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Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1691. page

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

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How many pairs of underwear do you own? My second to last pair just ripped.
12 posts and 1 images submitted.
I own seven pieces or pairs of everything, expect pants.
I own 6 pairs of medium boxers and 12 pairs of large boxers from when I was fat. The generic kind you buy in multi-packs, because let's face it I got no one to impress with my undergarment choices.
Only 3 and I'm wearing my last "clean" one. I have to shower and do laundry today so that means I have to free ball in jeans.

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So I'm going to a LARP camping week soon, same as my friend. He's got about $70 to spend on a helmet, but he can't decide between leather or steel. So he wants you guys to decide.

Yes, a helmet is necessary. He has autism, and refuses to go into battle without one.
26 posts and 3 images submitted.
Leather's probably cheaper, plus steel's gonna get uncomfortable as fuck after a while.
He likes to tank though, and that's the point that I tried bringing up when he kept repeating 'steel' over and over.
You are one ugly fuck

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Baka! Baka!
Silly Onii-chan!
13 posts and 6 images submitted.
Go away child molseter.
No, l'm here to stay.
Why are there so many paydo thread baiters today?

It's just the touhou project. That's a fairy. Alot of the characters of touhou are like a thousand years old.

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Are robots smart enough to know that race is not a social construct?
19 posts and 4 images submitted.
>Are robots smart enough

Forensics and anthropology.
and Forensics anthropology.
>race is a social construct
there's a reason why pol exist
Second one looks like ape, as usual.

Genetic engineering reporting in.

Nekos welcome.

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>first day at work
>long time patient dies

w-was it me
8 posts and 2 images submitted.
Why didn't you smile and say "Hi"? That would have kept them going for a little while longer but the despair from being ignored caved in their will to live.
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>first day at work
>building catches fire

it was me
>first day at work
>accidentally fart on receptionist
Haha oops

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>tfw honestly think a spider laid eggs in my ear last night

how do i handle this?
14 posts and 2 images submitted.
Don't worry robot, spiderbro is hear for you now
Do you think you're funny, well Ill have you know you're not
This. Don't ever try and crack jokes again

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Will you accept the cards that nature dealt to you and become a fag?

It's all about Jawline, and cheekbones and height.

You can stick that PUA bullshit up your ass and cum
7 posts and 1 images submitted.
Stop raiding us, /lgbt/.
Stop trying to convert lonely people into faggots you faggots it's the most desperate thing in existence.
>try convert everyone into being a faggot
>be surprised when people want to hang you

who /raised by narcissistic mom/ here? its almost 4am and if i dont type this shit out i will throw myself out the window

>grew up believing my oldest brother was the devil for constantly getting into screaming matches with her, i would say and do the meanest shit to him in defense of her
>very recently realized out that my brother never did anything wrong, in fact she would always start shit and then beat him to the phone to bitch and cry to my dad about how terrible of a son he is (he was always out on business trips)
>mom and dad had a cold relationship (she was a LITERAL stacy, dad is a non-neurotic normal tech manager), middle brother got the whole middle sibling treatment of no attention positive or negative, so i was literally the only person in her family she could talk to about her """"""stress"""""
>my whole fucking childhood i spent doing emotional gymnastics and shaping my psyche around being her prepubescent shoulder to cry on
>ive had major depression since i was in 5th grade but had no idea why because my family was fairly well off financially (yes ive thought about things in financial terms since i was a very little kid, probably had to do with the whole "bending over backward for mom" thing), always been an outcast but never been physically bullied
>i am painfully plastic around people and cannot fit into social settings even though im apparently just the funniest fucking guy around
>literally cant even interact with women on any level deeper than "hi how are ya"
>tfw all at once realizing all the time ive squandered in autistic paralysis, all the years of damage i've done to friends and family, the absolute state of my psyche that im too autistic to talk to anyone IRL about
>that creeping feeling of not feeling like an actual person, just some shoddily taped together personality squished into a tiny transparent coffin, with the constant vivid sensation of pic related
21 posts and 5 images submitted.
Fuck anon, I'm sorry to hear that. I think my mom has narcissistic tendencies and I can identify with some of these (real shit at social interaction). I think the worst is feeling like I have to be her personal counselor. I just wanna be left the fuck alone.

