*blocks your path*

fuck cagers fuck racists and FUCK white people

basted

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Psssh, nuthin' personal, cager

>>1093080
That's what you get for riding too close to parked cars.

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>>1093080
>>1093096
Passing on the right, never again

>riding on multi purpose trail along waterfront
>passing ferry terminal
>hear what sounds like pig squealing in pain
>is 400lb woman screaming at me
>learn how to walk!
>you can't bike here!
>she is leaning on a bike rack smoking

>>1093105
Actually had something like this happen to me a few weeks ago on a local MUT. There is signs everywhere that say leashes must be shorter than 6ft, but this still happens once in a while, usually not this bad though

>morbidly obese woman walking a mutt that vaguely resembles a pitbull only because it has a block head
>her dog is obese, walks with a limp, probably because his joints are fucked from being SO obese
>astonished about the morbid obesity of the couple
>she's literally got some absurd retractable leash on a MUT which is completely unlocked and her dog is walking on the opposite edge
>freewheel loudly, slam it into a gear lower and then brake with my carbon wheels
>dog looks back
>lard must be clogging up this lady's ear drums
>slow roll up beside the dog on the gravel shoulder of the path
>roll at like .5mph beside her dog and run my hand across his back to show my dominance to the revolting woman
>he feels like a balloon filled with pudding
>she looks over and looks horrified about the heinous crime I've committed, showing her dog a modicum of attention
>can hear her panting through my earbuds during a break in the music (wearing because recovery rides are boring as fuck)
>launches into some kind of rant, I can only assume her rage was caused by the hormones in all the ground beef from wal-mart she's been eating causing a hormonal imbalance
>what I could hear from her rant was her dog is a "pitbull" and he is going to attack me and then something about how I couldn't afford a car
>dog (not a pitbull) was clearly friendly and not afraid of strangers at all and wasn't even startled by my freewheeling or carbon wheels
>look over at her with a stunned look on my face
>she still hasn't realized that I literally had to leave the path to pass her
>pedal 10ft ahead and go back on the path
>still hear her ranting
>glance back and see she hasn't even retracted the leash to make him stay on the proper side of the path

Stupid obese Americans

>>1093105
>>1093119
These. The problem is almost never the dog, and almost always the fault of a stupid human.

>come around corner on MUP
>dog in the middle of the path, no leash, owner a few yards behind
>come here Lobo, here boy!
>doggo does not give two fucks about owner
>doggo does not give two fucks about oncoming cycling
>doggo stands happily in the middle of the path enjoying the sunny day
>come here now! Lobo!
>Lobo is clearly the boss in this relationship
>"wolf" is a mutt about the size of a collie, fat, furry, and obviously a friendly family pet
>I laughed so hard I almost crashed

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>>1093080
engage in a passive discussion about religion. make her extremely turned off as possible
keep walking while trying to disengage
her female hormones still raging for my manhood as i back away
WEW
that was close

>>1093084
supermanfags BTFO

>>1093111
>riding to work one day
>commuting around cars, been doing this same route for months now
>some fat dumbass passes me too close and then yells "get off the road!" and gives me the finger when we're both at a stop sign
>point at him and puff my cheeks out, mime rubbing a big fat belly
>laugh at him and pedal away

>>1093080
I cast Lightning Bolt!

*rolls d20*

14!

>>1093136
Touching that car

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>>1093105
>leash

implying the dog would be on one.

>>1093081
you masturbating m8?

>>1093111
>>1093128
>>1093119
I love it when fatties try to preach to me about how and where to ride bikes they can't even fit on.

>>1093136
some people are just born assholes. i usually drive a car but i really hope some bikefags accidentally scratch these with their pedals as they pass.

>>1093104
EVERY FUCKING V-BRAKE IS OFF-CENTER REEEEEEEEEE
>dutch
oh nvm thats the standard for those crappy bikes

>>1093120
That dog was named after his brain procedure.

>>1093136
everytime I see these I just want to intentionally run into them, like so
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzE-IMaegzQ

then I realize how pointless it is and it'd hurt me more

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*blocks your path*

Seriously what are these for?

