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Oh my Celestia, are you getting hard? Well you might as well

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Thread replies: 112
Thread images: 34

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Oh my Celestia, are you getting hard? Well you might as well take it out, show me what you can do with it.

And don't forget to play with those balls too, I want to see a show!
>>
>>22135544
You have a small futa cock for such a large filly.
>>
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>>22135544
But you are gonna laugh at my average 5 inch dick
>>
>>22135544
Masturbation encouragement thread please!
>>
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>>22135572
Smaller is cuter though, as long as it isn't too small.
>>
>>22135544
Stop trying to pretend you're straight Rainbow Dash. It's OK. Lesbians are hot
>>
>>22135627
Stop throwing your lesbian ideals onto best poni, shitlord.
>>
>>22135572
I thought six inches was the average.
>>
>>22135627
>A lesbian Rainbow Dash and male Anon are fuckbuddies
>He pounds her while spewing compliments
>She doesn't care that he's a dude, she's just getting truned on by the praise
>>
>>22135657
It's actually 5.5
>>
>>22135657
my guess, either that Anon doesn't live in the U.S., or he's using a world average to feel a bit better
>>
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>>22135676
>Thinking the US average is 6 inches
kek
>>
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>>22135676
I am a mexicunt, so I don't know exactly what is half an inch. Perhaps I am half an inch too.
Still
>Just average dick
>>
>>22135692
1.25 cm is a pretty easy way to look at it
>>
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>>22135692
Use the google converter to go from cms to inches.

In any case, it's average for a reason. Be glad that you are much more likely to be able to fit your dick inside a hole to the hilt without discomfort to the other person, unlike larger dicks, which I've heard from a reasonable amount of people that it can become a problem having to hold back going balls deep. Girth is what matters most, not length.
>>
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Lol. You guys got tiny dicks
>>
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>>22135707
Well then I probably have an average girth too. How do you measure it? You take the diameter with some ruler or you use some flexible thingy to measure all of it?
>>
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>C-Come on you pervert, I know you like to smell my wonderbolt suit when no-ponies looking
>Did I tell you to stop jerking? I want to see you cum!
>>
>>22135722
Two ways: Measuring tape, or a piece of string or anything like it.

Obviously the measuring tape is the easiest to do with since you get the size right there. If you don't have that but you do have a piece of string, just fit it around, see where one side of the string meets the other, then put it on a flat surface and measure that with a regular ruler.

It is also recommended that you measure your girth at three places: the base of the glans, the middle of the shaft, and the base of the shaft, then get the average of those 3 and you have your average girth.
>>
>>22135685
I highly, highly doubt the validity of that map.
Do you know how difficult it is to get any reliable penis size data? Extremely.
Biggest dick data in shitholes like Venezuela, Sudan, and Columbia? Buuuulllllshhiiiiiiiit.
And these are supposed to be averages. There isn't any data in the entire history of the world that suggests an 18 cm average is even possible outside of a room full of porn stars or liars.
>>
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>>22135744
>If it is a third world country, it can't have a population with larger dicks
You realize the stupidity of that mutual exclusivity, right?
>>
>>22135752
Considering the lower likelihood of accurate reporting, significant sample sizes, and even proper nutrition, it makes perfect sense.
>>
>>22135752
Would kinda help if you gave sources of that map though.
>>
Somebody post the pic where Twilight was pissed at Anon for jerking off for her and all her friends encourage him.
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>>22135707
>be happy it's average
>which I've heard

hahahahaha. small dicked virgin cuck trying to say 'b-b-but big dicks aren't great'
>>
>>22135727
More like this is needed.
>>
>>22135809
>virgin & cuck
That seems unlikely.
And stop using buzzwords.

Anyway, if you consider measurements of vagina depth (a subject which may be worth looking into)(hue) the situation becomes more clear.
An 8 inch dick in a 3 inch pussy is an awkward situation.
>>
>>22135904
stop with the geometry nerd. an experienced woman isn't going to have a problem with a 8" dick.
>>
>>22135975
>>22135904
A woman is capable of squeezing an infant out of her crotch, so the vagina is quite capable of taking a pounding.

Although, I feel we should quit talking about dick size and contribute to the thread. More posts like this please

>>22135727
>>
>>22135809
How to spot a virgin: Person who thinks porn-sized dicks are average and any woman can easily take them, especially when it's their first time.

