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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 2654. page

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How you doing Lads? Post how you're feeling and what you're doing at the moment.
207 posts and 37 images submitted.
Waiting to go back to Uni so I get to do what I want but I have to do a shit ton of work when I get there.
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been NEET since 16 because i'd rather shitpost on r9k all day than be surrounded by cunts who hate me for being "the weird kid".
That kid never got to play Breath of the Wild

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Why are normies so obsessed with birthdays?

>turned 20 last week

>sitting in my room (dad's house) minding my own business on my birthday

>dad comes in and says my mom wants me to go to her house and fix her modem, says she'll pay me $40

>tell him I don't need the money and don't want to do it

>he then says that he wants all of us (me, dad, mom, brothers, sister, grandmother, grandfather) to have dinner together to celebrate my birthday

>apparently my mom made steak just for me and got me a cake

>say that I don't care and go back to my game

>he thinks I'm joking even though I'm dead serious, keeps asking me to go with him

>eventually he realizes that I'm not kidding, gets very upset and leaves

>go downstairs a few minutes later to get a snack, see him sitting on the couch with his face in his hands

>still don'tgiveafuck.jpg

>a while later my grandmother drops in, begs me to come to my birthday dinner

>when I refuse she tries to twist my words into implying that I don't care about her

>laugh and say sure, go back to my game and ignore her

>normie family goes and enjoys the food and cake without me

>everyone acts like I'm a horrible person for the next few days

Why am I in the wrong here? Why is it so hard for some people to accept that I simply don't give a shit about my birthday and want to be left alone?
451 posts and 40 images submitted.
You might want to consider whether or not you are a psychopath. Not a joke or insult. You sound like a legitimate psychopath.
I know how you feel anon my birthday is just like a other day for me accept people want to do things with me for no reason
>no one congratulated me on my birthday
g-good they're stupid anyway i-it's not like I care

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>constantly want to fuck
>can have good taste in vidya, movies, and music if you show them it
>won't leave you as long as you don't hurt them
I exclusively date overweight girls and it's great. The only downside is they're very sensitive. Why don't you get a fat gf robots?
224 posts and 47 images submitted.
>exclusively date ___ girls
so you can't maintain relationships?
Because you'd have to look at her, smell her, and watch her eat. Fucking disgusting degenerates.
I am the fat gf. @[email protected]

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Hug your sister and post results below.
Kirino dum edition.
505 posts and 109 images submitted.
>Kirino dum edition.

Uh, if you say so.
Why does this thread always appear when I'm on /r9k/?
jack off while you wait and hope that your mom comes in the room at the same time you ejaculate

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What is it about some men that drives them to let women take advantage of them?
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
Disgusting Nazi girls, leave that colored gentleman alone.
Like you wouldn't like to get pinned by those roasties
lol what is the backstory for this kek

has me rolling

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Women are just walking vaginas. You literally can't prove me wrong.
6 posts and 3 images submitted.
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4chan is just an anime fansite.
You can't prove me wrong.
Well I like to think of the woman as the life support system for the vagina. It keeps it alive and moist.
Men are just walking dicks. You literally can't prove me wrong.

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why do european women fuck homeless migrant niggers in public trash littered sidewalks?
13 posts and 4 images submitted.
get blacked you /pol/ nig.
European women aren't even classified as women anymore, they're some kind of monkey's with tits
we wuz romans

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>tfw no 4'11" (150~ cm) or otherwise really short and cute girlfriend

The size difference is so cute. I want a qt girlfriend who's significantly smaller than me to love and cuddle ;-;
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
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>tfw 6'4

>basically only attracted to 5'4 and under

No smol girls want a lanky tsundere bf
I'm 6 ft and ALMOST had a 4'11" girl who was interested in me, but I came across too strong too fast and she lost interest

feels so, so, so bad.

Truth be told I've found a few before, but it's only online.

I need to find a femlet IRL who wants a skelly lanklet tsundere bf

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>be me
>former robot, but learned how to become normie
>walk up to qt girl in bar
>speaking to her, she looks happy, going well
>"how tall are you, anon?"
>nigga u looking right at me
>"I'm 5'11"
>She pulls a wierd face
>"oh I didn't know you were short, I kinda only date guys over 6'
>wtf bitch, 5'11 is like average fucking height and you're really worried about one fucking inch? and you were totally fine until I gave you that pointless number

Why are girls so dumb?
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
Today, on our episode of things that never happened......
Next time I'm gonna tell her I'm 9'15
and maybe she'll just suck me off there and then
..is it really hard to believe?

