who /notdelusional/ here? I would give anything to be a girl,

see you in the suicide ward in 10 years

>>7925630
>le bitter resentful hon: the post

>>7925642
at least I won't be a monstrosity with fake tits and a 5 oclock shadow.

>>7925654
me either :)

>>7925630
You're just less dysphoric or have more self-control. Good for you, but hope that doesn't change.

>>7925650
>>7925657
D E L U S I O N A L

>>7925642
I kinda feel like OP.

I used to want to be a girl, but I'm 35, so it wasn't exactly as accepted as it is now.

Now I don't think I ever really wanted to be a girl, I just really like girls, and hate myself so I thought "if I were a girl, my life would be better!"

Of course, that's bullshit, and all you trannies are as delusional as Chris-chan.

I'll probably still end up shooting myself when I'm 50 though.

>>7925654
You are aware of things like hair removal and growing your own boobs right? It's not just makeup to cover 5 o'clock shadows and fake tits.

>>7925926
I'm 6'3 and well over 200 lbs. No amount of hair removal or estrogen would ever make me resemble anything close to a normal female.

>>7925940
I'm 5'8 and 116 lbs and feel the same way

>>7925630
I'm not delusional either, so I stay a dude. I don't mind watching other trannies transition. Some of them are cute. Nothing wrong with being an estrogenized man who presents as a woman.

>>7926536
It's sad learning about ones who don't pass or are unhappy though.

>>7926562
Sadly, this is most of us. It's utter fucking hell, especially knowing that you could've transitioned just a few years earlier and turned out fine. I'm probably going to kill myself desu.

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I'm sincerely sorry you feel like you can't be yourself because other people's opinions are so critical in your self image.

>>7927304
Apology accepted

>>7926602
>I'm probably going to kill myself desu.
Why anon, is there nothing else good in life?

>>7925654
>starting late enough that you actually grew facial hair

Ehhhh yeah you're kinda fucked. But the "fake tits and 5 o'clock shadow meme" is really dumb desu, most twinkhons don't actually look like the stereotypical tranny.

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>>7925630
>>7925654
>>7925740

You're just a crazy hon.

You still are trannies, just ones who missed the boat and is so masculinized he'd be a freak. You'll likely break and go hon later. Sad

It's hilarious cause there's lots of smart people like femboys who both managed to avoid becoming trans and get to stay cute

>>7927396
Twinkhon is unacceptable, get ffs or don't transition. Andrej should have stayed a femboy if he didn't want to do that

>>7927337
It's not an apology it's empathy.

>>7927601
I'm sorry you feel that way.

I think the same as you OP. But I ain't gonna repress. That's why I am on HRT (1st month) but I don't think that I can ever come out. Scared that I will be forced to, since the changes will be obvious. It's a strange conundrum where I wish I had boobs but I don't want to get boobs because it would out me.

probably gonna get a boy cut tomorrow. my long hair started make me look strange again (but I don't want to :((

>>7927396
Considering that bone development and hair growth are largely independent, I'm not sure what you're on about. There are plenty of 13 year olds with more facial and body hair than adults, but are nevertheless much shorter and smaller in general.

>>7927579
>missed the boat
W-when does the boat leave for good?

>>7927579
Bring me down harder this isn't nearly enough

>>7925740
I'm 32 and I can relate. I'm definitely AGP and did want to be a girl at various points, but was too repressed/autistic to do anything about it early. Transition is futile for us. But at least we're fully masculinized men, a lot of trannies in their 20s are already too far gone and will waste years on hormones chasing a dream. The unlucky ones will have gotten FFS,SRS, BA, laser/electro and only years later realize it was futile.

>>7925940
Yep can relate to the whole too big to be a woman thing. The advantage to that is, if your too masc to be a woman, it's better that you have a masc body, than be a petite manlet with a hypermasc skull.

>>7927771
If you have to ask, it's probably already left for you

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>>7925940
same

not sure how long ill last

Is 20 too late?

>>7929548
Anything past puberty is taking a gamble. At 20, it really depends on how much puberty messed you up.

For example, how tall are you? Ribcage, shoulder, and hip measurements? How's your face?

>>7929555
Actually, I would argue that even starting during puberty is a gamble, although you'd be stopping the worst effects (ending puberty at 5'9" instead of 6'4", for example). But yeah, generally, it depends on what your body is like at this point in time. From 17-25, whether or not it's late depends entirely on that. After 25, though, things go downhill fast.

>>7929555
5'7". Shoulders are relatively broad, hips seem average. I'm ugly.

>>7929572
Those are somewhat nebulous terms, but you're pretty twinkish. You'll probably make it unless "relatively broad" means linebacker shoulders, which isn't the impression I got. 5'7" is a fantastic height.

>>7929572
Oh, I forgot to ask. Are you ugly as in masculine? Because as long as you don't have particularly masculine features (strong brow, horseface, giant chin and jaw, high hairline, etc. you should be able to pass as at least an ugly woman. And who knows, sometimes ugly guys turn into pretty girls. Without a pic, it's hard to tell.

