>Haha there's no way I'll be like that when

>>12983
I still don't drink coffee, stuff's gross, bad for your teeth, and easy to rely too much on.

>>12984
I said the same shit 5 years ago

>>12985
>>12983
fix your sleep schedule faggot

>>12984
right on, i only drink water and eat activated almonds

>>12983

sadly i don't have time for coffee so i go for energy drinks and a lot of cereal bars to soften the impact of my liver and stomach.

>>12986
As you get older your body takes longer to "wake up", even after a full 9 hour sleep.

>>12989
Dude that's because 9 hours of sleep is too fuckin long. People who sleep on an average of 5 to 6 hours live longer. I'm not even that anon and fix your sleep schedule still applies

>>12990
source: my ass

>>12989
>>12990
Right amount for teenagers is about 9 and a quarter hours of sleep IIRC, not sure if that changes as you get older.

>>12992
As you get older you need to sleep earlier so you can still hit your 8-9 hours but you must also be up before the sun so it doesn't burn your eyes in the morning traffic.

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>tfw absolutely love the taste of good coffee, and even good iced coffee (properly made in the cold brew style)

>tfw it makes me shit super bad. even a decently strong cup gives me a straight up diarrhea shit within 30 minutes

>tfw it tweaks me hardcore and i crash hard as well

IT'S NOT FAIR ;_______;

Has the top of Deedee's head ever been seen?

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>>12984
Same, coffee was literally made for the weak

>>12994
>used to love cereal
>used to love cookies and milk
>used to love ice cream

>"lolno fuck you, welcome to the wonderful world of being lactose intolerant"

Getting older fucking sucks.

>>12984
I like the smell of coffee but i don't understand how people can actually claim to like the taste

>>12998
Good coffee tastes how it smells.

Shit coffee smells amazing, then tastes like mud water.

Coffee was the only decent caffeine choice back then. Now you can get energy drinks or pills. And I'm pretty sure most kids would be pretty tired without their tons of sugar in the morning.

>>12997
All of this.

>>12997
This, but replace lactose intolerance with dairy free diet. Luckily, they're getting better at producing more and more good tasting non-dairy products nowadays.(Lactaid's the best for milk if you can have dairy but not lactose)

>>12997
This, but replace lactose intolerance with just having a really weak stomach.

>>12983
I don't drink coffee more than once or twice a month and don't need anything to wake up, but if I go a day without some form of caffeine I get a horrible migraine that leaves me struggling not to vomit.

>>12983
>Haha there's no way I'll be like that when I'm older!
And I was right.
Still no babe wife or loving kids.

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>>12997
>>13001
>>13002
>>13003
>lactose intolerant

non-whites detected

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>>12983
>Mfw I drink a Super Big Gulp of coffee a day because my supervisor is an unrelenting asshole
>mfw he's not really but I take everything super personal and now I have kidney stones.

>>13007
Are you a girl?

>>13006
Nah, I'm a whitey. Got Injun in me though.

Coffee doesn't wake me up.

>>13009
>I'm a whitey. Got Injun in me though.
pick one

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>>13005
Okay, that was actually pretty good.

>>13011
Whatever serves me more on forms I fill out.

>>12984
The most I can drink are lattes or cappuccinos but thats because they are sweet.

>>13008
no, but I'm a pussy ass bitch, I was also molested.

>>13010
stop mixing it like a pussy and drink it black

>>13013
>Black
>Fill in white on SAT
>Have to get counselling
yeah, tell I can be whatever I want to be.

>>12983
I'm 30 and I still don't drink coffee or any time to wake up routine.

>>12983
i dont drink more than two or three cups a month

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>be 28
>started drinking coffee for the first time this week
>mfw this thread shows up
I knew /co/ was always watching me. On another note, shit taste awful but its so damn does it work. I even wake up differently than before, like less groggy and shit.

>>13019
>>13018
t. works less than 35 hours a week, if you even have a job at all

ITT: /r/veganpride

>>12998
here we go

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I lost the ability to digest pork properly about a year ago. Apparently it's a thing on my mother's side. As is living well into their 90's.

There's a monkey's paw in there somewhere.

>>12998
creamer. I use Chocolate and Peppermint Chocolate Brownie

>>12984
Same, Most people I know that drink coffee can't function without it. I don't like the taste I'm pretty much nothing but water and when I'm at a restaurant or fast food place soda.

