FTM General

i'm trying to become a healthier person, but it's hard to figure how best to do that
i wish there was an easy trustworthy roadmap

>>5419066
Ayy are you me? I've been trying to get my shit together for my health too. I have no fucking clue where to start.

>>5419066
>>5419088

The absolute first step is stop drinking anything that's not water. No beer, juice, soda etc. Milk is still fine though. This is the easiest thing you can do.

>>5419128
Not drinking is a given and already something I need to stop doing because my health is absolute garbage thanks to doing it for so long. Other than that all I drink is water for the most part.

But where do you go from here? My diet isn't the easiest thing to control due to living with my parents for the time being and I have no car right now. I'll be moving out within the next few months though, hopefully.

>>5419141
Don't worry so much about your diet. You can eat like shit as long as you're moving around enough.

If your goal is simply to get healthy, then make the extra effort to take the stairs, or walk to school/work/errands if you are able.

If your goal is to get fit/swole, then your diet comes into play and you need to do a complete 180 including dedicated workouts.

>>5419066

exercise, eat better... it's not hard...

>>5419128

milk isn't really all that great for people... just saying...

>>5419280
Nothing's /really/ good for you.

>>5419349
lol wat

>>5419128
i mean i drink juice & alcohol sometimes but i don't think that's a big deal.

i'm trying to start using my exercise bike for cardio, and research effective exercise in other forms later. my friend just gave me his old diy soylent so i'll have decent nutrition till i can afford ingredients for my own recipe.

the most pressing and confusing one for me is my mental health. i don't know what coping skills are actually worth learning, etc.

>>5419349

that's not true... but most people are somewhat intolerant to milk + it's fattening as fuck... whereas if youhave a juicer and you're making juice that's gonna be better for you

>>5419457
skim milk isn't very fattening, isn't that what most people drink? plus being fattening isn't the worst thing health wise

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Holy fucking shit, lads! It's that denial-anon again and I just remembered a snippet of dream I had last night.
>apparently had come out as trans to my mum
>was in my room doing something
>these two kids run up and look round my door to stare at me
>"your mum said you were a boy now but..."
>part of me is fucking pissed my mum is clumsily outing me to random people
>"well it's not like i take a pill or something and suddenly i'm male"
>suddenly take notice of myself
>not anxious at all
>casually sitting on the edge of my bed with male posture
>my voice sounded lower and calm too
>felt in my chest the same rush of excitement that i felt when i put my first binder on
>felt more connected and aware of my body than i ever had in a dream before
That's the only part of it I remember, it didn't even wake me up as dreams normally do. But, jesus, that fucking floored me just then to remember it. Has... has anyone else had their dreams tell them stuff?

wait, so you guys WANT personal responsibility and accountability?

it's like the complete opposite of MtF's

good luck

try not to norah vincent your way into therapy when everyone ignores you

>>5419800
>it's like the complete opposite of MtF's
That's kinda the whole idea, yeah.

>>5419740

skim milk has added sugars and whatnot, also if you're eliminating all drinks except water it's cuz you care about liquid calories in which case milk being fattening becomes an issue...

>>5419844
kek

>>5419800
>implying we actually want to be a tranny

>>5420049
yeah that was insensitive of me.

no chick actually would choose to have the responsibilities of a male if she could help it

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>>5420100

Our OP pic is stupid. Might as well have just used a Pepe or trollface.

>>5420318
It's a very old picture made by someone who used to come here.

>>5419755
I remember about two years ago when I was vaguely in denial/questioning that I had a dream in which I was wearing a blue shirt I own but the chest part was completely flat and masculine. Looking and moving my dream hands to feel it made me feel so happy, just like a surge of joy.

This probably wasn't very helpful because I'm still questioning/in denial.

>>5420423
>>5419755
Man you two remind me of myself a couple years ago. Coming to terms with being a tranny has helped me in so many ways. I can't recommend you go see a therapist enough. Mine has been a fucking life saver.

Yesterday, my FtM boyfriend told me that, since he's closeted and always wears female clothes, feels as if he was crossdressing 24/7, and that when he looks in the mirror seeing those clothes and his long hair make him feel like that as well, which of course makes him uncomfortable. I'm trying to understand this but it's making me confused, does this make sense?

26 gay guy (possibly pan or bi) here.

recently been looking at MTF. i love the idea of
fucking a dude with a pussy. also, MTF have
such cute/handsome faces.

>>5421107
meant FTM
SORRY :|

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>>5421107
Fetishizing their genitalia straight out of the gate probably isn't the best way to get an FTM into your bed. Most of us are pretty cool with people being interested in our specific body type, but for most of us our bodies aren't a turn on, either. A good portion of FTMs won't even do PIV. If you want to objectify us or our genitalia, or hook up with us just to check fucking an FTM off your list, sure. Everyone's using someone for something. Just have the social grace to not make it super obvious, and respect the fact some people aren't comfortable with it.

>>5420372
god so many ages ago. makes me sad to wonder how many of us are left from when these generals first started. cheese and crackers, poptarts, and alcoholism. i still have some of the old ops I think.

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I think this was from when we had that one specific, really persistent troll. still one of my favorite quotes though

>>5421221
So don't make it super obvious, but still use you
for my personal gratification? That doesn't make
much sense.

>>5421261
And to clarify, you can not speak for "MOST" or
a "GOOD PORTION" of FTMs. You can,
however, speak of "SOME" or "ONE'S THAT YOU'VE TALKED TO OR KNOW".

Is the google hangout ever gonna happen?

>you will never have a bf as cute as Asian anon from the last thread

>>5421024

it does yeah... he feels like he's in a chick costume cuz he's trans...


>>5421349

my s/o is exactly my type though...

>>5421274
i hope so, i like having group chats to participate in & i've quit skype. it's not hard to make one, but i don't want that level of responsibility

>>5420423
I'm pretty sure that joy was the same rush I got with my binder and the high I was on in my dream. It was quite intoxicating, I miss it. Bro, we can drag ourselves out of denial together.

>>5420710
I think I'm going to tell my therapist when I next see her. She seems to suspect I'm hiding something and I might go out of my mind on my own.Though she's CBT so she won't know how to deal with this, she should be able to find someone who does.

>>5421592
https://discord.gg/0iQY3akjogc5LCEl
I don't get how Google Hangouts work so let's see if I can figure out how Discord works.

i want to go shop for some stuff but i'm feeling nauseous & actually threw up this morning (i feel nausea without vomiting pretty often normally, though).

i'm drinking some ginger tea to try to settle my stomach, but if that doesn't work, going out is a bad idea, right?

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>talking with friend
>still haven't come out to him, still super closeted so I don't think it makes sense just yet
>he makes some retarded joke, can't remember it now
>Tell him I don't get it
>"Of course, anon, because you're not a man"
I mean, I know he still doesn't know, but ouch

>>5421851
you missed a great opportunity, you could have roasted him for telling a shit joke and not being funny

If I made an /ftmgen/ steam group would anybody join?

>>5421024
I felt like that when I wore female clothes and had long hair. He's trans, he feels like a man and his appearance doesn't match that. I didn't even recognize myself when I'd look in the mirror before.

>>5421851
Man I've even had people I'm out to say bullshit like that. Cis people really don't grasp just how badly that shit jabs at trans people.

I have not felt this low in a long time, ftmg.
I think my relationship is slowly dying. I don't want it to be this way, but it's petering out into petty fights and bouts of prolonged silence. part of me would be glad to be free of it if only it meant I could off myself without dragging my other half into it. Whatever happens its going to hurt. I really love them too.

I would say sorry if this depresses anyone, I needed to put it somewhere. I could never admit this out loud.

>>5421941
History has shown 2 of us will join, never talk or interact, then leave the group...

>>5422122
oh, that's awful. do you have friends or family you can turn to for support? if the relationship is doomed, turning to others can be really helpful, and if not, sometimes talking about it with a third party can help you realize new things and make things healthier.

are you usually suicidal, or is your suicidality tied into the relationship? if you have a decent therapist they might be able to give you useful input too

>>5421633
what's discord? is it a brand new chat thing or just some sort of way of using hangouts? i don't really want to start using yet another chat program unless it's got really good security, etc.

After I get my letter, how do I actually go about getting on mones?

Do I just call up endos and explain I'm a trans man then ask for a prescription or what?

>>5422420
Yup. Or get a referral to an endo from your PCP

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>>5422420
P much. I hunted through the GLMA listings (Gay/Lesbian Medical Association, I think anyways) to find someone who actually listed that they did hormone therapy and were also on my insurance's list of official providers. He's a good guy, it was surprisingly easy for me to get that particular ball rolling.
Hilariously it ended up being a moot point because literally the only thing my insurance covered was the syringes to inject with. At least I still got pharmacy discount, I guess.
>tfw American medical system
Well, it's a list that might help you find someone who's probably not a dickbag to trans people anyways, good luck to you dude.

>>5421633
i think it's a browser based chat. or has that option? the only one i'm familiar with is skype, and i don't really use it.