I love cycling down the canal but these things piss me off when I have to slow down and carefully weave through, or get off the bike entirely and lift over.

Who thought that was a good idea?

>>1093105
Every time I cycle past a dog I wonder if this will be the one that will run under my wheel.

Dogs are fucking stupid.

>>1093105
>ride on only somewhat straight and flat bikelane in town
>only 3% incline
>ride down at only 35ish km/h since combined lane and people ahead
>more than enough space to pass
>dog without leash jumps in my way for no reason
>brake as hard as I can
>stop 30cm before dog
>owner yells at me and claims that I would have to slow down to walking speed
>I say bullshit and there is a sign saying you have to keep your dog on a leash

I continued riding since I was not interested in conflict.
Also this lane is known to be used by faster cyclists because it is a nice place to ride fast.

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Those are there so you could train cyclocross dismounts and jumping over obstacles with the bike on your shoulder obviously

>>1093187
So that old people aren't afraid of fast cyclists

>>1093257
>be gramps
>"dang ol stupid cyclist with their skinny tire faggot bikes weaving through pedestrians"

E-bikeCraze.jpg

Gramps weaving through pedestrians with his glorified singetrack mobility scooter at 50 km/h.png

>>1093187
they help you to hone your bunny hop skills.

>>1093104

Lol everyone is cramping gramps' style

>>1093080
veer right, break his arms

>>1093166
But they wear helmets so they're probably German tourists.

>>1093104
>grandpa in the back who left his shoulders at home

does he plug his arms into the bottom of his neck for aero jesus christ

>>1093272
It's true

>>1093354
Another example of motorists being shortsighted and retarded; I love how they don't consider any hazard that's a hazard to cyclists an actual hazard unless it would also be a hazard to them. Puddle? Buncha sticks and shit in the shoulder? Shinny mess that might be glass? Yeah, fuck it, push the cyclists into it.
But if there's a manhole lid or a fucking plastic bag in the road, they'll swerve into oncoming traffic to avoid it.

>>1093365
>I love how they don't consider any hazard that's a hazard to cyclists an actual hazard unless it would also be a hazard to them.

Uh, yeah. That's basically how it works. I don't consider a brick falling on my head during my working day, because I'm not working on a construction site. Odd, that.

>>1093380
>is so stupid that he doesn't realize the difference between a cyclist and a car, both on the same road and the difference between an office worker and a construction worker

Car fags. When will they learn?

>>1093105
What concerns me here is not the mother with her dog, but the group of children just a few meters ahead.
Why're the little shits not camping on the grass, where they aren't a hindrance?
Kids are unpredictable and careless, especially if they're playing around.

>>1093380
Hardly a fair fucking comparison.

>>1093105
>>1093390
i fail to see the problem on that pic. you have brakes you have steering solve it! nice patch of grass on both side if all else fails.

>>1093398
>nice patch of grass on both side
Which is why it makes no sense that they're sitting on the goddamn trail.
>soft grass, easier on their butts
>hard pavement, easier on my road bike tires

>>1093406
this is not a problem nobody will die because of this. just clench your butt cheeks and solve it.

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>>1093125
underrated

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>>1093119
Why not use a bell to alert others in your path?

>>1093421
Most people wear headphones, and the rest just don't give a shit.
I've literally said 'Excuse me!' and you get nothing.

>>1093104
I'm always happy when I see families out riding or hiking or whatever. Always always.

>>1093421
>having a bell
I find it more efficent to just yell "LEFT" or "RIGHT" as loud as possible.

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>tfw passed a lady walking her dog on the way home and said "on your left!" and she pulled her dog to the side and then said "thank you!" when i passed her

felt good man

The little yappy dogs that start running towards the front wheel before the owner yanks it back. I wear a full face DH helmet, I wish one would get in front of the tire.

>>1093447
me too, dudes here really have social issues.
just go behind them, ask for space, smile at them, recieve some smiles back, contiue your ride.
and if youre really going fast then take real rods and stuff. who cares.

