I don't want to meddle in other countries' affairs.

My vodka addiction is worrying, I should cut back.

That's enough squatting for one day

Winter War

I'm working too much.

i'm hiv negative

>>30879056
Im older than 55.

Apologies my good sir. I am just a foreign tourist, like you, and accidentally bumped into you while I was admiring the view of these wonderful fountains and parks.

>>30879056
No, I already showered today.

I'll get rid of all Western products in my home in support of my country's industry.

No thanks, I'm not a drug user.

I love Jews (this is a positive)

>>30879056
No thanks, I have had enough vodka for one day.

I won't do that, it sounds dangerous.

Ew dude that's my sister!

I'm really ashamed at how we raped Poles for centuries

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>>30879056
It sure is nice to be surrounded by so many friendly countries!

Finns won Winter and Continuation War.

I could not possible have sex with this women, she is far too loose.

Gorbachev did nothing wrong.

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Upon reflection of recent events in Ukraine, I disagree with my government's actions regarding the annexation of that country's sovereign territory and its support of the separatists. Moreover, I don't believe Putin is a good leader because the isolation of Russia from the international community will harm our economy.

I am not an alcoholic

I am sorry for everything, Balts, we will look to bring every Russian out of there so you can live in peace. :3

I'm human

The CIA didn't do it. It might have been my nations fault.

Adidas? Oh, no thanks, I can't stand their branded sports clothing.

>>30879056
I dont mess with drugs, man

I admire the impartiality of the BBC, it is a welcome alternative to the biased domestic news services available in my corrupted homeland, Russia.

Today I openly displayed that I am a homosexual.

>>30879617
Things a Brit will never say:

>I'm proud of my history and heritage
>I wish I didn't suck so much Banker cock
>maybe a Finance-based economy isn't the best idea
>multicult is worst cult
>please, no more immigration

Finland's a good place, actually far better than Russia at everything.

>>30879914
Japland, pls
UKIP is getting stronger by the day

My country is so small and irrelevant

I'm good at math.

>>30879969
lol wut?
>an american education

I'm going to take a shower.

>>30879948
It's a butthurt American ex-pat not a Jap. I recognise that guy's posts, he's obsessed with Britain and Brits, really hates us

Russia Today is biased and subjective media outlet.

>>30880013
>Russia Today is biased and subjective media outlet.
Yes it is. As almost all world media unfortunately.

>>30879969
>reputation for having the worlds best hackers and programmers
>not good at math

what?

>>30879999
>>30880046
>being this insecure

I think we should give Crimea back to Ukraine

i'm not good at chess

>>30880062
We are surprised cause it doesn't fit to this thread, cause it's true.

>>30880086
It's only a true statement in this thread.

>>30880062
it doesn't fit the thread fag

>>30880180
Yes it does Ivan


stay butthurted

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I look forward to a long-lived healthy life, unaffected by excess alcohol consumption and HIV AIDS, and a generous government pension fund which hasn't been given to Rosneft because sanctions are denying my country's most important companies the ability to finance themselves.

>>30880215
It doesn't.

>>30879056
no i wasnt drinking and driving, now come one put me in jail for trying to bribe you, officer.

None of my sisters are prostitutes.

>>30880253
>I cannot into mathematics
>I must rely on Germans and Jews to progress my space program

>>30879538
That's what finns will neve say too.

I think people should know how to drive before getting a drivers licence

Our women don't turn into babushkas after age 30

>>30880003
Most Americans are. It's worrying.

>>30880354
No they're not m8, you needn't worry.

>>30880299
>no american will ever see this as ironic

That woman is wearing far too much make-up for my tastes

>>30880385

I live in Von Brauns (american) home town.

>>30880456
>living in shitsville

>>30880499

Compared to the rest of Alabama, it's a fucking oasis of learning and culture.

>>30880003
Lol you're right, I'm American. However, I'm not whatever guy you're referencing. I either joke the French for having a Frankenstein language, post in Spanish, or talk history.
How was today's curry ration?

Thread successfully derailed

I have an IQ score over 100.

>>30880623
You sure have.

>>30880656
Fuck english, you sure haven't

>>30880656
>>30880688
Don't prove him right comrade

Сука Блять ))))))))))))))))))))))

>>30881078
CYKA

I successfully completed a sentence in English or any other foreign language, with no missing or redundant words. Moreover, I didn't use a funny word order that made me sound like Yoda. Some of the stereotypes about Russia might have a piece of truth to them and while caricaturesque and exaggerated, they are basically correct if not completely accurate.

damn, my ankles hurt.

maybe I should just use a chair.

I should limit my drinking.

