I feel insecure about being into masculine men.

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>>7735802
I don't really know what to tell you my dude. Just think it over, gain some perspective on things, get over it! There will always be people who want to put you down for being a faggot. Who cares what they think? Those who mind don't matter. Those who matter don't mind. You already know all this of course but your comrades in faggotry are always here to remind you.

>>7735855

What about my parents? I dont know how they'd feel seeing a huge guy next to their already smaller son..

>>7735802
Do you have a boyfriend anon? I'd be down to be your big shield against the world anon

>>7735871

where you located

>>7735802
honestly, given that you got the version of the gay gaze that's exactly identical to the female gaze, you lucked way out

>>7735802
post pics op

orinigal

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>>7735981

insecure af, so here's a pic for ants

>>7735869
For one thing, who fucking cares how they feel? You really look at guys thinking 'hmm, would my mom like him?' If you do, STOP IT. You're a big boy now.

But also they will probably just feel happy for you anyway. It's 2017 in the west. Relax.

>>7736153

yeah, i know. i'm in college and they're always asking me if im in a relationship yet, but idk how i'd feel with them seeing me with a guy.

so many weird connotations

>>7735942
The UK, willing to travel

>>7736130
Your figure is slim, but you have some defined muscles, which makes you a bit more masculine. Not that normies would think of that.

I'm kind of the same situation. I have a fuckbuddy/half bf, but I want more. Yet I don't want my parents to see him, since he's a chubby bear-type, and in he's 34. I'm just 19. One of my friends has said I should find a guy my age instead.

I don't think you can help other people. It's normal sociology. You can however look proud to be with bf in public and with your parents.

>>7736174

was just there twice the past year, lol

>>7735802
You're steeped in sexist ideology

femininity is not inferior, that's just misogynist thinking

I unironically recommend you read feminist literature

>>7736130
how big is your cock?

>>7736304

almost 6 inches i think

>>7736295

how is anything here sexist? its about dudes

>>7736325
If it's not centered around women it's sexist obviously

>>7736325
It's about insecurity with being an effeminate dude, especially one dating a masculine dude. This has to do with the idea that femininity is shameful for a man, an idea which goes back to the ancient world and is clearly rooted in sexism.

>>7736316
post a pic of cock and boihole

>>7736352

idkkkk

>>7736357
Please. I want to beat off to your pictures. Wouldn't that turn you on knowing someone is cumming at the thought of stretching your tight little hole?

>>7736369

maybe..

>>7736346

so just because i feel shame about it im sexist?

>>7736325
>>7736325
Sexist doesn't mean "against women" it just means accepting/supporting the ideology surrounding the dichotomy of sex/gender and how they are constructed and justified using nature.

OP feels insecure about his condition because of a worldview under which he can't conceptualize himself as a successful type based on his essence. He considers the sex/gender types to be incommensurable so if he behaves feminine or like a woman then he is not performing his own supposed role correctly.
I think that he can get rid of his negative/shameful feelings by studying the deconstruction of sex/gender and their implications to wither his previous indoctrination away.

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>>7736352
>>7736369
For fucks sakes. This is a blue board. Go take a cold shower.

>>7736381
No but you feel shame about it and anxiety about how others would perceive you with a manly man because of society's prevalent sexism.

>>7736346
>This has to do with the idea that femininity is shameful for a man, an idea which goes back to the ancient world and is clearly rooted in sexism.

You are absolutely retarded. Most women would be offended if you told them they are masculine. Is that sexist against men?

>>7736412
No it's not "sexist against men" and neither is OP's shame "sexist against women"but both do reflect sexist attitudes shaping people's anxieties about their masculinity or femininity. You have an idea of sexism in your head that it is always brought up in the context of accusing someone of being a sexist bigot chauvinist pig. That is not the context here.

>>7736130
>>7736230
>>7736304


am i cute tho?? just wondering

>>7736396

i think this is more related to me being submissive than feeling like a woman

>>7736459
post a face pic, and i'll tell ya!

>>7736459
I'll admit you've got a nice body, but fishing for compliments on 4chan is super pathetic so I find you unattractive.

>>7736468

i'm living in a pretty secluded area for the next few months, so not really anyone else lol

>>7736459
I'm not into twinks. But some are

Look anon,I know how you feel,but I feel comfortable knowing this: the psychology indicates that every human is 50%manly and 50%girly,so, anon don't worry!

>>7736498

so what am i?

>>7736396
>because of society's prevalent sexism.
No, being submissive is inherently shameful. Women aren't shamed for it though because they are encouraged to live like children, which is why you interpret it as sexist to say there's anything wrong with it.

>>7736512
You are just a person anon.
You choose if you want to be top/submissive.
You choose the way you want to live.
What if your parents don't like it? Fuck them! It's your life isn't?

Also... May I see your face?

>>7736545

idk. would be kinda scared someone i've met browses this site

>>7736557

K.

I hope I helped anon.

