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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3281. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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Who /poser/ here

>go on r9k
>non-virgin
>shitpost on /fit/
>can only bench 2 plates
>go on /o/
>no licence
>shitpost on /ck/
>can't cook
>shitpost on /v/
>don't play video games
>shitpost on /sp/
>don't watch sports
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
>only bench 2pl8
That's good though or do you not know what 2pl8 is?
>>
>>38081487
I do, I'm just insecure about it given my other stats
>>
>>38081499
A good bunch of /fit/ can't do 2pl8 bench and if that's your weakest maybe you truly do belong on /fit/ and you're not as big of a poser as you think.

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How in the fuck is liking this gay?
7 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
PPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

FFFFFTTTSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHH
>>
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>no semen demon bf
>>
>>38081419
DAMN PUTIN LOOKS LIKE THAT?

Has anyone sent a dick pic to a girl and have it worked? I got this girls number off tinder and I'm trying to escalate and sent this. Doing it out the blue would be weird right?
17 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
>shaved armpits
wow you're a fucking faggot
>>
sending dick is the last thing you want to do you mongoloid
>>
soo o o fucking gay

That's right! She's about to get not ONE but TWO Masters, a MINOR, and a Phd while you losers are jacking off to chinese cartoons. You mad?
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
>>38081264
What a waste of perfectly usable womb.
>>
>>38081264
Why is she wearing a hijab
>>
>>38081264

>You mad?

Not at all. I did five degrees, three in STEM.

>still unemployed.

I had a dream last night that I could suck my own dick. I tried it this morning and all that happened was I pulled a muscle.
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
Also, enjoy the wojak I made
>>
>>38081043
its good i saved it
>>
gOOd wojack

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>tfw you have resisted the succubus for your entire life
Not much longer until wizardhood guys. How are my fellow wizard apprentices doing?
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
>>
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>>38081013
I'm not sure how good this life was supposed to be
>>
>>38081013
If they last time I had sex was 3 years ago, does it mean if I wait 27 more years I'll be a wizard?
>>
>>38081158
No it means you are a 30-year old virgin. Having sex disqualifies you from wizardship, newfag.

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Every robot should watch this. Most of you can probably relate

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrEvCKgV0gM
25 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
bump please watch
>>
>>38080934
This is so true...but also hard at the same time
>>
>>38080934
If I wanted advice, I'd go to /adv/.
I hope you become majorly disfigured in a terrible accident.

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>"Anon you bastard, look what you did to me! I can't believe I let a loser white boy like you knock me up...you're gonna make it up to me! You can start by rubbing my feet!"
What do you do?
20 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
>>38080769
That's a disgusting belly button.
>>
>tfw no pregnant shadow gf
>>
>tfw no pregnant cocoa gf

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I CLEANED MY PC AND NOW IT'S LESS LOUD THAN BEFORE!
12 posts and 3 images submitted.
>>
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>my PC makes weird noises that sound like a barber's razor
>>
teach me your ways please i need your help
>>
>less loud than before

How the fuck do people this stupid manage to breathe?

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Hangover Edition, I drank from dawn until midnight yesterday and now all I want is the sweet release of death.
16 posts and 3 images submitted.
>>
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>>38080699
are you also /skinnyfat? that would make things worse... skinnyfat lifestyle and alcoholism usually coexist
>>
>>38081176
Yeah. I was bordering on actually chubby at one point when I was binge drinking daily, but I slowed down and the weight left almost immediately. Amazing how much weight/alcohol correlate.
>>
What do you call it when you have no problem not drinking, but once you have one drink you can't stop until you pass out. That's not alcoholism right? Just a lack of self-control

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why do they have seizures when they get tokens??
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
>>38080674
It's an involuntary response to getting money from betas, kind of like how your dog wags his tail when you give him attention.
>>
It's the new way to scream "oooo fuhck yuh, oooooooOoooo fuck yuh oo daddy my pussy feels SoOoo FUcking good"
>>
ive seen guys say that you shouldnt watch cams if you cant tip

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>first day of normie jobhood ended
>all I can think about is how much I don't want to go back to work
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
Give it some time once you see your paycheck you stop caring how shit the actual work is.
>>
>>38080606
>People say this every time
>My paychecks are always absolute garbage
yay 150 dollars for 2 weeks of work im so thrilled
>>
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Same, but I've been in mine for two months and I'll have to go back next time day after tomorrow.
I'd be happy toiling away if I didn't have to deal with my coworkers and how they immediately go talking shit behind your back when you make a single stumble in social interaction or stay quiet and concentrated to working a bit too long for them.

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What is the most subhuman race and why is it the Koreans?
16 posts and 2 images submitted.
>>
>>38080558
Whatever you claim to be.
>>
>>38080558
Tiny little penises.
>>
>>38080558
are you the jap from /bant/?

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I just drank two litres of Coke syrup in ten minutes

Ama
14 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
What does diabetic shock feel like??
>>
>>38080575
Pretty bad desu
I've kept my chin on the toilet seat for about five minutes now
>>
Why only the syrup

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>person adds me on steam
>say they were "following" me for a while
>they say "I'm sorry I can't do this"
What did they mean by this?
9 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
>>38080515
forgot to add that they removed me after saying "I'm sorry I can't do this"
Have another doggo.
>>
Erotic role-playing over instant messenger.
>>
>>38080515

They were going to pretend to be a girl and scam you into buying them games, but then changed their mind.


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