>>30881110
You got me :) I love you all dear Russians

>>30881111
kek

Nice quads

Snowden and Farage are bad people.

the vodka and potatoes are too cheap hail putin x))))))

<3 yeltstien

I hate Putin(in public)

i love gays

i'm catholic

i'm protestant

communism was great

yeltsin was great

why can't we be more like America?

I AM not RUSSIAN

LOL is how it works???

I support reasonable, forward-thinking, politicians who are respectful of the democratic process and abhor corruption.

>>30880299
The irony. Our space program, and weaponized rockets ect got off the ground because of germans and jews

Doesn't matter though cause we're a melting pot and we make delicious America soup

>>30881292
>I hate Putin(in public)
We just recenlty have like 50 thousands in Moscow marching in the center and shouting that they hate Putin, so read less of your free press, lol.
>i'm catholic
>i'm protestant
We have like several millions of them
>communism was great
Millions would say and saying that
>yeltsin was great
No one would say this about this fucker.
>why can't we be more like America?
We already have macdonalds and burger king.

>>30881328
neat

I don't drink

Rape is wrong.

>>30881328
flag added

>>30881388
No shit? Thanks for pointing that out captain obvious.

>>30879056
"Sorry"

>>30881388
>jews
They're also the reason the Soviets got nukes.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julius_and_Ethel_Rosenberg

>>30879176
>>30879139
>>30879176
>>30879629
>>30879889
>>30880002
>>30880282
>>30881356
>>30881491
>>30881465
good

>>30881491
No.
Rape culture is what makes man.
If you worship women you will become a sissy.

Alcoholism is a problem

>>30881417
>We already have macdonalds and burger king.
We already have burger king.

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>>30880282

>>30879056
I destroyed MH-17

I have a driver's license.

i like Chechens

i don't drink alcohol

>>30882341
That's for those who can't drive stupid. Coz those who can can easily get away from police chase/

>>30879056
oh sure, let me just pay with my visa credit card

>>30882872
>credit
Yes, it fits then.

Gorbachev was not an idiot
Glasnost might have worked
China can be trusted
Friendship doesn't need money
That was wrong, we should not have done it

>>30879056
>If you criticize Russia you are not a fascist
>My wife never had an abortion

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A dashboard camera? No thanks.

>>30883024
>Gorbachev was not an idiot
miss
>Glasnost might have worked
miss
>China can be trusted
fits
>Friendship doesn't need money
miss

>>30883478
>Gorbachev was not an idiot
>miss
I raped your mom, kreakl.

>>30883576
Was Hitler an idiot? No.
Same works for Gorbachev. More like he is bastard.

>Belarus & Kazakhstan are not satellite states of glorious Rosja

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90's was a very prosperous period for Russia

I don't know what "Orthodoxy" is

I've never had kvass

There was never any smoking in the office

What is "soyuzmultfilm"?

No one in my family likes fish

We bought a dog instead of a pig and never feed it beer

My mother doesn't want a Mercedes

>>30879056
Our economy will improve with greater integration into Europe.

>>30879243


based german humor, i love you guys

I'm so scared of Ukraine and the mighty european military

>>30885501
He's wrong you know

my grandfather died in his 60s after suffering 2 strokes and being completely paralyzed for a year

and my grandmother got cancer in her 60s

but is still alive because that woman is amazing and would have to get cancer twice to die

[spoiler]>tfw both grandfathers dead :([/spoiler]

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I'm so happy living in Russia.

I think there should be more Polish Jesuits in my country

>>30879056
I like freedom

I wonder if the Eastern Rebels are supported by Russia?

Actually Russians are pretty good at math. During the 1980's the joke among American Math PHDs was that the Russians already discovered your thesis.

"We don't have a right to invade our neighbors"

>>30879056
I agree friends, history shows that we have mingled with our current fellow compatriots of Asiatic features and foreign worship. It is known that through Russian history, we have ventured north, assimilated the Finnic dispersed tribes, into SIberian and Kazan khanates, the Kazakh state and the Far East, looking for gold and timber, but finding appealing Asiatic women for our muzhnik pleasures. I accept that we are not fully Slavic and that we do not bear the absolute image of the Slavic people.

Churkas are nice people and productive members of society, and everybody loves having them around.

>>30879682
>Kuwait

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>>30885173
> I've never had kvass
> No one in my family likes fish
I fucking hate both fish and kvass.

>>30885173
>We bought a dog instead of a pig and never feed it beer
Wut?
Everything else is correct.
Btw I fed my female friend's dog with bread with vodka, kek. It liked it, wanted more.

>>30879243
Top kek.

Whoops! I seem to have misplaced my dash cam. Though insurance fraud is very low, and the chances of accidents happening are minimal I don't need one anyways!

Off to my pride parade!

