Who else /no friends/ ?

I had tons of friends in college but all the good ones moved away after grad and I got tired of hanging out with the casuals who thought this shitty place was worth hanging around in.
I only moved to this crappy flyover city for college and I don't plan on living here the rest of my life so I'm not going to bother getting close with any of the local retards.
Instead I'm using my free-time for self-improvement so I can be a cool enough motherfucker to make some decent friends when I finally get wherever the hell I'm going.

To be honest though, I've been kinda procrastinating because I'm a lazy fucking bastard. I enjoy being a hermit a bit too much I think...

Wanting social validation is a good thing.

Needing it to feel self worth is not.

Both are equally important to remember.

>>8690064
I stopped caring for the most part.

I have none irl, but online. That doesn't really bother me though.

>>8690064
I had a LUG that I went to. Got along very well with people there, including outside it, Then social justice warriors from a charity that felt entitled to yank labourmeat from it knocked me out. However many years ago this was...

>>8690064
PICKLE PEPEEEEEEEEEEE
I TURNED MYSELF INTO A PICKLLLLLLLLLLLLE

>>8690064
I just got in a huge fight with my best friend, and now I'm all alone
it's probably for the best, I was never very social

how do y'all have no friends at all? did you not keep in contact with people once you graduated? did you not go out in high school or college?

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Friendship is a spook. The egoist is complete in himself.

>>8690064
I have no friends save for one person online who lives hundreds of miles away.

>>8692668
People move, lives go in different directions, you drift apart.

>>8690064
I have absolutely no friends I haven't had a irl in 3 years and I haven't had an online friend in a little over 1 year

>>8693509
I'm going on 7 years without a IRL friend

shit becomes normal which is rather sad when you think about it

>>8690112
Actually since humans are social animals it's very important to one's psyche that they feel part of a group.

>>8692668
I didn't want anyone to abandon me once I finally started taking hormones so I made no friends.

>>8693519
Same lol

>>8693530
...worst part is how one pretty much forgets how to even socialize, let alone actually making friends. a nasty cycle indeed

Everybody online's looking for hookups and I'm too autistic to make friends in person. I'd pay for a platonic Grindr.

>>8693068
>you drift apart
Only because you let it happen.

I have a few friends who never initiate doing stuff, but as soon as I ask, they'll drive 3 hours to chill at my place for a weekend without hesitation. Someone just actually has to put in a little bit of effort to maintain the relationship.

>>8693538
As one of those people looking for hookups, there are literally always people just looking for friends on Grindr.

>>8693543
I've never tried, I'm really bad at cues and subtext so I figure finding Grindr friends can't go well for me. I've tried /soc/ and some infinitychan boards and with a couple of exceptions they've been manipulative people.

>>8693537
Yep, I joined a LGBT group, I talk to no-one, I'm just in the background in my own little world that I can't escape even if people are trying to talk to me.

>>8693596
that sounds about right.
its a shame no one would understand the situation even if you explained it to them. unless of course they lived it themselves

>near impossible to make friends or date unless you already have friends
>too fucked that talking to people online terrifies me
Is joining a hobby club a meme or worth a shot?
What letter of LGBT are you /no friends/?

>>8693616
im going to assume that unless the hobby club is brand new there will already be the cliques and shit.
still probably better than just sitting in front of a omputer...

T

>>8692591
>>>/r/eddit/

>>8693616
The "just join clubs" normie advice doesn't work because almost all social clubs are aimed at children or the elderly. The few who are aimed at 20 year olds are full of spergs because who else would have no friends at that age.

Sport clubs sometimes have normies our age in them but they are expensive as fuck. Hobby clubs tend to be filled with spergs but even if they are not everyone is purely there for the hobby and go home to their families at the end of the day, they have no interest in making new friends. Finally these clubs tend to only meed once a month, once a fortnight, once a week at most; not enough face time to build bonds with people.
t. Used to join clubs just to make friends, never made any.

>>8692621
It is bad form to hurt your friends, you should apologize.

>>8693620
Oh yeah cliques too, part of the reason why I don't speak to anyone at my LGBT group
>see a bunch of them laughing and joking in a corner
>go up to them and ask a question
>they go silent, one answers it in a dead voice
>they go back to laughing and joking amongst themselves
>i slink off into my own corner.
It's like school all over again.

>>8693691
i wonder . . .
quite honestly going to a courthouse and hanging out with the jury duty pool seems like a better way to make friends. kind of fucked up but most of the logic is sound. i wonder if anyone has tried it....

>>8692591
Literal cancer get the fuck out

>>8693683
Then go be friends with the spergs, sperglord tripfag. Frolic among your people!

>>8690097
Aaaaand this is how you become a recluse.

