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How do you DATE normalfags? Sex is easy (am legit girl), but I'm too much of a loser to talk about normal things, don't have social media, listen to metal while they usually don't, don't have a life. Like what do I do? I look like a normie, but I'm not one.
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>>38012895
No John, you are the normies
fukthebot
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>>38012895
Please fuck off with your fake problems. All this board has been lately is a bunch of stupid faggot normies complaining "o no I don't have things in common muh robot status" like you think this is some kind of group you should be proud to be a part of. Leave this board, please. Never come back.
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>>38012895
kill yourself subhuman roastie garbage
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Too slow roach
You'll never defeat me!
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>>38012888
Good morning, sociojak
Nice triple digits buddy
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>>38012888
*dodges you*
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>>38012901
Hello roach.
>>38012902
Hehe, That's what you think pawn
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just got rejected by cutie asian girl employee at subwayand not one of those ugly faced, chestless,no-ass asian girls
>a solid 8 or 9/10 nice perky tits, tight little ass, fun size with a really cute voice.
I DONT THINK IM GONNA MAKE IT SENPAI
15 Posts / 1 Images
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obviously you need to green text you goddamn fag
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>>38012885
did you try to ask out a fast food worker at work?
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>>38012885
kek I bet you think she was being nice to you just to be nice and not because she's obligated to.
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>tfw Mommy spanks me for arriving to work 20 seconds late
does anyone else love their boss?
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>>38012858
What anime is this? Originaleee
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>implying this actually happened
If it did I want to apply wtf anon
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>>38013094
The "Monogatori" series.
I don't know the order the series is in because Crunchyroll decided not to upload them in order when I still had an account.
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>don't self insert as the girl
>feel lonely and realise a girl hasn't and will never do this to my cock
>get an intense yearning for companionship that can't be fulfilled
>my dick starts to go soft
>quickly self insert as the girl instead
>imagine myself sucking the cock
>imagine the feel the cock on my lips instead of the girls lips on my cock
>feel less lonely
>dick gets hard again
>still think the girl is beautiful after I cum and wish we could have a moment like this together
Its strange, when I go outside I'm never attracted to men. Instead I find myself staring at girls, seeing how they walk, smelling the air as they pass me it usually ruins my day because I'm left thinking about what I can't have.
How do I stop letting this distract me and stop these faggot thoughts seeping into my head? I've tried nofap but even after the first week it just becomes unbearable to do anything because I'm constantly thinking about cumming
10 Posts / 2 Images
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>>38012827
find ugly gf. then slowly progress towards prettier ones. you have to learn to love uggos first
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>>38012827
It's autogynephilia, anon. Either stop watching porn or transition.
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I don't think its a big deal, self inserting as the girl is fun and different from the usual imagining of pounding away at holes.
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How do I suck cock? I legitimately don't know.
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Suck on your thumb
It's like that but bigger typically.
It's really not complicated.
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>>38012792
Like a cucumber.
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>>38012801
you don't suck on cucumbers lol
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ITT: redflags
>he doesn't use Oxford commas
>he uses dashes instead of slashes when writing out dates
>he spells "a while" "awhile"
>he uses ellipses or exclamation marks outside of dialogue
>he writes numbers that contain only one word in numerals
>he believes conjunctions can't start a sentence
>he overuses colons, semicolons, and em dashes for stylistic purposes
>he doesn't use lower case letters and periods when writing out a.m. and p.m.
>he uses food analogies in his prose unironically
>he has EVER used a run-on sentence or comma splice (don't even let him buy you a drink)
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>>38012751
Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma?
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I do most of these things, are you mad?
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>>38012751
It is 12:31 pm.
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Hang in there wagie, only two more days left!
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Fuck you my job is hard, I don't even care, this is my first week after months of being neet, I just want weed already
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>>38012723
I work from home, neetie. I can work whenever I want and I earn more than double your neetbux. I can also still collect welfare with the government being none the wiser.
When are you going to step up to my level?