>>30893638
Actually people buy dashcams to film lulz and post them on youtube nowadays. Even i installed chinese GoPro-clone as dashcam just for filming purposes

>>30879056
>ITT: Thins an American would never say.

I'm 60 and happy

I avoid cursing when not needed and i have alot of finesse in general.

>>30886873
I think you won.

In a online game, on team chat:

"We should speak english"

Harming people just isn't in my nature
That car is unlocked. I better notify the owner, and make sure nothing is stolen

>>30894833
Thats haram

>>30894949
Okay Jamal, when you gonna leave Russia?

>>30879056
That's exactly what a russian would say, as russians are all liars.

>>30895078

Leave him alone. If he was born in Russia, he is Russian

>>30879243
*shakes head* Actually Russia does have a quite old population - slightly more than half of all Russians are over 50. There are also two particular age groups with abnormally low numbers - these are people in their 60s-early 70s because of the low birth rate of the WWII period and teens-early 20s because the Yeltsin years also had very low birthrates.

Ja pierdole kurwa

>>30879056
They will rarely admit any Polish / Ukrainian ancestry.

>>30895812
*nods respectfully towards you*

>>30879056
We truly apologise for 300 years of Imperialism and promise to change. We will shift the focus of our nation from expansion to civilisation building and surpass Japanese work efficiency and French sophistication to become the nation everybody in the world loves and looks up to.

Oh, a bear, lets run away, it may hurt us!

Stalin was a faggot.

Of course I can give you some gas, my ukranian friend.

>>30879056
Russia's borders are perfect.

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>>30901443
God, how I wish this was the truth. All that land, all those resources, all that manpower...

>>30879210
>>30879609
>>30879682
>>30879969
>>30880282
>>30880623
>>30885768
Lold

>>30879056
We shouldn't have attacked Finland ,and we should return the stolen territory

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>90% of the thread are outright insults based on stereotypes

reminder bulgarians are turks and therefore non white

>>30879056
gg wp

>>30879176
underrated post

>>30903384
Where do you think you are?

>>30881328
Hello proxy. I see you are enjoying your stay on internet. Good.

>>30883693
he ended gommunism which makes him the greatest person in the history of everything

I'm aware of where Finnish, Estonian and Swedish airspace ends and where the international one begins.

"I love black people"

even though it's my holiday i should still be respectful to the staff, they are people to and only doing their job after all

Actually yeah, now that I think of it, injecting krokodil does seem like a bad idea

I think we should atone for the rapes our soldiers committed in Eastern Europe and Germany during WW2.

Wow, our standard of living is really bad compared to western europe and other western countries so I might stop being such a fucking arrogant bitch and finally admit it.

Rape is not okay.

The holodomor was a horrible thing.

Men and women should have equal rights.

these people have valid, logical reasons to be skeptical of Russia and they certainly aren't because they are buthurt fascists

The Crimean vote was illegitimate because of our intervention.

>>30904111
>implying russians think so
only retarded hohols want to classify it as ukranian genocide

>>30904111
Also:
Holodomor was our fault.

"I think we need more fags to increase diversity in this country."

>>30904235
>reading comprehension

>>30904235
Nigga you just proved his point.

There is no legitimate justification for Stalin's crimes.

Maybe I should act respectfully towards people when visiting their country

Hohols are clearly superior to Russians and have a right to their lands without interference from us

Tracksuits are lame.

I will never marry with an american/european for the citizenship

>>30904278
>>30904292
i'm a bit dyslexic no bully pls

>>30904251
"The Ukrainians didn't genocided themselves".

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>>30903384

>>30879449
I certainly hope you guys put tanks on the baltics border

>>30904372
>Stalin killed people who didn't deserve it

I'm sober.

>>30881643
/thread

>>30879969
?????????????????????????????????????????????

>tfw I'm actually starting to feel bad for Russians for the constant bantz they've been getting lately

I'm not entirely convinced that my government is telling me the truth.

>>30879056
>>30904746

"I feel bad for people in other countries"

>>30904746
homoneekeri :DDDDDDD

>>30903384
Welcome.

Nice sun. Another opportunity to live a great day!

I've never thought a thread on chinese imageboard can make me feel so bad. Russians really are aggressive, deluded, narrow-minded, self-abandoned, hateful muppets in the hands of its own war-oriented corrupted government. The worst part is that it's all about the people, not the economy, not the shitty geopolitic citation, not the climate, not us been stupid, it's about as enjoying being such jerks.
It's not like I haven't noticed this before, but been remained so suddenly of how bad we have it and how there's no escape for me gives me a sick feeling.
We shouldn't have threads like this.

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>>30905882
W-we don't really mean it.
It's just bants.

Poland strong:D)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

>>30879056
Wherever I go, I must also not rape

>>30905882

Don't let the western anti-russia propaganda get to you, m8. It's not like these jerks have it any better in their countries.

our tanks will be in Paris in 7 days. in London in 10 days. in Washington in 14 days. In Berlin in 5 days.