>>12990
Actually, no. You are the one in the wrong. I sleep six and someone who had run multiple studies on sleep told me I need to sleep longer.
That said it was also in regards to my physical activities and mental activities at the time but I don't think my circumstances were exeptional, especially not here on /co/

>>12989
You need less sleep as you get older because your body isn't growing. The thing is you need GOOD sleep. Most people have shitty mattresses or toss and turn all night.

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>>13005

>>12984
I just like coffee and drink it when it's around.

>>13006
>Niger is less lactose intollerant of most of Europe

>>13006
Shit I'm only half Arab and still lactose intolerant. I still drink milk and eat ice cream though, just not too much at once.

>>12984

suck my dick

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>>13026
>soda

Everyday I keep hearing worse and worse things about what soda apparently does to your health. I can't remember the specifics, but it's never positive. Good on you for not drinking coffee, but try to ease off the soda.

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>whenever I'm rested, don't want to do anything
>whenever I'm sleepy I want to get work done
>started off just staying up late
>now you go days on end without sleeping, drink tons of energy drinks and work out a lot, stay in your room making artwork while talking to yourself and listening to loud music all through the night
>do more work, feel more alive, but pretty much riding on the edge on the verge of crashing every week and just sleep on the weekends
>have also started to have really vivid nightmares when you do, usually wake up screaming
>libido has been so high but you try not to fap, but worried that if your virgin ass goes to a bar to try and pick up chicks you're going to go full caveman and fucking physically hurt a bitch
>have started browsing a lot of information sites and news sites and you actually have a fucking full on bulletin board full of assorted conspiracy info
>otherwise, don't do drugs, don't smoke, eat well, but being an eternal fucking vampire that doesn't stop doing stuff is your vice

I'm afraid I've gone too far out, and that I'm not coming back

>>13033
https://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/images/3/36/Sniper_no04.wav?t=20100625223509

>>13035
You can always come back. I feel you on the only wanting to work when tired though. I reckon I'm gonna try that now. Get pissed enough to be snoozy and smash out some writing.

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>My face when I don't drink any caffeine at all

Godddamn it feels good to be fit and sexy

>>13034
>just teeth
Nigga that shit is bad for you period, especially american made stuff. God knows what they put in it or lie about the ingredient.

>>12983
I only drink coffee once a week at most for the taste. It gives me bad bubbleguts and that stops me from drinking it daily and getting hooked.

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>all these coffee babbies
>hurr durr coffee tastes bad but it works!1!!
>mfw i drink 2 times the caffeine of a cup of coffee with my morning and afternoon tea
Belligerent peasants, the lot of you.

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>>13038
Roids aren't a good substitute either /fit/.

Fun Fact Caffeine fucks with your growth. So all you manlets out there wondering why you're manlet. Blame it on your coffee and yourselves. You fucking coffee drinkers

>>13034
My brother used to inhale diet coke for fucking years, with the excuse that "it's not real sugar, so it's okay!" or saying he knew better than me about it becuase he had a mdeical degree (in fucking cardiopulmonary). He also actually liked the taste of it which baffled me most.

He's 300 pounds with a serious fucking gut now, still some muscle from his years playing sports but his belly is just grossly out of place on his frame, looks like mpreg at this point.

Soda is a trap and "diet" is the biggest fucking lie

>>91206887
So... you're saying... you're black... and in jail?

>>13042
But I'm Fit not Trump Huuuuuge

>>12997
>tfw you're 26 and still eating a bowl everyday without complications beyond gas
Thanks Scottish ancestors.

I do think it is weird that my wisdom teeth have never bothered me, and are probably still in there.

>>91206887
While this is true, and holds true world wide, even in countries where they're the majority.

This really doesn't have anything to do with OP does it?

>>13044
Well, Aspartamine is linked to brain cancer, so it's possible that gut's a tumor.

Though, having tried some of those cane-sugar sodas, I have to say, the flavor problem with Diet soda is because they're imitating the taste of cane-sugar rather than corn-syrup.

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>>13037
You don't understand, it's like a runner's high. A friend once told me it's because the brain gets some adrenaline from staying awake for too long because it thinks it's being hunted by a predator. Honestly explains the dreams where I'm running from stuff.

