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To find a what
A WHAT
Please Rikka tell me I want to be happy too.

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Where do you get your news
45 posts and 6 images submitted.
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/pol/ is the only unbiased reputable source of news.
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>>37226754
>unbiased
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>>37226730
>Where do you get your news

I trust nintendo

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>start talking with a girl online
>she lives on another continent with 5 hours time difference
>think nothing of her or any of this at first
>continue talking anyway, we exchange pictures after she asks
>she is pretty cute and says i'm cute as well
>this has never happened before, no girl have said this to me
>continue talking, eventually she confesses that she has a crush on me
>this isnt happening.jpg
>exchange more pictures, i start having a crush on her too
>i tell her my problems, and she doesn't mind
>she is shy, awkward, has low confidence and pretty clingy but i like that
>she says she has been thinking about me a lot
>eventually mentions that she wants to meet and is willing to travel and meet with me in the summer if i want to because apparently her parents are rich
>fuck it i have nothing to lose
>we start making plans, she is coming in july
>eventually she tells me that she wants to be my first kiss when we meet
>tell her i'm somewhat nervous and inexperienced
>she says she doesn't mind and that she'll make a move and help me if i want her to
>we officially agreed to become a couple
>tfw now i have a gf
>begs me not to cheat on her and tell her if i want to break up instead, in return she promises to do the same
>she is everything i've ever wanted from a girl

Did i make it robots? I've never been in a relationship or had a gf before. I understand that this might not work out in the end due to the distance, but i've also read that it can work out for some people, you just need to have long term plans. I've got plenty of money saved up at the moment to visit her in the future too and i've always wanted to visit and maybe live in the US

Ask me anything
37 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>37226597
glad you got her anon, i hope your couple will last long :)

now, get out ! >:(
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My LDR worked out. It's been a year.
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findre...?


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