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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 4497. page

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>Been a NEET for two years since leaving High School.
>Parents getting fed up with me not doing anything.
>Forced me to apply for a job, ended up applying for a job at KFC.
>Already been offered an interview.
>Freaking out.

8 posts and 1 images submitted.
Why not do anything?
Aren't you afraid of not achieving anything in life and being a NEET till you die?
there's nothing wrong with work

Give me that 1% of normie memes that are actually funny.
8 posts and 5 images submitted.
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These are alright memes.
Ikr. Normies are good at stealing memes and posting them on facebook.
Only the more sinister ones are funny though

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>tfw no unattractive bf
8 posts and 4 images submitted.
I'm right here babe and not afraid to buy some ugly ass new glasses kek
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>tfw no active nutter gf
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Thanks, Doc.

I'm ugly in all senses of the word.

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>Be me
>21 y/o Chad
>had sex 5 times today
>driving daddy's new sportscar
>get pulled over
>cop starts writing a ticket
>he suddenly notices my chiselled jawline
>sees my 12 inch cock
>"S-Sorry sir, I'm sure you have a good reason for speeding. Another date with Stacey, huh? Haha. Best get to it!"
>slap him in the face and drive off
>sleep with Stacey's sister as well

Feels good being a Chad
6 posts and 3 images submitted.
cringe xd
so you had a bi cop pull you over did he have a good look at your equipment
"""Quality""" posts bro. I sure am """glad""" you're contributing to the board.

I have never touched or seen boobs in real life. Are they worth it?
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
Yes, but everything under C is just a joke. D is nice, because they fit great in the hands. More is fine, but too less ( under C) isn't enough to grab and enjoy
I like 'em flat like a little boy

ngl, they're pretty great. I went out with a fat girl when I was 17 and hers were size E or something, it was awesome. First pair of boobs I ever touched and unfortunately they'll probably also be the last

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>Be "chad"
>Give plenty of fembots their first orgasm
>They come back for more because I am the "first"
>Have lots of female sex friends this way
>They somehow can't comprehend the clitoris was the key to this.
>Why are fembots so dumb?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Fembots? I'm sure you mean females.
Fembots don't have boyfriends and are kissless virgins.
why do you torment us?

post this somewhere else and leave us alone

Problem? Faggot? Foggot?

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Is it healthy to not eat for 3 days? I haven't eaten in 3 and a half days
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
it's healthy. i suggest not eating for a couple more weeks. trust me
you should eat something, anon. I had a gf that would always starve herself and it fucked with her mental and physical health so much.
please eat something for me, baka!!

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How do I get to the next bonfire?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
As much as it pains me, Dark souls is over nigga

You Defeated
Illusory wall ahead.
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I've got this step by step tutorial.

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The first time I saw a pussy IRL, I got grossed out. What did that mean?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
that theyre fucking gross.
They are pretty ugly looking regardless of if you are straight or gay.
Genitals in general are kind of gross, if you're not already aroused you're not going to think they look nice.

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Since it gets mentioned in so many threads: In the West*, what is the ideal female/male height difference? Like where do most women set their cutoff point? Obviously there is the "must be at least 6'0" (slightly above the average male height) meme, but if I'm 6'0" do I really have a shot with a girl who is 5'9"?

Or is the rule actually "you must be x inches taller than me", and if so, what is x?

*EU, Canada, USA
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
*Oh, and for my European friends:

in my experience rifling through countless profiles on okc and other platforms, the ideal ratio seems to around 9/10. woman is 90% of man's height

I literally don't care about a woman's height. I like if she is as tall as me, I don't mind if she's shorter, and I don't mind if she's taller.

My preferred height is close to my own, on the smaller side. The only problem would be if she is way taller or really, really short.

Yo bots!
/biz/ here!
How can i escape the crashing realm of reality, forget about my investments and let the days pass by?

Would like to fast forward around two years of my life, and you dudes seem to be experts at that.
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
alcohol my dude
Leave this place and never return.
For your own sake.
nah man don't want a beer gut and wasting my money.

no worries dude, i used to hang around here all the time a year ago when the robot was disabled, only stopped due to wagecucking.

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>24 years old
>had sex with many women
>stopped counting after the first 10
>a lot of these women were beautiful
>two are actual models
>never had a gf
>really want a gf
>go to friends pregame last weekend before going out
>drink some beer
>reminisce about our frat back in college
>start talking to stacey friend
>"...so anon, what was YOUR longest relationship?"
>"u-uhh... haha um... one y-year?"
>go out
>hook up with some sorority bimbo
>try and hold back the tears as im cuddling her, knowing i dont have a stable gf and will never experience true love, just meaningless sex

i hate being a robot, it really takes a toll on my emotions sometimes. normies dont understand that even though i look happy on the outside, i am depressed on the inside. how do you guys deal with the sadness? i feel like one day im going to snap from my depression...
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>i hate being a robot
It's like listening to a guy cry about no cake white feasting on a buffet as you starve in the corner
This is bait I presume. Being able to get laid at all without hookers means you aren't a robot.
These baits are not even creative anymore

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Am I truly the greatest idiot here r9k?