>dad bought me a book for my birthday
>cuz he knew I was "into computers n stuff"

Gee, t-thanks dad
7 posts and 2 images submitted.
>inb4 winblows phone user
He got me the wp as well, three years ago
ur dad is lowkey telling you to order him some drugs off the dark net
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deep webs real anon its pretty boring and filled with scamers

at least they didnt gift you how to win friends, influence people, and succeed in a changing world by dale carnegie lol

>tfw some normie called me out
>said i smell

15 posts and 2 images submitted.
Shower every day, with body wash and shampoo. Deoderant and colonge as well.
Spaghetti will go bad in your pockets if kept too long. Make sure you're refrigerating it at home.
Just use OldSpice products; if you sweat, use sports deoderant

and wash your body, you fucking mongrole

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Okay, robots... I dated a girl from work who was a bit younger than me. I'm 24. she was 17. That's legal here. We broke up.

While we were dating, her friend and I would always flirt. She also worked with us. She initiated the flirting.

Her and I developed a dynamic in which she really liked being told what to do and semi-abused verbally.

I saw her when I was at the tail end of my relationship at a bar (she has a fake ID). The way she made eye contact, I could tell she wanted it. She punched my shoulder playfully, I ignored her because she knew my gf and we were having problems.

I'm single now. she's 19 and single. I'm not sure if she was just into me because I had gf and developed a subtly taboo relationship with her, or if she's still into me.

How would I best go about fucking her. I dont have her number, but am connected on social media.

Thanks yallls
14 posts and 5 images submitted.
>these are the thoughts that occupy the normie's mind throughout his life
Jus be yourself breh, it's what I do and it always works!
wrong board? you seem lost

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>in the street with my labrador puppy
>tfw all those qt girls asking me if they can touch my puppy
i let them touch the puppy and i stay quiet, should i ask for her numbers or something

im a 5'6 19yo kv
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
I don't know mang, but whatever, post pupper.
Use a tinder profile picture with you and the puppy. Get mad matches.
Probably should get a phone before asking for a girls number anon

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>be me, once again
>door gets knocked on at 4 a.m.
>answer it
>it's neighbourgirl, dressed whorishly
>she looks excited and grabs my hand, telling me to come with her
>I don't move, little girls can't actually drag me around
>I try to think quickly about if I actually want to go fuck her
>my kettle is boiling and my window is open
>and I say, ah whatever
>go to her house next door
>right before she opens the door she says:
>I want you to meet my friends
>wait, what? I have to put on clothes if you have guests over.
>No, it's okay just come in!

Anyway, my hopes of an orgy were also dashed in a minute or two. The girls danced around me for a bit, hard to tell if they were on drugs or just girls. I just stood there, which was slightly awkward, but better than dancing. Hung out for a bit, but mostly just listened to their tripe. When I got them on their own for a bit, they were mildly interesting to speak to, together, they were just all playing off eachother. I wasn't doing anything else though so I stayed with them for a while, and enh meh. A bike got stolen, I bought them some smokes and made a bit of a profit.

>I gave you twenty bucks to buy smokes, where's my change?
>I paid with my credit card, I have no change
>oh well someone owes me six bucks
> I nod
>no one brings it up again

And the other girl agreed to come clean my house again in exchange for getting her a pack of smokes. Might mention I thought she was going to fuck me when she's over here doing my dishes to see how she reacts.
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
Stop. You are being used.
Worse is girls who substance abuse will be hell.. Ive had a year of first base orbitting with some crazy bitch in similar circumstances and just used me as an emotional crutch. Only to treat me like shit later.

Two redlights anon: can you have s normal conversation? Is she abusing alcohol o drugs?

Even if she puts out do you really want her to fake rape chrages , get std's or worse end up paying for a bastard you'll never even see let alone be a dad to?

I'm exaggerating but point remains she sounds like poison. They smell loneliness brobot.
But what happened to the kettle faggot?
Well, I came back later and poured myself a cup of tea.
Enh, yeah, this isn't really an orbit situation. She's kind of okay, but we aren't really compatible but I'd likely bang her. Their game is pretty straightforward, they come over when they need an older guy to get smokes or if they want money. If they want money, I just set them to work doing random tasks for me, like dishes or doing my laundry. If smokes, I usually just keep the change.

I'm not so easily lured into traps as the typical poster around here, don't worry about me that way.

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KHHVs: What makes you happy and what keeps you going?
10 posts and 2 images submitted.
escapism always works well. video games, drugs, anime, etc
chunni mentality
i unironically believe im gonna be a wizard
>What makes you happy
I can't remember the last time I felt happy.
>what keeps you going?
Abusing prescription stimulants.

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