>>7736521
Being submissive isn't not bad in every context, it's really not a big deal if someone wants to do it sexually and calling it "shameful" is merely sexist moralism used to enforce hierarchical domination.

It can be referred to as sexist because it is a result of sexist indoctrination, for formation of the gender/sex schema that is culturally imposed upon people growing up in our society. Abiding by these imposed rules and accepting them as the requirements is what is being called sexist in this context. It's not really to do with men or women specifically

>>7736627
No, what's sexist is encouraging women into the inferior role.

>>7736639
Explain to me how submissiveness is inferior without appealing to emotion.

>>7736656

because you're on the bottom, as a male who is supposed to be the penetrator, getting penetrated

>>7736656
It is the giving up of responsibility for yourself.

>>7736666
>"supposed to be"
kek

you realize this is basically like replying "BECAUSE I SAY SO"

>>7736667
Wrong. Submissives are not slaves.

>>7736685

aren't men biologically supposed to be the penetrator?

>>7736685
Not total responsibility, as slavery, but some. Less bad but still bad.

>>7736639
Well that is definitely sexist, but it's mostly a problem because of the enforcement. My point of contention is that "femininity" or even submissiveness by itself is not an issue, it is the diverting of intentions towards it that is unjust, especially when it is justified by fallacious appeals to nature (girls are just happier being dominated, etc).
The thing is, being submissive in some circumstances is not really "inferior", merely different. You need to consider the actual material consequences of doing it, and also the potential mental effects and whether there is coercion or violence involved. If it's literally just a sexual preference to be penetrated in the bedroom, there's nothing particularly negative there that would warrant calling it "inferior". It is just a preference, it's like saying that wanting to eat a particular flavour is inferior. The point at which it becomes "inferior" is when sexism against women is considered from a holistic perspective and understood as a means of reducing their agency and power.
That is not really what's happening when OP says he wants to be sexually submissive with a partner.

>>7736666
You can't say "supposed to" because that is effectively inferring an ought from an is. Just because it can be used that way doesn't mean it is "inferior" to not use it as such.

>>7736667
I could see this applying as a criticism more generally when you are just being controlled without having your own responsibility, it's definitely not a positive thing. However I think it's reasonable to engage in occasionally, you don't always have to have all the pressure put on you, keep your energy for when it matters.

>>7736690
If men aren't supposed to take cock then why did God put the prostate there? checkmate theists

>>7736690
is this an appeal to the natural world? because animals have gay buttsex too

>>7736711
You really think a dom/sub relationship is a one way street? Yes the dominant takes responsibility for the submissive and often makes the final decisions in matter, but the submissive also takes responsibility for the dominant. A good submissive has to understand this and be there for the dominant, not just a dead weight for the dominant to drag around.

>>7735802
Just kill yourself desu senpai

>>7736713
Submissive male inferiority as a byproduct of sexism against women is a bit of a stretch. Pull out that Occam's razor and simplify both submissive men and women being perceived as inferior due to having less immediate power. Power, in this context, being aggression, ambition, physical strength, and other awesome shit coming from testosterone.

>>7736713
>why did god

God's not real. Kill yourself.

>>7736713
>Well that is definitely sexist, but it's mostly a problem because of the enforcement.
It doesn't have to be enforced to be taught to people when it shouldn't be.

>and whether there is coercion or violence involved.
Those are separate problems.

>If it's literally just a sexual preference to be penetrated in the bedroom,
That's not submissiveness.

>The point at which it becomes "inferior" is when sexism against women is considered from a holistic perspective and understood as a means of reducing their agency and power.
It's inferior regardless of women. This isn't a feminist talking point.

>However I think it's reasonable to engage in occasionally, you don't always have to have all the pressure put on you, keep your energy for when it matters.
Maybe.

>>7736734
In as much as the dominant is giving up responsibility that's bad too.

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>>7736781
>when you think Tumblr is real life

>>7736781
>In as much as the dominant is giving up responsibility that's bad too.
Why do you see it as people giving up their responsibility for themselves? They are only taking on new additional responsibility, for each other.

>>7736813
Outsourcing personal responsibility is irresponsible.

>>7736820
>wanting to get manhandled in bed is abdicating responsibility

>>7736820
You continue to twist this into something it's not.

>>7736828
>>7736826
>>7736820

You're all fags just kill yourselves.

>>7736826
Yes. It's feeling like you aren't capable and substituting that with wanting to be an accessory for someone else.I feel that way and I hate myself for it.

>>7736839
>"I believe my sexuality has to do with my inadequacy complex"
>"therefore you have an inadequacy complex too if you like what I like in bed"
Genius.

>I feel that way and I hate myself for it.
I am beginning to hate you too. Time to stop posting.

>>7736839
I've never felt incapable for wanting my partner take the reigns in the bedroom.

>>7736901
Maybe it's because you're a bigger fag than he is?

>>7735802
I kinda felt like you for a bit but I gave up on it. I am okay with how short I am, I am okay with being a submissive person, and I'm okay with my parents inferring things about my personal life.