You still live with her or the shit just really got to ya?
Everyone's parents are their burden.

How old are you? It seems like you've given this a lot of thought. Having a heart to heart conversation with your mom and dad separately and telling them what you just typed might give you some closure.
Bout to go to uni. I suppose its better to realize this at 18 than at 48. I just realized i literally wont function under these mental conditions in the real world for very long, just like you couldnt work for long if you had a slipped disc and never went to a doctor. But crippling autism and being poor have prevented me seeing a therapist so idk.
Ive talked with my brothers and my long time family friend (third brother basically) about this recently and it helped a lot, but i still cant get over this social retardation. That family friend is my only IRL friend and hes 7 fucking years older than I and hes gonna move for work soon.

My motto that ive lived by my whole life has amounted to "it probably cant get any shittier than this so just keep pretending to be a functional human and youll be fine" and its worked so far even when i keep getting proven wrong. But its not a good long term solution

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>forced to share a bed with older sister because staying in hotel room
>if she sleeps facing me her tits are in my face
>if she sleeps with her back to me my dick gets nestled between her ass cheeks

FUUUCK why must life be suffering just kill me now
13 posts and 3 images submitted.
Gotta sleep facing away from each other, ass to ass

Try not to fart on each other now
Face away from her you retard
Sleep with your back to her.

I'm addicted to iced water. It's so refreshing, I can't get enough.
14 posts and 5 images submitted.
thats very healthy addiction
Ewww, water drinker


Euro here. How much would it cost to pay a Czech or Polish whore to be your lewd ASMR girlfriend for one night, who provides cuddles and whispering into your ear?
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
LID erally just buy an escort that does fetishes and say you have a sound fetish.
Giv taylor gf
ewww lmoa

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Hi /r9k/ it is currently 5:47 and i have spent the last 3 and a half hours masturbating
Recommend me a good movie to watch. Doesnt matter what kind of movie. Kids movies, romance, comedy, action, i dont really care. I just want something to do other than masturbating since i accidentally pulled an all nighter due to masturbation
19 posts and 2 images submitted.
so far im thinking either Austin Powers or The Lego Movie
I know theyre gay picks but i watched austin powers as a kid and i heard the theme music today at work and it made me want to watch it, and i think the lego movie is just good.
Watch 'Aguirre, The Wrath of God' friendo
Kingsman: The Secret Service
It's a funny action spy movie.

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why do we hate him again?
22 posts and 5 images submitted.
Only lifeless virgins hate him. He's the most based chad in the world
Team 10 it's always lit the torch of western civilization 1488

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Pic related grabs you by your throat and lifts you in the air
>what did you say little white boi?
>you want this bbc rammed in your boi pussy or something?

how do you respond to his obviously superior 11/10 tyrone?
16 posts and 2 images submitted.
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I suddenly disappear, Tryone is left clutching at the air
*teleport behind him*
"Heh, nothing personnel, kid"
*Unsheath katana and unleash my kazejutsu*
Tyrone is turned into a fine red mist.
i-it's not like I want you to rape me, tyrone-s-san
If he can lift me up with one hand then that nigger can have whatever he wants

>make thread appealing to mental illness support but literally is only doing it for attention, and looks down their nose at anybody who isnt high functioning.

>that group of dudes at EVERY workplace ever that only talk about game of thrones and vape shit

>steal literally everything we found first kicking us out oof it and claiming it as their own.


literally die all of you
16 posts and 1 images submitted.
>ITT: things normies do that bother you

They never stop fucking talking.
It's exhausting.
>why don't you have a gf anon
>normies that use spotify every day but only listens to the "Top list" and other flavour of the month music.

Fucking hate this so much. I always use music as an ice breaker when I'm getting to know new people. And normies have the most dull, boring music taste in the world.

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