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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 335. page

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>On holiday with parents
>Already masturbated 3 times
What the fuck is wrong with me?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39489677
Dude, you already fucked up no fap September? It's not even the fucking 4th yet!
>>
What's wrong with that? Masturbate proudly with your head held high, OP.
>>
>on holiday
britfag detected

also, underage b&

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>Anon why are my bits so much bigger than yours? My willy is twice the size of your willy!
20 posts and 10 images submitted.
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That shit is 3 or 4 times bigger
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>>39489629
because i have a measly 4 inches anon. Its, uh, sctually oretty embarrasing that you found out.
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>>39489629
>you will never frot with that delicious cock

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>set a date with a girl I've been talking for a couple weeks
>after a couple of small talk decide to kiss her
>mfw she just put her tongue out and doesn't move it
>it literally looks like I'm trying to kiss a dead fish with a tongue
at least I was fucking her 2 hours later
31 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>39489615
how old was her?
>>
>never had tinder
>the end
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>>39489615
>post your tinder stories
>get tinder
>be on it for almost a year
>have meaningless conversations with those few that swipe me right that lead nowhere
>end

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Would you date a girl who is 3/10 in terms of looks (in your opinion) but has a 10/10 personality (in your opinion)?
71 posts and 7 images submitted.
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Such a girl is probably too good for you. She was too good for me.
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>>39489604
Of fucking course I would you retard
I'd be busy stuffing her with kids
This isn't even a question

Everyone's a 3/10 when they're 65 anyway.
>>
>>39489604
No one who answers no to this question belongs here.

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NO TALKIE BEFORE I'VE HAD MY FROGGlE
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>39489589
Please anon, wait a little longer before making this thread. I haven't finished my tea yet
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>>39489589
Never understood people who "have" to have a cup of coffee in the morning before they can "do" anything.
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>>39489650
They're usually over tired from their job, having got home in the late afternoon and stayed up too late, trying to make the most of the few hours that they have to themselves. I was hardly ever tired before I started working, but after getting a job, I pretty much have to have a coffee in the morning so that I don't fall asleep on the job. Maybe I should just start going to bed earlier.

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with /sonic/ ofc
52 posts and 16 images submitted.
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>>39489581
Stop starting this thread with a fucking thumbnail.
This isn't a meme and you're not going to force it into existence.
>>
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>>39489600
watch me


onig
>>
How do I know if I'm an INFP or a very depressed INTJ/INTP?

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any aussies kickin about tonight?

how was your weekend lads?
28 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>39489512
it was dank asf my dude
spent weekenb up in thredbo was dOPE
>>
>tfw nearing summer
>tfw get depressed usually from october until about february

happened the last 3 years lads, not looking forward to it desu
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>>39489559
summer sux ay lad

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Any Robots ever been to Jail or prison?
>Jail or Prison?
>For how long?
>Why?
>What was it like?
21 posts and 3 images submitted.
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My younger brother was.
He's not a robot if anything hardcore degenerate normie.
He told me stories want me to share?

Not talking sissy UK or Norway I'm talkin murrikkkah!
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>>39489420
Sure lmao. Go for it
originalll
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>>39489403
Spent a night in a jail for being drunk and not knowing how to get hime. Sobered up and went home next day. Got a slap on the wrist

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How /r9k/ become so fucking pathetic?
What about originality attracted betas and virgins?
6 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>39489391
>board basically meant for original greentext stories
>people draw upon their experiences for content
>userbase is depressed and lonely
>it snowballs
>here we are
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When /r9k/ was first created, it was just a slower version of /b/ with no memes. For a brief moment, serious discussion could be had on 4chan. Within 4chan however was a section of the userbase that needed an outlet to bitch about their miserable lives. Having no board to call their own, they were a people without a country, and so once /r9k/ was made they settled here, having nowhere else to go. Eventually serious discussion more or less ceased and was replaced by frogposting and memes.

