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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3200. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

File: pepe be drinking.png (44KB, 500x362px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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who here /a/lchoholic?
Just woke up and already drunk
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
Get your shit together. You won't make it long living like that. Unless you're suicidal
Same, just drank half bottle of Chivas regal yesterday and want to kill myself
You're on the wrong board. Check'd anyways

My advice to all beta cucks on 4chan is simple.Grow a beard = get pucci.
28 posts and 5 images submitted.
if I had enough testosterone to grow a beard I wouldn't be in this mess
I grew a mustache instead but get no pucci
i'm 23 and have no facial hair. how am i supposed to grow a beard??

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Are you obligated to living in a big house if you make over $2000 a month?

What happens when you're rich, but you're content with living a 2 or 1 bedroom house? Will you be forced to live in a more pricey home or something?
17 posts and 3 images submitted.
2000 a month isnt that much

maybe enough for a condo
>$2000 a month
That's not a lot, right?
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you aren't...


If you guys are so desperate to be my bf, I will let you on one condition. I get to date all of you at once and get my own harem. You are under the presence of a goddess after all.
11 posts and 2 images submitted.
No one wants your worn out roastie, slag.

Kill yourself then get off my board.
Can i be your first boy friend?

can we fuck first?
Off yourself hag

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>tfw no effendi bf
12 posts and 7 images submitted.
I'm an effendi! Post your tube of lube and maybe i'll use it.
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>tfw no fundie gf

You are very persistent, I want a bf who knows what he wants. will you be my bf?

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>Reading your old conversations with her before she stopped responding
11 posts and 3 images submitted.
>geting out the car after saying your last good bye as she goes off to college and never hearing from her again
>"I love you, anon"
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>that retard that has nothing better to do with his time and reads old conversations you had with him
Stop being such an idiot.

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9 posts and 4 images submitted.
Anon. Hate does no you no good.It is folly like anger. And only leads to evil. Women are evil, but do not harbor that feeling of hatred because it pollutes you and makes you miserable.

Anon I promise you every woman will be judged and punished. There is a being who will repay everyone and bring back balance to this world through his judgement.

Pslams 37:8 Stop being angry! Turn from your rage! Do not lose your temper--it only leads to harm.
It's okay pal, 9th grade starts in a month ~
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I have the PERFECT album for you that literally bashes on women, sluts, lust, and religion.

One of my favorite albums from high school.


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Selfie days.
18 posts and 4 images submitted.
How much out of 10 would you recommend someone to start watching Steven universe?
Hi Connie.
Daily reminder that you should definitely try touching yourself.
3/10 tbqhwyforiginally

>ywn be part of a comfy cult
>ywn have a secret hideout where you meet with your cult friends
>ywn study forbidden tomes
>ywn summon demons through complicated rituals normies could never understand and bind them to your will
>ywn sacrifice a qt virgin in exchange for a succubus
>ywn cause chaos by releasing unholy and dark powers on the normies and laugh with your cult friends as you watch them struggle and suffer

Why does life have to be so boring?!
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
I don't think demon summoning cults are ever comfy, but how would you know that? You're just a weak minded normie like the rest of us
y not loser
The demons would drag your ass to hell too ya know.

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>tfw no kanin picking, tinikling dancing, tiyanak finding, manok chasing, aswang hunting, kabayo riding, carabao herding, baboy wrestling, duwende stomping, lechon roasting, lumpia cooking, pancit making, sinigang eating, forest loving, /r9k/ posting, qt filipina gf
8 posts and 3 images submitted.
Anon, she's a womanlet.
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>aswang hunting
She'll die
I miss the Mexichan poster, at least she was really hot.

