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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3206. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

what does kissing a girl feels like?
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
Place your lips against a girl's lips. That's exactly how it feels.
>>
It feels like a bag of sand originally
>>
I don't remember except it is wet and feels like it goes on for too long

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>was socially awkward for 12 years
>saw opportunities in making new friends
>steadily progressed to become a better person
>never been happier
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38121743
you're not a allowed to be happy when browsing this board
>>
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>>38121743
good job anon proud of you, b u m p

>be me
>horny 12 year old
>like this girl
>we end up rp'ing
>most sexual experience with another human being i've ever had
>catch hella feels
>we keep talking for months
>she then asks if i wanna trade nudes
>godhasblessedme.jpg
>a bit spooked because i've never send a nude before
>insist that she go first
>she refuses
>this goes on for a while
>one night, 11pm, tired and horny
>girl sends panty shot
>become happy as fuck and forget that that's not what we agreed on
>send my dick pic like a tard
>"wow anon its so big!"
>become happy as fuck, thinking im cool and she'll send nudes now
>never happens
>she kinda disconnects with me, talking to me less and more to other dudes
>feel a little sad but blow it off and keep my love for her strong
>then she catches feels for some other chad anon
>internally flip my shit but stay calm and dont lash out on her bc im beta
>friend says to me "bro theres no hope you need to drop her ass"
>proceed to do so
>high impact angry violence towards my keyboard
>stop talking to her, and dont talk to any girls for a year
>afterward i go online more and start looking for girls to talk to on an mc server
>rp with a ton of girls which i end up enjoying the fuck out of regardless of friends calling me beta cuck
>get nudes from some random slut
>GODREALLYBLESSEDMETHISTIME.exe
>things went uphill from there
>got more nudes from more girls
>fuckboy extraordinaire
>friend suggests I stop and get a gf
>somehow land that shit the next day
>3 months in and i find out she was cheating on me
>literally do not care because i had way more feels for this 12/10 qt aussie girl
>says she really likes me too, more than her bf
>fuckyes.avi
>dump fat bitch and roam around, fuckboy extraordinaire, waiting for 12/10 qt to break up with shit tier bf for me
>mfw went 0 - 100 via minecraft
>>
>>38122002
The most Norman fucking post I've read all day and I started at 1 pm of July 2nd

Leave this board, you are also probably underage

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>date chad
>break up
>get murdered

I thought females had magic powers to tell if someone was violent or creppy from their auras... Ehhh maybe next time roastie
40 posts and 9 images submitted.
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>>38121707
They choose to ignore this power if you're attractive.
>>
>>38121707
they have and they use this power to suck some violent alpha dick
>>
Story on this?

Or is it Bait?

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Was ian curtis a robot ? I
23 posts and 6 images submitted.
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he had a kid and a wife
>>
>>38121662
Wow so just because you have a wife and kid you can't be a robot? Fucking virgins I swear
>>
>>38121684
>Wow so just because you have a wife and kid you can't be a robot?
Uhm, yes

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Why do people with girlfriends watch p0rn?
19 posts and 3 images submitted.
>>
because you get tired of fucking the same chick
most girls are shit at sex anyways
porn is great because other women are actually attractive and there are no hoops to jump through
masturbating > sex
>>
>>38121552
t. virgin

hehjewewwehjew
>>
Real sex is emotional. Fapping is easier to get off on because you don't feel as awkward afterwards. Fantasies are easier than reality.

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>used up granny gave me her phone number as a """"tip"""""
I hate older women so fucking much
18 posts and 4 images submitted.
>>
Are you that knot poster
>>
>>38121482
At least someone desires you, anon
>>
>>38121562
its pretty fucking creepy when a woman who could practically be your mom does shit like that desu

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HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY BEFORE 17?
35 posts and 5 images submitted.
>>
>>38121458
HOW IS IT FUCKING POSSIBLE?
>>
It just NORMALLY happens that way, unless you have religious reasons not to, not that anyone young and hormonal puts that much feeling into religion; usually happens later when you've one foot out the door.
>>
>>38121458
Via statutory rape?