>>8690097
So you got no friends cause you feel better than your former friends, which are happy with their home-city? While you still live there?
>lazy fucking bastard
Sounds fitting... ugh
>>8692668
Moved away but we still hold contact. Only one local friends who is much older; we meet maybe 2-3x a month.
Also social anxiety, I don't leave the house anymore. Transition reduced the amount of friends to a minimum of 3 and like 10 in my former city, which i meet like once a year. Still a nice crowd but not real friends desu.
>>8693509
I don't get the appeal of online-friends. Yeah, you can share your worries but you'll most likely never meet and I gave up with online-friendships :(
(because I'm stupid)
>>8693616
It's worth a shot and you got my respect for going into larger groups of people.

>>8690064
>Who else /no friends/ ?
I don't. All of my friends are online. Mostly because of the fact I am a mute. Can't really make friends from not talking and simply writing on a board or piece of paper of what I have to say. Now I am just a lonely coder/programmer waiting to die. Actually thinking about it now I consider my boss a friend? We chit chat here and there via text messasging. Has invited me to a drink, but I of course denied because I didn't wanna seem like a bother. Also because we could just text each other while drinking something, I don't know.

>>8693871
if you live in or near a city you could maybe join a club for people who sign? my deaf friend did and she loves it, she's very extroverted and confident though.

>>8693871
Why not learn ASL and join the deaf community?

>>8693941
But I am not deaf. Still though, I doubt I can learn Sign Language. But if they accept whatever I write on a small white board then sure.
>>8693931
Mostly because being a mute and deaf are far different from each other? i don't know.

>>8693754
Ha, true. But I'm going back to school to get a better job to move to a better city... once I'm there I plan on trying some of those group hangout deals like hikes and crap

>So you got no friends cause you feel better than your former friends, which are happy with their home-city? While you still live there?
I "feel better" because I prefer to be sober. This town has nothing going for it except a ton of bars which I got sick of going to and they didn't. Sorry if caring about my healthy and not wanting to pretend I'm still a kid upsets you... not really sorry though.
>ugh
Are you seriously getting buttflustered while defending a boring midwestern flyover?

>>8694014
forgot to link>>8693810

>>8693871
>tfw your voice is so bad you're de-facto a mute.

I've made a few friends through work and IOP (group threrapy). The problem I am having is getting them to hang out, and invite me places. But I'm glad I met ppl. I'm just a wondering what to do as an 18 year old to make friends, who's out of hs

>>8693871
Why are you on lgbt?
Fuck him if that's what you got

>>8694084
I don't think it can be that bad Anon.
>>8694127
Why wouldn't I be? I am a gay mute. I am also not desperate to fuck him.

>>8694019
I might've been a bit too aggressive, but your post just sounded way too snob-ish, a bit too smug, like 'I'm better than youuu'.
There has to be some people who aren't drunk 24/7, right? You already know them, maybe 1 or 2 are still friend-material

>>8693737
>>8693634
Pickle rick is a mod sanctioned meme just check s4s best board
Pickle rickers in the house tonight
Pickle rickles gonna have a good time

>>8694282
I met all my friends in an art school (which explains why I'm now going back for an actually useful degree), so not really no. If they're not drunk then they're stoned or popping pills. Like I said, the good friends left because they were better than that. I would have left too but... shit happens.
I'm sure there are decent people who don't hang out in bars in this town.. problem is they hang out their houses so I'm not likely to meet them.

>>8690064
>Who else /no friends/ ?
ill be ur friend

>>8693737
>Literal cancer
Seems like it belongs here then. :^)

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>>8695470
I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you'll find new friends in the city you're about to move... someday.
Art school sounds actually quiete interesting, and I don't think it's a worthless degree. I have met quiete a lot of people who got all kinds of jobs with a good income, "only" having an art degree. Sure, it won't give you an job immediately like a biochemist for example, but it's not impossible.
Good luck anon. What are you interested in, what do you want to study, if I may ask?

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>>8690064
I used to have people that were interested in me, and now they told me that I don't interest them anymore so I don't have worth as person. So now there's no way for me to gain or regain any friends because they told me that I had been absolved of any interesting qualities.

help...

>>8699980
>and now they told me that I don't interest them anymore so I don't have worth as person.
WTF?!

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>>8700752
Well, he stopped talking to me suddenly and then when he finally responded to me asking why, he said that I "used to be interesting" but that the way that I behave now is boring to him and doesn't suit what he likes. And now we haven't spoken in three weeks.

One of the others still loves me, though.

>>8701093
It's just one person who got bored? How did your behavior become boring?

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>>8692668
>implying I ever had any friends to begin with

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>>8699980
>So now there's no way for me to gain or regain any friends because they told me that I had been absolved of any interesting qualities.
You're a fucking idiot, you know that?