>>5422650
google hangouts can either be in browser on the same page as your gmail inbox, or a smartphone app
dunno about discord

>>5421593
The first time I put on my binder I stayed up all night taking pictures, then the high wore off and I felt super uncomfortable, like I didn't fit the image I thought myself to be.

Thinking back, I used to be happy whenever I found straight lines in my silhouette (I'm chubby/'curvy' in the wrong ways) and any time I appeared masculine, it was like christmas. Now it's actually approaching christmas and I no longer get that feeling?

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why do I feel horny when I have 2 pee

Kinda curious to know, is /lgbt/ your home board? If not which do you usually hang out on?

Mine's /mu/

>>5422852
I usually hang out on /x/, /b/ and /r9k/

>>5422852
/ftmgen/ & /mu/ but mostly sharethreads

Can I ask you guys a question about your life experiences? I'll go away if this isn't okay.

My girlfriend just told me that she's (or he's) trans and wants to start transitioning. He already dresses in a masculine way, but he bought a binder and wants to make an appointment with a gender therapist. I asked him like what makes him feel this way and his answer really really bothered me.
I want to know, what was your guys' clues that you were trans? What made you think besides dysphoria that you are a male? Thank you

>>5423113
>his answer really really bothered me
What was his answer?

>>5423132
He didn't say he hated his body and that he felt comfortable as a female, but just that he should transition because he prefers looking like a guy anyway. and that he probably is one because he's not into girly clothes, makeup, having female friends, gossiping or whatever. and when he was growing up he wasn't into that either and his mom made him wear dresses sometimes and he hated it, and he hated dolls and liked video games and pokemon. He also said he hates having to correct people who call him Sir and he hates getting harassed for being a lesbian so he said that transitioning would basically fix those problems.
None of that seems like a good reason to put chemicals like that in your body. You don't have to be feminine to be a girl. Lots of little girls like video games and pokemon, those are meant to be unisex interests, they just happen to be marketed towards little boys just like makeup happens to be marketed towards women and not men. It just bothers me because I'm a girl, and I wear makeup but I don't dress all that girly and I like video games and I don't have a lot of female friends and I work in STEM like he does. But I never felt that any of that makes me a man. I don't really appreciate the harassment I get for being gay either but I don't think transition is the right way to solve that problem.
I didn't say any of this to him and I've been using male pronouns for him since then but it just bothers me. I feel like if he transitions I'm gonna have to break up with him because I am a lesbian and I can't say that I'm a lesbian and I have a boyfriend because wouldn't that be misgendering to him?? But I don't want to leave him in the middle of these issues. I'm really at a loss here but I felt like this is a better place to ask than adv.

>>5423189
Wew, yeah I'm not really sure what to say about that one. I mean dysphoria is a pretty huge thing for being trans and any therapist worth their salt probably wouldn't give him a letter of recommendation unless he checks out all the boxes for GID. Maybe it's different where I live in Canada, but my therapist made absolute sure I passed all the needed requirements.

I can't really tell you if he is or isn't in fact trans because I simply don't know him. I just hope that if he does see a therapist they're legit and can help him through his issues, whether or not he finds out he's trans or not.

>>5423189
sounds nb

>>5423208
I asked a mutual friend of ours about it who is a trans woman and she gave pretty much the same answer, she was just into typical feminine things as a child and doesn't really have strong dysphoria and she's got hormones so I don't know. I just know that my gf is going to the same guy for therapy and our friend is all excited about it.

>>5423211
nb? like no big deal, I shouldn't worry about this? Should I break up with him?

>>5423221
nb like nonbinary

>>5423221
Sounds like a shit tier therapist or your friend lied to get what she wanted then. Either way, if he ends up not being trans, not many cis people will feel comfortable being on hormones for long.

>>5423189
"He" is going to take HRT for 6 months to a year, have a mental breakdown, and detransition. So you can either bail now or just wait for that shit to blow over.

Search ftm detransition on youtube. Happens all the time.

>>5423189
>>5423113
Your partner's reasoning sounds VERY suspect to me and I think you should have another talk with him about it soon, and raise all of these concerns with him. Which really you should have done at the time when you had that conversation with him.
>>5423211
>>5423226
Can we please stop propagating this non-binary rubbish? It's not real, it is literally just not being stereotypically feminine/masculine if you are a woman/man.

>>5423281
>Can we please stop propagating this non-binary rubbish? It's not real
keep dreaming shithead

>>5423189
>"i'm a lesbian but people keep calling me a lesbian!"
>"i'll just transition"
Oh fuck that. That is the dumbest reason to transition ever. She isn't trans and she's going to regret the shit out of it, hopefully sooner than later when she finds out she can't pick and chose what T does to her. I would suggest talking to her about your concerns but anon don't feel bad if you have to kick her ass to the curb because this sounds crazy.

Half of us just look/sound like faggots anyway so I hope she likes being called a faggot instead.

>>5423297
It's not real and it's stupid. Just because a girl rather play with GI Joe figures instead of Barbie doesn't mean it needs a super special name just so you can feel unique enough to be worth something.

>>5422852
I usually hang out at /vp/, /vg/, /int/ and only occassionally /b/

>>5423189
They definitely have the wrong idea, and think that turning into a guy will solve their problems. Ask them if they really really want to spend the rest of their lives like this, make them realize that they are going to age as a man with all that implies. They may get angry at you for telling them this, but it's for their wellbeing. Hopefully their therapist won't give them 'mones

>>5423404
lmao yes nonbinary identities totally did not exist in pre colonial societies. next you're going to say it's something only white millenial insert buzzword of the weeks can afford or something else you've pulled out of your gaping asshole

>>5423426
>implying it wasn't white millennials on tumblr who came up with terms like "non-binary" and "genderqueer" to make themselves feel special about liking the colour green or wearing pants
you should go back to your hugbox desu

>>5423426
Demiboys plz leave

>>5422852
my home board was /co/ for a long time but recently the only 4chan threads i've been visiting are a couple generals here & the angrier non-general /lgbt/ threads when i forget how bad a time it'll be

i'd like to occasionally visit /co/ & /x/ again though, i think

>>5423404
i'm nonbinary and i have physical dysphoria towards the facial hair i started growing that was just as strong as what i felt towards my breasts. it's not just about gender roles, and if you think it is you're not thinking hard enough.

>>5423461
the word genderqueer has existed since the 70s, dude, and i'm not sure about nonbinary but it was at least around in the early 2000s before tumblr existed. there's a plethora of non-white & older nonbinary people, and most of them have physical and/or social dysphoria. while there is a slightly larger issue with confusing gender roles for gender identity than among binary trans people, this confusion is not nearly as much more prevalent as anti-nb people claim. we are not just an invention of your boogeyman.

>>5419280
I'd recommend ice skating, walking up and down stairs if you can't go to a gym. Another great thing is push ups and planking to improve the line of the shoulders to a more masculine line. To slim the hips, I'd recommend doing ballet tondus--even though it's a feminine sport, when I was in ballet pre-transition, my hips did slim down.

>>5423642
>a few extra black hairs on your chin that you can literally shave off apparently as triggering as having two bags of meat hanging off your chest
yeah. no, i don't buy this and think you're bein melodramatic to prove a point
>>5423661
>the word genderqueer has existed since the 70s
has it? cuz i personally can't find sources that say anything before the mid-90s. but let's be honest here any self described non-binary person has the overwhelming likelihood that they're in their 20s and have a fucking identity politics blog.
>we are not just an invention of your boogeyman
more like an invention of yourselves.

>>5423723
do you somehow not realize that after being on t long enough some people can grow full beards? it wasn't just the hairs i saw, it was the anticipation of more since i know how hairy my family is, just as some trans kids dread the effects of puberty even as they're only beginning to experience them.

you can stay in denial if you like; i know very clearly what physical dysphoria feels like and i know what my experience is. and i know plenty more nonbinary people with clearly strong dysphoria, enough to know that i'm really not alone in this.

>>5423744
>do you somehow not realize that after being on t long enough some people can grow full beards?
obviously i do but since you just started growing your beard recently you won't have much in the way of facial hair and probably won't for a couple years anyway unless you're very lucky (or unlucky, in your case).
>you can stay in denial if you like
i don't think i am really in denial of anything desu. you say "non-binary", i say "it's a new term and i'm skeptical of it, and why is it even necessary anyway when gender non-conforming seems to fit the bill just as well?"

>>5423831
gender non-conforming doesn't fit the bill at all, though. that's talking about gender roles and presentation rather than identity & dysphoria - tons of totally cis people are gender nonconforming, because "conformity" is talking about the arbitrary social aspects of gender, not the aspects that actually exist in the body and the brain from the start.

>>5423715

lol i wasn't the one asking for advice, but thanks anyway... i actually don't really have an issue with my weight or hips etc so yeah...

>>5423925
>>5423715

+ but this is all good advice for >>5419066
>>5419088

also >>5419457
you have*

MtF here, why are my fellow trannies 90% weird sissies
sure you guys have tumblr tards but at least it gets semi-funny when they realize that they aren't trans and are stuck with beards
but "mine" just try to be even more obnoxious and sissy like

>tfw not one of the cool kids
props to you guys and I hope your srs gets better soon

>>5423974
I once stopped in to /m2fg/ to ask for advice and never went back. I can safely say that everyone there is a vile, horrible person.

