Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 4618. page

>>37732496
You were never a robot you failed normie fuck. Die in a fire.

>>37732496
nice! i'm happy for you :)

Remember to get her pregnant and save the white race.

>play BF2 (long fucking time ago, must be around 2006)
>be very bad at flying and shooting from helis
>running next to heli spawn point when heli respawn
>some guy took it, then shout "jump in" to me
>nah man, I'm really shitty with flyers, I'll kill us both in 20 seconds
>jump in, don't worry, I tell you what to do
>I don't think this gonna work, but OK
>I'm the gunner, he's a pilot
>the guy is fucking heli wizard, pulling stunts that I don't even know are possible in BF
>and in the same time he giving me a shitload of perfect targets to kill
>end up with 3 digits score for this round (up to this time I barely score more than 10 when in chopper), and heaps of badges and pins
>got a msg after this:
>you see Anon? I told you you can do it
>man, it's only because you are so fucking good at flying this thing.
>well, kind of, ha ha (I checked: the guy was fuckin FIFTH best bf2 helo pilot worldwide)
>start chating
>guy is very nice, always cherfull and cracking jokes
>the guy was retired heavy building equipment mechanics in his mid 50. He retired because he had an accident where his leg get fucking crushed. he barely can walk now. his friend son showed him a BF2 one day and he started to playing it
>having nothing else to do all days, he become fucking good
>we played together for about 6 months or so. he fucking teach me flying choppers in game so well that I end up in 20 best world bf2 heli pilots at that time
>I moved to different city (for college) and lost conact with him. Also, due to work and study don't have a time for playing anymore
>Now the guy must be in his late 60, or even dead.
>I hope you are well and kickin', you cool old geezer; you vere coolest online chap I've ever meet.

guy on the left is probably happier than OP

>>37732744
I'II take things that never happened for 1,000

>>37732343
These fucking crazy dubs

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I want to rub oil on their abs and work my way down until I'm giving them a handjob.

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>tfw you will never have a Strong Black Man to look after you

stew in your misery psycho

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>>37732366
Enough, please help me.

Just be friendly to toads from now on

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>dad found the dick dressing
I can hear him crying upstairs.

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>social worker found the slovenian girls smelly socks shipment

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>cleaning lady found the hiv syringes
i knew it was bad idea to steal them from hospital

>>37732308
I'm currently taking it and it works perfectly for me. I've tried many other meds and none of them did anything or didn't give the same lasting effect as Zoloft does. It's shit for other people, just like with any other AD drugs. It's a trial and error thing.

>>37732308
Ya, it's fine. Basically legal drugs that give you a constant high and flaccid penis.

>>37732308
Pretty good for me tbqhfam.
Got prescribed the generic brand and am on 200mg daily. Felt the effects in like a week.

16 can fuck up to 24
17 can fuck up to 25
you still got a chance, highschool girls always trying to catch that college boy dick, start pumping weights and somehow start talking to some highschooler.

you could always try being the creep who chats up highschool girls at starbucks or something

>>37732285
but the only 16 year olds who fuck 22 year olds are usually slags.. so not that good

>girl looks in my general direction
>imagine marrying her, starting a family, and growing old together

It's not just me right?

the fuck, that's a sign that you shouldn't be a wizard. I'm a wizard because no girl has ever showed interest in me in my whole life. and I wasn't always a shut-in either, I went to school and had jobs and everything. but whatever, the more the merrier I guess.

>>37732159
OP here. I do this every time

have you tried pizza???

>all the toothpaste and toothbrushes in the world can't make the holes in my teeth go away
But a bullet will make a hole that'll solve all my problems. Any day now.

>>37732116
yes it can, if you eat all of it you'll die and you'll be golden

No one can tell you what to do when you are dead. And you wont(probably) have to listen to them bitch,moan and cry over stupid shit anymore

There is no afterlife and you can return from where we once all came from.

If you believe in reincarnation, you will probably spawn again just like in games as another random being.
Also suicide frees you from responsiblity of living this world. If no misses you though then go ahead and kill yourself. Like anyone gives a fuck about you anyway.

not weird but annoying if you have an ugly body

>>37731778
Time to take things up a notch and start only wearing underwear.

I literaly walk around naked unless guests happen to be at the house. And even then i just have shorts on.

>>37731659
you could say this about anything though. Reading, watching sports, watching tv, etc.

>>37731659
you're honestly a retard.

>>37731659
>and now visualize yourself playing it in front of a crowd
speak for yourself ya cunt
>implying you would listen to songs you created
christ you're a retard

>>37731627
a long time ago.

basically a link from zelda ripoff, and then a gaara ripoff from naruto with a sword

that's really it I never devoted a ton of time to drawing even though I went through small phases of wanting to make my own manga after watching certain animes

my stupid life

>>37731732
My whole life has been one long retarded humiliation where I never became anything or did anything

I lost interest in things, moved on, lost interest, suffered identity crisises, lost all motivation and have been dragging myself through

the whole thing is really dumb and sad

I am my original character

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Yup. Worse still it was a self insert.
I loved flcl in high school but i always thought the ending was lane so i write fan fiction about naota years in the future going off into space to find haruko and mamimi tagging along to document the voyage. When he finds her shes in love with a metal head alien stoner dude. This was me obviously. Me and naota butted heads but eventually became bros after we had to defeat more medical mechanica robots. He gets ckosure and ends up with mamimi, me and haruko fly off into space again.

>>37731534
No there's plenty that are better like welcome to the nhk for example this is the robot anime.

>>37731564
>welcome to the nhk
>robot anime

:^)

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oregairu is the ultimate robot anime
you can't prove me wrong

They're scary and mean

>>37731499
what even is going on with that shoulder

They're inherently cruel but will assume a guise of innocence when necessary.