But it's too good, it's like

Like fuck man I'm an unemployed neet motherfucker but I can make a living off comissions and learn how to code and with the extra time I can do stock exchange shit and I can work out more and I can draw more and it's like an entire fucking realm of reality opened up, no longer a slave to the deep sleep that robs you of action, you become more aware of stuff, you have more time to learn about the world and you only enter that shadow realm once a week to fight your demons, and you come out ready for the next round.

I feel like a fucking wildman, man, I feel like I could run for days, I feel like I can do anything, I can put so much time into anything I please, I can watch all the shows I had in my backlog while drawing and writing, get the money to learn a trade in the wee hours of the night, I can learn skills, I can express myself more. Fuck, if I got a gf I would fucking breed a whole village of kids into her, Im the fucking king of the world

I'm so fucking erect you couldn't believe

>>13047
Same here man.

Scotts have solid genes.

>>13044
>>13049
The problem with diet is that it doesn't make you gain weight but it doesn't make you lose it. The sugar is just inverted in a way where your body still tries to process it but doesn't convert it. If you still keep eating food bad for you than the weight is inevitable. Also, it has been linked to causing cancer but it is minor.

>>12984
I thought the same thing.
And then I went to college.
Half the reason I drink it is for the taste though.

>>13050
As long as you accept the physical and pottentially societal crash that is going to catch you eventually I can't fault you.
You're living your life in a way that is unique and invigorates you. I buckle in and do a shit job I hate while feeling there's no meaning to anything.
You get one life and a lot of people are too frightened or incompetant to make it interesting. Better to risk it for the biscuit if you have the compulsion to do so; that is assuming that you're mature enough to accept the results if/when you eventually make a mistake, crash and your lack of saftey nets don't cushion the crash.

>>12984
I never notice coffee doing anything for me. I just drink it for the taste.

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>>13026
I've switched to water but drink soda occasionally.
It's definitely helped to quite soda a bit, I just can't stand the vegan-level anti-soda people who will jump out of the woodwork the second you mention drinking soda.

>>13055
It generates anxiety Wich helps you stay focused
It also gives you energy but that's only if you aren't already used to it, I sometimes go months without coffee and the first cup after that keeps me awake at night

>>13021
Well duh, working on an office either coffee or a smoke is the only excuse you got to stand up from the chair you have been sitting on for four hours and move a little

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American coffee is pig disgusting
This is real coffee

>>13059
looks disgusting

why do europoors always have to drink out of tiny little cups?

>>12984
Pussy.

You only need coffee because you drink coffee. Go two weeks without taking any caffeine and you'll wake up just fine.

Caffeine is only good for short-term alertness. After a week of regularly drinking coffee, coffee just gets you to normal.

>>12984
I actually get drowsy when I drink any caffeine.

>>13025
>using creamer
Just get better coffee.

>>13060
You answered your own question.

>>13050
No judgements, but this post sounds like you were screaming every word as you wrote it

I just like black coffee. Sometimes I drink it for the energy boost, but mostly I just find it to be an enjoyable experience.

>>13020
taste good if you're willing to invest some effort into it.
also, tap water ruins coffee.
steamed, frothed milk is a gift from the gods though.

>>13035
Are you me but instead of playing games and browsing the web you do shit?
It helps I work 40+ hours every week, 4:00pm-2:30am/4:00am.
My problems gnaw at my mind when I try to sleep so I stay up until I'm so tired I pass out and sleep 12 hours+.
also, extreme over exertion/sleep deprivation has been linked to hypersexuality(I know too well)

>>12983
Replace coffee with Red Bull and you've got it.

>>13041
I like both tea and coffee too much for my own good, the bathroom is my living quarters at this point.

>>13029
>plastic brick automaton is dead and will never update again
sad

>>12984
Same.
I'm 30 and I drink coffee maybe once every 2 months.
My body just can't handle the highs and lows of caffeine.
I'm much more productive and stable without it.

>all these plebs who don't know the joy of coffee+cigarette in the morning after a full breakfast
It almost makes this life worth living

>>12983
Fuck the world it's true.