>>1093449
I like the angelic chime of my bell

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>>1093519
I got a crane bell
-angelic indeed-
I think a large temple gong would be nice to keep on a front rack
what a statement

>>1093502
only really triggers me when they do it on roads, near me there is a nice loop around a lake
lots of families take their kids out on bikes which is good, but they just let the kids ride all over the road swerving from side to side
seems dangerous plus it fucks up muh strava times
if you are gonna take your kids out on bikes teaching them how to be safe should be a priority, not just oh it's a quiet road he'll be fine

Bad things always happen. If there's someone walking, and you're cycling, they're basically preprogrammed to be wearing headphones, and wandering in your way. That's how the world works. Or if there's a group of people, you'll never get past them. The worst thing always happens for a reason.

>>1093698
What's the reason?

>>1093538
>"large temple gong"
>posts singing bowl
pleb.

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*blocks your path*

>>1093769
I've seen these stupid fucks RUN into 35mph roads with cars clearly coming. Not the panicky confused darting that squirrels do sometimes, that I can understand, but deliberate man on a mission running.
Fuck em all. I wamma bite one some day to teach them who's boss.

>>1093837
I don't get the geese hate. Other than shitting everywhere, I have never seen one act aggressively and I see them year round. They even stand still when they see a cyclist approaching and give you room to pass.

>>1093853
Oh, no. These little fucks stick their tongues our and hiss at you like a fucking cat. And if you're hanging out and you're not looking, sometimes they sneak up and bite your ass.
Truth be told, I love em for it, but you cant deny theyre assholes

>>1093858
Maybe city geese are just nicer in general. I've seen people walking up to goslings to take pictures but the parents didn't give a shit.

>>1093853
>coming up on a goose
>"on your left!"
>"hawwnk!"

>>1093853
when i was a kid the fawns were the same. big mean and prone to act aggressively. nowadays they are perfectly comfortable with people begging food and keeping easy distance from children.

>>1093901
>fawns
*swans fuck

>>1093179
>dat crashing into police car
Guy got balls.
Wonder how smurfs reacted.

>>1093933
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzE-IMaegzQ

>>1093380
Well you see, motorists have to be aware of hazards in the road, immediately in front of them

Cyclists have to be aware of hazards in the bike lane, hazards in the road next to the bike lane, hazards coming from behind them should they need to turn or come out of the bike lane to avoid a hazard in the bike lane, etc. etc. so on and so forth

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>ride down a narrow forest path.
>elderly couple in front of me
>ring my bell while going fast
>ring it again
>the man hears it and makes room for me
>the old woman didn't hear it

RIP

>>1094023
Do you even have a driving license?

>>1093935
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBvvDhEeetc

>>1094044
+1

>>1094044
I certainly do. When I'm out driving I find I zone out/don't remember my travels a lot because it's so boring and also I don't have to worry about as many things like I do when I'm on my bike

Swing that fucker right out of its hinges and ride on.

>>1093769
Qute quackers

>>1093862
he's an actor he's used to that

>>1094085
I see you are on your way to die in a crash.

>>1093769
Hey I live in Blacksburg too, we should hang out

>>1093080
Knew this bloke who rode due to dui.
Hit a car door like op, broke his leg.
When recovered, first ride since accident hit another car door, broke wrist.
Lol cause he was a faggot

London cagers are a menace
but the cyclists are not any better...
Wat do ?

>>1094988
kill self

>>1094988
ride on the sidewalks

>>1094988
Move to a nicer place?

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*blocks your path*

>>1095341
*tokyo drifts through oil*

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*blocks your path*

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>>1095358
*throws autistic fit and runs into the woods*
>REEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...eee...eee..ee..ee..ee..e..e...e.....

>>1095359
>balding this hard
Now I see why he's such an angry person

>>1095362
Nah, I think he was born that way. Being ugly doesn't become a person with no self awareness. Though did you notice the stubble, the bulldog cheeks and that rounded chin? He bears more than a passing resemblance to sieg.
Probably a common developmental disorder, like how mongoloids have distinctive similarities in features.

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*blocks your path*

>>1095468
Kill it

>>1093187
They keep Strava freds away from multi use paths.

>>1093354
That's not my path. I'm riding in the road there.

>>1093769
Guess I wanted to take a different route all along.

>>1094988
Use your freedom of movement to move to a nicer EU country.

Oh, wait..