I'm sorry you have only been with whores who already had their vaginas stretched a lot before by other dicks.
>>
>>22136125
>Implying he has even fucked once
He is probably just talking shit to piss us off.
>>
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>>22136172
Most likely. I still wanted to have some fun with him with whatever he replied.
>>
>>22136125
i'm confused by you statement. i find it lacking in reading comprehension.

it at first implies that I'm a virgin but then says all I've fucked are whores that have stretched pussies (which might also imply that you think i have a big dick because of the previous statement that women can't take large penises unless being stretched out)

let me say that i in no way implied i thought porn star dicks are average and that virgin pussies can it eat up faster than the sarlac pit.
>>
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>>22135904
>>
>>22136202
>talks about comprehension
>spouts incomprehendible shit
>being this goddamn defensive
>>
>>22136314
you're the one that got mad first cuck
>>
OK, you can either take a romantic bath with Rarity, or join Rainbow Dash in the shower after a sweaty workout. Both involve hours of pony sex. Also, they will snuggle you all night in their pony beds afterwards.
>>
>>22136218
I wonder if this is a real thing, if it is, his wife is a bit of a cunt
>>
>>22136352
Can I cum inside Rainbow Dash? If so, then that one.
>>
>>22135544
OOC Dash thread?
>>
>>22136352
>>22136440
if this is a writefag asking for a vote then rarity. there's been a gorillian dash stories in the past week
>>
>>22136453
Honestly, I wouldn't mind seeing green for the OP. It can be Rarity too though. Just lurking this thread for the keks.

>>22136440
I'm this guy.
>>
>>22136352
Although sweaty Dash sounds good, any shower she'd use would probably be pretty gross.
I'll go with Rarity.
>>
>>22136849
we won't have anything if we let the thread die.
>>
>>22135544
>My fetish finally gets its own thread
>>
>>22135657
>>
>>22136218
Cut out the shit about black men and add a dash of femdom and this is totally my fetish. If a black man touches my wife I'll kill him.
>>
>>22137133
but i guess white men can huh? cuck
>>
>>22137159
Only if my wife prompts it and then the man promptly fucks off. It may be a fetish but I wont let that shit evolve into anything more than an occasional thing.

Only reason I like it at all is because I have a femdom fetish. But outside the bed room its an equal thing she gets uppity and pushes to far I kick her out.
>>
>>22137159
>>22137133
>>22137099
This conversation died off already, or so I thought.

Tell me, am I really about to do this?
Not sure if I'm going to continue.

>"Oh my Celestia, are you getting hard? Well you might as well take it out, show me what you can do with it."
>The marshmallow colored pony says seductively, taking a seat to watch.
>"And don't forget to play with those balls too, I want to see a show!" She adds.
"W-what?" You question with a stupefied look.
>"Oh, you heard me darling. Now come one; no pun intended, let's see it!"
>With a face as red as an apple, you start to slowly take off your pants.
>Are you really about to do this?

If I don't continue, is anyone going to write this? I'm interested in he idea
>>
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>>22137099
>My country's average is 7 inches
>I'm a 5.5
Well, even more reason for me to move the hell out of here.
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>>22137254
If its a self reported country shave off an inch to 2 inches
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>>22137262
Nope, measured one.
>>
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>>22137247
Please anon I need this. /mlp/ is so devoid of femdom that it hurts me.
>>
>>22135685
I read this in inches and immediately went wtf. 9in dicks...
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>>22137263
I'm so sorry anon.
>>
>>22137280
I can give it a try, but, I doubt I can make it exactly to your taste. I'm not into femdom myself, but the OP's kind of thing is interesting to me.

Not to mention, I've never written anything related to clop.
>>
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>>22137099
>Tfw the UK is extremely close to the bottom
>Tfw we're still bigger than America
>>
>>22137358
Its listed alphabeticallyYou limy bastard
>>
>>22137380
Well, now I feel like an idiot...
>>
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>>22137296
Eh, it's not that bad actually. My country instead runs a severe problem of short people, and a rather bad-looking color of skin, neither of which I have because my family has a lot of European descendency, so I partly guess my dick size comes from that, which according to that graph, a lot of European countries are closer to my size.

I am tall and look like I just have a minor tan, so I'd be happy to move somewhere else and blend in better.
>>
>>22137351
First time for everything. Rule one from another writefag write what YOU are interested in. Sure throw in something for the anon's but don't let them dictate it.

Also for femdom its not always about whips and chains. Its about control. As long as the female is clearly in control and leading things even if shes getting fucked its femdom.
>>
>>22137395
Use that to your advantage. Dick size is secondary at best. If you look half way decent and are confidant your dick size wont matter.
>>
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>>22137057
It's my fetish too, Anon! I love joi videos, and I remembered a fending thread where all the mane 6 were encouraging Anon to jerk off for them.
>>
>>22137099
On the one hand I'm feeling pretty good, on the other no one but I will ever know so meh
>>
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>>22137099
Feels good knowing I have an above average 7.5" penis.