>>5424041
yeah they are pretty vile
go to thg or hell even tlg is better than mtfg if you have questions
since I'm not FtM I'll fuck off now and apologize for my kind being such a bag of insufferable cunts and me bothering you guys
if. you people have any amab related questions I'll gladly answer them tho

>>5424053
Not him, but we have non-ftm's who hang out here too. You're more than welcome to stick around and chill, but these generals are pretty slow.

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Just finished consult for top surgery. Surgery date set for March 2nd, Wheez.

Hope your holidays and new years have good thing coming ftmgen.

>>5424198
Congrats man, I'm jealous. Hope all goes well for you.

>>5423189
1. She's not trans.
2. If she somehow manages to get past all the gatekeeping, she will be on T a few months, detransition, and likely turn into one of those toxic radfems.
3. Just leave her now, she's not worth it.

>>5423426
You realize in non-white societies that "nonbinary" identities were shit reserved for eunuchs, homos, and trans people (ie. they're not a real boy/girl so they're some ~third~ gender instead).

Hell, I don't even have a problem with nonbinary people on their own but goddamn I'm sick of hearing them go "BUT MUH PRE-COLONIAL SOCIETIES HAD THIRD GENDERS"

>>5424702
shut up retard

>>5423843
identity an dysphoria do indeed fall under gender nonconformity though. even slightly questioning your gender, being kind of between male and female, or even transitioning from say female to male, etc, it's all gender nonconformity to some degree or another.
if you want to talk about your dysphoria and identity you'll generally be required to be more specific than non-binary anyway, so it's not even a very useful word. and i don't know how familiar with this you'll be obviously but according to nonbinary wiki itself, non binary is just an umbrella term for a plethora of even more lesser-known and specific terms to describe the degrees to which a person mentally identifies as male or female, or a mixture of both, and it pretty goddamn ridiculous how any of this is presented as supposedly informative or helpful to a person.
>xenogender for fuck's sake
it's not something i can be reasonably expected to take seriously ..

>>5422852
it is at the moment, but i've spent a lot of time on /x/, /mu/ and /r9k/ in the past (and still go on /r9k/ when i feel like shit and just want to interact with horrible people with sad lives)

>>5424702
>ie. they're not a real boy/girl so they're some ~third~ gender instead
This. Shit like two-spirit native americans, that was typically reversed for feminine males that didn't fit the traditional masculine roles. Not all 'other' genders follow the same rules, obviously but they mostly came about due to people not fitting gender roles.

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I've reached a point where I stop telling new (online) acquaintances I am trans, and just say male.

>meet someone I really like
>we don't actually talk much (writing partner, when we interact it's mostly business)
>stalk her comment history on reddit and find out she incorporated one of her obscure fetishes into our story
>start having some slightly affectionate feels
>I never thought being stealth would bother me. It's all I ever wanted... yet I feel so weird about the fact she thinks I'm cis. But if I come out I'd get an immediate demotion in her mind.. dickless man.
>feels kinda bad man

>>5424833
if you consider ordinary binary trans people gender non-conforming, why should we keep using the word trans? that's also a more general term that won't tell others the specifics of your identity and dysphoria, so what use does it have? why should we organize animals into phyla when they contain so many disparate species?

among people who are aware of nonbinary identity, telling them i'm nonbinary gives them plenty of info, even if they need some more to understand my specific situation - but that's true of all labels to different extents. knowing a guy is gay doesn't tell you exactly what types of people he's into, what his dating style is or what he likes in bed. it just lets you know he's into dudes & not women. i, like many nonbinary people, don't have a more specific identity than "nonbinary," because i don't need one and none of them really fit anyway. it's not an umbrella term like "lgbt," for example, where no one identifies purely as the acronym. the more specific labels are useful for some people, though, and there's no reason why they shouldn't exist at all, even if most people should have no obligation to learn them all. some don't make any sense, but i don't really care what people i don't care about call themselves unless it's harming themselves or others.

>>5425086

should probably stop assuming you know exactly what she's gonna think or feel... that kinda shit doesn't matter to everyone...

i mean shit i know i don't give a shit... i think someone has one thing, they have the other and it works and we can still fuck around then why would i care? and i've known a lot of people who wouldn't care so... she could easily be one of them...

you're just expecting bad shit cuz you're nervous and you feel uncomfortable with the fact that you're trans... and i get that, being trans is far from a confidence boosting experience... but that doesn't mean you can predict how people feel...

Lads, lately grills have been telling me I smell like clean laundry. While that's certainly not the worst thing in the world, I want to change my scent in order to attract more evolutionarily-sound women. How can I man up my musk?

>inb4 use cologne, I do

>>5425086
Are you me? I'm in this exact same fucking situation with a guy I had no intentions of getting involved with. Which is funny because I normally go for girls, but he and I hit it off after being friends for a couple months and now he likes me too. It's killing me.

>>5425445
Try working out in the mornings. And personally I prefer non-scented washes and sprays so my natural manly scent™ comes through more easily

Also I dunno why ftm gen blows up in outrage whenever nonbinary people are mentioned. Like I get that we're conflated with them, and with that comes the derision people reserve for them...but are we really so callous as to deny their lived experiences when most of our problems with society come from people disbelieving us and our existence?

>>5425556
I think ftm tend to be a bit more sensitive about the whole non-binary thing just because of all the shit that has come out of tumblr. It's probably a lot of insecurities on their part, but I can't deny tumblr has left a bad taste in my mouth over certain things as well.

>>5421349
I'd be a terrible boyfriend anon, but thank you

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>>5425711
but you're adorable and look like a nerd

>>5425711
What makes you say that?

>>5425174
trans/transgender/transsexual are great descriptors when you need to disclose yourself as medically/socially transitioning. gender is a common word, transgender/transsexual as a concept is fairly well known already.
nonbinary doesn't give anyone any specific information other than they identify as somewhere between a man and a woman -- to whatever insane varying degree that they can somehow quantify, and need specific wildly varying terms for, for some reason. although that's only if you go deeper into the wiki.
but if a man or a woman can be nonbinary you say you still require more information from them, as opposed to trans/transgender man/woman or ftm/mtf . these short terms better describe the situation for trans+ gender non-conforming. that segues nicely into if binary trans are nonconforming why should we keep using the word trans? because not everyone who's non-conforming is cis, of course. unless you propose there be no such distinction between transitioned people and cis gender non-conforming people. but we both know that's a ridiculous leap to take and would confuse us even more.
you yourself are in the ftm thread, you only qualified yourself as non-binary because you had a frankly over-reaction to growing some facial hair (after taking medication that you knew would have such an effect regardless of how hirsute your family are). i'm sure many here know mixed emotions towards transitioning, and varying amounts of dysphoria too, but it isn't really sound to assume you're actually an xenogender (created by tumblr user i-forget-the-name) because you experience those things. non-binary is exactly the same principal.

>>5425556
>>5425571
>blows up in outrage
i haven't been hostile but i don't see why i should take non-binary genders seriously when it doesn't make sense, seems to be born out of insecurity, and only confounds even more.

>>5425881
I'm glad using capitals seem to trigger you or some shit.
Makes it easy to recognize your posts and your rambling, pseudo-intellectual bullshit.
Not the non-binary person, before you insinuate. Just a trans guy lurker who thinks you're a twat.

>>5426298
i'm a twat because i don't agree with him, ok..
>I'm glad using capitals seem to trigger you or some shit
and you're a bigger twat for not realising the anon i was having that entire long fucking conversation with used all lowercase letters too, shitlord. you're not even fucking original either i mentioned being triggered earlier. >>5423723
you have nothing to add, no rebuttal or anything, you probably tapped out after 5 sentences or some shit.
i was fairly civil with the other guy but you can fuck off.

>/ftm/gen: invalidated nonbinaries edition

Tell me about your kintypes.

>>5426437
>shitlord
yasss queen slay yasssss

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>>5426533
I'm not a furry or an otherkin, but I wish I had been born a doge.

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>>5426533
>implying we're all not shapeshifting chimeras

desu a lot of time in my head I feel like I consider myself outside of the human species to cope with dysphoria. like im just an alien or chimera, and my body is normal.

has anyone bought from shapeshifters before? I like the idea of supporting unique binders, and something I can wear without being terrified of it showing beneath my clothes

http://shapeshiftersinc.storenvy.com/products

im considering buying their snake binder, or snider, as it is aptly named.

buying new binders for coolegg, gonna pick up 2 extra underworks too. but I might go a size up. I have 2 grossly tight ones already and honestly even if they're a bit loose hopefuly it'll be incentive to work out more. also want to write a letter to my provost about a few awesome teachers that really made the difference during my transition.

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Qt Australian MtF here
Requesting qt FtM bf

>>5426915
same tbqh f a m

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I haven't smoked weed in quite a long time, but I decided to tonight with a friend because I've been so fucking stressed lately. Is it normal for that shit to amplify your insecurities and worries and make you depressed as all fuck once you sober up?

