Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 35. page

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>Wake up
>you have the body and confidence of Chad

What do you do?

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>be 20
>every day more females my age lose their virginity
>there will be virtually no female virgins left in my age-range within a few years

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The next routine is the most powerful I have. It's something I make sure to use with every girl I talk to because it hits each positive component of The Vibe. It's the "I want to break up with you" routine.The best time to do it is about 5-10 minutes into the interaction, after you've already established stable conversation.

First, set up the routine by asking a question that shows how you and your target are different. Because I like cats and most girls like dogs, I ask a girl, out of the blue, "Do you like cats or dogs?" If she likes cats like I do, I postpone the routine. But if she says dogs (most do), I appear disappointed and say, "Oh, really. That's not good because I really like cats." Then I begin the routine: "I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that I don't think it's going to work out between us. We're going to have to break up." Have a disappointed look on your face.

The average response will be laughter, but sometimes the girl starts role-playing as your newly-dumped girlfriend. She'll say, "Oh, no, how am I going to go on with life?" You'll continue: "I know it will be very hard for you to move on because it will be impossible to find a guy like me, but I'm sure as the years go by, there may be a guy who is a suitable replacement." Another thing you can say is, "I know we had a lot of good times together, so this really wasn't an easy decision, but I know for me it's the right thing to do." Then, once you've passed the role-playing peak,hit her with the good news: "But then there's the good news.Yesterday I saved a lot of money on my car insurance." If any one routine defines my game, this is it-optimized over years of practice. I can't stress how important it is to include this in your game.

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>on a date with a girl
>she fucking checks her phone while I'm talking to her

I don't want to judge because as a guy I have ridiculous obsessions that I'm sure women find revolting, but shit, this is just plain rude. I don't bust out my 3DS they're talking to me.

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>tfw cut my hair
>never realized i was that ugly before
reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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Why is fate so unfair guys?

I'm healthy for the most part, but I'm an asshole with no redeemable qualities. I am desperate to die, but it seems like that's not going to happen without me doing it myself.

At the same time, babies are constantly born with congenital heart disease. Children get brain cancer, leukemia, get blown up by terrorists.

There are plenty of people like me and worse out there, lurking and living healthy lives, while innocent children die constantly.

Why is life so cruel?

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>23
>Broke Uni student
>Live with my parents
>Had to move out my own fucking room because relatives had to evacuate to get away from the hurricane so I'm sleeping on the couch in the living room
>My job fucking sucks and doesn't pay me enough so I'm eventually going to go bankrupt from my bills and Uni expenses
>Can't get a new job because no other place will work around my full time student schedule
>Possibly losing my hair
>Currently failing a class because Barnes and Noble didnt ship my fucking book even though I ordered it a week ago
>Going to fail Spanish 3 because I dont get this fucking language
>No girls will date me
>Can't talk to people
>Broke all the fucking time
>Lost my health insurance as a result of turning 23 and can't afford another

I dont care if anyone reads this. I just had to write it down. I don't know if I can take this anymore. What was supposed to be the best years of my life is just constant stress and disappointment.

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Starting to have doubts about staying with my girlfriend. She is pretty clingy, has trouble displaying emotion, and overall I've just been feeling like we don't match up all to well. I knew here long before we starting date, 5+ years. We have a lot of things in common like, vidya, music, hobbies, and social circle. It seems like a god sent to have someone so relatable and seemingly perfect in my grasp. On the other hand ever since we started living together, I can't ignore my gut feeling that this relationship isn't going to work because of our conflicting personalities. Above everything. I don't feeling like I could do better than her because I'm a robot.

Am I being to greedy? Do you think the feelings are going to pass?

inb4 normal fag chad gtfo

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Pic related, why do they do it?

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Can you get more comfy game? It's not possible

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>wearing diaper
>playing Minecraft in VR
Is there anything than a thicc diaper and video games?

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Robot, would you open up your home to take in fellow Texas and Floridian Robots affected by the hurricanes there?

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John 6
28 Then said they unto him, What shall we do, that we might work the works of God?
29 Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.
30 They said therefore unto him, What sign shewest thou then, that we may see, and believe thee? what dost thou work?
31 Our fathers did eat manna in the desert; as it is written, He gave them bread from heaven to eat.
32 Then Jesus said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Moses gave you not that bread from heaven; but my Father giveth you the true bread from heaven.
33 For the bread of God is he which cometh down from heaven, and giveth life unto the world.
34 Then said they unto him, Lord, evermore give us this bread
35 And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst.
36 But I said unto you, That ye also have seen me, and believe not.
37 All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out.
38 For I came down from heaven, not to do mine own will, but the will of him that sent me.
39 And this is the Father's will which hath sent me, that of all which he hath given me I should lose nothing, but should raise it up again at the last day.
40 And this is the will of him that sent me, that every one which seeth the Son, and believeth on him, may have everlasting life: and I will raise him up at the last day

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>listening to some classmates conversations
>"anon is so creepy, I'm afraid of him"
>"lmao anon has such an gigantic weird head"
>"anon is such a loser"

these came from 3 different girls

I think they don't knew I heard it, but how can girls be so cruel?

I didn't do nothing to them, why do they have to insult me?

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>tfw it's my birthday
>tfw nobody in my family said 'happy birthday' to me
this is pretty depressing