Archived threads in /lgbt/ - Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender - 215. page

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-A year later finally work up courage to tell mutual friend body feels wrong and maybe should have been a girl, but friend gets impatient, says she’s dealt with “enough identity crises lately”, turns out cool girl internet friend and guy rl friend are the same person. Feel incredibly betrayed and violated and throw gender feelings in a deep, dark place, but keep sleeping with him and never confront him because don’t want to be lonely.
-Fall in love with a girl but feelings aren’t returned.
-Talk constantly about not understanding why anybody would want to be a boy, being a boy is shit, I hate it. Don’t understand privilege or why this is a stupid thing to say yet.
-Start writing good girl names in journals, about wanting to be a mom, etc.
-Get computer and almost immediately seek out weird, upsetting porn. Pretty even mix of sexes. Pattern of masturbating and then collapsing emotionally continues. Fall into trap of identifying with women in images/movies, wishing body was like theirs, and that only makes it worse.
-Start pretending to be a girl online all the time, not sure why I want to do it and almost never doing sex stuff with it. Intense cognitive dissonance because other boys doing this hurt so much, but can’t stop.
-Suicide attempt. Doesn’t work. Family can’t afford more than two therapy sessions so nothing really comes of it.
-Diagnosed with ADHD and depression though.
-Fall in love with school’s only trans guy. Subconsciously use him as a field test, see if coming out and transitioning work for him or make him happy, and they don’t, so go even further back in closet. Doesn’t help he identifies as gay and only likes the boy parts.
-Junior year: Develop an eating disorder, restricting to 250 - 500 calories a day without really meaning to or understanding why. 5’6”, drop down from 160lbs to close to 100 within a couple months. Family is worried but won’t talk about it and we’re poor so no therapy.

(cont'd)

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-See self in mirror while on family vacation and realize look like a girl with long hair and skinny body. Cry about it and feel confused a lot, and don’t remember feeling horny about it.
-Get big into punk and emo music (it was 2004), seeing guys like Gerard Way as a kind of almost doable masculinity, can wear makeup/nail polish which is nice. Start self-medicating with weed/liquor/cigarettes a lot.
-Graduate with good grades/scholarships/grants and go to school even though family is poor. Major in writing and minor in women’s studies. Read S.C.U.M. Manifesto as part of second semester class and get fucked up over it. First two years see a succession of hookups and short, passionless relationships with an even mix of guys and girls. Incredibly high sex drive keeps sex happening even though it’s miserable, though bottoming is least upsetting way to do it.
-Year 3 get bored and go to spectrum meeting. Meet a couple of trans girls at the meeting who seem happy enough for stressed out undergrads, don’t necessarily pass but they’re pretty and nice and have a lot of friends.
-Realize being trans doesn’t have to make you miserable or lonely and you can transition and still be happy.
-Cry a lot.
-Come out to new trans friends, who are explicitly hesitant to encourage but supportive when needed and good friends in general.
-Not sure if want to transition but just happy to finally accept and understand this part of self, think of being trans as a kind of neurological intersex condition though never describe it that way out loud for fear of offending intersex person or getting side-eye from other feminists.
-Graduate. Move to a big city to try and transition, or at least feel out transitioning, far away from home and people who knew boy self, but have trouble moving psych med prescriptions over and without them everything is almost impossible. Crash and burn.

(cont'd)

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-Move home. Try and kill self again. Get job with friend of family at his body shop working with exclusively macho dudes, first real “guy” job ever. Miserable and bad.
-Eventually get job at cool punk rock/hipster bar where nobody bats an eye over long hair, nail polish, or some makeup. Use that pay and advances on some freelance projects to finally go to therapy.
-Therapist tells about trans support grou, but meeting the dysfunctional, unself-aware people there has the reverse effect of going to spectrum in college, feel doomed to misery and loneliness. But clock is ticking, and will kill self if not on HRT by 30th birthday.
-Therapy takes too long and resent being told what to do so self med for a little while without telling him. Quickly feel better, like a fog has been lifted and body is a part of self instead of separate thing. Quit again after like two months over health concerns.
-Eventually get diagnosed with Gender Identity Disorder.
-Doctor refers to an endo, get on correct doses of HRT under supervision and feel even better.
-Really obsessed with passing at first, wear breast inserts and full makeup everywhere, never talk so nobody hears voice, get job at call center as way to practice voice with constant feedback since can’t afford voice therapy.
-Don’t look at porn or feel compelled to masturbate and feel more comfortable and present when having sex, which is nice.
-Really stressed for a while because won’t ever be able to afford srs or ffs, and facial hair keeps growing back even after lots of sessions of laser, not to mention gaining weight again because psych finally got diagnosis right (bipolar) and meds do that.