I don't own a single tracksuit

Putin is not the saviour of mankind and I would not suck his dick if he offered.

>>30906201
>Things a Russian would never say
So, your tanks wouldn't actually even reach those cities?

>>30879056

Maybe I should quit drinking so much.

Please

>>30903384
>what is /int/?

>>30906340
>tanks cross border into Poland
>get droned

>>30906504
T-thanks Amerikka, you're truly our greatest ally.

>>30885768
Well, I am happy living here.

We shouldn't bother these people because they're next to us.

>>30905882
Wherever you are, leave the proxy and show your true flag faggot

>>30906340
We can capture Washington in 48 hours (from the Mexican border). But we're not talking about it. It's a secret

>>30906201
>in Washington in 14 days
How?
Our navy and air force are better than yours.
Try to do it by water and they're at the bottom of the ocean. Try to do it by air and they're shot out of the sky.

Raping this woman would be an immoral thing to do

>>30906941
>Try to do it by air and they're shot out of the sky.
9/11

>>30906941
>from the Mexican border)
Because Mexico is our bro.

>Company of Heroes 2 is great game!

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>>30907056
>Because Mexico is our bro.

>>30907007
>implying the usa hasn't improved their air forces after 9/11

>>30906838
>missing this chance to write "and show your true colors"

>>30907109
>implying they're not

>>30907109
yeah syka! You must pay the price for your arrogance.

>>30907118
>no fun allowed

>>30907172
fuck yeah! together we are invincible.!

>>30907195
that was shitty banter, sorry

>>30907178
I love you bro

>>30907007
Hijacking a passenger plane and moving an armada over the Pacific Ocean are two quite different things, my brown friend.

>>30907172
Cool, now back to bottling Coca Cola.
>>30907178
>russians try to invade through Mexico
>cartels behead them all

>>30907232
Ok
>>30907259
I wouldn't have realised that if you hadn't told me, thanks.

>>30907243
But I do not love you. but you can be the guards in the concentration camps, where we'll put all amerifats

I love my country.

>>30905882
You deserve having to read every single one of these threads.

I've never had man-on-man sex while I was in the army.

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>>30903384

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>>30879056
Let's put this rug on the ground.

>>30906137
I'm not saying my country is a beacon of enlightenment and FREEDUMB :DDDD (see: PATRIOT Act, Iraq War, enhanced interrogation aka fucking torture, warrant-less wiretapping, etc the list goes on).

But in the US of A I can repeatedly criticize the government without getting murdered, have an election that isn't smoke and mirrors run by one man, and run a corporation with no fear that the government will steal it and imprison me. We're not perfect, far fucking from it, but to say that Russia and any Western democracy are the same is edgy bullshit. No offense

What's caviar?

Hitler was kind of cool.

The USA tell the truth constantly and have a working democratic government.

I don't drink.

I love all non-russian citizens of my country.

We do care about the sanctions.

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>>30903384
>>30907483

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>>30907790

>have an election that isn't smoke and mirrors

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>>30907790

This doubles as a things Americans would never say thread.

>>30903384
>insults
your existence is an insult to us all

> ITT Russia in charge of taken the bantz
bawwwwww

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>I'll get the wards and courier!

>>30880585
you're embarrassing both japan and america at the same time

how does it feel

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>>30907896

>muh fredom
>Russia > USA

Some people...

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>>30881111

>>30879056
it's ok you can go mid if you want

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>this entire fucking thread

>>30885768
BTFO by Congo.

>>30903384
Welcome to the /int/ Web Brigades. Enjoy your stay.

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>>30879056
CYKA CYKA
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

I'm going to be good at Dota.

I get well paid for spreading Russian propaganda on 4chan!

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my team already has a mid and carry players, so I'm gonna play support

It is not our clay so we should let them have it

>>30907082
>things that disagree with my personal world view aren't fascist propaganda

>>30879243
>>30907527

germoney, yuo are most funniest

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>>30907527

>>30879210
>>30879368
>>30879609
>>30879682
>>30880282
>>30904435
>>30906716
maximum keks achieved

>>30911425
Is freedom and instrument

>Rule of law is more important than having an extra mercedes
>A guy tried to bribe me the other day, I of course refused indignantly and reported him to the authorities
>Ukraine should be free to determine its own fate without our intervention
>Americans are not actually out to get us
>Balts and Poles are actually pretty cool
>Stalin was an evil man and Russia without communism would have been much better place.

Let's not get drunk and do unsecured chin ups on a rusty old crane 80 metres in the air today.

I recognize the irony in calling other nations fascists.

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>>30895078
>jamal