You know how you make friends? You be a nice person and reach out to them. You listen and show genuine interest in them. You spend time with the.

If you want friends, you need to work on your personality.

>>8701286
not him, but
how are you supposed to know what qualities are valuable when you have no social interaction? and wouldn't "working on your personality" mean building a facade of a personality that you show to others that isn't genuine, considering the core of your personality that you've had all these years really isn't changeable?

>>8693689
He's not my friend anymore, and he hurt me plenty

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I dont have any, It's soulcrushing when I think about it so I stay away from it.

Typically coworkers and family see me as a strong diligent person capable of much anything, If only they knew the truth

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>>8699980
Just create more interesting qualities? Stalkerposter... you really just need to become more interesting. You talk about agps and transbisns too much. Perhaps you should get involved into communism and political activism.

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>>8701302
>and wouldn't "working on your personality" mean building a facade of a personality that you show to others that isn't genuine, considering the core of your personality that you've had all these years really isn't changeable?
When I say "work on your personality", I mean just try to be a kind person. That's literally it. If you can't handle that, then you don't even deserve friends.

Cara is an awful person who always belittles and invalidates others. A person like that will just draw slime of the same ilk to them, if anybody.

Why do you think her friend ditched her when he suddenly didn't find her "interesting" anymore? He's trash too.

>tfw your wife is your only friend
I don't think that really counts though. Besides that I haven't had a real life friend since I was 19, but I really don't care.

>>8701843
kindness alone doesn't get you friends. and i don't know who cara is (naturally ive heard of them since ive been on /lgbt/ for longer than a day, i mean ive never cared enough to look into this random tranny on 4chan)

>>8701856
Yes, kindness alone isn't enough. You have to put yourself out there too. I'm just saying what I meant by "work on your personality". The only bad personality is one that hurts others.

Cara is the person I aimed that first post at. She's the one who avatarfags with the Little Witch Academia images.

>>8701867
No one cares about how kind you are if they already have good people in their lives.

You also have to be interesting as well.

>>8701853
>having a SO but no friends
I know it happens, but I can't wrap my head around it.

>>8692621
Story?

>>8701843
she hasnt been mean to me per se, but she refuses sometimes to answer my posts when i get into her issues deep-like and whatnot. she is honestly fascinating and theres a psychiatric diagnostician or neurologist out there somewhere that dreams of putting her brain in a jar

personally its more important to be interesting and not to push your ideas on others. kindness is nice, yeah, but few people are kind and most project and carry their baggage and craziness around and if you make somewhat good friends they end up being either too clingy or too unreliable

Me. I mean, I 'have friends' but they don't like me and they might as well not exist so yeah, no friends.

>>8702060
>I know it happens, but I can't wrap my head around it.
It happened with me, to be fair my SO was my best friend for four years before we dated. After three years of dating they broke it off two months ago, I still can't cope with the loss and have p much been bed ridden for nearly two weeks from stress caused by this and other terrible life shit.

>>8702060
>I know it happens, but I can't wrap my head around it.
This. And married too. Like, doesn't she have friends? Are you Jeff and Hayley?

>>8702074
I'm sorry, anon.

>>8702076
Who?

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>>8702060
>but I can't wrap my head around it
My old high school friends just left me out too much and we grew apart. After that my wife was my only friend for a year or so and we eventually started dating, married. Doesn't help that I work for my family and rarely go into my office. If I did maybe if have a friend or two. Even then, I'm too awkward and quite..but it's no big deal. I've tried friends online, but it lead to stalking.

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>>8702094
Well, I'm glad you're not completely alone. As long as you're content, that's what matters.

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>>8702091
Not them but from American Dad?? Yeah, that's very me.

>>8702109
this show is so good

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>>8702109
Thank you anon! Yes, I'm still pretty happy and content. We are both friendless irl but at least we have each other.

>>8701867
>You also have to be interesting as well.
>as well
The person you mention proves otherwise.

>>8702128
are you transbians? are you trans and she cis girl?

>>8702149
Well, I like cis and trans women. I'm a cis women and she's trans.

>>8702160
I forgot she likes men too but me, not really, no

>>8702164
You just like them with conetits and stubble. KEK

>>8702209
Nah I like full big titties like she has and hairless t b q h but hair is meh since even cis women get hairy, like really hairy. That's why you wax that shit. I'm not super into men, but sissies don't seem too bad. As long as they aren't hairy.

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>>8702221
Now that I think about it, I think cone titties are too cute. Would fondle. I don't care, small, big, in between, a boob is a boob.

friends are overrated. thanks to not having friends, I've only had to leave my apartment a few times in a year, mostly at night

>>8702060
>No one cares about how kind you are if they already have good people in their lives.
Nah, this isn't true. There are always others looking for more friendships.