I'm sitting here wavering between heavy depression and wanting to an hero.

>>5427001
eh, sounds like you had a strong reaction. it can bring up a lot of stuff that was beneath the surface and amplify it. if that was a depressed feeling before, then it could bring that up too but there are probably myriad other factors you're not mentioning other than weed.. how were you feeling before you smoked?

>>5427066
I was feeling tired and had a lot of shit on my mind admittedly. Shit that has been giving me anxiety nearly every single day for months.

>>5425445
Tarragon Noir--its a rip off at the dollar store and I swear it smells like pure man
Also I've heard good things about using aquavelve from the drug store (An after shave)

>>5427001

sometimes... i know for me sometimes it can cause a lot of introspective thinking which brings that kinda shit up...

especially if it's been a while and i'm not in the right state of mind when i smoke it...

when it's been a while you gotta be in a decent place or it can get kinda shitty cuz you aren't as used to the high...

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do you ever feel like you're a ftm stereotype? it sucks, and i wish i could stop falling into preset tropes for people like me. i dont necessarily wanna be a special snowflake or whatever but i dont really wanna be treated like im some stereotypical ftm thats some yaoi fangirl with a fetish or some psycho fag hag that tries to manipulate gay men into sleeping with me... makes me want to get different interests and fit some other mold that would earn me less ridicule, especially from the lgbt community.

>>5427190
It's good to know that's not an uncommon thing. It's probably been a about 3 or so years since I've smoked on top of feeling like shit. I figured I might be fine because I was with a friend, but he was just quiet and staring at the tv the entire time.

>>5425742
>look like a nerd
That is me 100%

>>5425788
I've never been in a romantic relationship before but I've been told that I can be cold and distant and generally uncommunicative. But I can be pretty introverted so it's kind of difficult for me to change it. I'd like to think that once I find someone that I can be really comfortable around I'd be more open emotionally buuutt so far no luck haha. Tbh I just wanna meet a guy who I can cuddle and watch crime dramas with.

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>>5427411
>Tbh I just wanna meet a guy who I can cuddle and watch crime dramas with.

I like to watch crime dramas although I find them to be silly sometimes.

looking for someone to smoke and chill with in cali area anyone down ayyyy

>>5427425
like Hannibal? lol. they often take themselves too seriously.

What do FtMs think of chaser cis men who only treat them like males until they want to fuck?
What if he was a fantastic fuck?

>>5427535
>like Hannibal?

Haven't watched it but sounds neat. I mostly watch bones with my mum and Law and Order with my grandparents.

>>5427545
>who only treat them like males until they want to fuck?

what exactly does this entail? as long as you dont call me "baby girl" or some cringey shit like that i'd be dtf

>>5427545
Prove ur a fantastic fuck?

>>5427535
>>5427547
Hannibal started off promising(aside from the whole cliche of giving the crime solver 145125454 mental disorders that give him special powers to solve a case) but good lord did that shit get stupid. I think I officially stopped watching when someone was killing people with a fucking fossil.
I'm actually really annoyed that it seems every tv show I get into turns into complete shit. Vikings, Shameless, Hannibal.. Only ones I can think of. I don't watch many.

>>5427545
You're going to have to be more specific about that.

>>5427001
swim who is on SSRI's can get like that, you've just got to change the vibes here. Try some Carbon Based Lifeforms, Crisopa, Tim Hecker? Depending on the strain, burnout can be a thing a few hours after. Drink more coffee/tea, it can make you less stressed/ depressed- afterward or in general.

Will you guys answer this poll about bottom dysphoria? I just want to know if I'm the only one with such horrible dysphoria that I refuse to be in sexual relationships.. Seems rare.

http://strawpoll.me/6334499

>>5426787
I would be terrified if that showed up beneath by clothes

>>5427352
>internalized transphobia
Fuck society, or what "people generally think"- it is riddled with misconception from assumption. Don't internalize the bullshit you may very well be reading from this website, boredom and shitpost culture creates conflict dynamics that don't necessarily exist IRL. What is real is you and your friends, your associations, your highs, your orgasms, your hopes, your plans- as long as your ego is functioning correctly it should be okay. Most people aren't trying not to be stereotypical anyways.

>>5427876
vibrasphere

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>>5427906

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>>5427906

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>>5427941
guarantee he was jerking off while typing that

>>5427905
>>internalized transphobia

yeah I kind of have that pretty bad... i wish i could make it stop

>as long as your ego is functioning correctly

I wish...

that's some pretty solid advice though, thanks. I just care too much about what other people think

This might be a dumb question for this place, but an online friend of mine wants to send me a gift. Am I able to have it sent to my address without giving a surname and only giving her my first name? Sorry, I just don't really have any other place to ask and my Google-fu is shit. I have my reasons for this.

>>5428196
make a new Amazon with fake name and make a wish list

>>5428196
It doesn't matter what the name is, only the address. I've had mail sent to me using my online name. However, I'd give a fake last name just so it's less suspicious looking.

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Could I be "FtM" just because I don't look like a precious ideal perfect kawaii animu gir?
Because I think I'll magically turn into a hot guy and being a hot guy would be better than being an ugly girl?
Could I just be in denial about it all when it's true?

If I had to choose between being a cute girl and a hot guy, I... fuck, really don't know which one I'd choose. Sometimes I wish I could shapeshift and transform into both whenever I wanted. Heh.

I want to cry in frustration. Fuck me in the ass senpai. I already came out to my close family.

>be me
>18
>live with my mother
>from her point of view I've been a pretty masculine kid since I was at least 3-4, knew I was trans since I was 6 but knew it was wrong so never blabbed about it to mother even when I was little
>ever since I was 12/allowed to pick my own clothes I've been picking men's clothes/masculine clothes
>been pissed off at me for years for acting like this, pissed that I'd never do girly things and that my friends were all boys, pissed that I dressed the way I did
>"embrace your feminity, you ARE A WOMAN, anon" speech non stop for years
>just deludes herself into thinming I'm a tomboy
>cut all my hair off a few months ago
>asks me just about every day if I'm trans/a lesbian
>tells me; "If you are transgender, please tell me so we can get you the psychological help you need"
>we don't have the money for that and I don't want to get some sort of shock therapy

What do I do, /lgbt/? Any modern therapist would recommend that I transition, we don't have that kind of money and she'd somehow think it's my fault that I'm like this and hate me but I might actually be able to get on T, advice?

>>5428336
You got issues, pal. Transitioning will not make your life easier because you think you'll be more attractive if you do.

>>5428336
frankly you will probably end up looking like an average guy, or equally ugly. and when you realize looking like an an okay guy isnt worth constant injections and health risks and paperwork, you will probably change your mind. but at that point youll have a deep voice and a hairy chest, neither of which will change back if you stop injecting.

instead of trying to look like a hot guy and potentially ruining your life, you should consider either A) accepting your flaws or B) fixing your flaws through exercise or cosmetic surgery. both of these options are cheaper and safer than transitioning.

anybody else get really bad acne after T? i had no acne before and now i have a ton, i figured it would go away but its been a few years. ive tried washing my face etc, used a few acne creams but havent made much effort besides that. id rather avoid taking straight up acne medication, but if anyone has found a cream or bought something over the counter that has worked id like to hear about it.

ITT: Dykes on testosterone hoping straight girls will ever want to be with them despite the fact that they look like short, effeminate, dickless "men".

>>5428511
Ok

>>5427887
No, I also avoid relationships due to bottom dysphoria. I'm not doing the survey though.

>>5425881
>because not everyone who's non-conforming is cis, of course
exactly the reason why i've been arguing that nonbinary is a useful term. most nonbinary people aren't cis either, and while not as many of us medically transition, many of us do and that's a useful thing for any potential partners to know.

i brought up being nonbinary not because of my facial hair dysphoria but because you (or maybe someone else, it's been awhile now) claimed that nonbinary people don't exist & i wanted to respond.

my physical dysphoria towards facial hair isn't the only thing that made me consider myself nonbinary; i just know that skeptics generally only take physical dysphoria seriously so that's what i mentioned. i also have mild social dysphoria towards some male terms (son/mister/etc.). it's mild enough that i never make a big deal about it to most people (not nearly as strong as social dysphoria towards any female terms/pronouns, which is seriously debilitating), but still made my gender more clear to me. and if you consider physical dysphoria an "overreaction," as if it's something that can be controlled, you might want to reconsider what thread you're in. just because i know a medication has unwanted side effects doesn't mean i shouldn't have taken it in the first place when there's no magic side-effect-free version on the market. in fact as soon as facial hair started to be a problem i stopped t, saved up for an at-home laser hair remover, and am trying to get back on t now that i have one.

i don't see why i have to prove the term "xenogender" valid & useful in order to make it clear that i am not your usual ftm and "nonbinary" is a useful term for making that clear. i don't even know what xenogender means, whether it just means you feel like some outsider gender or whether you're alienkin or something.

