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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 4364. page

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>be shut in for 3.5 years
>decide to man up and go outside
>work up all my courage and leave my neet cave for the outside world
>walk outside and the sun shine hurts my skin and eyes
>waddle towards a nearby shopping center so I can be around other people
>see group of Stacies approaching me
>decide if I ever want to make something of my self, I have to learn how to interact with others
>muster up courage and say hi to them while nodding
>they look at me with horrified expressions
>"Oh my god, what the hell is wrong with you?" "Rape!" "Someone help us!"
>get scared, this is why I never leave the house
>group of Chads hear the commotion and come up to us
>they surround me and won't let me leave
>"why are you bothering these girls? Are you a perv or something?
>"I just said h-"
>get hit really hard in the side of the head
>as I try and get back up one of the Chads grabs one of the Stacies asses
>"oh, Chad!"
>he takes his dick out and jerks off on her thigh really fast
>all the Stacies laugh and the Chads start cheering their friend on and helping him stroke his dick
>some black kid steals my phone while I keep trying to get up

Tell me again why I should ever leave the house?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>37781118
OREEEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEEEOREEEEOREEEEEOREEEEEOREEEEEOREEEEEOREEEEOREEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEOREEEEOREEEEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEEOREEEOREEEOREEEEEOREEEEOREEEEEEeeee
>>
>>37781118
Fucking life this is not fair
>>
>>37781118
people suck. what sucks more is most of us expect stacies and chads to like us when we should really be looking for other robots in public. But we don't leave the house enough or the only time we venture socially is some situtation that is sure to turn sour like op's.

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Would you rather be someone who works hard for his things or someone born into greatness?
9 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>37781104
Born into greatness. You can work hard and get nowhere.
>>
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it's what cards you are dealt with, and how you are supposed to play with em, and if you can play them well, and hope an earthquake won't totally throw off your cards off the table and maybe the ceiling won't collapse on you either, or/and prepare for such a thing to happen so maybe you won't have those things happen to you, but then you gotta consider if you preparing or not is really your fault or not, but then we'll get deterministic there so its safer to assume you have responsibility for your actions the actions of other forces that may affect you :D
>>
>>37781104
Work hard, assuming that that means I still get greatness

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You have nine (9) seconds to say something nice about my oneitis.
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
>>37781089
Pigface? Again?

What's actually wrong with you? Joke stopped being funny a little while ago.
>>
>>37781089
Honestly I like her.

I feel like she could maximize her potential by getting into body building. That's the kind of body that looks amazing with lots of squats, deadlifts, etc.

I saw a YouTube video where some thicker girl was at a female pull up contest. She was bigger than all the other girls managing one or three, and she cranked out like 10, because under the layer of chubb there was a ton of muscle. I love that look for girls. Lot of muscle. Layer of fat.

Soft + Powerful.
>>
>>37781089
looks like pic related
heighten your standards faggot

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how much willy milk can your willy shoot?
26 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>37780992
Not much at all, unless I nofap for over a week or two and then I can get a more porn style load goin
>>
>>37780992
How can I make it shoot like that? Mine just oozes out.
>>
>>37780992
Christ, that's more cum in one wank than I've wanked in my entire life. Alpha as fuck.

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I have access to a car, about two grand and a lot of booze. What will it take for me to get laid, tonight? I do not have any friends and I definitely don't know any girls. I'm tired of being sexually frustrated and lonely. Wat do?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>37780958
Throw a big party and put up flyers in facebook.
>>
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Invest the money in the stock market

Disregard women
>>
>>37781028
I live with my mom and I don't have a facebook

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>tfw you solve a decades old riddle that you weren't even sure had an answer
15 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>37781007
what killed the ship's crew at the end of Jurassic Park II.
>>
>>37781030
Idk, what? I've never seen the movie.
>>
>>37781039
Velociraptors.