I thought coffee was awful and never touched the stuff until like 5 years ago when I started getting tired more and more easy through the day and it got harder to wake the fuck up, also I just started being so fucking angry all the time if I was just a little bit sleepy. Now I need at least a cup in the morning or a Red Bull or something if I want to be awake and not treat people like fucking dirt. Parents in cartoons, as it turns out, are almost always great representations of what it's like to be adults (probably because they were written by adults and parents). Who the fuck saw that coming?

>>12983
I don't know. I've always been angry. And caffeine doesn't help.

>>12984

I drink a measurable two gallons of coffee every day. I like the taste and the effect and I'm pretty sure if I stopped now the crash would just kill me.

Also i actually might have undiagnosed ADHD or whatever. There's probably a reason that caffeine makes me feel less jittery and more focused.

>>13012
This picture is the most ironic picture on this thread because Chris Savino himself wrote that episode of Dexter's Lab

>>12984
>gross
you also aren't old enough to post there, kiddo.

>>12994
are you me

>>12997
This happened to me recently.
I am now 25

>>13021
I work 48 hours a week and I don't drink coffee when I wake up, it doesn't do anything for me.

I like the taste, though.

>>13007
For as far as I can remember being a young child my older brother every single day would drink the biggest size big gulp of coca cola, and has been doing this for 20+ years. If it wasn't a big gulp it was a fucking 2ltr of it. He has not missed a God damned day except for the time he was in air Force basic training, and I'm sure they still had soda cause air Force.
The fucker is 44 and still doesn't have diabetes and has all his teeth.

>>13042
I'm gonna reread taru taru for nostalgic reasons

>>13043
I used to drink those powdered coffee things that came in a square aluminum can back when I was 8, my brother's all said the same thing.
Now I'm 6'4 and taller then all them

>>13082
I'm not much of a coffee drinker, but it does have a noticeable effect on me. I perk up quicker when I have coffee in the morning. If I don't have coffee it's not a big deal though. Not getting a cup of coffee wouldn't cause me to be in a bad mood or anything.

When I was about 19 or 20 I would drink a cup of coffee every morning. Watch the news and have breakfast while sipping the cup. DESU it was a pretty awesome feeling, and made mornings something I look forward to. The only reason I stopped was because I changed jobs so I didn't have time for that sort of thing, but even then it wasn't like it was difficult to stop drinking coffee.

That being said, a good friend of mine is one of those "stay away from me until after I've had my coffee" type people. Must be some genetic thing.

>>13074
>Smoking and drinking coffee

Thankfully you'll die soon enough

>>13024
We'll likely have a cure for aging before we have a cure for people who can't digest pork properly. So there's a chance you could live to be over 200 and still not able to eat pork.

As a side note most of the men on my dad's side have made it over 95, which I find amazing. However, they tend to become infirm around age 70, and dementia is common. So I have that to look forward to.

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>coffee
Fuck that noise

>>13078
Well thanks for pointing that out you fucking shit stain.

>>13089
have you ever considered suicide?

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coffee makes me poop

>>13091
If I ever start regularly drinking coffee I'll just poison it

>>12984
the only time I ever need coffee is if I need to work overnight. I still get up early in the morning alert as fuck in my thirties

>>13085
Just think, anon, you could have been 7 ft tall

I feel sleepy all day, and no aout of coffe or energy drinks ever made feel even a little bit less sleepy

What am I doing wrong?

>>12983

I'm confused. Were there two of these threads?

>>22028
There were. We got April Fooled.

>Wake up
>go to /co/
>wonder where the april fool joke is
>move onto /ck/
>see this again

>>22035
We are on /cock/, what the fuck are you talking about.

>>22029

W-where did all the new and original posts come from? It did they just roll back the board an hour before doing this?

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>>13093

>>22050
Aye, I lost some in threads I posted. Ah well~

An entire thread of faggots, i fucking love coffee, kid me was so damn wrong

>>12998
Your body learns to like something that contains a chemical it craves. If it "notices" that you get more caffeine in you after drinking coffee is "learns" that coffee is the source and your brains processes the taste differently. The same is true for any chemical your body craves, either naturally or an acquired craving via addiction. It's the same reason why people learn to like the taste of beer, wine, or liquor. Note that it isn't necessarily the taste of the actual CHEMICAL in question: caffeine itself has no taste. However, your body learns to associate the flavor of coffee with caffeine.