>>5428511
>When transwomen visit ftmgen

>>5427382

i've been there after going a couple of months, it's never even been a year for me... when i get like that it helps me to write or do something distracting like that (guitar as well, but that's more private) when there's no one to talk to that shit helps

i've also noticed if my anxiety has been really bad lately smoking tends to make me think about it... even if it hasn't been a while, like just all the causes and shit, for me though even if it sucks in the moment i kinda see it as a positive cuz it forces me to think about important shit...

feeling any better?

>>5427782

i only got through the first episode of hannibal, and i couldn't pay attention to it... thought it was boring as fuck, but i don't like crime dramas so that probably doesn't help...

The doctor I'll be seeing in a couple months is a good 2-4 hours away from me just by car alone. After I see them, is it possible to start getting T from my regular family doctor or will I constantly have to fucking somehow find a way out there every single time I need a refill? They're the closest doctor that deals with trans patients, but my doctor knows I'm trans too.

>>5428336

i don't see why being hot really factors into it... i mean, that shit doesn't really make a difference, dysphoria is gonna be there even if people find you attractive so i don't see how that would be a bonus...

i went through an overcompensating feminine phase to try to hide and deny being trans, and honestly? it just made me feel more uncomfortable, and shitty... and every time someone hit on me i felt awkward cuz i felt like i was lying to them, and like they were gonna somehow find out i was a guy and hate me for "tricking" them, which is funny cuz i've never felt like that when people assume i'm a guy... even though i know with the way people can feel about transpeople that'd be considered "tricking" someone... as a matter of fact doing that was when i started binding and shit and forced me to admit i was trans to myself cuz it got too uncomfortable and shitty for me...

why do you assume you'll be hot as a guy if you don't find yourself attractive now?

>>5428410
>>5428489
Yeah, I know. Heh, yeah, I definitely have issues too.
I know all that, I wasn't saying otherwise. But I just... I'm afraid. I definitely feel dysphoria, now whether it's just dysphoria OR gender/sex dysphoria, that's what I can't pinpoint yanno

>>5428907
I don't think I'll magically turn hot, not consciously at least. I think by "hot" maybe I mean more "comfortable with myself".

It's a fucking mess

>>5428954
Describe your dysphoria to us then. Do you feel anything about your chest, vagina, body shape, thighs, voice, social dysphoria or anything else.

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>>5428907
>i felt like i was lying to them, and like they were gonna somehow find out i was a guy and hate me for "tricking" them
I think I get that too. I liken it to being a dog in a suit, doing my best to do human things but constantly anxious that someone will notice.
>"hello fellow humans, i am here to office work"
>"there's something off about you"
>"i don't know what you mean, i am holding a briefcase like everyone else here"
>"wait a second..."
>pretend to sweat profusely
>"shit, you're a fucking dog!"
>piss on the floor, bark a lot and run away

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>>5428548
>I'm not like those other ftms, I'm special!

>>5428997
being "special" isn't an inherently good trait, and i'm not purposely deciding to be an unusual gender because i mistakenly think it makes me a better person. but sure, go ahead and tell me about all the other ftms who are uncomfortable with being called male and feel dysphoric enough towards facial hair that they willingly stopped taking t to stop its growth.

>>5428972
huh. Well, I hate my tits... I need them chopped off. I just need to. Even if I eventually come to identify as a girl or whatever again, I need my chest flat. I can't stand my tits. I just can't.

My shoulders are wide. For masculinity, I like them, but for femininity... It makes me look like a fucking hon.

I'm also naturally very hairy.

I really hate some of my feminine curves too, as much as I like my legs a lil, surprisingly. My hips, my ass, my thighs, y'know the drill. My lips are really plump and feminine too and so are my eyes; my eyelashes are naturally long and my face overall is pudgy.

I wish my voice wasn't so high and cracking and screechy.

I don't like my vagina. Maybe it's because I'm a fuckin roastie, I dunno. I don't know if I'd like a dick either though because I'm scared that, since I wasn't born with one, I'd never get used to a sausage constantly rubbing against my thighs and fabric. Otherwise? I think I'd prefer one, definitely, but not a fucking frankendick

Overall I'm still really feminine, a pansy, a faggot, I like "girly" things, art, fashion, etc, and I'm really sensitive and "cutesy" now and then, I'm extremely submissive even though on rare occasions I like being dominant or at least power bottom, and...

And yet, I seem to get along better with other men, for some reason.

I like most male clothes (I'm picky, but that happened with female clothes too anyway) if that matters; i know clothes =/= gender.
However... Sometimes, I like, uh, "crossdressing", I guess
I like pampering myself up and putting on a wig and look like a doll or something, but I... I like it only in terms of aesthetic and maybe sexuality. Deep down I know it's not me-- Well it is, but not... "Me" me.

Shit, I really can't explain, you know?

I think I like... being androgynous. Sometimes I just wish I had nothin down there 2bh familia. I dunno. I definitely got issues that even therapy don't seem to fix.

I just don't wanna suffer anymore. Feels bad man

>>5429054
while actually removing the clitoris really isn't something that's done in by qualified surgeons, be aware that you can get a vaginectomy (removal & sewing shut of the vagina) without need for a phalloplasty or metoidioplasty as well, if you truly do have genital dysphoria. it can take a little work to find a surgeon who'll do it, but it's been done before and the "i want to wait for genital surgeries to get better" point is a good one in your favor.

>>5428954

my bad then... sounded like it was all about attractiveness...

>>5428973

yeah, it feels like putting on a costume and a show and just lying to everyone... it's a pretty nerve wracking and miserable experience...

>>5429054

eh i actually sorta get this... in the sense that i imagine it'd be more comfortable to just be nothing than not quite one thing, or feeling like i'm lying to everyone by pretending i'm just a cis chick...

androgyny is more of a comfort zone than anything... like better than nothing changing and complete dysphoria, but not particularly ideal anyway... but in all honesty i don't think there's an actual ideal with being trans at this point in time given the surgery options and whatnot...

>>5429035
My mistake. Perhaps I should have said "deeply confused" instead of "special."

>>5429324
so how am i the one who's confused, exactly?

>>5429137
>>5428907
I get it both ways. In person it feels like I'm lying to people who see me as a woman because I don't even think of myself as a woman at ALL so it feels weird as shit to me to be gendered female. But if I'm talking with people online, especially those who start having romantic feelings for me and think I'm a cis male is when it becomes the opposite issue.

>>5429690

well with that it's different cuz then it's just "but i'm trans" not "but i'm a chick" ever, you know? which i know isn't how everyone on the other end is gonna see it, but yeah... it's different, i see it as less of lie cuz the other shit is a costume pretty much...

>>5429721
>which i know isn't how everyone on the other end is gonna see it
Yeah, that's the problem. Unless they know what you look or sound like (and if you actually pass that is), it's hard not to wonder if they're just going to see you as some girl trying to "be one of the boys" or some shit.

I've gotten lucky with some of my online friends, but I've definitely had issues with others. Some of the ones I have now are questionable about telling as well. A lot of people just still don't get it or don't want to even try.

>>5429838

i guess i don't really have that issue cuz the people i know and have always gravitated towards tend to not give a shit and be pretty open minded and accepting...

but i'm not too bothered by how other people view shit to be honest... i can't control it, and if they're respectful and understanding great... if not i find that i don't really care for them and then i don't give a shit what they think... it changes my view of them cuz i base it on how i see trans people other than myself... i tend to excuse shit more if it's directed at me, but when i think of it like "would i respect this person if we both knew someone trans and they behaved this way towards them?" and that can change a lot...

>>5428854
I have a 2 hour train ride to my doc. I'm able to get refills and dosage adjustments over the phone, although he does want to see me every few months.

Whether your regular doc will prescribe is at their discretion. Just ask and search new docs in your town if they say no.

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Hh I feel like an attention seeker doing this But ... d-do I pass

>>5430044
Almost. Don't slouch your shoulders, it gives you a girl frame.

>>5430044
Would date.

I pass as male like 95% of the time, the problem is I pass as a twelve year old when I'm an adult.

>You guys are out on break now, right?
>I'm... not in school... I graduated.
>Oh, wow, really? I thought you were in middle school!
>Nope, college graduate.
>Uhhh
>Yeah okay bye.

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>>5430059
Sorry I'm pushing my shoulders forward because not wearing binder
>>5430073
Whut Honestly?

>>5430044
acne/10

>>5430114
pass

>>5430114
Nah, your face and eyes are too rounded, you look like a 14 year old homestuck tumblr weeb. Seriously take care of yourself

>>5430129
I've been trying to deal with mY shit Acne for years pls give tips on clearing it

>>5430142
you look like you need to take a shower desu

>>5430114
Hypothetically yes. Mostly because I dig the i-dont-give-a-fuck hairstyle of the first pic.

>>5430142

go see a dermatologist

>>5430145
>tfw legit just got out of shower and still look gross

>>5427425
I love how silly they can be! It's something I can half-pay attention to which is why I like them so much. I like watching crime shows and food network when I'm bored or trying to fall asleep.