The reason being? People, my friends, and my parents will infer things no matter what, maybe they infer that I bend over and take it up the ass. Maybe one day my boyfriend slips up and my parents think he's into being tied up. You can't control what people think. Would you be happy or healthy changing who you are? If not then why worry, "Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." If someone really cares about you and wants to be a part of you life they would want you to be honest with them and happy.

>>7736994

good advice, been thinking and feeling better

>>7735802
you should, masculine men are disgusting

>>7735802
>Like i'd be his whore or something along those lines.
you know I always thought about this, I am 6 ft 4 and lift/masc, bi too, fucked several femboys
i met ones sister before while with them which was pretty weird, and it's just obvious I am the dominanting partner
i always wonder how they feel about it when I am seen with them
usually go out for something to eat afterwards or w/e, sometimes people look, i dont care
there is some visceral part of me that feels a little proud when im with them in public though, like i own them

>>7739129
>there is some visceral part of me that feels a little proud when im with them in public though, like i own them
hot. i want to feel the reverse of that, like i'm owned. is that how girls feel all the time?

>>7739252
can offer a straight person perspective:
me and bf are similar in height and weight but its still painfully obvious who is the dominant one
hint not me

i learned not to mind although i am very aware of it.
maybe it doesnt matter to others? objectively, what we do and how we distribute roles within or relationship is only our concern.

>>7739309
>hint not me
kek. how is it obvious who's dominant?

>i learned not to mind although i am very aware of it.
why did it bother you originally?

Oh fuck that sounds so exhausting. Thank god I'm a tall man and a strict top because I've never thought about shit like this. Well not this deeply but people have given some good feed back here.

I just think your going to have to get over it considering people are always always wondering who is topping and bottoming in gay man relations.

Knowing what position you are lets straight people see you in a way they can understand. What I don't think a lot of people can take is if your at a certain height and weight people already assume you play the position of the sub to bigger men.

In short -- your parents have already long since accepted this. But I guess the contrast/visual is something they have yet to see.

I don't think you're less of a man because you like masc dudes or being submissive, but you have to wonder if you like those things because you are less of a man.

I think you need to take a step back from sex and focus on just becoming more secure in yourself.

>>7739336
>how is it obvious who's dominant?

because i'm an effeminate manlet with a bubble butt and pouty pink lips

>>7739309
So your a female in a heterosexual relationship and self conscious about being seen as the submissive one ?

>>7739371
im a girl, dude, not a guy

>>7739336
it's just in the way he acts. im shy he's out going and talky and loud and such a... guy, like you can tell he's masculine and kinda aggressive-ish in his approach, while im just... the one getting fucked. you can't escape it, its in the body language. i can always tell who tops and who bottoms both in straight and gay couples

i dont like the idea of others visualising me as weak or submissive. i dont like the idea of being the shy girl that gets thrown around. and i could tell it from the looks of his friends thatve known him for a while:
,you poor girl, bet you cant handle it', and there have been jokes along those lines for the time we have been together, and i always fuck up. instead of saying something sassy, i get super embarrassed and confirm it by being awkward.
wish you could witness it, im bad at describing it. i guess because it stris me up a bit.

>>7739376
well, yes, i just wish i wasn't awkward and had had the social ability to level the terrain.
i just wanted to show op that others have it too, and aside from affecting the one that feels that way, i genuinely don't think other people think about it as much as we do.

>>7739444
Ohhh your an actual girl. Oh fuck I was getting all sucked into this thinking I was giving internet advice to some small pussy boy.

>>7739467
i am a mere visitoress from /pol, not a small pussy boy
sorry anon

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>>7739444
>im a straight girl, dude

why are you here?
shouldn't you be changing a diaper or sucking a dick or something?
why does your owner let you on the internet?

>>7739444
Do you actually like being submissive in the relationship, forgetting other people?

For me I think other people seeing me that way would be nice, because I like it within the relationship.

>>7739467
She isn't OP...

>>7739498
i enjoy it quite a bit!
but to me, theres something sweet about that being our thing, not open for everyone else to see.
idk,maybe i get over this, just shared my current feelings, is all

>>7739486
ouch, for what purpose?

>>7739252
girls probably like feeling protected yeah, and i like making girls feel protected in public too
but with twinks/femboys its more of an "evil" feeling, like this is my bitch and he just swallowed my cum like 10 mins ago, and the waitress taking his order knows that, will go back and tell people in the kitchen and stuff
and i like the fact its a little humiliating for him probably....its hard to articulate but i just feel a little sadistic glee when im in public with an overtly effeminate looking/acting male
i also like opening doors and stuff for them, insisting on paying for the meal fully etc. and i think thats motivated by something a bit dark as opposed to compassion/politeness...but i dont fully understand it

>>7739777
i'd like both. feeling protected and feeling humiliated.

>>7739777

thats the exact feeling of why im insecure, being lessened as a man just 'belonging' to someone

>>7739777
HOT
sub here