Archived threads in /mlp/ - My Little Pony - 661. page

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>>30029567
fuck was election day today?

>>30029567

Sorry, I didn't think more Diamond Tiara was good back then but now that I know the new guys in the block I'm regretting it.

I'm not the little filly

>Be Anon
>Freshly arrived in Ponyland
>And you are being carted to jail for what was apparently public indecency whilst in the presence of royalty
>Why these little colorful horses consider wearing socks in public to be indecent is beyond you
>The royalty in question wasn't exactly complaining either
>You glance out the window of the carriage they've got you in and see a structure that looks vaguely like your old middle school
>Surrounded with tall fence
>Well, tall for them at least
>The carriage passes through a gate and approaches the building
>...wait, is this-?
>"On your feet, criminal!"
>The guard who'd been riding with you had been doing his best to be as far from you as possible
>They considered you a perv
>Can't say you'd blame them, considering you essentially appeared out of nowhere in the middle of their seat of government wearing what was, in their culture, essentially women's lingerie
>Still, he could tone down the attitude
>It's not like you knew
>You you get out of the carriage and check out your surroundings
>Yep, looks exactly like a middle school
>"Get moving, creep!"
>The guard pushes the back of your leg in an attempt to get you mobile
>You whip your head around and glower at him
"Fuck off, man. This is bullshit! Socks are perfectly normal to wear where I'm from!"
>The guard freezes
>Shit
>You said too much
>Well, here comes the first ass-kicking of your prison career
>The guard starts crying
>Wait, wat

>>30025140
>The guard's just staring up at you with tears in his eyes, sniffling
>"YOU MONSTER!"
>You turn, to see one of the horses pulling the coach angrily pointing at you
>"How could say such mean things?! You're going away for a long time!"
>...
>You subdued a prison guard
>With rude words
>Fuck this place, logic isn't a thing here
>While your brain was rendered inactive out of the sheer absurdity, a bunch of other guards had emerged from the building
>[Collective horse gasp]
>"What'd you do, you big ugly monkey?!"
>Ho fuck no
>You ain't about to take that from some punkass little horse
"I told him how /fucking/ stupid this whole situation is! I'm wearing socks because my feet get cold without them, not because I'm perverted! In fact, you assholes are the perverts, getting turned on by socks!"
>You're being a hypocrite, you love girls in knee socks
>Still, all you had on were normal ones
>These horses were definitely the ones in the wrong here
>Speaking of, they're reeling from your little tirade
>"S-so foul mouthed! Restrain him! Bring him in for processing!"
>You utter the time-honored battle cry of angry 20-something men
"COME AT ME BRO!"
>Unfortunately for the little weenie horses, you lift
>You bowl through the little group like ninepins, shrugging off the couple that clung to you
>...
>Isn't this going a little too well? How are they able to restrain their prisoners if they can't even-
>ZAP
>You hit the ground like a sack of potatoes, unable to move
>What just happened?
>Why are you paralyzed?
>"Is everypony alright?"
>"Warden! Thank goodness! We've got a nasty one here."

>>30025145
>Be Warden Sharp
>You were never sure why your parents named you that
>But boy, does it fit your job!
>You were in charge of the most secure prison in the Canterlot area, tasked with rehabilitating the hardest criminals in Equestria
>And you loved it!
>You believed everyone can make friends
>Even this new inmate
>Certainly, his crimes were rather icky, and his show of violence towards the guards was scary, but that's why you're here! To help him onto the right path!
"Are we all alright, gentlecolts? He really put a thumping on you!"
>Key Ring salutes
>"Afraid not, ma'am. We've got some boo-boos."
"Oh no!"
>He gestures to a few crying guards, being comforted by their friends
"Get them to the infirmary! We'll handle the inmate."
>The officer taps your shoulder, leaning in to whisper
>"This one's the nastiest I've ever seen, Miss Warden. I don't think he should be around the other inmates."
"Nonsense! Anypony can be reformed, Key Ring! We just have to remember the teachings of our... princesses..."
>You trail off as you notice Key Ring staring at something behind you, mouth agape

>Be Anon, a few moments earlier
>You've regained some control of your body, but what just happened?
>You'd assumed you'd been hit with a taser or something, but it didn't hurt
>So what was it?
>You slowly climb to your feet, shaking off some grogginess and becoming aware of someone talking behind you
>You turn to see one of the guards you thrashed earlier and a unicorn
>Still not as weird as those giant white and blue ones you saw earlier, but still weird
>The guard's just staring at you
>"Nonsense! Anyone can be reformed, Key Ring! We just have to remember the teachings of our... princesses..."
>She trails off as she realizes that he isn't listening, and turns to face you
>Her jaw drops
>"You...wha...how..."
"What'd you just hit me with?"
>The little horned horse squeaks in response
>"M-magic?"
>Magic?
>Seriously?
>A bold-faced lie if you've ever heard one

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The first of them you see when you hop onto your turf is Seaweed, sitting on the roof of her shack and "Staring" onto the sea, her ears twitching every once in a while.
The second is Herb, who isn't shy about posing on your head to give you an upside down look, "Don't die a hero, will you?"
"Huh?"
"That it'd be sad for me to be the only Equestrian here, yes? Or for this sorry parrot to be left without a captain."
You start answering, but bear hug makes it into a weak wheeze instead.
"You idiot." Cas grabs you with more strength than a mare her age oughts to have, "Don't run off like that again."

2/2
There was user input I left off these posts to keep it from being twice as long, pic related.

>>29958071
Whoa easy, we couldn't let that thing come up under the ship.