I think I might have premature ejaculation problem

>try to fap using my onahole
>can't last for more than 5 minutes unless I go really slowly and try to force myself not to cum
>actually feels too overwhelming and rushed compared to using a hand

I'm really worried, I can't imagine what it would feel like to put it inside a girl if I ever found one, I would probably explode just after putting it in.
10 posts and 1 images submitted.
>>
>>38121437
You're super lucky. My gf thinks something wrong with her because I couldn't cum if my life depended on it.

Always blue balls
>>
>>38121718
Well that's another bad extreme

What should be ideal time for man to cum?
>>
>>38122156
after the woman
because as always we exist to serve and pleasure women

dominant genre my ass

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THE WORKERS ARE GOOOOING HOOOOOME

THE WORKERS ARE GOOOOING HOOOOOME

THE WORKERS ARE GOOOOING HOOOOOME

THE WORKERS ARE GOOOOING HOOOOOME

THE WORKERS ARE GOOOOING HOOOOOME

(wagecucks BTFO)
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
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Jokes on you I got mondays and tuesdays off.
>>
>>38121459
That is very strange. I'd get Tuesday for the 4th but why Monday?
>>
>>38121488
Because I'm a liscenseless cuck so I asked to work weekends so I can get free rides to work from my pa. :v
Having to pay the neighbors $10 per ride adds up so I figured getting two free rides a week is worth it.

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>wake up
>feel like shit as usual but I'm actually looking forward to the day because I can do stuff
>get up and shower since I haven't had a shower in 5 days
>start thinking in the shower
>remember that I have no friends
>remember that I have no fun vidya to play
>remember that I have no car
>remember that I have no good food
>remember that there is nothing good to watch on kikeflix or jewtube
>remember that I live 30 miles away from the closest city
>only good thing is that I have lots of ice cream in my freezer
9 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>38121410
Is this the NEET endgame?
>>
>>38121579
a job wouldn't change it
I've been a wagecuck before and it's honestly much worse
>>
>>38121642
Do you have your own apartment?
Rural area or city?
If rural theres a ton of things you can do alone

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>you will never have enough money to make a rival mars colony to elon musk's
12 posts and 5 images submitted.
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>>38121401
tfw no Chihuahua fren :(
>>
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let's invest in finding a way to enter an alternative universe with qt 2D waifus instead
>>
>>38121401
"Son, you can do anything when you get a job. It's simple: All you need to do is show up, talk to the manager, stand up straight, look him in the eye, and give him a firm handshake."

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what type of underwear do you guys wear, for me its boxers. nothing rivals in in comfiness
25 posts and 7 images submitted.
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kirkland signature boxer briefs
it's the cottony equivalent of chunky autism sneakers
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>>38121318
My mom's panties desu
>>
>>38121318
Regular briefs or commando.

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>You want a turn yet, bro?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>38121317
ew stinky
>>
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Tfw a boy will never tease me with his cute feet
>>
>>38121403
Wait a second, that's not feet smell!
THERE'S A DEAD HOOKER IN THE SOFA

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>enters contest about being the most beautiful
>have ugly facial features, making her obviously not the most beautiful
>will probably win for "being brave"
Even when ugly they win
21 posts and 4 images submitted.
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Fuck women and their easy mode lives
>>
I'm gonna hurl. Why is this allowed? Why do we pretend like she isn't disgusting? I don't even hate women but fucking seriously this is JUST because she's a woman. Imagine if a fat dude, and by fat I mean morbidly obese, went into the equivalent of this. He'd be laughed out of admission.
>>
if you take away the moles, she's very good looking. she has really full, sexy lips that i never want to stop kissing, even with the moles.

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You love the freedom that my friend protected and gave you but you don't respect him? Fuck you NEET boi. It's people like you that take freedom for granted that don't know how many sacrifices are made everyday to protect it
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Is that a coffin conveyor belt?
>>
kek 4 less retards in this world
praise jebus
>>
>>38121313
Topkek I'm howling


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