ITT: we imitate the speech patterns of American youth
ay bae do you wanna come over and netflix and chill
UP DA DOO DIDDA PO MO GUB BIDDA BE DAT TUM MUHFUGEN BIX NOOD COF BIN DUB HO MUHFUGGA
It's gonna be great, something really special, you're gonna be so proud of what we built. Really great.
When Jason was at the table
I kept on seeing him look at me while he was with that other girl
Do you think he was just doing that to make me jealous?
Because he was totally texting me all night last night
And I don't know if it's a booty call or not
So... like what do you think?
Did you think that girl was pretty?
How did that girl even get in here?
Do you see her?
She's so short and that dress is so tacky
Who wears Cheetah?
It's not even summer, why does the DJ keep on playing "Summertime Sadness"?
After we go to the bathroom, can we go smoke a cigarette?
I really need one
Let me take a selfie
indeed finns truly have impeccable taste
>he actually is
The absolute madman.
>HEY DUDE, CHECK OUT DAT ASS!
>NO WAY DUDE, LOOK AT THAT DANK! SHE'S GOT SWAMP ASS!
>YEAH, BET IT SMELLS LIKE ASS IN THERE.
>YOU SAID IT, BRO. CHEAPASS HOES!
>BUT, LIKE, WHAT IF YOU'RE ONLY SAYIN DAT CAUSE YOU KNOW SHE'D TREAT YOU LIKE AN ASSWIPE?
>DUDE, DON'T MAKE AN ASS OF YOURSELF!
>NAH, JUST KIDDING BRAH, YOU KICK ASS!
>ALRIGHT, SO WHERE ARE WE GETTING THE CUPS FOR KRYSTYL'S HOUSE PARTY? SHE'S SUCH A TIGHTASS FOR MAKING US DRIVE DOWNTOWN TO GET THEM!
>SO ASSININE OF HER! BIATCH!
this is movie bullshit
here are actual phrases we say
>That party was lit
>hannah just cockblocked the shit out of me, what a bih (bitch)
>shut your bitch ass up
>After the party lauren was smelling like absolute ass
Because we are loud and social people
>mfw yuropoors autistic as fuck
you have a point, I'd probably do the same if I were American just to fit in. Sometimes I wish people were as sociable as Americans here because it seems like making friends would be much easier.
I would imitate the speech patterns of a Slovenian, but it's difficult to talk with a noose around one's neck.
>it seems like making friends would be much easier.
>implying the whole country is shitifornia
You're triggering me desu senpai
I can't argue against that. There's too many obese fucks here. It's not even funny anyone, because I actually love my country.
>mfw I've had to consider the obesity rate of my destination for the last 2 moves I've made
>mfw the sheer number of hopelessly fat fucks in the Midwest and south actually triggers me
The valley girl accent is really fucking unbearable to listen to. It's the worst when women cling onto it in their 30s and forties. I can't see them as anything but oversized children.
Calm down, Cletus, maybe somebody will notice you or even pretend to care.
Feels good living in the only part of America that matters.
As beautiful as I think the natural parts of California are, I think the people are the worst. You're Texas-tier stuck up your own asses. You're really on another planet, you fucking weirdos.
I live on the best coast, the one opposite of the spic-filled noguns libtard land you dwell in
Enjoy paying $10 for a bottle of water, fucking retarded norcal wetback
Shouldn't you be attending your mandatory BLM protest right now?
>mfw people don't respect public lands
Wow, because that's so much better. It's all the same disgusting swamp with terrible weather and terrible people when viewed from the only good state in America (California). Enjoy your walmart fat scooters and redneck retards, buddy.
Not really. Most of us aren't something on the inside that we're not on the inside. Quit trying to make us more complex/interesting/insidious than we really are. We're mostly just dumb, boring, and contented fat fucks. Those that aren't are the people getting shit done, and they're usually psychotic on the outside.
Yes, California climate and weather is amazing, especially when you take into consideration the commercial farmers turning your desert into even more desert, and the less than 50% white population leaving trash everywhere.
>calling other states stupid
toppest kek coming from the state that made fucking Schwarzenegger governor
CA is the birthplace of American spics and modern nigger culture (Compton, NWA). Not to mention the few whites left are the biggest socialist retards on earth. There's more fat idiots in CA than even Missouri. CA is also home to Hollywood kikes, Silicon Valley kikes, porn industry kikes, fags and idiot celebrities.
You're basically everything wrong with this country
When the wall goes up, you'll be on the other side you delusional faggot
Woah, yikes, alright man. This got pretty weird.
So then I was like yea like whatever you know so like then he's like dude that's like totally not true so them im like i could care less you know like i would of like said anything
yea cool let's go to the starbucks and get some proper coffee cool
w-where do you get those rankings :3
Like holy shit bro do you see that? That guys car has got THREE pedals! Thats some next level shit bro, I bet he can go THREE TIMES as fast as a normal car! And that weird thing in the middle where the drive stick usually is? You can move it around and shit, its crazy.
To which I would say
>you have fun with Chad, toothpick. I'll be having a great time with my girl
I was waiting for you to say that, in fact I was expecting that exact type of response.
She's not even really fat, just doughy, which I don't fuck'n mind, those bitches are soft as fuck. She's got pretty hair, amazing tits and a great ass