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Jeanne D'arc

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Thread replies: 72
Thread images: 17

>Was born a peasant.
>Left her parent's home when teenager.
>Meet the King in person and told him to get his shit together.
>Lead her army into battle, obtaining key victories that eventually won the war.
>Being faced with the ecclesiastic judges, managed to outsmart a bunch of sell out academics.
>Managed to avoid rape, and eventually be recognized as martyr.

All this before her 19. What have you accomplished, anon?

>History waifu
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>>30892
Sad thing she was killed by her own country after all she did.
>>
>>30892
>>Managed to avoid rape, and eventually be recognized as martyr.

but she was raped anon
>>
i wish i could talk to her and learn more of her schizophrenia trouble
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>raped at a young age by her father who was a wealthy noble of Rome
>conspires to murder him with her mother and brothers
>kills him with a hammer

I just think she's so pretty. Women in historical paintings aren't usually depicted well, but she was in this one. I think it might have been an artists depiction painted some time in the 19th century but I'm not sure.
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>>31501
>Duchy of Burgundy is France
>>
>>31501
>>31510
>>31714
>>31792

Where do you people even get this utter bullshit?
>>
>>32057
>19 year old captured peasant girl
>responsible for the deaths of her captors friends
>in the 1300s

She probably got raped.
>>
>>32057

Not sure I understand the question. Are you questioning the validity of the story? You can read all about it here

http://www.lrb.co.uk/v20/n13/charles-nicholl/screaming-in-the-castle-the-case-of-beatrice-cenci

AFAIK they weren't sure who actually committed the murder, whether it was one of her brothers, her, or her mother, but she was integral in plotting the murder.
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>>32057
He wasn't talking about Joan but about his personnal history waifu as op mentioned.
>>
>>32156
The exact transcripts of her trials are known in full. Her fear of being raped was a repeated subject and her reason for wearing male clothing, which was in the end the main thing she got convicted for. You can bet that if she had actually been raped it would have come up.

Also it's the 1400s.

>>32218
Never mind I thought you were talking about Joan of Arc.
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>>32343
Yeah, typo.

>she didn't get raped because they don't mention it!

In context to the times, she was likely raped.
>>
>>32343
>>32156
Actually, in some transcription from her trials she mentioned a general, or guard or someone else entering into her jail and trying to get his way with her by force.

And somehow, a peasant 19 years girl managed to kick him out of her cell with her virginity still intact.

Also, at least one noblewoman certified her pureness.
>>
>>32417
She would have very obviously mentioned it.

>>32422
Exactly.

>And somehow, a peasant 19 years girl managed to kick him out of her cell with her virginity still intact.
Are you implying it's unlikely? Defending against rape from a single guy isn't that hard for a woman who's accustomed to some physical exercise, a kick in the balls usually does it.
>>
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>Anons are getting visibly upset that Joan of Arc was not raped
>>
>>32485
>they would have taken her word
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>>30892
>What have you accomplished, anon?
I masturbated. Beat that Joan!
>>
>>32550
she could've jeanne'd my arc if you get my drift
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>>32655
>be imprisoned
>nothing to do
>implying she didn't
>>
>>32485
My english isn't good.

Yeah, I think it sounds surprising. We're talking about a young girl with barely any martial training against a trained soldier. The former with no weapons or protection other than her clothes, and the later with access to any and all kind of arms and subordinates or companions.

She still managed to kick him out of her cell.

If I were a soldier, that would be quite humiliating.
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>>31714
Nothing schizophrenic about the Heavenly Voices commanding you to enthrone the dauphin and save France from the English barbarians senpai.
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>history waifu

Sweet communist, the communist daughter
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>>32591
There's a transcript you dumbass. Everything she said at the trial is recorded.
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>>32681
>implying a pure 14th century Christian would do something like that

Is this /his/ or /degeneracy/?
>>
>>32731
Her diary gave me a hardon desu
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>>32762
Hormones beat purity every time.
>>
>>32681
rule 34 when?
>>
Was Joan really a beautiful maiden or was she more of a tall and unattractive village brute?
>>
>>32681
>>32785
That's when God sends an angel to lend a hand.
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>>32947
>when girls wanna get off God sends angels
>when guys do, they get fucking rekt
Onan is a poor sonuvabitch
>>
>>32785
I think an earnest fear of imminently burning in the blackest depths of hell, taunted by devils, could override hormones.
Anyone here an expert on 14th-c sexuality in a Christian context?
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>>32156
Real history isn't anything like Game of Thrones, m8
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>>32947
Considering she probably had absolutely no idea about sexuality, let alone masturbation (what's a clitoris etc), an angel might've done a better job, yeah.
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>>32757
Yeah, I'm aware there is a transcript.

You don't suppose that...I dunno, someone maybe...and this is craxy, so bear with me...someone maybe said something that wasn't recorded?

Maybe someone said something that would reflect poorly on the captors, such as raping a 19 year old prisoner?
>>
Is raping Joan of Arc the first meme on /his/?
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>>33198
He rapes his captive, Joan
>>
>>30892
Jeanne D'Arc was not a peasant. Though not nobility, she was from a wealthy family.
>>
>>33131
There are plenty of things in the transcript that reflect poorly on the captors. And on the judges. If you read the transcripts you know she completely recks their shit.