I think we're seeing the same phenomenon repeat itself today with the incessant trapposting - as there exists no /trap/ board, the section of 4chan's userbase that's into feminine penis have to go somewhere, and /r9k/ seems to be the board of least resistance. It remains to be seen if /r9k/ will undergo a second transformation into a de facto gay/trap board as the frogposters and feelfags fade into history, just as the gentlemen of old /r9k/ did.
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>>39489553
>I think we're seeing the same phenomenon repeat itself today with the incessant trapposting - as there exists no /trap/ board, the section of 4chan's userbase that's into feminine penis have to go somewhere, and /r9k/ seems to be the board of least resistance. It remains to be seen if /r9k/ will undergo a second transformation into a de facto gay/trap board as the frogposters and feelfags fade into history, just as the gentlemen of old /r9k/ did.


That is BS. /lgbt/ exists after all.

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>the absolute state of modern "sexually liberated" women
23 posts and 8 images submitted.
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This is fucking disgusting desu
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>>39489371
Give me a sauce please, and no funny links alright
>>
can you imagine the smell

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until I was 24 I never touched a girl but they weren't mean to me either, found me funny but ignored me... had a 8/10 female friend for 3+ years then (not exactly friend zoned, just a friend)

last months of university I meet 8/10 cute girl at birthday party of another female friend ("your weird anon come to my party, we need to find you a gf")

get hooked up immediately, 3 months of ultra cringe rehabilitation into social life happen, first kiss after 6 weeks (she almost quit as it was that bad), first sex a lot later (like a retarded rabbit)

took me another 2-3 years to start trusting people and stop talking about insane shit all the time, old friends from school still greet me with "hey anon, funny you didn't murder anyone yet"

still to this day I fall into this creepy attitude when cute girls surround me but they don't notice anymore, have courage now towards all girls, could have banged 2 5-6/10 girls who hit on me since, did not obviously

gf is loyal for 6+ years now, didn't become fat or pregnant but wants to move together, come to her friends regularly for social training, had sex around 640 times until today

have been sick and weak for most of those years but started boxing (still zero muscle gain) and somehow became a lot more attractive (better posture I guess), easily 7/10 appearance now

I tried tinder once and really elite girls liked me but immediately stopped conversation after few seconds of chat

once gf threatened to quit if I didn't better up (get some shit together), roughened up back then and felt like I could get another one in < 1 year if needed

still have 3+TB of porn stockpiled if bad things should happen, gf knows about this, finds it ok and watched some with me...

what am I ? is this some kind of chad/beta limbo ?
15 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39489324
anon I think you are a beta
you are just socially retarded
only thing you can do is pretend you don't give a shit about anyone and treat all the hot girls like shit.
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>>39489324
You are a patched up robot. Life happened to you, nothing wrong with that.
>>
what a weird ass blogpost

i almost thought this was ironic for a while

I'm a national Bolshevik. Communism would be a good ideology for us unemployed robots to follow if we pair it up with nationalism. Who's with me?
81 posts and 7 images submitted.
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>>39489290
Fuck off leftypol, r9k and 4chan in general is National Socialist
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>>39489290
Good commie is a dead commie.
Most retarded system there is. Even Nazis are better because they at least do not hide that they want genocide.
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>>39489290
Why be national communist if you can be national socialist?

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Conservatives want to take away our NEETbux.

If you have right wing opinions you're not a robot.
37 posts and 10 images submitted.
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>>39489226
just move to a half decent country Denmark where conservatism is considered socialism but only for the natives of the country
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If we lived in a good right-wing society then we wouldn't be robots in the first place.
>>
NEETbux are pretty much ingrained in the culture and society of my country so they'll probably never go away, at least not in my lifetime.

Just discovered that I'm 5'8
54 posts and 13 images submitted.
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>>39489220
is there some way to measure myself at home?
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>>39489300
With a measuring tape

Original
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>>39489305
my measuring tape isn't long enough though and i don't know how to place it to measure myself properly

>"Why didn't you dress up anon?"
26 posts and 6 images submitted.
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>>39489200
>I just came from the gym, i wouldnt want to be all sweaty in a costume
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>>39489200
>Where are all the other guys?
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>>39489200
Please no, my worst nightmare, this room would be the very definition of mental abuse. Let me attach to some guy that will shield me from these harpies.


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