>>5430142

try tea tree oil, apple cider vinegar, manuka honey, witch hazel, and other assorted shit i'm sure i'm forgetting

>>5430309

+ shit like clean pillow cases, dietary changes, drinking a lot of water etc help too...

>>5430322
>>5430309
how much does smoking and drinking affect acne, and yeah I really need a diet change

>>5430365

they're both shit for your skin honestly...

>>5430181
>I like watching crime shows and food network when I'm bored or trying to fall asleep.

Sounds comfy. Wish I could be your friend and watch crime shows with you anon. ;_;

>>5426787
lmao look at the pictures of their models...not even trying

i guess i can't blame anyone for wearing that kind of stuff, but i wouldn't. maybe it's nice for closeted people to relieve dysphoria and pass it off as just a tight tank top or something

>>5427352
this is probably my biggest hangup wrt trans stuff honestly. whenever people talk about straight girls fetishising gays or butch lesbians who are jealous of dudes it makes me want to kill myself. even though i know i have real dysphoria and a lot of the warning signs, there's always the thought that if i'm wrong somehow i'm just some creepy girl lying to myself.

>>5430455
fuck well I guess I´ll try cutting back a bit

>>5427545
I'm sure really not as great at sex as you think you are, dude.

>>5427906
embarrassing

>>5430044
no, you look like a mexican girl who has a mental illness, and the only time you see her, is that one time when you're getting your mail, and shes being hauled off in an ambulance to the loony bin.

lose weight and start lifting. you look like you have little to no muscle and a scrawny neck, even skinny men have muscle. also get tighter clothes (baggy clothes makes you look crazy) get a haircut or grow it out and wash your face

>>5430488

good luck with that shit, i've gotta be sober tomorrow, and i'm already dreading it... actually maybe not i could probably get alcohol... my point is it might not even be a day and i'm just like "nah i don't feel like it yet"

i do sometimes, but now isn't one of them... i've been like high every day thinking "i feel like being sober for a bit, but i'll start as soon as i finish all of this"

i can only cut down when i replace shit with something else usually... i mean i've been like sober and shit before, but since i was 15 i'd say i probably haven't gone more than a year without some shit... like at least a few binges and since i was 20... i think the longest i've been totally sober is probably a month or two

though you might not do either as often as me...

>>5427352
>i dont really wanna be treated like im some stereotypical ftm thats some yaoi fangirl with a fetish or some psycho fag hag that tries to manipulate gay men into sleeping with me

you spend too much time on this board. no one thinks this except the gay men of /lgbt/

>>5430577
I havent been sober this entire month mostly because of stressful stuff lmao
>i feel like being sober for a bit, but i'll start as soon as i finish all of this
same

>>5430574
Been trying to work out more often and I really nneed a haircut in agreement

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They've been playing the
"Johns Hopkins surgeons plan first U.S. penis transplant"
on fox news all day today and they keep saying "It's central to their identity, this will restore a full sense of well being"

it's depressing af

>>5430142
Astringent and warm water.

>>5430602

i'm honestly not sure when the last time i was sober an entire day was... over a month i think, fuck if i know it's really hard for me to keep track of time...

and i think the last time i was it was maybe for 3 days and before that it'd been a while

>>5428548
>exactly the reason why i've been arguing that nonbinary is a useful term
that isn't an argument for it being a useful term, and you kind of disregarded my points on why it isn't particularly useful to begin with. there's no reason to have non-binary as a vague addendum when aren't you essentially identifying yourself as a ftm/transguy first anyways? functionally non-binary doesn't really serve a purpose, for it to have any meaning you have to go into detail about your dysphoria anyway, and i don't think mixed feelings like that are really uncommon if you're starting out transitioning in that way.
>and if you consider physical dysphoria an "overreaction,"
i was talking about your specific situation with the facial hair, not the dysphoria in general. so yes i do think it was an overreaction considering there are ways to control your emotions and redirect your train of thought and stuff like that; and you must have understood what was likely to happen before you started t., and it even had a clear solution to you eventually ... and having too much facial hair? be thankful that if you don't want to grow a beard, you're afab so it's probably not going to be a huge concern especially for you now that you can laser it.
>you might want to reconsider what thread you're in
i've been here a while desu. but i'm getting off track and i've said about as much as i want with this for now. sorry for the delay i guess but i've been doing shit.
polite sage for massive text.

>>5430679
Different person here-
Nonbinary is a useful term because only tumblrfucks will remember what my gender actually is.

>>5430679
except i only ever call myself "ftm" or a "trans man" with people i don't trust enough to be honest with. they're not useful terms for me because they're inaccurate. i spend time here and feel empathy for trans men because we have plenty in common, but we are not the same. literally everyone whom i know i can trust, including immediate family, knows i'm nonbinary, and i use they pronouns as well as he.

i've already confronted your points on why a term including a variety of smaller categories is in no way automatically useless; i certainly didn't disregard them.

so why is my facial hair dysphoria less valid than other kinds of dysphoria? why is it totally controllable through mental exercises, unlike other types of dysphoria? why is the fact that i knew it would eventually come supposed to make it somehow different? why do you think i was somehow losing my mind about this dysphoria when i just brought it up to make a point about my nonbinary gender? this "overreaction" thing is just an assumption you really want to cling to; it's not based in logic.

i know you mentioned not wanting to say more and i don't want to force you to continue since i like this general being more civil than /lgbt/ as a whole, but i didn't want to just let inaccuracies about myself & my gender be part of the last word on the topic.

>>5430872
i understand wanting to address some final things, but i think i am just going to leave this one and agree to disagree with you on the matter. but thanks for being quite pleasant to have this discussion with anyway, despite the obvious. have a good evening, or whatever!

>>5430044
I would also date you, you're cute

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>>5427906
>changing pronouns to female while you fuck them
hilarious post though

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>>5430457
If only!

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>>5428336
>Could I be "FtM" just because I don't look like a precious ideal perfect kawaii animu gir?
>Because I think I'll magically turn into a hot guy and being a hot guy would be better than being an ugly girl?


Some guys do turn to hot guys from ugly girls though.

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just when i was worried i was gonna have to be sober tonight my bro brought this home and gave it to my s/o and i... too bad it's jager, but i'll drink it anyway...

How easy is it to get your letter in one appointment?

>>5431816
I love jager, what's your beef?

>>5432090
Don't count on it.

>>5432158

it isn't whiskey...

>>5431816
"This herbal liqueur was developed and dedicated to hunters that have strong bonds with one another"

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>tfw perfect body for FtM (5'10", square jawline)
>tfw weird dysphoria

Dunno what to do lads. It's nowhere near as bad as y'all get it. I remember being a teenager with a short haircut and seeing a 100% passing guy in the mirror, made me have a full-blown panic attack. On the other hand sometimes I feel this disgusting alien feeling seeing a girl there. It's this awful goddamn pendulum and I don't know if it's because of social failure, or an actual minor dysphoric problem.

>>5432276
Those birds just fucked or are about to.

>>5427525
north cali or south?

i'm a fucking coward + cannot force myself to give myself my shots
i have a friend help me
i h8 being so ineffectual

>>5432266

guess i should kill something before i drink it... found weed i forgot i had last night so there was no need...

>>5433070

not everyone can do it themselves, and at least you have someone to do it... you never know how you'll feel in the future

>>5432276

you probably do know what it is, you just haven't spent enough time reflecting on it... why do you think it's social? did passing bother you cuz you were pre-everything and that made you feel uncomfortable? levels of dysphoria vary to begin with, and are usually dependent on what people start with, so it makes sense that in your position it's not the same as what someone else might feel...

>>5433070
could you switch to androgel or the other testosterone gel? daily application is annoying but painless

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went to the liquor store today... saw this, never noticed it before... dogs on wine labels are just weird...

>>5433415
>made with organic dogs

>>5433070
Are you me? I've had to make my boyfriend give me my shot for the last five years. I'm so bad with needles I still have to close my eyes while he's doing it. I'm actually waiting for my next endo appointment to discuss switching to gel.

>>5433163
i want the quick effects! it feels so good to be on the 0.5 ml dose of t. i was on .25 and it wasn't enough, and i've heard the gel is even less effective
thanks tho...

>>5433658
Is that 200mg/ml? Because 100mg, unless you're taking that every week or are extremely tiny, is still pretty low. I'm assuming you're just starting testosterone and tapering up to a maintenance dose, but I'd take your anecdotal knowledge of androgel with a grain of salt. The idea is to regulate with smaller doses more frequently, so in the end the difference in effect would be negligible and highly dependent on genetics more than anything.