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>>38012723
Yeah, two more days till I'm done with that fucking garbage job HA
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I lost weight, why do I have loose skin? I eat right, I exercise correctly. Why am I still hideous? I fixed myself. Why?
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How much weight did you lose? Is the loose skin really that bad?
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>>38012780
Went from 120KG to 70KG.
Yes it is fucking hideous, I look like in melting.
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This is my biggest fear if I ever get around to losing weight.
Are you built? Did you lose it quick?
I'm hoping that by building muscle and losing weight gradually I'll be able to avoid this fate worse than death
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>ctrl-f
>no party rockers thread
PARTY ROCKERS IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT WE JUST WANNA HAVE A GOOD TIME
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IT'S "EVERY ROBOT HAVE A GOOD TIME"
REEEEEE
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>>38012694
WE GONNA MAKE YOU LOSE YOUR MIND
WE JUST WANNA SEE YA SHAKE THAT SHAKE THAT
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>>38012694
I get told i look like redfoo a lot. Feela bad man.
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Its my fucking birthday today anon, why tf am i on R9K. Im pathetic. Now... what did u guys do on your birthday this year or last year? Make me feel better.
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Went out for drinks with some friends and then my friend puked over my balcony.
Fun times.
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>>38012660
I took a walk at midnight to one of my favorite places. It was pretty fun, and made up for everything that didn't feel right that day.
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>>38012660
Happy Birthday Anon. I too spent my birthday this year alone on /r9k/.
Nobody called or texted. I had no presents or cake. Just like every day, I am alone.
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Ask someone who went from dateless handholdless kissless virgin robot to just virgin (which will hopefully change in 2 days when we meet again) in one night anything.
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>>38012630
Congrats. I wouldn't rush it though. Seriously, if you have a good thing going, keep it steady instead of rushing into it. Keeps her interested and makes her feel like you didn't just do it all to get in her pants
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>>38012630
Why the fuck are you on my board half-robot?
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>>38012734
she's meeting my parents next week, but it's only because she wants to learn stickshift and my stick truck is parked at their house
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>meet qt pure virgin like /r9k/ suggests
>she's socially awkward
>but she's sort of sweet
>after 3rd date try for sex
>"I'm waiting until marriage I hope you understand"
>mfw
You guys have terrible taste
26 Posts / 1 Images
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>>38012569
> he fell for the virgin meme
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>>38012569
How is she supposed to stay a pure virgin if she's willing to put out before she's married? She'd become Chad's used goods very quickly.
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>>38012569
>being a sex-obsessed pervert
Waiting till marriage is a good thing, fuck you.
I eat literally nothing but bread.
I eat three loaves of bread a day, and it's real cheap too.
>buy my bread from save-a-lot (white trash grocery store)
>one loaf of cheap bread is $0.99
>decide to start buying three loafs a day, since the bread is right by the registers
>every single day for the past four months, i have bought three loafs of bread, no more, no less
>there's a new girl that's worked for three days
>do my daily bread shopping today
>go to pay for my meal
>girl says "why do you buy bread every day?"
>OH SHIT
>i have never spoken to a cashier before at this store
>"maybe we can talk over a loaf?" in a broken voice void of confidence
>internal cringe of a thousand english class speeches
>she has the most disgusted look on her face, dots her eyes down to my new balances, to my kekistan hoodie, and ends her optical evaluation at my Make America Great Again hat
>she says "l-let me go get my manager"
>nope the fuck out
What the fuck do I do? The other store makes you pay $2.50 for a loaf.
I don't have the money for that shit. But I don't want to be BTFO by the store manager either.
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>>38012564
ever thought about making bread yourself? its easy, costs literally nothing and tastes way better
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>>38012584
How would I do that?
I don't have a stove or oven.
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>>38012584
ive done the math and it costs about the same as cheap store white bread. its a lot nicer of course
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how do i gape my ass for my bf
he sticks it in my ass and nothing happens when he pulls out
pls halp
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Are you a guy?
Or are you a girl?
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What should happen? Shouldn't he just fuck you there and take it out when he has had his relief
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>>38012629
girl
>>38012670
its his fetish