If your body already has a flavor/chemical association, it's harder to acquire a new association. Someone who drinks alot of caffeinated soda is unlikely to develop a taste for coffee for this reason, while someone with no prior exposure to caffeine will develop the taste quickly.

But coffe don't work anymore....

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>Gave up coffee a year ago after 5 years to see any side effects.
>Used to drink one a day minimum, often two or three.
>Get a mild mild headache that only lasts the afternoon, don't feel exhausted, easily aggravated, or unfocussed.
>Nothing else after that.
>Only have it occasionally now, still enjoy it but actually notice the energy rush.
Well, looks like it didn't happen to me when I got older.

I've always found that high-concentration caffeine affects me in what i feel must be an unusual manner. It doesn't give me any particularly noticeable mental effect, but does make my eyes and face FEEL as though i'm tired (eyes heavier and slightly scratchy, slightly uncomfortable increased but 'slower' kinesthetic sense of my faces skin).

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>>12997

>tfw inherited IBS
>end up on the toilet with the shits after nearly every meal
>im only 22

>>22255
>Only have it occasionally now, still enjoy it but actually notice the energy rush.
this is the patrician choice

>>22255
>older
you sound 20 at worst. You have no idea what's life has for you yet.

coffee coffee coffee

Barely any mentions of tea.

Reprobates, the lot of you

>>22464
Earl Grey and pure Black reporting in.

>>12997
>Mfw 26 and black and still never experience this shit only until I try to make homemade milkshakes

thank you shitty ass father and your half white genes

funny thing, i think i drank so much coffee growing up the stuff doesnt do a whole lot for me nowadays

i mean i dont mind it, but i can function just fine without a coffee in the morning

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>>13006
>half of venezuelans are lactose intolerant

it doesnt really seem like it, i mean my sister is, but nobody else i know is

>>13020
>>be 28
>>started drinking coffee for the first time this week

what took you so long?

>>12984
>bad for your teeth
Really, even without sugar?

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>>12997
>mfw i can eat whatever i want
>mfw stomachlets

>>23671
"lactose intolerant" include people who can perfectly drink milk, but with minor issues like farts, or soft shits afterwards.

>>23742
>soft shits

i fucking wish, ever since i arrived to chile ive shat nothing but bricks, constipated as fuck

since i used to live in a MUCH warmer climate i used to drink a lot of water back home, over here its way colder so i feel less thirsty, but turns out i fucking NEED to drink copious amount of water to shit properly. I started doing just that and now i have to pee every 2 minutes

>coffee and other stimulants take about 10 hours to work in me
>basically it makes them irrelevant when I need them
>tfw when a lot of calmatives don't work at all even though I never took them before
>have to go through wageslave days sleepy and stressed

>>23705
These people are idiots.

>>12984
>look at me im better then everyone else

Most people drink it because its the "adult" thing to do, and they stomach the bad taste for the benefits of caffeine. Just saying this actually makes people mad, same thing with shitty beer.

Anyways I like some coffee flavours, and creamers can make it taste great.

>>24041

>being this triggered that someone doesn't consume unhealthy shit

insecure much?

Joke's on you; hot drinks hurt my mouth so I don't drink them.

>>24115
Nigger if I need caffeine I will drink coffee or an energy drink, it's not about the "adult' thing to drink coffee, it's called I NEED TO BE AWAKE

>>24115

Yeah I'm sure coffee beans and hops were initially grown, harvested, distilled into a drinkable liquid, and ebentually made into a world industry because the people who did so were trying to act mature.

Either that or caffeine and alcohol are real chemicals that affect the body in desirable ways. It's a mystery.

>>24345
>it's the "don't talk to me without my coffee" guy
Try adding bleach to you coffee as opposed to creamer

>>25946

Do you have such a wounded relationship with coffee that you have a problem when tired people drink it to wake themselves up?

>>24345
This. In the real world you need to be fully functional by 7 in the morning.

>>26000
No, I have an issue with addicts.
If you literally can't function without a cup of mudwater every morning, you're an addict.

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>>13006
>mfw Niger confirmed white

>>12984
Pussy.

>>26056
I stopped drinking coffee a year and a half ago just because I didn't have time to make/get any and after a short period of adjustment my body was much better off for it. You are only tired until your coffee because your body has built a chemical dependency for it. I used to sleep as late as possible and be a zombie all day but now I'm fresh and ready to go right out of bed.