>You also have to be interesting as well.
Being "interesting" is a matter of who you're speaking to. It's a completely subjective thing. Some people will find you boring as hell while others will find you genuinely fascinating.

>>8702071
>personally its more important to be interesting
See above. I personally think it's better to find the right people who like you as you are then try to change yourself to appeal to others who wouldn't give you the time of day otherwise.

>kindness is nice, yeah, but few people are kind
This is what happens when you spend too much time on 4chan lol. Nah, most people are pretty kind, albeit pretty self-centered.

>>8702135
Quote the wrong post?

>>8690064
>>8690097
me. how do I make friends in college. I'm biromantic asexual and I'm obsessed with videogames but otherwise really well rounded and chill

seriously what do I do

is there a way I can have friends while never having sex and acting really sanctimonious about it but maybe holding hands with trannies sometimes

I don't even know how to find online communities to hang out in to make friends and things anymore.

The last time I joined a group of stuff, I made a 'friend' or two, or at least people who knew my screenname and seemed to like me, but they were social butterflies with 200 other 'friends' to contend with.

I ended up just seething with impotent jealously the entire time. How come this person has cool stories? How come those people are having a cool conversation but my shitty attempts to talk get ignored in chat?

>>8702348
>How come those people are having a cool conversation but my shitty attempts to talk get ignored in chat?
if you know your attempts are being shitty then why don't you make a real attempt? to you hold some sort of internal contempt towards them and resent them for being the way they are and the group that you want to be a part of not existing?

if you won't make a real effort to be a leader and put yourself out there to find people who want to be the way you want to be, then you're going to have to compromise and make a real effort to fit in and make the people you want to interact with comfortable and happy when you're around, even if it makes you sick

>>8702348
I know that feel, whenever I'm in a group I get completly annoyed or people are annoyed by me. I honestly don't know how you can have like 200 online friends

>>8702330
Why the fuck are you acting sanctimonious about it? That's why you have no friends.

>>8703654
because it seriously makes me sad that other people are like that like not even pity or resentment just actual sadness

>>8703723
:'(
so sad

>>8703834
it's pretty sad when they tell me how alone they feel and intimate how they constantly want to kill themselves because they spent their time looking for relationships of convenience and tried to use the ideal concept and idea of love and sexuality to fill a void that was meant to be filled by dreams and aspirations and the acquirement of skills and knowledge to have a way of expressing themselves and defining their contribution to the state of the world and the wellbeing and sustainability of their own lives.

they fuck the wrong person and then the right person doesn't want them

they fuck the right person and find out that it doesn't work because they focused so much on fucking and being with someone that the rest of what their identity is too thin to hold up under the constant scrutiny of any long term relationship

they suffer from a long history of mistakes and regrets and thrills and they oscillate between profound angst and jubilant fleeting hedonism

everything is about needing greater extremes to cure the extremes inside them, until it burns out, and they don't feel anymore, and nothing makes sense

>it's just sex, it doesn't mean anything

congratulations, you decided that it's just sex, and now it doesn't mean anything

so why do you still want it to

you wasted something really important because you wanted to eat the cake before it was finished

now your mouth and your lips are burnt and you can't taste the sugar anymore

>>8702531
They're shitty because they don't ever seem to work, not because i'm purposely making them shitty, I can't really tell on an objective level, i'm just insulting myself.

>>8702325
i dont find "selfish" to be my kind of "kind." people who have some morality and compassion are kind. altruism is a high virtue many people believe they have, but they actually dont. people like myself who are by all outwardly appearances a push over but have strong conviction and yet dont insist on themselves dont exist often because they end up committing suicide or lashing out in frustration.

>try to change yourself
garbage advice. no one should listen to someone who suggests .45 ammunition to hammer a nail. if you give too much of a shit about ingratiating yourself to people, they arent friends. thats what you do when you engage in nepotism. you cant buy love with fakeness and you certainly cant be on even terms with people if you cant be your goddamn self, for better or worse

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>>8706115
>garbage advice. no one should listen to someone who suggests .45 ammunition to hammer a nail. if you give too much of a shit about ingratiating yourself to people, they arent friends. thats what you do when you engage in nepotism. you cant buy love with fakeness and you certainly cant be on even terms with people if you cant be your goddamn self, for better or worse
Oh shit, i used 'then' when I actually meant 'than' lol. I completely agree that changing yourself to be "more interesting" in a desperate attempt to make friends is a terrible idea.

>>8690064
I'm a trans girl and I suspect that's the reason why I have no friends. Or is it the other way around? Either way, I'm feeling very autistic and very lonely. I really do wish I was born as a cute cis girl, so I could be a normie like all the other kids of my generation and at least have a normal if not exciting social life in my youth.

>tfw you turn yourself into a pickle to avoid a family group therapy session