Archived threads in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 - 1568. page

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>tfw I'm a 30 year old man in bed watching this in the dark while tearing up

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eRXpDQ4k1zA

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Have you dashing gentleman embraced the superior porn genre that is chicks with dicks?

>but anon...das gay
Nope. You are confusing girls with dicks with men wearing wigs and dresses. Only the latter is gay.

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Hey guys.

Any freshmen going to ECSU this year?

I hate having a roommate, so I might as well have one that shares some common interests.

>inb4 goto /soc/
Already going to post there, but I'd prefer a robot.

And just to make this thread kosher, any tips for a robot going away to college?

God I hate the spam bot.

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>people are actually having sex right now
>your female coworkers are moaning their boyfriends name right now
>that cute older neighbor has her legs wrapped around her husband right now
>those teenage girls are discussing who fucks chad first
>that cute random girl you passed has completely forgot about you while you still think about life with her is currently setting up a fuck date with some guy on tinder right now

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It'd be called: "Trapped in the friendzone", and it would be about this girl who refers to her vagina as the friendzone because that's where she likes to "trap" her friends and it's about one friend desperately trying to escape the friendzone.

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What experience makes you regret being a beta fuck the most?

Mine just happened to me:
> biking home
> 9PM
> tard paralyzed old lady in a wheelchair on sidewalk with middle aged dude and a dog
> as im passing hear the tard old lady yelling "I... need.... help" and it sounds like shes crying
> turn around to investigate, maybe the guy is accosting her
> approach, everything seems fine at first glance
> "you guys okay?"
> guy says "we're good, you okay?"
> old lady is too disabled and retarded to indicate much of anything or realize I'm there
> "yup"
> guy says "you just checking in on us, or?"
> autism kicks in, worried I just overreacted, say "h-have a nice night" and leave
> get to house 5 minutes later
> thinking back on it again that lady pretty desperately and clearly said she needed help
> get in car and cruise by that street again
> they're nowhere in sight

Fuck, I feel terrible.
I know odds are the guy wasn't doing anything and is just her caretaker or something, but if he really was doing something shady I basically did nothing, I should've questioned him a little more

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I pretend to be Christian but I know it's bullshit. It firstly makes my social life a bit easier, and secondly sometimes I like to pretend life actually has some kind of inherent meaning.

Does anybody else do this?

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>tfw you'll probably die alone because you can't find the middle ground between misogynist robot and userous, manipulative chad

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Rough day today for me /r9k/.

>come home from work
>have snack
>settle on couch for a short nap
>sharp rapping on door
>it's a nice police lady
>she says my upstairs neighbour is missing and have I seen him
>i say not since yesterday and he was well then is somewhat tired looking
>police lady asks me to call her back if I have any updates, then takes off
>i think about this for a few minutes
>call neighbour's cellphone
>no answer
>say fuck it, grab my emergency key for his place, go up there and check
>he's sitting on his couch
>dead
>some small amount of blood and foam around his nose
>frantically call emergency
>police lady is back in blink of an eye
>coroner comes
>no determination of cause at this time aside from medical (not drugs)
>suicide unlikely

First time I have ever seen a dead person. I dunno how to feel. Just shocked. I didn't know him well as he just moved in the month before. He had two kids.

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Any other robots have someone die in their life that they can't let go of. It's been 7 years since my older brother died but I still get sad about it even though everyone else is over him I can't get over it.

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>be 27 year old KHH virgin me
>get job in education in desperate attempt to relive wasted youth
>identify alpha teenage girls I never had chance with in high school
>secretly record conversations I have with them
>listen to recordings every night as I drift to sleep pretending it's teenage me being emotionally connecting with these girls
>cry when I remember this is the closest I'll get to intimacy with another pure human being

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ya era justo y necesario un hilo en nuestro idioma para poder compartir feels y estar comfy

de donde eres?
que te acongoja?

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why am i crying
can someone take the pussy beta shit out of me please

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who /bags under eyes/ here

Is there a cure or am I fucked?

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>be 76 year old robot
>was an angry young man who abused my kids when they were growing up
>son is now 48 years old, abused his own one and only child
>my grandson is 20 years old and on the wrong path in life
>violent druggie who views the world through unbridled hatred
>has a one year old baby with another crackhead who's about 15 years older than him
>the cycle of abuse might be perpetuated upon a fourth generation

All of the problems in my family can be laid directly at my feet. All of them. I deserve to burn in Hell.

I was born on a miserable winter night in 1941. It was the coldest night in all of American history up to that point. Yet the freezing winds were warm compared to the heart that newborn baby would grow up to possess.