>>7929602
but what's life going to be like for a masc - tranny looking woman?

as a cis guy, you can do anything and no one is going to judge you and your looks

>>7925630
I guess you aren't dysphoric then... Which I guess makes you barely trans?

Literally no point in continue living if you can't transition.

>>7929617
You can be dysphoric and still not transition. People have been doing it for hundreds of years!

>>7929602
My forehead is about 2 inches tall, which isn't great, but I've also seen relatively pretty girls with bigger foreheads. My nose isn't wide but it has a hump on it that I don't like. My chin and jaw are average.

I'd provide proper measurements but someone's pilfered my measuring tape.

>>7927771
It doesn't. Look into it yourself, understand the work that will need to be done, and act accordingly.

>>7929548
Ive seen people who started late in life (fucking 40s) and somehow managed to pass. If this is something you want to do then start and don't stop.

>>7929625
I have no idea what average means in this context (average relative to males? Females? Or androgynous), but I think you'll be fine, all things considered. Enjoy being a girl :)

>>7925642

Couldn't this comment apply to anyone posting here with some degree of confidence?

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>>7925630
Isn't it more delusional to live in denial and pretend you're okay rather than accept that you have a disorder and do what you can to lessen it?

What's more pathetic, a feminized male or a dude that has to lie to himself every day?

>>7929803
>What's more pathetic, a feminized male or a dude that has to lie to himself every day?

The only one who is lying to themselves every day are men that think they can become women by injecting themselves with hormones and/or mutilating themselves

>>7929803
>implying you can't be honest with yourself and still not transition
>implying you can't lessen the dysphoria without transition

>>7929816
In the long term, not really. You can slow it down but you crack eventually anon.
Enjoy being an old man in a dress.

>>7929816
You'd be among the few who've done it, if not the only one. Many have tried, and they've all failed.

>>7929833
Proof?

>>7925630
same

sad thing is i have a lot of potential and pass about 50 percent of the time with no effort. maybe thats why im able to put off transition

>>7925630
>tfw not delusional and it makes me suicidal

why was i cursed like this

i can't live with being a man but I'll never be able to not be one or even look like I'm not one

>>7925630
>I would give anything to be a girl
you wouldn't or you would have already transitioned

>>7929872

a man with a gaping wound and artificially pumped with estrogen is not a girl

All gender is a performance and there have been transgender people in history for thousands of years.

>>7929886
sure hon

>>7925654
Looking like an odd girlboy does not a monstrocity make. If I were still in a testosterone fueled shell at this point I might actually have ended it. Instead, I see hope and light at the end of the tunnel and have come to love the struggle of life.

>>7929907
only trannies can be hons, not cis males

>>7929961
>only trannies can be hons, not repressors
FTFY

>>7929623
Either they suicided, or they were kept so busy with basic survival that they could keep on going.

>>7935836
Nowadays they could keep busy with whatever they are passionate about.

>>7935844
That's not how it works.

>>7935911
Do tell.

>>7925630
I was born with a vagina and was poked and prodded at and ridiculed by every person who touched me until I was assigned male and the vagina was removed. I remember my mom specifically calling me a monster.

I ended up being a fully functioning male aside from that secondary characteristic, even with a pretty good sized dick and set of balls.

I can never be what I am originally, and no one will ever see me as that or be able to love what I actually am inside because they will never be able to see it.

I'm not really impressed with what you think problems are.

>>7935927
What are you inside?

>>7935912
Enjoyment won't block out despair.

>>7935937
Fat Vriska.

>>7935944
No, real answer though, probably both male and female simultaneously. This is probably why none of the feelings of others really seem foreign to me whether they're trans or cis or gay.

It's also why my feelings are foreign to most others, since I'm straddling the line or something, or falling into some weird sub-group that nobody is aware of.

>>7938764
What are your foreign/unknown subgroup feelings?

>>7925630
I think you are the pathetic here.

>>7938815
honestly it might all be more of a result of childhood abuse than my physiology
>I don't believe in safety
>I don't believe there are real outsiders, or real groups, only attitudes and defense mechanisms
>I'm not physically grossed out or confused by or fascinated by anyone's body or appearance or gender or preference
>i.e. everyone just seems pretty normal to me
>I'm incapable of schadenfreude
>I'm in a man's body, but I want to make it cute sometimes, but I don't think that will make me feminine. The male part of me wants to be cute, the female part of me wants to be cool.
>sometimes I feel like I'm a woman rocking a man's bod
>sometimes I feel like a man with missing pieces
>I have no compunctions or fears against murder or death, I am already half dead
>I often find myself asking "is this how you feel" in a way that makes a person realize things they weren't aware of, but nobody asks me these questions
>everyone is both the same as me and different from me
>I can't truly be friends with anyone because everyone else is too averse to pain and discomfort and change to handle honesty, and too afraid of rejection and isolation to express or indulge in their real feelings and interests unless you've already had sex or something
>I am already in pain and isolated and rejected and demisexual so
>life is pretty great

I really want to watch some netflix and chill, but everyone wants to have sex or something, but sex has never been a thrill for me because I understood the motivations and feelings and inner thoughts of both sexes immediately, and I'm constantly just looking for someone whose strength will impress me

and I'm pretty sure they don't exist

I usually just tell people I can only be attracted to espers

>>7925630
>not delusional
>trying to be as pragmatic as possible about being trans
>already going to sleep with a gun to my head on a regular basis without HRT
>antidepressants only work for so long before they turn you into an emotional zombie
>thus far the only treatment that's shown any success rate is transition
>my options are to continue to repress and eventually kill myself, or start HRT, try to transition and have a shot at not killing myself

>>7938839
D E L U S I O N A L

>>7938966
>Marry, fuck, kill

>>7939028
Kill, kill, kill

>>7939046
That's my favorite anime!