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I'm ironically jelly...
57 posts and 10 images submitted.
>>
>>37780832
of whom? I see two people
>>
good god
Have some self respect, even if you are a fucking nigger you still don't deserve to be treated this way. No male should ever date land whales.
>>
it's always the fatest, ugliest women

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Hello, fellow robots, I have autism and my friends are bullying me because of it. What should I do about t? take my life?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
Take theirs
>>
>>37780813
Hej m8, nice swedish pepe.
>friends are bullying me
Well, first of all, if they bully you, they ain't your friends.
> what should i do? take my life?
that's stupid. try to ignore their shits at first. if you can't just make them clear that you hate that they call out your autism. If they are your friends, they'll understand it. If they keep bullying you, then act alpha and make them bite the dust.
>>
>>37780813

We're getting cuckad broder. Hjaelp! Do something about Swedish Cuckpolitics.

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>Thirsty Anon? They're really full, come drink as much as you want!~
How do you proceed?
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
How now, brown cow?
*gets slapped*
>>
>>37780917
excellent reddit post.
have an upboat.
>>
>>37780797
I have a massive lactation fetish.

So drink it all.

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>26
>Avenged sevenfold is still favorite band
>Runescape is still favorite game

Anyone else hit their peak maturity years ago?
9 posts and 4 images submitted.
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yeah, one of the "coolest" things to me is getting drunk and playing doom. pantera + slayer in background
>>
>>37780760
glad you can still enjoy runescape. way too much grinding for me, no games are that fun anymore :(
>>
>still listen to the same music I used to listen to while grinding in runescape to give myself flashbacks

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5E-t0UvrNT0
Music thread, get in here boys
43 posts and 18 images submitted.
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>>37780748
fucking ear rape quality
>>
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Who else /ambient/ here?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFFae6hqmqg
>>
>>37780794
Nah that's just the style of the composer.
His latest album is full of songs like that.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FU34aIUQqGM

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>Trying to completely eliminate my libido and sex drive
>Mfw day 5 of nofap

Any other anons try this?
17 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Are you stupid? Not fapping will only increase your libido
>>
>>37780715
I went 3 weeks without fapping had no urge then said fuck it its not like I'll go back to fapping more than 2 times a day again I still regret it. I fap everyday at least twice.
>>
>>37780715
I haven't fapped for a week now, don't feen any different

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>only two factors that matter when it comes to having a happy life are wealth and physical attractiveness

>have neither
29 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>37780714
>>only two factors that matter when it comes to having a happy life are wealth and physical attractiveness

Maybe for you, pleb
>>
>>37780773
What else matters? I'd love to know.
>>
>>37780773
>>37780887
>no reply
Exactly. You fucking putz.

> you get to send one person a message
> you have to ask them to come over (to help you, to chill, to get something for free)
> you cannot send them any messages after this, so sending them an outrageous offer which will probably result in them asking "are you kidding rn" will not work
> you cannot imply your life depends on it
> if the person doesn't come over in 2 hours the gunman will kill you

Who do you send a message and what do you send?
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>inb4 just kill me senpai
>>
Send it to Tyrone telling him I got dope and to come over because my car's dead
>>
>>37780703
>implying any of my friends are that reliable

Favorite examples of Chads absolutely ruining their own lives?

>Austin Jones, internet pop artist, charged with child porn over fans' explicit videos

>Jones, 24, of west suburban Bloomingdale, faces two felony counts of production of child pornography. Each count carries a mandatory minimum sentence of 15 years behind bars if convicted.

Looking through the newest comments, it's insane to think about how normies went from adoring, praising, and complimenting him - to their now constant death threats and calls for rape and assault on him. https://youtu.be/JmHWPCzIfW0
24 posts and 5 images submitted.
>>
Also, I've been copypasting this paragraph for maximum normie trolling:

This whole "Austin Jones Is A Pedophile" situation is a picture perfect example of normie hypocrisy. You remember how normies fully endorse spanking children as a means of punishment? Austin could have spanked his 14 year old daughter's bare buttcheeks for a half hour straight and the normies would all say "good on you, I got spankings as a kid, it raises discipline! Glad you put your hands on that girl's bare ass!" But instead, he asked a 14 year old girl to send a photo of her same bare buttcheeks, and now he's spending thirty years in prison for it, with countless normies spouting "put a bullet in his brain! Enjoy the prison rape! Hope you get beaten to death!" It's insanity.
>>
>>37780690
you make this fucking thread every single day can you kill yourself already jesus fucking CHRIST
>>
>>37780709
If you find a better example of a Chad ruining his life, I'll delete this thread and repost your example if you'd prefer that.


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