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Is anybody else afraid of traps? That a man can be so emasculated. There's something deeply terrifying about it which is likely the source of homophobia throughout the world.
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
We all know you're gay anon
>>>/lgbt/ back to where you belong my main man
No cause I'm comfortable with my masculinity and it makes me hard knowing I can easily dominate any one of those fuccbois.
pretty easy to make a trap give me any child and i can make it so they turn into a trap later on just needs a lil trauma(rapes and exposure to gay shit)

ITT prove that your hometown is the best.
>Most attractive people
>Can find anything you want and travel across the city without a car
>Can actually be yourself here
128 posts and 33 images submitted.
My home town isn't the best. The only notable thing about my home town is that the walking dead is filmed here.
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Pretty much any European town will beat an american one. Even my hometown.

>Has history
>Includes comfy historic town center
>Still has everything you need from a city
>Streets are not in a grid pattern
>Can travel in a car without standing still at a trafic light every 10 seconds
>Don't even need to use a car because great bicycle infrastructure
>Starting to get homesick now so i'll stop
>New York
>fully cucked
>diverse but still segregated
>subway is broken
>commuter rail is broken
>smells like shit all the time
>cold, snowy, and windy in the winter
>hot, humid, and stagnant in the summer
>everyone is an asshole
>politics is so thoroughly corrupt it's laughable
>too expensive to live or eat
fuck New York, and I'm from there

>tfw you will never impregnate a thicc ebony goddess with your white seed
Why go on?
16 posts and 5 images submitted.
thats gross op, you gay
Stop encouraging bestiality.
There is hardly anything there. No "T H I C C XDDDDDD" at all. Fuck off.

How do you explain the book you're reading to a curious bystander without looking like a weirdo?

>you are at work reading a book on your lunch break
>co-worker asks you about the book you are reading

What kind of spoiler-free response would you give? Too long of a response you might bore them. Too short and they'll think you're bothered by them. The book also deserves to accurately described.

How do I explain Kororo without spoiling anything and not looking like a weirdo/weeaboo?!
11 posts and 4 images submitted.
>How do I explain Kororo without spoiling anything and not looking like a weirdo/weeaboo?!
1. you're not going to spoil anything because they're never going to read it, they hardly give a shit about the book itself, they're just asking because they're curious about why you're reading it.
2. just use general terms like "it's a japanese novel set in so-and-so where such-and-such happens". that's literally all you need to say. they'll ask you how you're liking it and you tell them whether it's bad, okay, or good. there
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explain this book

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Post your dick stats /r9k/, no truth stretching or pictures
7 inches
6.5 inches (Head is visibly girthier than the body; head is 7 inches)
Peach with a pink head (turns a darker pink when aroused)
>Average length flaccid
3 inches, really fluctuates
>Grower or shower
Definitely grower, my flaccid dick does fluctuate but usually to smaller sizes. If I ever show my dick to a girl I'll make sure it's erect first
Had a very loose circumcision when I was born (Do have a light circumcision scar) and my foreskin has kind of grown back somewhat since I was a baby, so I have a CI-3.5 foreskin level (http://www.restoringforeskin.org/coverage-index/CI-chart.htm)
>Testicle size
Above average, 3 inches in length
Has a pretty good balance of it
>Ability to self lubricate and produce precum; does not require store bought "lubrication"
Yes but I need to be mentally aroused, dick will be leaking precum at that point
>Ability to cum multiple times in one session
Can cum up to 3 times over the course of an hour, maybe 4 if I'm really horny
>Ejaculations (Volume, fertility (how white it is), and thickness
Well above average volume, very white, and usually a good balance of thickness, can get clumped up if I'm dehydrated in the days I'm producing it
Is kept neatly trimmed on pubic region and shaved on dick and balls
>Any abnormalties, std's, ED, shitty genetical features, or good genetical features
Bad: Right testicle kind of rises up a bit too much when I cum
Good: The head of my penis is much larger than the body, gives it a good phallic look instead of a pencil shape
>Will you ever even be able to use it? Have you used it?
I hope so; no.
7 posts and 3 images submitted.
i think you might be gay dude
We don't want to hear all that. That's gay dude. Also go data mine somewhere else
That's quite some work to fill this out.

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