>>5433658
i find gel to be effective personally, even needed to lower the doses over time because its been too much. it still is a pain in the ass to find the right dosage which unfortunately means irregular bleeding for me. and it does suck, but other than that i cant really complain about the effects
as >>5433727 said its genetics for ya

i dunno if having difficulty finding the right dosage is common in general and/or more so with gel
but it does make me want to switch up to something monthly or quarterly and administered by a nurse, cuz i hate needles too

>>5433621

hopefully they're free range too...

we ended up getting maple whiskey and champagne though...i'll probably never know what dog wine tastes like, liquor stores have too many choices

>>5433872
i usually dont drink because i get sick of it very quickly what with headaches (not literally throwing up) but your alcoholposting has got me all festive and i wanna buy something tasty that will also get me fucked up
like a creamy liqueur
it is kinda nice to be spoiled for choice tho

>>5433893

i get sick usually too, i never used to, but since i've had all the health issues and whatnot drinking is different... it's a bit like playing russian roulette i'll either have a good time, or i'll be a mess with extreme headaches, weird jaw pain (it's excruciating), no balance and stiff joints and muscles etc after like a shot or half a cup of wine... or extreme stomach pain for a couple days after is another one, but i like being drunk sometimes and holidays (how else do you celebrate a holiday other than binge drinking for a few days?) so i risk it since i can never guess beforehand what will happen...

i'm probably gonna have my little bro pick up some rum too before he gets here tonight... i'm either making eggnog or coquito idk which yet

i actually don't have a ton of recommendations on creamy stuff though cuz i don't drink that, but it is alcoholic egg nog time...

i get overwhelmed when i have choices, i'm extremely indecisive... i've done shit like cut a bagel into 5 pieces cuz i couldn't figure out what i wanted on it so i had to try everything, and then still been unsure of what i would've preferred... so having a ton of choices makes it really hard

>>5431644
Got a Skype/PSN/etc? We could be internet buddies.

Hey brooklyn, it's S. My instagram won't load your messages, just thought I'd let you know. Dunno what's going on with it.

>>5434516

hey, mine was doing that before it's retarded sometimes... i'm not sure why i'm responding here instead of trying to text you, i'm drunk...

>>5434585

+ unless you have a different # now... cuz that text app sucked and maybe you don't still use it...

I should probably head to the liquor store because I have no champagne or sake or bourbon and it closes in two hours

I'll pretend it's for christmas but it's because I hate everything and myself more than usual

>>5434666
Hey man, me too! I need to head there myself. Good to know I'm not the only one here miserable over the holidays. I'd give you a hug if I could.

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I hope you all can have wonderful holidays
be it alone, with your s/o ,or family
you guys are the best <3
-random mtf a lot of you helped this year

>>5434666

come over, i have champagne, jager, wine, maple whiskey, and rum... out of weed though, gotta get more of that...

why do you hate yourself more than usual? what's wrong?

>>5434749

you too...


>>5434737

this is the first time christmas hasn't been completely miserable for me in years... don't have to deal with my s/o's mom's crazy bullshit, i haven't had a decent christmas in 11 years

>>5434778
My fiancee and I mutually upset one another last night and her default reaction when I've upset her is avoidance mode.

When she does that without warning it reads like abandonment and I'm an insecure little shit, which was why we both got upset in the first place. It drives her up the wall to see me talk bad about myself so I'm anxious about how we're going to talk it out (which thankfully we're good at) when she feels better.

Also I'm getting my period for Christmas and I've got PMDD, so my brain is basically broken for a week or two beforehand. I would have preferred a beating from Krampus.

>>5434930
It's also an LDR so I can't do anything cheesy to cheer her up like buying her flowers or something.

>>5419128
Solid advice

>>5429117
....


How the fuck do you piss if your stuff is sewn shut?

>>5419128
>no beer
what a retarded advice

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You know, I kind of just realized we really don't have much going for us. Dicks and tits are far more lusted after. Who the fuck would want someone who literally has neither.

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>>5435029

>>5434981
i don't know, probably whatever they do with a normal meta since they don't reroute the urethra in those, do they?

>>5435029
that's at least a -150 privilege point
congrats you pass qualification for the affirmative space program by default

jokes aside strapons at least don't get soft when your partner counts on you the most. so there is that.

>>5435046
you piss out of your anus like birds

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>>5435029

>>5435057
yeah this can confirm

>>5434930

shit, sorry to hear that... relationship issues suck, at least you know you can talk it out though...

i can't deal with avoidance mode either desu, not cuz of the abandonment thing, it's more just that i hate things feeling unfinished and hanging over my head...

my ex (well technically my s/o and i were both with her) would talk down about herself a lot, and i hated it, but we never fought... it just made me really uncomfortable...

is it trans shit or just general insecurities?

getting your period now is a shit christmas present from life though...

>>5435051
I know you're fucking around, but I would rather have something desirable about my body than have tumblr points.

>>5435057

cloaca?


>>5435029

people lust after all kinds of shit...

>>5435051
>tfw strap ons make you dysphoric because theyre nothing like the real thing and remind you you'll never have a real dick

i just want to close my eyes and live in fantasy without dysphoria knocking on my door every five seconds

>>5435090
well sexual triggers are not that difficult and i believe for most woman the penis doesn't really do it.
broad muscular back will for example go a long way to get them bitches wet. also "strong jawline, thick neck, prominent brow, and deep-set eyes" supposedly. big hands are probably going to be a challenge unless you naturally have long fingers then you can work out with free weights to give it some substance.

>>5435097
well if you want to be a man then maybe learn how man the fuck up and please your woman.

there i times when i just want to be left alone but when duty calls men must answer.

>>5435029
I'm a top so I just care about butts.

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>>5435029
i was just watching a bunch of buck angel interviews last night and i never really realized how unappealing transmen are. to image him without a dick made him seem completely useless and disgusting.

>projecting

but this is why i'm afraid to transition medically

>>5435203
if all the vets who lost their dick in 'nam got a new one i'm sure eventually transfolk get to have a few extra penises.

>>5435203
>useless
To give Buck some credit he's good at taking the dick

>>5435218
just imagine:
>dead guys dick between your legs
>color match is not perfect
>rubber balls
>you can't even shoot blanks
damn this still sucks.

>>5435218
hope its before i'm old and decrepit

>>5435231
i'll take 2

>>5435203
I think he's unappealing with or without dick

My problem with ftm porn is that most of the time the guys are fucking ugly, I don't know why. It's not even the genital part, it's just that with or without dick, they're still fucking unappealing.

...To me, that is. Everyone has their tastes.

>>5435256
my problem with it it's disturbing as fuark.

>>5435087
>i hate things feeling unfinished and hanging over my head...
This too! Everyone just gets stuck feeling bad.
Like obviously a cool-off period is reasonable which is why I've just sent a check-in text and left it at that, but fuck, man.

>is it trans shit or just general insecurities?
Kinda both. Psychologically and behaviorally, I feel really bad about myself in a mostly genderless way. Normal raised-by-narcissist problems, honestly.

My bad body image is almost entirely dysphoria made worse by being overweight. I made the mistake of setting the standard a while back that talking bad about oneself can and should be challenged.

>>5435256
Yeah, it was hard to tell if he is just unappealing because of his squeaky voice, handlebar mustache and mr clean bald head or if its because someone so masculine looks wrong with a vagina.

someone like young dicaprio with a vagina doesn't bother me, i think everyone looks better with a penis though

>>5435203

buck angel is just kinda gross... even if he had a dick he'd still be gross

>>5435288

yeah, idk for me a cool off period is like an hour and then i'm good... or a cigarette, i don't get how people stay mad for days and need a lot of time to chill out...

maybe she'll feel like she should chill out soon just cuz of the holiday, people get like that...

my s/o's mom is a narcissist, so i've seen the kinda damage that shit can do firsthand, sorry you've gone through it... this is the first non contact christmas he's doing, and the 27th will make a year of him not speaking to her... though she's still managed to inject her bullshit anyway here and there it's been a relatively peaceful year...

are you still living with them or are you mostly away from that?

you've probably heard this before, but talking bad about yourself reinforces the ideas and just makes you feel shittier about yourself and less motivated... it's a really bad habit, and unfortunately a really hard one to stop too... and being overweight at the very least is something you can work on, like... if you just worked out (even just a little) every time you find yourself saying something shitty or thinking something shitty about your weight that would help your state of mind and help part of the issue you know?

I took interest in Buck Angel just long enough to find and watch his scenes with Allanah Star and then got over that whole thing so fast.

>>5435368
*Shrug* she texted me back like an hour ago so that's something.

And congrats to your SO on cutting loose. I'm still with my parents so I'm stuck with structured contact. (i.e. a lot of blank stares and pretending the dogs suddenly need a walk) No-contact is a goal, I just have to make sure my dog can get out with me.

>you've probably heard this before, but talking bad about yourself reinforces the ideas and just makes you feel shittier about yourself and less motivated

I believe it. I have a really hard time getting out of my own head and talking to people offline so it's hard to interrupt the process. I have an in-person support group but I haven't gone for like three weeks. I'm definitely going next monday.

I did manage to lose 2/3 of what I was aiming for. Stopped for a while because it plateaued and wasn't sustainable. I've been poking at it and making a little progress, it's just discouraging that it's not practically falling off like last time even though that's perfectly normal.

>>5435115
I'm a 3 on the kinsey scale, so I guess I'm fucked if I happen to fall in love with a guy then. :^)

What is the best type of chest binder to buy?

