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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2944. page

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File: Chad's dick.png (45KB, 641x658px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Okay Robots, let's see find out how many secret Chads are in here:

27 posts and 20 images submitted.
>The mischievous small fish
> 11,8 cm

Pretty accurate
holy fug is this what my dick will look like if i loose weight?

i'm also bisexual.

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>see this teenager in front of liqour store as you're about to enter
>says "hey man me and a couple buddies just want some beer, can you help us out?"
What do you do?
12 posts and 4 images submitted.
Take my cut and buy it
Tell him to fuck off as I usually do, some underage niggas and underage girls keep asking me to buy the cigs everytime I go to buy chips. I just laugh at them and tell them to get lost.
Run to my car, lock the doors and make a pretend phone call while staring at them

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C'mon, robots.
We need more of these.
11 posts and 4 images submitted.
So people say that Eric was raped by a cop, is that true?
Can anyone recommend a good documentary on this? On YouTube?
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Uk anon here, I have a crate of assault sporks I've been saving for when I can't take it anymore and decide to make good on my plans for the day of the spork. Any tips on getting Highscore with assault cutlery?

Which look will get you more pussy?
I want to reinvent my looks, and I'm wondering if I'll have more women attracted to me if I go for a more pretty-boyish look, or if I go for a manly man look.
I've got a decent mixture of feminine and masculine facial features, smooth rounded jaw, bushy eyebrows, wide and defined nose, pronounced chin etc. And I've got wavy, curly hair.
I'm quite muscular and a little pudgy at 5'8" and 160lbs, and am wondering if I should drop some weight and become thinner, and get my face more defined and all that, or if I should bulk up and pack on more muscular.
So yeah, what would you say women prefer? I know some guys who've got the whole short, skelly, and pretty thing going on who get tons of women, and I obviously know some tall, muscular, cave man looking chads who get the same.
I'm mainly looking to attract alternative girls, socially outcasted girls, and fembot types.
What would you fembots prefer?
31 posts and 7 images submitted.
Pretty gets underaged girls. Manly gets underaged AND normal aged girls.
>I'm mainly looking to attract alternative girls, socially outcasted girls, and fembot types.
pretty look for sure

big hair and sharp features is a winner
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pretty gets dat mad dick 2bh

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This guy comes up and gives your girlfriend a firm handshake.
What do you do?
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
I would give him a hug, and brush my hand against his sweatpants cock area. If he's bigger than me then I suckerpunch him and we leave immediately.
tells him that you don't shake girls hands

you sort of kiss them on the cheek
Give him the job because he deserves it.

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What do you think of this quote?
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
i don't know i can't relate to be frank. maybe for someone else. i already know i am light and powerful thanks
Always thought it was platitude but as I get older, I can see the deeper potential of things. But that wasn't necessarily a "fear" in me, it was just that I didn't really believe it to be true.
our deepest fear is that we are irrelevant
thus all our power is served to prove otherwise
but the truth is that we are irrelevant
acceptance, not courage, is the enemy of fear

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I have a tiny bit of weed but nothing to smoke it with. Any help?
30 posts and 5 images submitted.
go buy ciggies, pour out the tobaccy, put in the weed
Cut a hole in a water bottle, put tinfoil over it and poke holes in the tinfoil with toothpick. Cut a hole in the back of bottle to use as carb, put weed in the tinfoil and use the mouthpiece to hit it.
Apple pipe, look it up

why aren't you robots taking cbd oil?
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
Because supplements are a meme.
tried a few squirts idk if it did a thing
I tried it on 3 different occasions from 3 different manufacturers. It did absolutely fucking nothing for me other than reduce pain in my knees, but I can just take ibuprofen for the same way effect much cheaper.
You can't be Chad, stop trying to get ignorant robots to buy your DUDEWEED snake oil

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>dick is 8 inches
>can't tell anyone at risk of sounding insecure
>no girl to share my monster cock with

Any other robots feel this?
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
Dicks are odd anyway. No women wants to know about it.
Press it flat against the table instead of hovering over the tape, that looks more like 7 and a half inches.
why don't u fuck some random ugly bitch so she can tel everyone about your monster cock?

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Need some advice, m8s

>Go to Home Depot daily for lunch and/or dinner.
>Cutie 3.14 cashier has begun to notice me
>every time I come in she smiles, says hi, and asks how my day is going
>I think she likes me
>She always has a Mickey Mouse pin on her uniform

I have enough money saved up. Should i book a trip to Disneyland for us and surprise her? I think it's a gyood way to show her how nice I am and it's a good way to start a relationship. What do you guys think?
37 posts and 3 images submitted.
>Go to Home Depot daily for lunch and/or dinner.

Home Depot has the best food
That's the most autistic and sad thing I've heard on this board for a while


ITT: Things that happened to you that no one will believe.

When I was 14 years old, my mom would give me handjobs and blowjobs whenever I asked. She'd also let me play with her tits and ass, but no penetration. This lasted for 3 years, and I still masturbate to the memories today.
23 posts and 4 images submitted.
Greentexts please

Oddly enough, I don't believe you.
i'm a guy who was raped by an older man in my teen years

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Hey guys. General Christian discussion thread.

I have the stomach flu, which is a real treat, so I might be a bit testier than I usually would be.

There will be NO
>promotion of pornography
>promotion of masturbation
>promotion of an hero
>promotion of gay sex
>promotion of otherwise degenerate acts
Without argument, that is.

I am Catholic, Lutherans and a lot of the main protestant sects are fine by me, Orthodox is alright. Weird religions like Mormonism is NOT true Christianity, in my mind it's no better than Islam.
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
Who here /neverdonedrugs/ or /neverdrankalcohol/ ?
I've drank alcohol before, definitely that comes with communion, but I've never done drugs, nor will I. It's not explicitly disallowed, but it's recommended to not do drugs.
>stomach flu
I thought people over 12 didn't get the stomach flu. What happened OP?

Are pitbulls /r9k/ the dog?

>hated by people and dogs alike
>"laugh one more time" mentality
>aggressive, misunderstood
18 posts and 2 images submitted.
r9k is more like an obese pug
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they're honest to god nigger dogs.

>mfw 22 of the 33 of the human deaths caused by dogs last year were by pitbulls
>deaths, this isn't even counting injuries or permanent disfiguring

the only people who like them are aging chubby women who think the dog is her "protector" right before it chews off her childs face.
>22 of the 33 of the human deaths
*22 of 33 human deaths

Asked by some to give more advice. Thought I gave it a go with an origano thread.

Me: r9k lurker, non-robot but I somehow symphatize with you bros.

That said, most here are too mentally challenged or trollmode to give actual advice. Feel free to ask something you want anothers opinion on. Some tits that never seen the web included
11 posts and 3 images submitted.
how long does it take to get max cape on osrs? consider a 10h/day grind
How do I make girls notice me?
When will you kill yourself normie shit?

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>there's eight pop tarts in here
>individual packaging for each two
>cardboard box and design for everyone

How do they make money when you can get eight pop tarts for only two bucks? Is making sugary pastries that cheap?
6 posts and 2 images submitted.
Wait these costs 2 dollars in the US?

If I buy them imported here it's like 8 euros.
Usually can get them for under a dollar.
sugar and flour at bulk are cheap as hell
and that's what pop tarts are 99% constructed of
probably takes just one guy watching a conveyor machine spit them out at high speed

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