(cont'd)

>>8660850
Why are anti-Jewish Nazis against Jews even when they aren't bankers?

>>8660854
terfs aren't feminine hormone haters, anon.
that analogy doesn't make sense.

>>8660850
because TERFism is not a coherent, rational world view, but reactionary fueled by fear

>>8660711
Fuck her in her boypussy, I guess.

I'd follow the scent markers of the ant in front of me until we reached our destination.

>>8660711
cry and ruin the moment but also be glad he didn't murder me...

I see no point in resenting them. I just bro around with them and occasionally make them feel awkward by talking about boy butts, anal, dicks, and how I could dom them.

>>8660526
It makes sense, you are jealous they were successful at something you failed to be (a man) and now you are going to try to be something you can't (a woman). Being butthurt is pretty expected from a failure.

>>8660592
/thread

>>8660376
that's racist

>>8660376
I love this but I'm white and a sub.

>>8660376
they are not worthy of it

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>>8660029
Good thing those faggots don't reproduce.
We should give them darwin awards.

>>8660040
in anticipation*

>>8660029

Is it time to lose the T from LGBT? I hate being grouped in with trannies and I've never met one that wasn't either incredibly manipulative or just full on hysterical.

>>8658142
AGP trash

They're not actually transgender, they just treat it as a fetish.

>>8658142
Yes, those hons would be far far better off if only they knew how to actually present as women. A big part of what makes one a hon is decades of male socialization.

>>8658150
It only takes a video or two- and there are serval about how to manage your hair and use proper makeup. even if you cant afford surgery you can learn how girls mastered hiding these things though clothes and hairstyles

can't think of one in greece, but rome had nero

alexander the great

>>8657919
Alexander the Great was a masculine, dominant top. Both men and women, very many of them both, were fucked silly by Alexander the Great.

>>8657310
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msGvEtmR970

>>8657310
I-it's beautiful.

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>>8657310
>toasting in clg bread

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How is everyone's day?

Just vaping myseld into oblivion.

Broken toe is looking better.

>someone cut my disgusting feet off. My legs and butt are nice for a chunky girl but my feet just ruin it

>>8656758
Feet look fine to me. Sucks about the toe though.

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>>8656777
It's mu fault, threw a kick wrong and didn't get the pad of my foot forward and my toes up in time. Was under a lot of pressure at the time because this Rottweiler came out of literally no where, no warning snarl, while I was in a yelling match with a dude who hadn't had any dogs last week.

Startled the fuck out of me.

That scuffle is why my forehead is scratched too.

>>8656388
Hong Kong.

>>8656388
He looks like a muscly ted Cruz lmfao

I was violently raped once when I was 11. Does that count?

>>8656204
yes

also still op but i was repeatedly abused sexually in this daycare when i was 4-5 so i wonder if shit in the op has anything to do with what happened there

idk shit sucks

>>8655974
Had sex in school. We got caught by students. Bj with my cousin's friend in my cousin's house.

I dunno.

Because many "trannies" (illegitimate) are AGP.

Case closed.

It's a well-paying job (transition is expensive) with a typically positive hiring/HR environment for transgenders. It's also a job where your mind is far more important than your outwards appearance, and has little to no interaction with clients/customers (depending on your role).

Also, tends to employ mainly well educated individuals who will tend to be less bigoted because of their experiences and intelligence. It helps that a lot of the jobs are also in California, which is one of the most accepting places to live for transgenders.

good post op

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>>8654275
It's way more fun when you ask her to stop and she says 'no', slaps you around, calls you names...

No one likes a cock tease. Don't start shit you can't finish.

>>8653528
>women
>watching porn

>>8653528
gay porn is made for cis men in the same way that lesbian porn is, duh?

>>8653539
>>8653547
I'm asking because someone accused me of being agp for not liking it.