>>5435599

that's good at least, hopefully you get a chance to really talk...

he actually moved out with me when we were 19, but we were still living in brooklyn for a while... and then bad roommate situation and we both ended up living with his mom after (which was fucking awful) 'til she got pissed at us for visiting my family for easter, and kicked us out by throwing our stuff out into the yard in the snow for days while we were gone, calling us and telling us it'd been out there and we weren't allowed to come back... shit was crazy... then we moved back to brooklyn at one point after his grandma died in her old apartment, 'til his mom decided she wanted the apartment, started stalking the landlord and being crazy (she was convinced he was watching her, and she like taped garbage bags over all the windows and shit... we were there with his younger bro and sis, and basically taking care of them while his mom lived with her bf) and then just a lot of back and forth to be there for his siblings, and dealing with crazy shit...then christmas became about his mom getting progressively crazier and dramatic, and after last time it was just done

that's rough though, still being there... he had to fight to take his dog, even though his mom didn't want her and just abused her and shit... just cuz it bothered her that he cared about the dog and shit

2/3rds is good though, and anyway you can't just lose weight then stop doing everything you did you know? it's just gotta be part of your life, so like... disheartening or not you just gotta remember that it's something you want/need to do for yourself, and you'll get to where you want to be eventually... but you should feel good about your progress, that's an accomplishment even if it's not the end goal...

>>5435844
>>5435599

+

it is hard to not down yourself, i get it... i'm definitely not my biggest fan, but i have learned to mostly shut the fuck up about it... cuz then it's just lots of dwelling and piled on misery... mindfulness helps, meditation... when you learn to clear your head, and just experience every moment for what it is without thinking about what's gonna happen or everything that bothers you it gets easier to not do that to yourself... it's significantly easier said than done, and i've gotten way better at it but i'm far from great at it myself... even though i've come a long way from when i absolutely couldn't do that, and it really does make a huge difference... it doesn't fix everything, but perspective changes help a lot... there's a lot of shit that can't be controlled, but the way you see things and what you take from them can be when you put effort in...

>>5435830
GC2B

Anyone here read Sakana?

>>5435830
Definitely gc2b, DO NOT BUY UNDERWORKS, they are far more uncomfortable than gc2b and don't work nearly as well

>>5435956
I do. it's my favorite webcomic lately.

>>5434749
Happy holidays to you too anon, have a good time

>>5435962
Not the asker, but I heard cb2g or whatever binders get fucked up and wear out after a few months. I personally swore by Underworks tritops, but I also had surgery before the market exploded.

Underworks definitely aren't comfy, but the tritop sells well for a reason.

>>5436018
That's odd, I have an old gc2b that I've worn for 6 months and it's still in good condition. idk though, I'm no expert.

>>5436018
>>5436046
I'm personally kind of unhappy with gc2b. At the start it was even uncomfortable for me and it binds only as much as a sports bra. My tits aren't that big.
Still pissed nowadays.
Might just be me though.

>>5436112
nah I'm with you on that
It compresses more than my sports bra but ultimately is way less supportive. I *sleep* in it.

If I leave the house I wear a tri-top. I've been thinking of seeing if the new cotton-lined versions are any good.

Not sure if I hate women so much I don't want to be one or I am a trans guy...

Is the holidays hitting anyone else kind of hard depression wise? A lot of it reflects back to having to present as female with family still. Or just remembering my trans friends who made the permanent choice of leaving this earth around this time of year. Bad feels honestly senpai.. A part of me kind of has this feeling on the back of my neck that I'm going to end up the same way, just not knowing when and that really scares me.

>>5436122
>>5436112
does anyone have tips on how to keep the binder from rolling back up? already cut it once but it still does that shit.

>>5436176
Not sure. My GC2B has never rolled up, just rides up like a motherfucker and lets

I've heard of military stays (as in these http://www.amazon.com/Rothco-Y-Style-Military-Shirt-Stays/dp/B001KXHBJE ) being an option, but I've yet to meet anyone who actually uses them.

>>5436169
same

>>5435256
>>5435368
This. Buck is just gross regardless. It fucking sucks that he's the one who represents us for most people when they think of a ftm.

Wow I'm in love with someone who thinks I'm a cis male. How do I stop wanting to shoot my fucking brains out over not having a dick?

>>5436746
Looks aside, he's personality sucks too. He used to flip out on fetlife all the time when people were tired of him spamming his shitty, paid dating site and he had some other shitty pyramid scam about raising money for other people's surgeries. He's like the sleazy carsalemen of ftms.

>>5436875
>He's like the sleazy carsalemen of ftms

never heard something so accurate in my life

>>5436169

are you out to your family or are they just unaccepting?

sorry you've lost so many people around now... i get feeling like you'll end up that way, i'm sure i probably will at some point... not just cuz of trans shit, but my grandparents both had strokes (my grandpa was 85 when he had his, my grandma had several and ended up paralyzed when i was little), and then shit just went downhill after... dementia and shit

my mother took care of them, so i've seen just way too many shit things with old age and i'd never wanna end up like that... like they're the reason i believe in euthanasia, so even if it's just a matter of avoiding that... well you know...

i have a lot of health issues already i don't have tons of hope when it comes to old age lol

>>5436837

you might feel completely better if she's accepting when you tell her, and she might be...

>>5436875

i've actually only ever seen pics, never had a desire to watch him have sex + never thought about giving him much attention cuz i found him gross...

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kung fu panda fortune cookie

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>>5437897
+ kung fu panda fortune... gave my dog the cookie...

we decided chinese food + star wars should be today... so we can just get plastered starting from tonight 'til after new years...

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>tfw the chat you frequent starts discussing cunt boys and how boring they are

>>5437909
Rude. What they say?

>>5438066
They think I'm a cis male, so I can't really hold it against them. And they were literally just talking about how boring cunt boys are, just like >>5435029
said weirdly.

>>5437909
well, straight men aren't gonna like ftms
its too bad for ftms that girls don't have fetishes unless they're crazy

>>5438127
The majority of them are legit bisexual, and the couple of chicks were even saying it too. Hit me pretty hard, I can't deny it.

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Yesterday I told my dad about being trans. I though he was going to be angry o disappointed but instead he was very supportive and understanding. I just wanted to share the best X-mas gift I could have. Merry X-mas everyone

>>5438159
<3
Merry christmas, anon.

>>5438159
Merry Christmas one and all

Here's to trying our best to maintain decent relationships with family if possible, and ignoring tfw no penis by stuffing ourselves full of festive food and booze

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Happy Christmas, folks. May you eat and drink and do whatever the hell you like because it's Christmas, dammit.

>>5438105
I'm a cis gay guy and I like ftms. Both as people and as sex dolls. I might be the minority but we're out there.

I have a question. Is it normal to feel really fucking weird/embarrassed at the thought of packing at first? I want to get a packer but the thought's been giving me anxiety.
Even when I'm not open about being trans (like to coworkers and shit, I prefer to be stealth at work and out to irl friends), I feel like it's still pretty obvious I'm trans despite nearly 1 year on T.
It feels like if people notice, they'll think I'm pathetic, or be patronizing, or make it out like I'm a kid playing pretend dress-up. Like, "Oh, haha, yeah, that's totally a dick in there, I'm pretending it's not a piece of rubber shoved into your underwear so you can fool people and pretend you have something you don't." Much the same way people treat children when they make play-doh food and shit like that.
I'm willing to grit my teeth and get one if such strong feelings of shame and anxiety over it are par the course at the beginning. Just not sure if mine is an extreme case. I don't want to throw down a decent amount of money on this shit if it's just gonna turn out to be a terrible experience that I won't want to repeat.

>>5438557
You had a trial run with socks? I considered putting a sock packer together to see what it's like but I don't really know what the fuck I'm doing so I'm putting it off.

>>5438610
Yeah, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing either. I guess I probably should. I did it once in the past, and it made me feel better about myself, but that was in privacy. I've never had experience actually leaving the house with anything shoved down my pants.

>tfw binder is too small and killing my tits

>>5438159

that's great

+ happy xmas to you + them:

>>5438169
>>5438185
>>5438462


unrelated:

star wars was actually pretty good... the only star wars movie i actually liked before this was empire strikes back so yeah... return of the jedi was alright too

>>5438649
A sock is so unnoticeable that leaving the house with it would essentially be for your own comfort. Getting a small packer would give you a more shapely, visible package, but honestly, at the end of the day people really aren't staring at your crotch and looking for dick indentations as much as you think. Unless you're going to a gay bar or wear very tight pants, I'd consider packing a matter of your own comfort separate from passing.

Personally, I only pack when my dysphoria is bad, or if I'm wearing running tights. I know some people do it every day, but for me it seems like the hassle outweighs the benefits.

If you do decide to buy a packer, go for something small, and don't start with an expensive one. Having an eight inch multipurpose $300 dick seems awesome until you realize you're stuck with a massive boner that doubles as a piss funnel you don't want to use.

New thread for Christmas

>>5439802
>>5439802
>>5439802

>>5419128
>milk is still fine
milk is good for you is literally government propaganda that holds no truth in reality

>>5438557
i treat mine like a medical device.
it's a prosthetic that lessens my gender dsyphoria.