Too bad I'm a gayfag.
>>
>>22137439
I probably would, but I have a lot of other reasons for wanting to move out, so I won't want to take advantage of those things here. Still, it does feel nice to have that going for me.

>>22137494
What are you talking about? Gay men tend to love longer dicks. Women having the cervix to limit the size of their vagina usually makes them not want dicks so big.
>>
>>22135685
Question, what does the grey color mean?
>>
>>22137580
I assume no data for those countries.
>>
I assumed it was the largest size since almost all of Africa was covered in grey.
>>
>>22137263
They don't tell the sample size here.
Even the measured values aren't necessarily trustworthy. Ten guys show up who are especially proud of their dicks and bam- new national average.


This data seems more reliable.
http://imgur.com/a/3r5sH#0
>>
>>22137528
Just that I don't get a lot of action because I don't have a bf right now and I'm not into casual sex.

If you think it's hard to find a good relationship when you're straight, imagine how hard it is when you have only a fraction of the population to work with.
>>
>>22137680
>not being bisexual master race
>>
>>22137692
Being bisexual does not help. At least in my area all I ever get is "You cant chose both anon your either gay or straight."

What is even worse though is being a submissive man. That shit will kill 99% of any relationship. I've lost at least 4 girls right when I said "I like for my partner to take control."
>>
>>22137725
>I've lost at least 4 girls right when I said "I like for my partner to take control."

The feminist movement would make you think that they want to be strong, dominant womyn, but when it comes time for bed, they always want to be submissive bitches.
>>
>>22137779
No the modern feminist movement wants you to give them everything they want without question.

Seriously watch how fast they shut up when you ask them their opinion on men making the first move or men paying for dates. They only want what directly benefits them.
>>
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>>22137692
You can choose both.
>>
>>22137860
>Using anything ever made by Yahtzee to prove any kind of point
kek
>>
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>>22137874
>>
>>22137883
wat
>>
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>>22137672
>Less condom breakage at smaller sizes
Well there's something obvious that I somehow hadn't thought of. Less risk of STDs and/or pregnancy at smaller sizes, I'll take it.
>>
>>22136352

Dash.
>>
>>22135544
>And don't forget to play with those balls too, I want to see a show!

Balls don't get nearly enough love
>>
>>22137351
I hope based writefag isn't kill.
>>
>>22138034
Maybe he's writing as we speak...
>>
>>22135544
>Oh my Celestia, are you getting hard?
Read as
>Oh Celestia, are you getting hard?
And then
Oh my, Celestia, are you getting hard?
Which are very different.
>>
>>22138134
>>22138034
I am not kill, tell me how bad it is. Maybe one more scene, and I think I'll stop there.

Enjoy.

>>22137247
>As your pants finally drop to the ground,your dick bobs around; hard as diamonds.
>You see Rarity eyeing it, mouth almost watering.
>She contains herself and her eyes return to your face.
>"Well? You going to start playing with it? If you want me to do it for you, you'll have to work for that."
>Well Anon, you heard her.
>You sit back in the chair that was behind you and do as she says.
>Starting out slow, she continues to watch.
>"Why don't you try speeding up? You don't seem all that into it yet, do you need some inspiration?"
>She stands and backs up towards the wall, sitting back against it.
>Before she spreads her legs, she puts a hoof over her marehood, teasing you.
>She gives it a quick rub before revealing it to you.
>"Ah, there you go. Now you're going a little faster" she says smiling. "Better keep a steady pace, don't want you to cum just yet."
>As you continue to stroke, she starts rubbing her clit.
>You can feel a pressure rising in your dick.
>She was getting into it as well.
>Her breathing started getting heavy, and she was going faster.
>"Oh. Anon you look really into it now."
>Her voice sent you just over the edge.
>You start stroking much faster as your semen shoots out onto your shirt.
>"Hey, I didn't say you could cum yet," she says with a deviant smile.
>She gets up and walks over.
>Putting the tip of your dick into her mouth, you remove your hand.
>Just the feeling of having your dick in her mouth sends shudders through your body.
>Removing the shirt, she starts bobbing up and down with it in her mouth.
>"Does that feel good Anon? Maybe these could use some action too."
>She brings her hoof up and starts playing with your balls too.
>How it felt good, you'll never know.
>>
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>>22138174
>>
Kek, rainbow was talking to a futa Celestia.
>>
>>22138174
Damn, son. Worth the wait.
>>
Y-you're not d-done yet?!? I've came t-three times already!