>>29958071
S-sorry. Fear makes ponies do things. It's gone right?

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>>29904810
>>29904862
"Certainly, Your Highness, how can I be of service?" You ask, tilting your head a bit.

Luna looks at you blankly for a moment before letting out a sigh. "Why doth the cute ones always be the thick ones?" She mutters, making your ears twitch.

"Fair Winds, thou hath Our permission to use Our name, though We wish that thou do so soon, if only so that We may stop using the Royal We and speak more naturally." Luna says flatly, and you blink in surprise.

"... Of course, Luna." You say. "I wasn't awa-"

"No one is." She sighs. "It's a bad holdover from when I was Nightmare Moon. Tis a long story, and frankly, a bit of a mess for me to piece together in the first place. Now, I understand that mine and mine sister's niece were in here moments ago, hence thou's mane and tail, and I'm quite sure that all of the traditional threats of harm of the suitor of one under the care and beloved by their others hath been given." Luna says, and you nod along in confirmation.

"Very Good! That means that I can skip that part and get straight to the important bit- explaining to you how to win fair Twilight's heart, though thou already seem to have thine hoof in the door!"

>>29921894
Why thank you luna.

>>29921945
"Um... thank you?" You say, a bit bewildered at Luna's actions as the Mare of the Night (no connection to the other kind of 'mare of the night') spreads a wing over you and pulls you aside, walking you to the cushions you and Cadance had been occupying earlier.

"Now, prithee, tell me, dear Fair Winds, how doth thou wish to woo thy mare?" Luna asks, her eyes sparkling. "During the night of course tis best, fair Cadance is quite good at making recommendations, but she forgets the effects of a full moon 'pon a colt and a filly."

>applebloom will never actually spend time with big mac again.

Fuck that shit, wheres my Discord and Pinkie Pie episode!?

>>30058470
>You will never be as famous as Donald J. Trump

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>>30058022
Someone posted a thing about how "Princess Starlight" wasn't copyrighted but "Princess X" (X = some other name that hasbro originally wanted to use) was
So yeah, a real possibility

>>30058171
any link/source to this?

Memiest of all memes. Everyone knows it's never gonna happen but people will still pretend it might

>>30057991
Mando already deflowered them

>>30057991
Scoot
She's the oldest

>>30057991
They've forged a virginity pact to ensure that none of them get left behind. If a stallion wants to deflower one of them, he has to deflower all of them.

>>30056975
Nobody cares

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http://www.iconixbrand.com/
They seems to own a number of clothing lines, like Joe Boxer and London Fog. And Zoo York.

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When a company spends $345 million on something, you know there's going to be a follow-up. This may also mean letting the air out of current projects. Could this mean the end to MLP?

-
Halifax-based DHX Media Ltd. is spending $345 million US to buy the rights to the characters of the Charles Schulz classic Peanuts and to the cartoon series Strawberry Shortcake.
The deal will see DHX buy the entertainment division of Iconix Brand Group Inc., which includes an 80 per cent controlling interest in Peanuts and a 100 per cent interest in Strawberry Shortcake, according to a company news release.

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>>30056652
SHOVE A SPORK IN YOUR EYE

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>>30056652
Oh, ok, thanks for telling me how I'm supposed to think.

>>30056652
the point of this episode was Dash natural state of being a cunt

>>30056491
That fucking episode is almost unbearable

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>>30056491
SPEAK UP, BOI. I don't understand the language of faggots.

>>30056491
>"LEAVE ROLF, SQUARE-PEG-IN-THE-ROUND-HOLE EDBOY!"

So do I but why do I feel like this thread is secretly being ironic?

I agree OP. season 5 was a good one

>>30056268
I miss season 5

>>30056082
>Breeder
What the fuck did you just fucking type about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class at MIT, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids with Anonymous, and I have over 300 confirmed DDoSes. I am trained in online trolling and I’m the top hacker in the entire world. You are nothing to me but just another virus host. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on the Internet, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with typing that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we chat over IRC I am tracing your IP with my damn bare hands so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your computer. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can hack into your files in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in hacking, but I have access to the entire arsenal of every piece of malware ever created and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the world wide web, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking fingers. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit code all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

>>30056082
Thanks for killing a thread for this shit.

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>>30056123
Oh no, which one was it?
"This is x barbie, say something nice to her!"
or
"Hello family lads, spoonfeed pls"

>>30056031
>Scoots is not a real filly
>She's a genetic experiment
>A FAILED genetic experiment, which explains the complete inability of her wings to sustain fly
>The scientists wanted to create the perfect pegasus, able to fly in all weather conditions
>When things went wrong they dumped her in Ponyville
>Just before the disbandment of the Agency.
>She has no past
>she has no future.
>She's "FILLY X"
>[theme song plays]

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>>30056031
According to Faust, she have parents. Later Big Jim said that he will keep that in the canon.

>>30056053
Sometimes Faust's vision is wrong. Scoots having no parents is accepted wholy by almost everyone. Is it wrong to include an orphan in a kid's show or something?

>>30055850
>rape

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>>30055850
just aim at mare that isn't already in love

>>30055860
That's my plan too...
She can't unrape herself so I'd still win.

>>30055785
Or y'know... a spearwielding guardpony.

>>30056334
>naming your son after the career path he doesn't even know he's good at until he earns his cutie mark

>>30056440
This is the problem with many ponies.

How did they know Rainbow Dash would be fast? How did they know Fluttershy would be shy? How did they know Scootaloo would scoot? How did they know Shining Armor would be a guard? How did they know Big Mac would be big? etc.