Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1894. page

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That moment when your boyfriend
>stops texting you as much as in the beginning
>doesnt seem to be as happy when you both meet
>you dont meet a lot of days during the month
>he doesnt have kind words for you as much

Why this always happens with boyfriend after some time? At first I was going behind him asking what was going on, now I just pass. I dont want to be clingy, but come on

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hi robutts,

i need you help making a decision.

>meet a fat single mother on tinder
>invites me to a concert tonight
>she seems to want to sleep with me
>i haven't had sex since december and am a little desperate
>don't want to go because i have bad anxiety and agoraphobia and i hate too much noise/lights/stimulation
>tell her yes anyway
>jerk off just now
>really, really don't want to go because i've lost all interest in sex

do i:
a) go and try to fug her
b) make up an excuse why i can't go and try to meet her some other time
c) just not show up

dubs will decide.

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Would you consider sleeping with someone on the first date?

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>Be me
>Be really horny
>Devise plan to last longer while jacking off
>Take hairtie
>Fold one end on the other to make it smaller/tighter
>Put in on my balls
>rub my balls
>Feelslikegod.jpg
>Holy shit this is awsome
>start fapping
>Almost there
>Get this urge to squeeze my balls really hard
>Do it
>Feels godly
>Take Hairtie off
>pain

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>parents think I'm going to work
>have actually just been sleeping the park for 8 hours

who else here /mischief/?

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So I jizzed in my sisters panties and I'm worried that the semen might come in contact with her vagina if she puts them on and create little retard redneck incest children. How likely is this to happen?

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Does anybody else on r9k ever get vagina envy?

l'm not sure if l realIy want to be a woman, but l look at my dick and just wish l had a vagina sometimes. I hate having a refractory period. I realIy wish l could have multiple orgasms. Good sex and masturbation just seem so much more pleasurabIe for women it makes me deepIy depressed...
It just feeIs like both bioIogy and my body have betrayed me. Anyone eIse here know this feeIing?

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why only men commit suicide and never the female?
why is there no virgin females?
why have females no mental illness? No depression?
why females can have sex and touch boobs anytime they want

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>mom isn't home
>have to make my own dinner
>tried to make instant mash potatoes snce I have 2 packs and it's good
>wasted the first pack becuase I fucked up
>I added the powder and water together and it just turned into a hard lump
>2nd pack I added too much water and turned into a soup
>the powder wont break up either so it's not going fluffy
>I add corn starch to thicken it but it doesn't work
>add regular flour and it kinda thickens up but now it's full of lumps
>so hungry and I really want mashed potatoes so I don't care
>remember that I have a can of baked beans
>maybe if I add some baked beans into this soup it will get better
>open can and attempt to pour out some of the tomato juice
>manage to pour almost the entire can of beans into the sink
>start cleaning it up
>smash is still on the stove and it starts to burn
>rush over, add the remaining beans and scrape away the mash that's burnt to the bottom
>let it heat for a while before I pour it all in a big bowl
>it looks so fucknig disgusting
>it's pink, has chunks of burnt mash, flour and corn starch in it
>It honestly just tasted like mash powder and flour with a hint of beans
>can feel the uncooked potato powder and all the chunks while I eat
>I have to eat it since I don't have any other food at the moment

I'm not even /fat/

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Wow guys! The advice really works!
>be me 4/10
>Went to store to get some food
>see cute girl in aisle next to food
>think up a game plan
>halfway through my plan i realize
>"wait! All i have to do is be myself!"
>so i walk up to her and say
>"hey, i just saw you and wanted to say hi. My name's anon"
>she says "awww you're so sweet"
>she says "wanna eat sometime?"
> i say "yeah sure, let me give you my number"
>i give it to her and she says "i'll call you." And winks
>a week later, i get a call
>it's her!
>we talk for a few hours and eventually make plans
>we decide to go to a pizza place
>i get there and she's waiting for me at a table
>we talk and talk and eventually the date is over
>we're outside the pizza shop, saying our last goodbyes.
>she says "wow anon. You really gave me a fun night without needing any sex, drugs, or alchohol"
>i say "aww thanks."
>then she kisses me
>ON THE LIPS!
Then i woke up!

I'm thinking of trying this irl. It worked once. Shouldn't it work again?
>pic unrelated

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If you had to describe this board to someone, what would you tell them?

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>go to /pol/
>"Could any white supremacists here actually define "white" for me? The truth is, race is not a meaningful term in science. There is greater genetic veariety within races than between them. White-skinned people probably only came about 5,000 years ago. 5,000 years is very little time for a group to evolve, so any difference in intelligence between whites and other races would be ao insignificant as to not be noticeable."

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what happned to the fag who said something is going to happen in 29 hours?

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Anyone else ever look back at their shitposting or incensed replies with embarrassment and just want it to go away, even if it's anonymous? I often wonder why I let myself get so wrapped up in such negativity and pointless anger. It's probably because I'm a full time wagie and wish I had more time.

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>Hey Anon where are you going to be at school today? Why? No reason