hey r9k what is this?
>>37615824
Look very slimy. Vomit maybe or old milk
>>37615868
keep trying r9k, i dont think slugs like to eat vomit or old milk
Went out for a couple of drinks the other day and at 2AM some older lady (around 50ish) approached me and boy did she want it.
I thought, fuck it and went for the puss, we ended up at my home (she even paid for the taxi, lol) and I fucked her raw for about an hour. Couldn't come myself but she sure seemed to enjoy it. Ate her out as well. I think she was clean, no funky smell or anything. Did I do good /r9k/?
Regards, roboto chump
>>37615820
describe please. race? social level (i.e. ghetto/trailer park, middle, upper class?)? did you get contact info?
>>37615820
>I think she was clean, no funky smell or anything.
Holy fucking shit go to the doctor you idiot
Does anyone eIse on here ever get envious of female sexuality?
l don't think l realIy want to be a woman, but l look at my dick and just wish l had a vagina sometimes. I hate having a refractory period. I realIy wish l could have multiple orgasms. Good sex and masturbation just seem so much more pleasurable for women it makes me deeply depressed... lt just feels like biology and my body have betrayed me.
>>37615810
Not realy
Statistically speaking you're not likely to amount to much besides a pretty fuckhole as a woman
In that regard they have my sympathy
>>37615810
By "envious" do you mean "horny?" Because yes.
>>37615810
Another way to think about it is that you wish you could be a hentai dude. Infinite stamina, infinite cum, no refractory period.
Robots,i need tips. I think she is interested in me,but...i dont know how to ask.
>girl is pretty
>would kill for her fucking cat.
you can't. it's not that easy. your best bet is to invite her over to watch a movie or something. but who are we kidding here, that probably won't happen. feel free to ask though, you never know.
who was camera?
(Also, why don't we go after lolcows like this anymore? We're way too focused on ourselves)
So anon, you paid us $300 for the hour to wrestle you and facesit? Anything else?
>>37615578
Yeah, we're gonna play Monopoly
Yeah, walk the fuck away you ugly fucking horses.
I would pound that ass harder than Lebron did the warriors tonight
The best girls don't talk
>>37615558
ideal posters don't post
Autistic girls are undatable
have your ever hired a dom prostitute?
full comic source or sage
I remember that doujin very well
>>37615452
Sauce?
Orignig
Well, I just got let go from my job that I have had for 7+ years. Was a summer only gig, and allowed me to not have to work during the school year. I made bank. Just got home from my last shift. What the fuck do I do now... Probably gonna go NEET for a few weeks and enjoy E3 I guess. What are some good locations to look for a job?
hmmm bread
>>37615340
>oh fuck, rape happened
>clearly if the passive voice is used, no one is at fault
>whatever can we doooo
is it actually possible to lose interest in "normal" porn?
It's been a week since i've started fapping to Nakani's doujins, good shit might i tell ya, but now i just can't get past half-chubs for 3D porn
it just seems seem really lame compared to a well-drawn doujin with ahegao and all that jazz, i just keep asking myself "why even bother with sex it none of the girls react like this?" and it instantly demolishes my project of a boner
have i drowned in the 2D>3D meme?
is this the path to wizardhood?
so many questions, so little answers.
Do NoFap for 2 months, I was in a similar boat when regular porn wouldn't do anything, summer happened, next thing I know i have an erection the entire first day of school. ITS HARD I KNOW, but ssooo worth it!
>>37615308
Pretty much answered your own questions.
Sadly women will never be what we want them to be so we delve into the waifu fagging and 2D porn only world.
Honestly wouldnt have it any other way.
i'm seeing a lot of "robots" on here posting tinder convos with pretty hot girls. I'm a pretty attractive guy but i get zero matches. what kind of pictures are you guys using? I feel like car selfies and other pictures like that scream "fucking loser," so whats the deal "robots"?
>be 10 years old
>in car, on road trip with parents
>have to fart but afraid to gross out parents
>finally get to hotel
>try to find a safe place to fart
>parents say we're gonna swim in the pool and hurry me into the change room
>decide I'll just fart in the pool
>swim to the bottom on the pool and let myself loose
>turns out it wasn't a fart
>force of the diarrhea rockets me out of the water into the air
>splash into the now brown water on my belly
>hear sirens as I see everyone trying to escape the smelly shitty water
>see clean up crew in hazmat suits enter the pool, but go away after they throw up into their gas masks
>see parents enter and yell "What the fuck, Anon!" before they throw up and leave
>tfw that was the last time I ever saw my parents again
>guy beside me is talking super loudly
>I say one small word
>teacher tells me to be quiet
Its been 12 years and I'm still pissed
Fuck you mrs. mackenzie. I hope you get run over, stupid bitch
>>37615274
>taking a test
>guy nexts to me whispers what the answer to number 3 is
>without even having any time to react the teacher quickly gets up, takes both of our tests, and gives us a 0
burn in hell Ethan
>>37615274
> Doing jeapardy game for science class
> My group is getting fucked but then I get a chance to carry us to victory
> "Group Anon, why doesn't the change in distance from the sun during the year impact the seasons?"
> I fucking got this
> "Because the distance is already so large that the change doesn't have a measurable impact on the seasons"
> "Hmm that's not quite what I want..."
> My answer was the one word for word from the textbook
> "Group Cunt, do you have an answer?"
> "Well, it's like driving a long trip and finding out you have to go a few blocks further."
> "Good job!"
> Get fucked out of victory because the teacher preferred an anecdote the to the scientific answer
Fuck you Mrs. Angel, I've never been so angered by such a minor slight in my life.
>teach has problem with everything I do
>day 1 hates me
>get nothing but Cs on papers
>graded down for basically nothing
>get Lit grad student to write my freshman-level paper
>guaranteed A work
>still get C
>marked down on not wording phrases the way she wants them and on the correct use of commas
>took it up with the department head and now she doesn't work there anymore
Once you're not in elementary school this gets a lot easier