>>12983
I got hooked in cola since I was a kid. It's my substitute to coffee. It's probably no better for me.

>>13038
>get a load of this faggot .jpeg

>>26323
All that sugar? Nigga it's WORSE.

>>22372
I've had Crohns since I was 12 and I'm 25 now. that shit sucked and still does

>>13049

You misspelled aspartame. Also, you're full of shit.

>>13092
>tfw the smell of your poop wakes you up
DOO DOO DOO DOO DOODOO DOOWAAAAAAAAAAAA~

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>>12983
>tfw when you actually believed that as a kid
>now you can't move in the morning unless you have a jug of coffee inside you

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>>26323
Soda is considerably worse for you

>Drink black coffee
>Awake and fine
>Drink tea
>Awake and really bad headaches
>Drink energy drink
>Awake and homicidal

>>26556
>do a line of coke
>awake and winning

>>26643
>have kids
>awake and thinking about how they'll take care of you were you're old

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>tfw I'm itching for a cup of coffee right now but got no milk.
Without milk the coffee is too hot, and when it gets colder it's way too cold to drink.
With milk the temperature gets perfect and you can drink it straight away, and it looks more appealing and taste better.

>>26108

How old are you, do you work? Do you deny the importance of the morning ritual? Are you so independent from all things that you wouldn't be frustrated if I, say, took away your internet connection?

>>26846
You should buy milk.

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>>12984
>TFW 21 and I avoid drinking alcohol and coffee, and smoking cigarettes because I'm so god damn cheap with my money

>>26846
>coffee with milk

just jizz in it you pansy faggot, should taste about the same

>>26846
ice cube

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>>26846
cream and evaporated milk also work, depending on the kind, and the coffee.

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>>27116
>TFW 21 and I avoid drinking alcohol and coffee, and smoking cigarettes because I want to live a long life
>but on the other hand I also drink root beer

>>12983
I'm 30, and the only coffee I've ever had was a free sample of ice coffee.

It was disgusting

>>27483
moderation is your friend

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>>27168
>he doesn't add evaporated milk and sugar to accentuate different flavors in his coffee
I mean, good coffee is rather fine without, but it's just one way of playing

>>27483
Why live a long boring life when you can have a fun one that's like 3/4 the length?

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>>12997
I'm proud of myself for cutting back on dairy and switching to vegan alternatives. Most of it was junk food anyway and I'm also trying to lose weight and eat a healthier, more balanced diet.

My parents weren't the best at nutrition. I don't miss not being in control of what's on my plate and swallowing whatever garbage treats my parents would let me have.

>>27483
>living a long life
That's stupid. You're just gonna die.

>>22464
>tea
ah yes, the preferred drink of over one billion indians, the true masterrace

>>12984
All cofee does for me is make me really hyper and twitchy

Never did a whole lot for my study ethics but maybe it's because I drink shit tier coffee?

>>27779
caffeine effects alertness/awareness, not your shitty work ethic

>>27641
kill yourself then, Mr genius

>>13006
I live in a South American country and I only know three people that are lactose intolerant. And one of them lives in the US.

>>27829
Well I was just reading this thread and a lot f people seem to imply that it helps with focus when they study or whatever, but always had an opposite effect on me

>>12984
Fucking faggot

>>27861

He does by drinking coffee, you homicidal prude.

For all the faggots in this thread who drink coffee to wake up, you are mentally weak and have low willpower. Just get the fuck up, it's literally not that hard. That or stop staying up late at night beating off your dick to 2D characters and go to bed at a reasonable time. That being said, tea is pretty based.

t. 26 year old with a 40 hour week

>no caffeine all day
>just run on nicotine

>>13072
He still posts Hampture updates.

>>13087
God willing, but in the meantime I'm finding happyness in a line of meth, a shot of gin, a cigarette, and a cold shower to wake me up in the morning.

Seriously, nothing does the trick more. I go from 0-to-110 in under 5 minutes.

>>13022
Why do you even know what that subreddit is, anon?

Why are you so new?

>>28336
>40 hour week

Do you think that's impressive or something?

>>28596
Considering i'm making 72k/yr while being in the workforce for only 4 years, yes :^).

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The first cofee you ever had gave you cafeine high

>>26549
Is it just the light or is there actually something in the bottled water bag?