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*blocks your path*

>>1095472
Transphobic bastard.

>>1095529
Autism phobic

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*blocks your path*

>>1093080
bunny hop that shit

>>1093187
keep pikeys from riding horses and chavs with mopeds

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*blocks your path*

>>1097305
I love this movie so much because all I can imagine is me just hanging out behind him and not throwing a hissy fit and gettigg caught up in his game. Movie wouldn't have happened.

>>1095529
I bet you could do some sikk tricks off of it.

>>1093354
That's not a bike path, that's just the shoulder.

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>>1093935

>>1093104
Just weave through them at 40km/h

>>1098618
>do a 360 turn and ride away

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*blocks your path*
Why do they just allow horses to leave a giant shit on the trail? If I did that I'd get arrested.

>>1093538
a battery powered train horn that is charged by your pedaling

>>1093769
i actually killed one of these while riding.

i was on a narrow as fuck sidewalk because the road was not safe to cycle on. to my left was the road and to my right was a huge fence. i tried to go as slow as possible so the bird wouldnt jump onto the road. it ended up doing just that anyways and got killedki by a car.

i started laughing for some reason and then i felt really awful for what had happened.

>>1098750
I know your pain.
I do trail maintenance for Jeffco open space. I can't tell you how many times I've spent an entire day sweating my ass off regrooming a trail to come back less than a week after it rained to find all my work destroyed by deep horse shoe ruts and literal piles of shit. If you take horses anywhere other than private trails, you need to be be castrated and forced to do trail maintenance for the rest of your faggot equstrian life.

>>1099518
Score one for the good guys

>>1098750
i had to clean some off the trail this morning.
didn't had any tools so used a branch to flick them on the side and kicked some dirt over the remains.

the pile of dung was squarely in front of the ramp for a jump. it's hard to do that unless you do it on purpose but horses are too dumb for that. maybe they were trained to poop on command.

>first time on this board
>it is all about people on bikes thinking they a superior to others because everyone who doesn't use a bike is obviously fat and unhealthy

>>1099829
Find the lie

>>1099757
>come back less than a week after it rained to find all my work destroyed
hey, at least you have job security

>Ruralite: first time time I'd been to city visiting brother, didn't really understand the cycle lane thing, walking to other side of the road on official crossing point, petit woman came at me screaming, very nearly hit me, dodged at last moment. At the time I was pretty hefty at the time, used to running sheep and an turning youngstock gotta be pretty physical they ain't always the friendliest, if I'd not dodged and grabbed the bike instead like my first reaction, I do wonder how badly it would've gone for her.
>haven't really been back there since.

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>>1099518

>fuckwits feeding pigeons on the canal towpaths
>literally knee deep in flying rats
>slow down until they fly off
>start getting up to speed again
>kamikaze pigeon flies like half a meter and does a u-turn
>straight in to my spokes
>jammed in forks
>not going fast enough to OTB but still smash my dick in to the stem

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>1095356
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5AZ8yYHNts

>>1101137
DEJA VUUU

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>riding on a main road with loads of construction work going on in the middle (pic related)
>two lanes for each direction normally, now one is blocked
>stick to the rules and ride on the unblocked lane, doing 30km/h or so
>car behind me honks
>What can I do
>honks again
>There is no bike path
>honks again
>There would be enough room behind the barrier, but that is illegal
>honks again
>pull over to the sidewalk, give *ironic* thumbs up to the passing driver
>ride another 50m or so before finally, the bike path begins

>few days later
>going the same route again
>just ride on the blocked lane behind the barrier
>no one is bothering me
Fuck traffic rules and cagers

>>1093111
Is that Toronto ? The multi use lane thing isn't really working imho - tourists don't get it and cyclist just bomb through it.

>>1101199
Cagers arent logical. You coukd be doing 80mph on your bike and they'd still flip the fuck out because they cannot be near a bike.

>>1101199
Looks like they're building something more useful than another bike lane.

>>1101238
You are probably right
>>1101461
They are renewing old tram/light rail tracks from 1974 or something. They are also extending the platforms. Yes, our trams need platforms.