It's been 10 f-fucking minutes, where are you g-getting all this s-s-staminaaaAAAAHHHHHHOHMIGOSHHHH!!!!
>>
>>22136352
I'd have to say Dash, of course.
Have you all seen http://rule34-data-002.paheal.net/_images/21737a1c01295c06ac252e4b7c257b2e/1156243%20-%20mlp%204chan%20Anonymous%20Equestria_Girls%20Friendship_is_Magic%20LiveSmutAnon%20My_Little_Pony%20Rainbow_Dash.jpg

Also if somebody has a better URL for that or can upload it to imgur that would be cool. I was just browsing paheal and found LSA
>>
>>22138238
>10 minutes
>Long
Come on. I know horses average about 12 seconds but come on.
>>
>>22138327
I think he's trying to make himself feel better.
>>
>>22138363
Welcome to every single erotic MLP fanfic ever. It's so annoying to read that my subconscious developed its own headcanon saying that ponies evolved out of that and can last as long as humans because they don't need to do it for survival reasons.
>>
>>22138440
Oh I know. Its why anon has to be 100% super alpha anon who fucks all the bitches or /mlp/ freaks out and abandons threads.

It would be funny if it wasn't so sad.
>>
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>>22135544
>>
>>22138461
He's either too cool for school or so beta the 80's are calling him out for being an out-dated format
>>
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>>22138469
>>
>>22138174
>Lifting her head, your dick falls out of her mouth.
>She pulls her self up till she is above you.
>"I think I might as well take some pleasure in this as well."
>Reaching down she lifts your dick up and lowers her body down on top of it.
>As you enter her, your entire body shakes from the ecstasy.
>"I take it that it feels good inside me?"
"Y-yes."
>She smiles triumphantly as she brings herself further down.
>You're dick is pretty far inside her now.
>She lets out a moan as she gets it all the way in.
>Then she goes back up, and starts riding faster.
>After a short time, you can feel yourself already reaching your climax again.
>"Anon, I want you to cum inside me" she moans.
>Oh Celestia.
>That sent you over the edge again.
>You can feel your dick filling her.
>She moans louder.
>"Oh, that's a lot Anon."
>She slows down until your dick stops throbbing.
>Lifting herself up, she lets your dick slip out of her.
>Dripping with your seed, she gets off the chair.
>She puts your dick back in her mouth and cleans it off.
>All in all, great day.

This part feels short, but maybe not too bad.

First clop attempt, what would you rate it?
>>
>>22138484
I think is deserves a steady 7/10. That's pretty good for your first time.
>>
>>22138478
I just don't understand why /mlp/ cant be a cool guy and use green to explore their fetishes instead of for self inserting. Let everyone have their own greens and don't flip shit when a write fag writes something that's not your exact fetish.
>>
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>>22138484
A solid 7/10 but only because its kinda short. If it was a good 3 or 4 full posts it would be 8/10. You have a lot of potential.
>>
>>22138498
Or maybe Anon is essentially a self-insert disguised as an OC, so sometimes the writer is a complete fag about it and soils the story.
>>
>>22138515
>>22138484
On that note do you have a pastebin I can follow?
>>
>>22138478
So beta that John Cusack stands outside his window with a boombox.
So beta that Jon Cryer bosses him around
So beta that Andrew McCarthy still chose the mannequin over him.
>>
>>22138515
>>22138497
I feel so accomplished for some reason. The thread I normally write for is a dead circlejerk now. I'm not used to getting a response at all.
Even when people were there

>>22138550
Yeah, I'll make a pastebin for this too.

http://pastebin.com/u/a10

Just so you know, the Ties that Bind one was shit, and won't be continued.
>>
>>22138552
So beta that they give rise to both positrons AND electrons silmutaniously
>>
>>22138522
The writer is not always at fault its /mlp/. specifically the submission is mandatory thread among others have been straight up abandoned and remade because a writefag wrote a submissive anon that was being dominated.
>>
>>22138600
I'm ok with that in moderation, and depending on how it's written, but most of the time it's like they want 50 shades of grey only even more submissive
>>
>>22138585
If you get into clop more focus on one fetish until you get a good handle on it. Like I said you have a good chance of becoming one of /mlp/'s more beloved write fags if you keep it up and don't turn into a fag. Only thing I could see being a limiting factor is how often you post. /mlp/ is greedy like that.
>>
>>22138637
I try to post often, even when motivation is low. Clop is kind of fun to write for the hell of it, but I like serious stories more. I might be able to do better if I add some clop, with some standing feelings too.

All in all, just happy that for once I could make someone happy with my writing.

I'll be in Twimom, but, if I see an interesting prompt; I might try it out. Glad I tried this.
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