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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 3. page

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So I was wearing this package enhancer and got my first ever phone number from a girl, it was this random chick at a mall walking out of a Victoria's Secret store buying slutty thongs
I wore tight pants with my revealing fake bulge and approached her like a boss, told her she was really sexy and I'd like to get to know her
''t-thanks but I have a boyfriend'' she said in a meek voice
She was a young 18 year old looking pale blonde girl with a decent pair of tits and a big ass, tight yoga pants with a thong line
I replied ''that's fine, I don't care if you have a boyfriend. let's get coffee''
the next day I phoned her and we set up a time for her to come over ''for a couple beers''
So I'm going to cuck a fucking stupid beta male who doesn't even realize his GF is a whore and I'm going to lose my virginity
I'm 19, so it's about damn time
I actually have a pretty big dick, but I'm a grower not a shower
Once I'm alone with her at my place, it'll be easy to get hard and she won't know the difference, she'll just assume that there is less of a bulge at first because I'm wearing different pants
20 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>39665438
>thinking she's actually gonna come over

Huehuehue
>>
>>39665475
We got coffee (she payed for her own, to my surprise), she let me put my arm around her like she was my bitch and I even felt her ass a bit

I saw her blatantly looking down at my ''dick'' while we were talking and she looked so proud to be walking with me when I put my arm around her and pulled her close

Pretty sure, she's down, bro
Girls really seem to fucking respect me when I wear this thing
A big dick just commands respect from women
>>
>>39665438
This thread would be alot better with >greentext

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You can ONLY post in this thread if your hair is brown.
35 posts and 10 images submitted.
>>
My hair is so brown it looks black.
And my brow overshadows my green eyes making them look brown.
So I'm basically a shitskin.
>>
>>39665413
literally THE most attractive combo to a t, stop being full of shit.
>>
>>39665364
at first i was gonna post in your thread just to troll you but then i remembered that my hair is brown

N..no one told me it would be this easy
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>ugly bitch will settle for robot because she can't get any from chad
>WOW IT'S SO EASY
>>
>>39665295
you are probbably a chad
>>
I think i've seen that girls face before.
desu I think this is fake.

Can I get pregnant from PIB (penis in boipussy) sexual intercourse?
13 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>>39665280

Yea, ok, why not. You can get pregnant this way. You can be utterly stupid and believe this. You can be utterly stupid with your dumb fantasies and live life as some stupid prostitute. You don't have a purpose. You've wasted your life. Your parents will hate you when you die. You have no legacy. You're a lump of consciousness. You're a disgrace to human being. Just get it over with. Kill yourself. You don't deserve life. You've done nothing with it, right? All the people suffering around the world and you ask these stupid, inane questions on how to pleasure yourself. You're an abomination of human being. Go fuck yourself. Eat shit. Die. Please, die.
>>
>>39665280
Ask yourself this: will sperm come into contact with an egg via injection in the vagina?

If yes then yes, if no then no.


Also, sluts will seek their fate at dweels of hell. Please reconsider your life choices
>>
>>39665280
You can, that's how black people are born

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When was the last time you were physically attacked?
11 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>39665233
two years ago outside the bar. some hick cheap shot me out of nowhere. I never fight back because i'm afraid of killing people
>>
>>39665233

Over a decade ago maybe at high school I can't even remember
>>
black guy beat me up trying to steal my phone. Cops pulled up round the corner, turned the sirens on and he ran off right into the path of a truck. I honestly don't know how to feel about that.

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>24
>5'7''
>ugly
>look like gollum from lord of the rings except huge nose
>white
>small dick
>dropout
>homeschooled
>failed college
>shut in
>live in small town, car is piece of shit that barely works and is money sink
>fired twice
>NEET for years
>constantly tired
>eyes always irritated and have dark bags under them permanently
>live with mom who gave up on me
>low IQ
>no hope
>went through many fetishes including sissy/trap shit
>all I wanted was women but isolation and low self esteem ruined me on a psycho-sexual level
>anger issues
>ego so fragile a basic insult could send me into hysteria
>can't leave house without severe anxiety
>can't spend a few minutes away from computer without sever anxiety
>did drugs and became paranoid
>might be schitzo
>ect. ect. ect.

Post your feels
59 posts and 11 images submitted.
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>>39665182
>went through many fetishes including sissy/trap shit

I thought there was hope for you until I got to this part
>>
Contact me

Frisk#6158

(Discord)
>>
I pretty much have suicidal thoughts every day but there are some periods where I'm pretty much ready to go do it and think about it in detail. I've settled on a firearm at this point if it comes to it.

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>The more you know the girl the more the "love" you felt when you saw her vanishes
Anyone else?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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You loved the idea of her, not her
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>>39665178
This is why im immune to sauce, if i get it the magick ends, you just see her as another human, not as that girl anymore
>>
>>39665178
Oh definitely. I usually get sick of my girlfriends at about the 3 month mark.

Should I get creampied by a random black guy from Craigslist?

I can't get a boyfriend. I'm getting really lonely and desperate here.
31 posts and 4 images submitted.
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Come on r9k I need answers
>>
>>39665176
>Should I get creampied by a random black guy from Craigslist?
>I can't get a boyfriend. I'm getting really lonely and desperate here.
Yes
>>
>>39665222
You're totally right. What have I got to lose anyway? No more second thoughts, I'm doing this

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When did you realize normies are all sociopaths trying to out-sociopath eachother

Theres a reason why they love social domination so much
11 posts and 3 images submitted.
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Luckily there are rules in place so they don't get too nasty
>>
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>>39665081
Its Darwinism. This phenomenon has always existed but Darwin, and by extension atheism, gave it grounding.
>>
>>39665081
I'm actually an honest-to-goodness sociopath, and I think most people are fucking monsters.

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What's the point of getting fit when you have a small dick
18 posts and 3 images submitted.
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>>39665061
Once you're buff, you can claim the steroids shrunk it, so no one will judge you.
>>
because a woman can overlook you having a small dick, but if you are miserable to be around with then there is no hope
>>
>>39665078
what if I just want to get those nice abs, i don't want to be buff


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