Holy crap....I thought I was gay, but guess I don't know

>>8618869
I know that feel op.

The thing is, I thought I was straight, then I thought I was bi. But the truth is, I just don't feel much of anything at all. I have sex, but it's mechanical and yeah, it feels good, but it isn't magical. And I've never had any trauma in my life, so I don't know why I'm this way. First encounters are always great, because I actually sexually enjoy them, but after that I just kind of quickly lose interest in the sexual aspect but keep doing it because it's okay for me and great for my partner. I don't know what I am, but it fucking sucks man.

>also in my early 30s and have been around a bit to figure things out

>>8618869
The only feelings I've ever had in my life for people have been after I've spent a long time with them. Always friends for at least a few weeks before I get a hint that I'm falling for them. It could be that you haven't spent enough time together.

Also, wtf, do muscular masculine gays actually exist? I'm 23, turning 24, and can only find other bottom bitch lisping faggots. Terrifying and depressing.

>>8619004
We exist and we generally find bottom bitch lisping faggots disgusting.

>>8619015
are you OP?
and i'm trying to not be one. I weigh 92kg at the moment- a bit of gym, but I'm also a massive nerd. I don't say YASSS or have a rainbow flag or any shit like that, but I'm still a total loser who would instantly melt if a big strong man came along to hug me. I still wanna buy flowers and have picnics with a boyfriend, want to sub in bdsm, etc...

I just cannot believe tops actually exist

>>8619015
bitter bottom bitch lisping faggot detected

>>8619021
op here, that wasn't me, but I do feel the same way. I'm pretty discreet and masculine and find myself attracted to the same type of person.

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>>8618869
>I hooked up with a guy I just met and I didn't immediately fall in love with him and have mad passionate porn/rom-com sex, am I not gay? I'm an adult btw, not a retarded teenager who just had sex for the first time which would actually be a legitimate excuse for thinking stupid shit like this.

fucking ridiculous
you deserve this old meme reaction image, OP
YOU DESERVE THIS

>>8619058
actually, This is my first "sensual encounter" with another person. I've had relationships with guys and girls that either never went anywhere or were for quick jerk off/bj's but i've never had an encounter like this before.

>>8619072
...lol

Well, I guess that means you're straight.
Better go get married, OP.

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>>8619076
this

/thread

>>8619058
this 100%
romcoms have ruined people like >>8618892
anon into thinking sex is 'magical'

>>8619076

but i'm not. The only feelings ive ever felt for girls is just a lustful feeling to "get-off" which I recently discovered is the same feeling I feel for other guys too.

There's just no legitimate feeling of infatuation, but the guy I was with apparently felt it. He's been texting me off and on all day, but i'm completely disinterested.

>>8619303
did you ever consider that maybe romantic interest would take a little more time to develop and that possibly your inexperience might be a reason for that?

its kinda like picking up a video game you've never played before and being confused you didn't beat it the first time.

like honestly, this shit isn't that hard to figure out. i can't help but wonder if maybe you might also have severe autism. did your mom have to dress you before you went out on this date?

>>8619323
>i can't help but wonder if maybe you might also have severe autism. did your mom have to dress you before you went out on this date?

Well, thats a very unnecessary comment to make. I've been out of my parents house and on my own for 7 years. Not all of us are on the same level of experience when it comes to relationships. I'm an introvert and dedicated most of my late teens to 20's to school, not jumping in and out of relationships.

>>8619365
most people find time for both.

just like school, relationships take YEARS to figure out. you don't just go to one class and then have your degree handed to you. and you are a good decade behind in your studying.
a good first lesson will be to try to stop jumping to ridiculous conclusions without sufficient evidence to back them up.

good luck with that.

>>8618869
Are you a fucking female?

>>8619489
i'm a guy.

>>8618869
god fucking dammit give him to me !

>>8620191
Then don't go with this stupid idea that love is found at first sight, it's an structure that has to be built. You only realize you love someone after many many years you look at this person and notice how much you like spending time with him/her. Passion and sexual attraction happen at first sight, but love? Ask yourself this , did you felt comfortable with him? Did you had a good time? Do you think you can on the future talk openly about anything that goes on your mind? Does his his character and morals fit with yours?

Don't pass opportunities like this without thinking really carefully, and maybe talk with him about that.

>>8619021
Where the fuck do you live anon? I'd kill to have a masc bottom

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>>8619021
You sound like 90% of the normal gays I find on 4chan, I mean I would like to say "wow nice you're so unique in your tastes and how you envision your perfect man" but I simply cannot. The type of guy you want is basically "out of stock" in the whole world though.

>>8619072
are all americans this shallow or is it a generational issue?

>>8618869
>for some stupid reason I'm just not interested

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philophobia_(fear)

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>masculine personality
>masculine voice
>can't let people dominate me in any situation
>realize I'm probably incredibly submissive in bed, but will never know because I'm too afraid/proud to try