Is there a reliable way to completely block smart phone

god i hope you're hiro

>>61982296
Destroy all the smart phones in the world.

>>61982296
>my web site
Fuck off nobody actually want to use your shitty site

>>61982296
xDDD totally this gnu/bro everyone should totally be using $20 thinkpoor with linux on it

>my site is too good to allow smartphone PLEBS from accessing it
>i don't want users
>i enjoy self-sabotage and being a failure
>here's a picture of the most meek, boring and forgettable character from all of star trek because he represents everything i am in real life

/g/s final form right here

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>>61982352
now look at this passive aggressive cunt.
balls just tucked or did you get rid of them completely?

No, you need to rely on the information the browser gives your server to identify a smartphone user and that can always be faked.

>>61982362
why do you think that its self sabotage to not want idiots in your site?

>>61982439
my guess is that the ones who know enough about computers to fake the browser agent are probably not the problem for the OP and the majority does not know how to do that.

>>61982362
>Projecting this hard

>>61982296
Not realistically, no. But you can prevent 95% of them from accessing the site by "offering" a mobile version of your site that is completely dysfunctional and broken. People clever enough to request the desktop version of a site are relatively rare.

>>61982362
>O'brien
>forgettable
He's not though.
You on the other hand...

>>61982544
>People clever enough to request the desktop version of a site are relatively rare.
They're also your target audience because they're not dumb normies

>>61982308
Who?

>>61982296
There are two approaches:
1. Block based on user agent.
-> Easily circumventable.
2. Block based on IP
-> Doesn't block people using their smartphone at home, but people using their laptop via tethering.

No.

>>61982694
chinkmoot

detect screen resolution and block smartphones

>>61982885
Smartphones are pretty high-res these days.
You just end up blocking people like me who like to keep their browser window small.

>>61982534
You cant do it on android or iOS anyways iirc, so its a moot point
The one person running plasma or similar wont be on your site likely

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>>61982296
Why, did you get butt blasted by a phone user?
You sound salty af

>>61982909
block screens where the height is bigger than the width

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>>61982917
you sound like a fag

>>61982923
>hold phone sideways

>>61982923
That fucks me over when I use dwm and bottom stack layout.

>>61982706
Do mobile browser user agents differ from desktop browser user agents?

You could block mobile clients, but you're relying on client-side reporting. Throw in JS resolution detection and other JS data collection and you can get a good idea if they're a smartphone user (hell just block the site to anyone who DOESN'T disable javascript)

>>61982961
yes

>>61982968
So that is the solution for 99% of OPs users

OP, just find out mobile browser user agents and block them

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>>61982296
>reliable
not really.
>sorta reliable
check for user agent and browser, blacklist everything originating from a phone.

>>61982960
Oops got it backwards.
It will fuck me over in dwm's normal layout.
And even in floating wms I always have my browser window have more height than width

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>>61982296
This star wars guy looks like professor dumb lmfao.

>>61983009
you're a fucking moron.

>>61983002
how DO you block user agents access when you have a site?

>>61983023
add rules to .htaccess

>>61983022
*your
says the dipshit that can't even spell

Just make your site with static dimensions and make them pinch zoom.

I imagine any smart phone user would simply leave because your website is incredibly shit.

This is the only good way I know of.

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>>61983040
the fact that this is what you consider trolling is seriously embarrassing. way to show your age.

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>People hating on Miles "My life is eternal suffering Edward O'Brien

>>61983035
>using Apache
This is the state of /g/

>>61982362
What the fuck is wrong with you?

>>61983059
*you're
stupid dumbfuck youll never get anywhere in life like that

>>61982439
If you could obtain the IP's of phone networks' outward facing devices, you could range-ban them all. People could still hop on WiFi to post, but at least you've thinned the herd.
>>61982534
>>61982544
Have you never seen the lengths that technically competent and always angry autists will go to just to screw with threads they hate?

map $http_user_agent $is_desktop {

default 0;

~*linux.*android|windows\s+(?:ce|phone) 0; # exceptions to the rule

~*spider|crawl|slurp|bot 1; # bots

~*windows|linux|os\s+x\s*[\d\._]+|solaris|bsd 1; # OSes

}


## Revert the logic.

map $is_desktop $is_mobile {
1 0;
0 1;
}


if ($is_mobile = 1) { return 403; }

nginx -s reload

>>61983023
use PHP or some shit, sherlock.

>>61983088
nginx is gay hipster trash, go fuck yourself.

>>61983289
>traffic filtering at application level
>shitting on nginx
>endorsing PHP
what did he mean by this

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Tabletposter lives matters

>>61983328
nginx is crap though

>>61983729
Maybe back in 2009. Nowadays nginx is superior in every way (performance, modularity, easier to config/deploy, much faster support for cutting edge specs like http2 and TLS 1.3)

>inb4 much BSD craplicense
It's not like Apache 2.0 is copyleft

>>61982296
The same way you block females from having any interaction with you, you basement dweling fuck

>>61982965
Just wrap the entire contents of the site in noscript tags.

>>61983960
Except for providing hosting to multiple users.

>>61982706
>1. Block based on user agent.
>Easily circumventable.

Most mobile users have no idea what a user agent is, much less how to change it. I don't even know how to do it on IOS.

Blocking the user agent wouldn't 100% block all mobile users, as OP requested, but it would get pretty damn close

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>>61984000
>

>>61982296
Run your whole site as a Java applet?

>>61982362
He's wifey. He's fallen for the asian wife meme, tho. Nevertheless, I has a wife which most people here don't have.

>>61982296
write the whole website in flash, they probably removed support for it from most phones already.