Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3493. page

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Holy fuck, it took me so long to understand what that meme meant. I'm so disconnected from normie hookup culture

>>37969116
I chuckled at the side description.

>It's okay to have sex with a guy on the first date, just make sure you say things like 'omg I never do this!!' so he knows you're a liar too.

The image macro is shite though.

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>>37969116
Roasties find humor in the relatable. Their minds aren't necessarily equipped for abstract thought, so hearing shit that sounds like what they do over the weekend or what they think of their """"friends"""" is funny to them. That's also why a lot of female humor that isn't "M U H V A G I N A" tends to be very mean spirited. This isn't speaking for all women of course, but generally speaking their primary humorous instinct has to do with things they know.

Think about it: is there any good absurdist comedy done by women?

>6'2''
>if you wanna have fun hmu

>use your own pics
>write about yourself
>swipe
>get girls

Why not do this instead?

Chad Bio

>I guess this is the part where I tell you I like some stuff, and some things. You probably also like some stuff, and maybe some things too. We might even like some of the same stuff, and possibly some of the same things. Yay!

>>37969063
I wouldn't worry about it my dude

>>37969093
Really? What makes you say that? Not that I don't believe you

>>37969108
Everyone deserves to be watched and analysed for data. You don't care about your rights so why should we?
You are nothing but cattle for us, a new generation of blind imbeciles who've been brought into apathy since childhood, even now you accept it because you're weak and the best part is there's a new lamb born every second, a newborn lamb to be conditioned to what we believe is right for everyone.
You will be controlled and We will have our new world.

OP if you just want somebody to talk to about your interests be honest. This board has no topic, you can just say you want to talk about death grips or maid dragon. Don't have to try making it into some weird forum game.

>>37969040
gtfo with your gay ass dragon maid

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>>37969040
I really like waka flocka flame and gucci mane. The beats just hit right for me almost everytime, its like its in tune with my soul with heavy rhytmic bass and it just gets me so fucking pumped! They rap about some insane outlandish gangster shit that I love for its comedic value.
Im very white and have a white collar job and as soon as that sort of music comes on I cant help myself and start raping the lyrics normally and start boping and doing their stupid moves and shit but its just so fun I cant help myself. Black people love me and ive been able to do a lot of drugs because of it lmao

>>37968981
Lol XD its funny cause porn

>>37968981
She thinks she's too good for porn now.

>>37969707
Link?

I want to see what she says about this

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Because i don't remember my dreams it's hard for me to remember exactly what happened on each occasion but
>be me
>start dosing off on the living room couch
>my brother is nearby on his phone
>semi wake up and realize I fell asleep
>try to get up
>can't
>at this point i know what's going on and I'm just mad because i can't move
>try calling for my brother
>the only noise that comes out is a weak "eeehhhh"
>try again with all my energy to pronounce his name
>"eaaaahh"
>his name's Bryan
>i notice he looks at me like I'm moreso of some autistic man-child
>he gets up and leaves
>gradually i slowly regain my motor skills

Tl;dr
Sleep paralysis sucks and i hate it. Fuck you brain

>>37968961
I can once in one of these sleep shits, it's luke magic masturbating

>>37968961
Does anyone else although feel like they can't breathe during sleep paralysis?

>tfw actually slept over at someone's at I couldn't breathe or move and started whimpering
>I remember them waking up and staring at me in concern

Kinda embarrassing desu

Very much so
Except I'm not envious of child birth, just good sex

Menstruation is probably annoying. If I want to put things inside myself there's still the butt. What more do you need?

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>>37968939
>>37968971
>tfw these two will never commit suicide so your posting experience is better

>>37968916
Druggies claim to be in immense pain (despite obviously not) and ask for tons of pills. And instead of asking for anything specifically just tell the doctor what you said here and ask if there's anything he can prescribe you for your anxiety in a small quantity.

>>37968916
Try to avoid specifically namedropping drugs, especially stuff like benzos. This will get you labelled a drug-seeker pretty much every time. Just mention as you have here you need something to help you sleep occasionally.

>>37968916
Explain that your consistent insomnia is giving you heightened anxiety and panic attacks more than usual. You also may be able to get just a weeks worth if you complain of insomnia but want to reset your body clock because you're out of sync.

Eitherway you should at least be able to get something to help you sleep.

6.99 for a value meal
6.99 for a value meal

>>37968895
>internet nostalgia
>posts this trash
10/10 OP

>>37968895
Here's a llama there's a llama and another little llama something something something something llama llama duck

So cute haha xD

>>37968853
>those pale chicken legs
no thx

>>37968907
>those pale chicken legs

Yes please

>>37968813
>Is college bullshit?
depends
there's a lot of factors

it can be bullshit
it can also be a great experience that sets you on a track to be successful in life

>>37968813
Not if you know what to do there (something you're good at and enjoy and can forge a career out of)

It is if you're a robot. Because college without networking is a waste of your time. Normies go to parties, meet people, join frats, make connections. That's the real value of college, it puts you in contact with people who can get you a job. If you spend all your time just studying and getting good grades you've wasted your money and time to get a piece of paper that's essentially worthless on its own.

>>37968708
What do? Do laundry. You want to make a good impression on your first day by wearing clean clothes. Take some extra time in the morning to make sure your are as clean as possible, and don't smell bad.

Maybe review some grooming tips from the 1940's : https://archive.org/details/HowtoBeW1949

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>>37968708
You'll get used to it Its not so bad after awhile.
I work a job that requires me to talk to people a lot .
I'm still a fucking autist but I've learned how to fake talking to people and acting normal.
As soon as I'm out of work though its back to the same old autist shit.
went to a family gathering today legit just sat in a corner by myself.
people came up and tried to talk to me and I gave genuine response but I'm just no good at talking to people.
they would ask me about school or work then I'd respond it would get really silent then they would just walk away.

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>>37968761
I debated trying the whole wearing a mask thing but I'm not sure how to do it. I try to tell myself I'm this person I'm not, but then I overthink why that's bullshit.

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>>37968697
Did better than me my dude, I can barely last 6 hours.

Made it to day 4, went outside, saw a horse and stared at her ass. Went home and masturbated to normal porn, before I would have done something stupid

>get a job
>easiest nofap of my life
I have to actually make time in my schedule to wank now. Ain't got free time to just stroke my dick whenever I'm bored, only have so many free hours in a day and can't spend half of them tugging my wiener like the good old NEET days.

>>37968681
You already a basic bitch if you use the word "worship" about any part of a woman

>>37968696
>basic bitch
kek that doesn't mean what you think it means.

>>37968681
girls like having their feet rubbed so just go from there

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>>37968655
>you fell for the give up porn meme

Just start jacking off again anon solves all of my tfw no gf problems.

>>37968712
idk man, I don't wanna go back to watching porn either. I mean i do, but I don't. As soon as I nut i'll immediately be overwhelmed with guilt and misery for having failed to uphold my own commitment.

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>>37968778
then it seems you're only option is to get a gf. either that or wallow in you're tfw no gf feels.