>>7938917
>I don't believe in safety
Why not?

>I'm incapable of schadenfreude
>I have no compunctions or fears against murder or death, I am already half dead
Why don't you?

>I often find myself asking "is this how you feel" in a way that makes a person realize things they weren't aware of, but nobody asks me these questions
Can you give examples of this?

>I can't truly be friends with anyone because everyone else is too averse to pain and discomfort and change to handle honesty,
Examples of people doing this?

>I really want to watch some netflix and chill, but everyone wants to have sex or something, but sex has never been a thrill for me
/acegen/?

>because I understood the motivations and feelings and inner thoughts of both sexes immediately,
What are your insights here?

>>7925630
>I would give anything to be a girl, but I know I can never have that, so I choose to live as a man.

Why? Because your body is already so masculine that passing as a female would require thousands of dollars of medical procedures and you'd still be an ugly hon?

Or are you perfectly passable and simply falling for the "oh shit i have xy chromosomes, guess i can't wear a dress" meme?

>>7939816
>>I'm incapable of schadenfreude
>>I have no compunctions or fears against murder or death, I am already half dead
>Why don't you?
because death is not a bad thing, nor is it the end of existence. soul data is transmitted and memorized by the universal matter. the essential personality material is conveyed and reintegrated. Life doesn't have a lesser value because it ends sooner, nor is it wasted if someone dies "prematurely" from murder or suicide or whatever. a life of suffering is not less than one of joy.
>>I don't believe in safety
>Why not?
because it's not real. it's just a wish, not a reality. believing in it won't improve our circumstances. there is no point at which we should relinquish our vigilance. on the contrary, as long as we order our priorities correctly and place love and life at the top of our lists, there is no reason to ever stop being vigilant. Caring is caring.
>>I often find myself asking "is this how you feel" in a way that makes a person realize things they weren't aware of, but nobody asks me these questions
>Can you give examples of this?
not without violating somebody else's privacy.
>>I really want to watch some netflix and chill, but everyone wants to have sex or something, but sex has never been a thrill for me
>/acegen/?
if I were really ace that'd be great, but I'm actually demisexual. at some point I will make things uncomfortable for them by being a pervert who experiences too much arousal and libido without attraction and I don't want to make them feel that way by talking about gross sex stuff and the way I live and think normally. on the other hand, if I filter myself, that makes me uncomfortable, and I won't do it.
>>because I understood the motivations and feelings and inner thoughts of both sexes immediately,
>What are your insights here?
the question is too vague to answer efficiently

>>7939868
Use your powers of deduction. Which do you think she means?

>>7939876
>>>because I understood the motivations and feelings and inner thoughts of both sexes immediately,
>>What are your insights here?
>the question is too vague to answer efficiently
What motivations/feelings/inner thoughts do you understand from males and females?

>>7925630
hi biology is hard and I never learned there's no actual difference between the first and second X guess I better give up

>>7939897
>What motivations/feelings/inner thoughts do you understand from males and females?
motivations for what actions? feelings about what subject? inner thoughts during what activity? behind what expression?

>>7925630
>you don't have to go full tranny
there's something in between like traps, cd's, drag

>>7939868
The first one, obviously
>>7939880
Don't misgender me you shitlord

>>7939954
just pick examples.

>>7938966
It's funny because this image shows the three types of MtF trannies

>twinkhon on the left
>passable (at least from this angle) in the middle
>hon on the right

>>7944279
The twinkhon is the cutest. The """passable""" one is ugly.

>>7944253
Your gender is female though. You're a she even if you won't admit it.

>>7944308
That's some delusional tranny logic. I'm a man with XY chromosomes and a dick.

nah, it just makes you weak
if you weren't too scared to actually be who you are you wouldn't be posting on /lgbt/

>>7944365
Actually, I have the sense to realize that who I actually am is a rather large, masculine man. I'd have to be completely out of touch with reality to think I'm "actually" a woman.

>>7944285
Passing doesn't mean pretty, though. Many cis girls are ugly, after all. It's just that I'd be less likely to clock her as trans.

>>7944319
>>7939902
hurdurrr

>>7944267
idk man why would I remember that kind of thing, you need to hit upon some kind of hard link for me to bring it back

I'm too busy remembering shit about the designs I want to make and exams I need to pass

off hand I guess I did apparently know one of my friends was trans before he did

or did he become trans because of my influence? it's schrodinger's trap or something

>>7925630
trying to quit hrt

help

>>7925642
>see you
Exactly.