I had a great girlfriend, she was attractive, had cute quirks, the cutest voice ever... she was submissive, but also hyper sexual and pleasing when she was in the mood. She plays games like me and she had a vaguely similar political outlook to me. problem is, she was a complete normie.

Why is being a normie a bad thing you ask? Because I'm not a normie. My interests aren't pop music, looking at cat videos, norie tv shows etc. Aside from gaming, we had almost nothing in common. There was never any in-depth "laying on the grass looking at the stars and talking about life" moment. She would go to work, I would go to work, we would get back, play games, ask eachother how our day was, fuck, and maybe watch a movie.

Over time, we just stopped talking. We never had anything to talk about.

Today, we decided to mutually separate. That whole year of an almost perfect relationship, over, because we don't have anything interesting to talk about. She loved me, and I loved her, she was attractive, and we barely ever argued about anything. I can't think of a single bad thning to say about her. She never cheated or even looked at any other guy, she was totally submissive to me... and I just let her walk away over fucking nothing. No argument, no disagreement over something... just "meh lets split up."

The annoying thing is, I'll never find a girl as good as her again, and the only reason I lost her is because we got "bored" of eachother. So fucking stupid.

Make fun of me r9k, I feel like I need someone to shout at me and tell me I'm fucking retarded.
10 posts and 3 images submitted.
Eh, chances are she was a slut.
Die in a fire normie
Nope, the honeymoon period passed.

You'll find another gf.

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even if i find a qt what would i have to offer
>no job
>no car
>no house or apartment
the feeling loneliness is horrible, I'm fucked lads i should just be an hero
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
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What prevents you from getting a job and getting /fit/?
i don't know where to start, i haven't went to college and i don't have much job experience aside from one part time job
i tried exercising but never lost the weight
>i don't know where to start
I started at Walmart for part-time minimum wage. I could be as autistic as I wanted, working backroom nobody cared.
>never lost the weight
I've never had to lose weight, skeletonmode my whole life, but I believe for weight loss anything that gets your heart rate up is best, probably jogging. Hiking builds some muscle but doesn't really do much for weight loss I believe, as proof I can point to a ton of fat hikers.

If you can into bicycling, I believe that's a great weight loss technique. The faster the better, and obviously downhill or an easy pace on level pavement probably wouldn't do shit.

Remember an ugly face can be brought up several points with a /fit/ body, too.

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Because everything I do is wrong. Even the things I do right are wrong, because I don't present it right. The way I stand or sit is wrong. The way I talk is impossible to understand. I use the wrong words and phrases, I can't talk clearly because I never needed to talk.

None of the things people do make no sense. Why would anybody have a hobby? Why would you even talk to another human being?

Why would I have a job? It's not even possible to get and retain a job at this point. Same with education. It's just too much, too overwhelming, and it'll never ever get any better. Even say 'hi' to someone is impossible.

There's literately nothing to talk about with other people: They are 100% different and we can't relate to each other in any way.

They know I'm not a human. I were, they wouldn't have bullied me all my life.
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
Suicide booths when? Uu
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>Why would anybody have a hobby?
because becoming better at things shows you're capable. A side effect of not having that is, well, your feeling of inadequacy
>Why would you even talk to another person?
Some people are interesting, and they can hold your heart for a moment or two. Regale of pasts, or build a sense of belonging. The side effect of not doing it is, well... feeling isolated.
>Why would I have a job?
because the days are long, and to not have that dynamic between work and play isn't the best of things. If you don't have that dynamic, well... It makes you think all of life is work and nothingness.
>There's literally nothing to talk about with other people.
If you've nothing to say, and the person doesn't have anything to say, that's okay. Sometimes the better thing to do is activities. To not share activity, well... it makes you think all relations are worthless.
>They are 100% different and we can't relate to each other in anyway
If we we're all the same, wouldn't that be a boring existence? You already know everything about everybody, thus truly making interaction worthless. If you can't relate to each other, then they're either a person that isn't for you, or you've too afraid to relate upon things that are a bit excessive, or too much: vulnerability. Without vulnerability, well... you really think no one else shares the same feelings as you.
You have a lot of automatic negative thinking that any half baked psychologist would declare "fixable."

But yeah, I don't like most people. Most people are garbage.

Jobs are hard to come by these days, and most pay shit. Why even bother? Unless you network and have solid relationships, you're pretty much fucked. You can't make up for it after your early 20s. After your 20s, most people start pruning relationships and only nurture the most beneficial ones. If you dont have good relationships by the time you are 25, you're pretty much fucked.

Education is useful, but only if you are allowed to apply it. If you can't find a job or continue your education at a worthwhile institution, then why bother?

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