If you could eat any animal and absorb it's soul and characteristics

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You know what I want OP
Also, fell for bait hard

A silverback

>>35156413
Probably some kind of spider
>climb on walls
>hair that senses changes in the air
>360 degree vision with some varieties
>webs coming out my back, I could make some sickass spider silk clothes
Shit be rad.

I'd eat a dick. No homo tho

>>35156460
0 dragons left
1000's of honey badgers left

Checkmate milk drinker

>>35156413
Saltwater crocodile, the Philippine eagle, Siberian tiger or polar bear.

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>>35156413
Panda, so I can learn to be a healthy vegan and to cope with the >nogf

>>35156413
A bear, I'd ride a unicycle and be chill as fuck doing it. Minding my own business eating honey and fish nuts and berries and shit minding my own business.

But if you fucked with me I'd destroy you, cause I'm a fucking bear.

>>35156413
>honey badger
That's my spirit animal. Those brehs don't GAF and are tough as shit.

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>>35156466
Muh nigga

a bat, I'd be rich and with all types of gadgets

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Sometimes I like to believe reincarnation is real so that I could have a chance to reincarnate as the best animal. Chances are I would be a cockroach tho

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Lonely wolf ofc

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>>35156413
a bat, you know, so that ill be rich and buff.

>>35156530
>>35156577
I ALREADY MADE THAT JOKE
NICE DUBS THO

>>35156413
none

because I am happy with my own characteristics, not some neet loser furshitter

>>35156533
these are pretty

would be neat to have a snow leopard, spotted hyena and anatolian shepherd as pets but it would only work if I had ample room for them to live in

>>35156533
Truly gentleman taste, snow leopards are the best of cat bros

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easy

>>35156533
>liberals actually believe breeding this with a panther would make a superior species

Probably a wombat.

>>35156466
>>35156501
kek no
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnE3uyj9Grg

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>>35156489
mah nigga

I'd be an animal from the mustelidae family tbeh familia

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George the Animal. His green tongue, body hair & appetite for turnbuckles.

>>35156413
Puma. Great balance of size, speed, and power.

>Jaguar
>become jaguar warrior
>die of smallpox

Id eat a human so there wouldnt be any effect

the hero shrew.

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Tardigrade(water bear)

Come at me, bros

>>35157570
nigga that's some nightmarish shit

Leopard

>2015
>not becoming a supple leopard

>>35157570
Well all you need now is the igrade

>>35157570
manlet pls

Lion

>>35157633
nice one

>>35157580
>Can live for at least 200 years
>Can withstand temperature ranges from −458 °F (−272.222 °C) to 300 °F (149 °C)
>Can withstand pressures about six times greater than those found in the deepest ocean trenches
>Can withstand ionizing radiation at doses hundreds of times higher than the lethal dose for a human
>Can survive in outer space
>Can lower their metabolism to 0.01% of normal and survive without food or water for more than 10 years drying out to the point where their water content because 1% of normal

COME AT ME, BROS. I will be a supreme human in a perfect physical state for all my life.

>>35157570
that was the most resilient and unkillable animal, right?

>>35157743
2nd, 1st place belongs to the jews

>>35157741
Jesus rollerblading Christ

>>35157905
i don't even consider them animals

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>>35156413
Regular American badgers are my spirit animal

>>35156413
A human.

>>Can lower their metabolism to 0.01% of normal and survive without food or water for more than 10 years drying out to the point where their water content because 1% of normal

GOAT bulking technique right there

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>Almost 2016
>No one is choosing the most alpha animal out there.

>>35159250
See >>35156461

>>35159258
lol I fucked up. It was the second comment and I didn't even see it.

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>>35156489
Think of all the sick parties, too

>>35157570
Can be practically frozen, then thaw out and come back to life. Why can't we do this fuck homo sapiens sapiens

>>35157741
youre still a manlet

haha not much of a change, is it now

>>35159250
Fucking life isn't fair, all the effort we have to got through to get swole and this nigga looks like that from eating fucking bark and grass and fruits and laying around all day

I'd choose a woman.

This way I can become a remorseless sociopath.

>>35159703
Kek
I'd choose a horse for obvious reasons

>>35159959
>Strong as fuck
>Dick too strong
>Everyday is leg day
>Bitches be riding me

>>35156730
>Conservatives are too dumb to realize black panthers are just dark furred leopards

>>35156413
Id eat a cat and kick the bowels off the ass of all the bitches nigga

>>35157741
>>Can lower their metabolism to 0.01% of normal and survive without food or water for more than 10 years drying out to the point where their water content because 1% of normal
>>>Can lower their metabolism to 0.01%
>tfw cutting
>tfw you can't eat more than 0,3 Kcal a day or you'll gain weight

>>35159496
>>35157743
Sometimes the simple things are the most powerful

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Mantis shrimp motherfuckers

>>35160277
That's too much power for one man

When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissues have made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.

>>35160583
Its a grown man and a fetus dumbass

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>>35159988
Horses are a poor man's zebra anon.
>be this magnificent stripey motherfucker
>superior equine metabolism only requires 3 hours of sleep a night, can do it standing up
>produce a Coca-cola bottle's worth of jizz every day, 10x as much as a normal horse
>have to masturbate every 90 minutes just to get rid of it all

I'd sell it off as an energy drink tbqh

>>35160277
This. I would become a god among boxers

>>35160277
The Peacock Mantis Shrimp is the only correct choice. Enjoy being able to punch niggers into orbit while you can see literally everything.

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>>35160277

>>35160844
It was an Office reference. Damn

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Great white, a lion/leopard or an elephant

>>35156413

>No tigers here

Absolute keks all of you

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if l eat Kars' hand squirrel do l get invincible pillarman powers?

>>35157633
kek

>>35156484
Under rated.

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This little shit, so I'll have a chance of finding a GF in my lifespan