>>1101199

How the fuck are you people getting honked at? Ive been riding for a while and have done a some crazy shit but people here don't honk at me (even though I live in a honk-happy city).

Are you guys like really small and lanky?

>>1093187
These things exist to diversify your hobbies and give lockpickers something to do while aimlessly wandering on these paths.

>>1101504
6'1" A E T H L E T I C and like I said, I rode in the only available line and no one could get past me.

>>1101511

bulk the fuck up

>>1101512
I literally can't. All the food shoots right through as is, I have to take thyroid hormones, and am currently suffering from tendonitis, so I am very limited as to what sports I can do.

>>1101513

Oh my. Bless your heart - stay safe.

>>1101504
Doesnt matter how big you are, little dicked fuckbois in cars always think theyre bigger

>>1101546

So true, it always seems like the weakest ppl tend to act out the most. Anywhoo, I think that people will be fine (i.e. not honked at) as long as they're defensive/aggressive, fast, and built. :')

>>1100986
BAN ASSAULT SPOKES

>>1101549
Disagree. All you need to do to get honked at is be on a bike; regardless of where or how you're riding

>>1093480
>RIDER BACK
>RIDER BAAAACK
>MOVE LAOWAI

>>1101683
Fine with this

>>1101683
Dis wy u need u car

>>1101692
I'm sure you are faggot

>riding bike down semi-residental street
>car ahead of me, keeping my distance
>car suddently stops
>i put the brakes on my bike
>car starts backing up
>much harder for a bike to go in reverse
>almost hits me

FUCK DRIVERS

>>1101718
I graduated middle school, that's how it goes.

>>1101751
It goes in your ass too I guess.

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>>1101137
used to do this with my mates on gravel roads with mountain bikes. oh, how time flies...

>>1101719

I was knocked off my m/o/torbike by a guy doing this...

He had a ton of shit on his parcel shelf and couldn't see out the window. Once he realised what had happened he was super apologetic. Turns out he was literally parking up outside his house so we went inside to talk details. Guy immediately pressed a bottle of whisky in to my hands and agreed to pay for any damages. Ended up staying for dinner, met his wife.

Still bros today. He bought a bike himself recently and we're going on a tour next month.

>>1101759
Am I invited to the wedding?

>>1094988
Rent van.

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>>1093187

>>1093698
>>1093745
Murphy's Law

>>1102142
the best thing also always happens by that logic.

For avoiding bad situations, just have to reduce probability enough that we're safe (subjective) for the duration of activity.

E.g. Ride slow around people. Avoid people. Minimise trips. Avoid traffic. Bring spare tube. Eat vegetables now and then.

>Got in MY way
>Blocked MY way
>Getting in MY way
>Blocked ME
>Blocking ME
>Slowing ME down

You people are so fucking self-centered it is almost unbelievable, how about you stop riding at 65 down fucking footpaths?

>>1102259
Youre retarded

>>1102259
YOU are retarded

>>1102259
If you are moving down the road, if something moves into your path, they are getting in your way, since you have right of way as the moving object.

>>1093080
Throw the bike at his windscreen

>>1093862
Nope. Lived car free in Northern Virginia for a year and can confirm geese will fuck your shit up.

>>1093480
when i say that people look at me like im crazy

>>1093480
>>1104413
I have never heared of people doing this before this thread.

>>1093080
I front flip over one of these and landed pretty much on my feet. Dude paid for a new wheel. It turned out pretty good.

>tfw blocked by two separate people within half a mile walking their bikes up a very mild hill

I think I might have scared the first one. The cager traffic was too heavy on the road so I passed her from the grass separating it and the sidewalk.

>>1093080
You better pay for my new door

>>1093769

>cycling through park to get to destination
>suddenly leaf-geese everywhere
>enough of a gap to get through
>goose moves into path
>goose spreads wing angrily
>goose does not realize I weigh 30x as much and am traveling at 15-20mph
>impact wing with my leg, I keep rolling on no fucks given
>probably broke its shit and crippled it for life
>fucker deserved it

Fuck leaf-geese. Aggressive shits. They've assaulted me while /out/ too, dumbasses. There are no environment-police innawoods to save them. I want to infect them with rabies or smallpox or something right before they go back to cucknada.