Trials are public, you can't just rewrite the transcript.
>>
>>33434
Sure you can. Just bribe the right people, and kill the others who won't go along with the bribe. This was the middle ages, it wasn't that hard,

Just accept that having Joan as your history waifu makes you a kek. Thus, you're a kek.
>>
>>33740
Yes there's a conspiracy of the entire city of Rouen held up by mass murders in order to hide that Joan of Arc was raped, but for some reason not hide that she was subject to attempted rape, or that she rekt her judges in several arguments.

Please stick to fapping to your Chinese cartoons.
>>
>>33894
All you have to do is cover up the murders and history will think it never happened.
>>
>>32156
>1300s
>raping important prisoners

>>32689
imho he tried it on her but when he met with defiance he decided it's not worth it.
>>
>>32891
Based on what I have read so far, she was a short woman, with a short neck and short black raven hair. However, she was quite strong and skilled in martial topics (like riding and using a lance), and quite often soldiers would feel intimidated by her presence. Either because she was a butch, or because she was a superior, is hard to tell.

However, she had blue eyes, was slim as she eat little, and given her religious views, quite often would not eat anything, but some bread and wine.

Also, several sources cite her as a feminine, vigorous and strong willed girl.

Pic related is the closest to a realistic depiction of her.
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>>32782
Real talk I jerked off her descriptions of her vagina when I was like 13
>>
Reminder that her execution was completely political because the English were starting to lose the favor of their people.
Executing someone from the enemy side as a heretic helped demonstrate that God was on their side in this war.

And then Agincourt happened, which REALLY cemented that in.
Shame the English couldn't clinch victory, probably wouldn't have had the Wars of the Roses after that if they had won.
>>
Man if you wanna talk historical Best Girl I'm gonna point you at France a little bit later.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julie_d%27Aubigny
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>>34970
The Hundred Years War was the English winning over and over, but the asspained French kept starting wars, and eventually they won the final one. It's like a human wave tactic, eventually it will work.

Fucking frogs.
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>>34970
Agincourt happened in 1415, Joan died in 1431
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>>35088
Whoops, fuck me I guess
Well, my point still stands
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>>34979
>In order to run away with her new love, she stole the body of a dead nun, placed it in the bed of her lover, and set the room on fire to cover their escape.
That's, uh, a bit of an overkill maybe?
>>
>>35047
One of the main reasons the French won was because they started to avoid pitched battles which then drained the English economy.
>>
>>33074
Rape was easier to get away with back in those days, back then there was an actual patriarchy in play
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>>35161
Not of a high value political prisoner.
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>>35047
That's completely and utterly wrong.

First the war wasn't between France and England, it was between two French noble houses (Valois and Anjou) which both claimed to be heirs to the French throne, one of which (the Angevins) just happened to also own England.

The Angevins were the ones who started the war since the Valois had the throne de facto. Nothing much happened for the first 20 years of the war. Then the Angevins had a great victory in 1356 where they captured the Valois king John II, and which led to an uprising in Paris and Burgundy taking the Angevin side. John's son Charles V then won a series of victories between 1360 and 1380 and reconquered all of France save for a small strip in Aquitaine. This lasted until the 1420s, when his son Charles VI had gone mad and France had fallen into civil war chaos again with the Armagnac and Burgundy factions warring, and Burgundy helping the Angevins make use of the situation and invade again. The Angevins conquered the Northern half of France, until 1429 when Joan of Arc appears and turns it all around by 1432.
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>>35047

>The Hundred Years War was the English winning over and over
People always forget about Charles V.
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>>35265
Basically:

1335 - 1346: nothing much happening
1346 - 1360: Angevins ("England") winning
1360 - 1415: Valois ("France") winning
1415 - 1429: Angevins winning
1429 - 1453: Valois winning
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>was born a servant
>became a queen
>would do anything for her dream

Why aren't you achieving your dreams, /his/?
>>
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More historical waifus-- Jane Grey

Would have saved England from philistinism, but Elizacrook murdered her.
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>>30892
>Lead her army into battle, obtaining key victories that eventually won the war.
Not true, she was just a flagbearer and a moral boost since the visions made the army believe god was on their side. The real attribute of victory was from the remodeling of the French army
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>>36608

>Began a decades long infighting between her descendants and that of her rival.

Fuck Yeah!
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>>30892
>all those modern books and documentaries calling her a "farm girl with schizophrenia"
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>>30892
Witches are not people.
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>>30892
The original Mount and blade.
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>>35088
Age of empires 2 lied to me!
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>>34882
>Based on what I have read so far, she was a short woman

was this written by an Englishmen? I've noticed every famous French leader/warrior are always made short by the English like Napoleon

in his paintings Napoleon is a tall to normal size soldier but according to the English they call him short to make fun of him
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>>37669
Napoleon is normal sized. For a Frenchman.
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Here's a thought: witches don't exist.
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She just wanted to defend her country
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>Being such a historical badass that Square Enix puts you in a game as a top-tier card
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>>38703
>Being such a historical badass that TYPE-MOON puts you in a game as a Ruler-class Servant
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>>38962
[unchristian thoughts intensify]
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>>37903
bullshit
i was married to one
Thread posts: 72
Thread images: 17


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