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Anonymous
JSA Storytime: Digglebolts 2015-12-19 01:05:27 Post No. 78278023
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JSA Storytime: Digglebolts 2015-12-19 01:05:27 Post No. 78278023
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Good evening owls of /co/,
This will be less edgy than the last, I hope
>>
>>78278023
Yay, Songbird's back!
>>
>>78278023
so sleepy...
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>>78278068
dat ass
>>78278043
this ties into a Secret Warriors plotline, but it's not an actual crossover and we don't really need to go there, thankfully
>>
>>78278023
Hello Storyteller.
>Songbird
Oh thank goodness, Melissa's here. Finally a character who isn't a bland edgelord.
Ghost has barely been in this so far, so he doesn't count.
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>>78278096
that's quite the keikaku
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>>78278132
here's some good ol' topical fascism
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>>78278143
that's some escalation :|
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>>78278149
so how are you owls? quiet night?
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>>78278167
Storytimed All-Star Section Eight.
Realize that it's Ennis doing "It's A Wonderful Life" with Sixpack as Jimmy Stewart and Superman as Clarence
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>>78278167
Is "sonic tentacles" a *fans self* situation?
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>>78278167
Don't know where everyone else is. Maybe they're still recovering from the SoP last night.
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>>78278200
I was right, right? Only the edge of that seat?
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>>78278198
>NNAAAGH!
I think I just had a trauma flashback.
>>
>>78278218
I was more captivated by how his tattos changed with every artist
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>>78278218
A mystery man!
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>>78278132
I can't help but read Ghost's lines in Doug Jones' voice. There's no way he doesn't sound like Psycho Mantis.
>>78278143
>>78278149
When is fascism ever not topical? Everyone is always worried about their rights being oppressed.
Although real life rarely has such blatant strawmen like this.
>>
>>78278218
Too right. I hope that anon that took the drinking game seriously is alright.
>>
>>78278270
>>78278255
I think it's pretty Comics Design 101 to realize "the fancier you make it, the more it will vary by each artist/panel to panel"
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>>78278273
Oh...oh NO, someone was actually doing it?
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>>78278167
Based Melissa.
I'm fine. 4chan has been particularly bad today.
Though the Steven Universe hiatus is almost over, so looking forward to that.
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>>78278323
I spent the day helping with the nieces
I got an amazing beer out of it, at least...
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>>78278319
Oh, you didn't see it?
>>78259719
>>
>>78278218
>I was right, right? Only the edge of that seat?
ONLY THE BLEEDING EDGE
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>>78278336
Eric's kind of a fun character in that he's an awful person but he's not a psycho
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>>78278363
Bless their heart. That looks like heading for a massive hangover.
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>>78278393
>all this Mr. X shilling
Stoooooooooop.
>>78278336
>help kids
>get beer
The reward is the medicine, eh?
>>
>>78278363
As somebody with low alcohol tolerance, I'm pretty sure if I did any of our SoP drinking games I'd end up in the hospital.
>>
>>78278083
How bad was Secret Warriors? Did go from promising start to shit, or was it just shit from the start?
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>>78278433
Yeah, that beer was kind of mandatory by the time I got it
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>>78278443
it's kind of up and down because it's deliberately WHEELS WITHIN WHEELS twisty
I remember the Ares and Phobos stuff being good
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>>78278103
O'Grady isn't that bland either, but this isn't his best writing.
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>>78278504
Seekrit Warriors was all the Nick Fury vs. Osborn shenanigans, combined with "HYDRA has been gaming SHIELD from the start" retcons
>>
>>78278517
i really miss nick fury
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>>78278543
>Art Deco variant
... now I want to re-read Starman.
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>>78278459
>Ma'am.
>Call me Sir.
..... I'm sure there's a reason for that, but I honestly can't be arsed to think of it.
>>78278488
O-Grady seems okay. I like how he's sort of the requisite not-actually-a-bad-guy character.
Captcha. An Osprey helicopter is not a plane.
>>
>>78278554
always worth re-reading Starman
>>
>>78278573
Fixer and Mach IV/V!
>>78278563
O'Grady is originally from 'Irredeemable Ant-Man', and he's a total pervert
>>
>>78278504
>>78278517
Oh fuck me, I think I figured out what her secret identity is.
I hope I'm right, because that would possibly be the only clever thing in this run.
>>
>>78278608
dat Songbird
>>
>>78278573
>>78278592
Never gonna be able to look at Fixer the same way again.
I mean, dude murdered his past self and replaced him in the timeline. That is so messed up.
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>>78278652
'Cleavon Twain'
that's fucking hilarious
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>>78278563
>>..... I'm sure there's a reason for that, but I honestly can't be arsed to think of it.
Two possible reasons: 1. Being a woman in a male-dominated organization makes her worried about not being taken seriously, so she makes him call her "Sir" so as to make him give her the respect a male officer would get. 2. being called ma'am makes women feel old lol
This run is stupid enough that 2 may just be possible.
>>
>>78278623
You know, as annoying and creepy as S/D was, he's got excellent taste in waifus. Delicious Melissa.
>>
>>78278753
fetish bingo: check
>>
>>
>>78278687
That's his actual name? No wonder he's a supervillain, damn.
>>78278690
Reason 1 makes sense. Reason 2 is bullshit. At least in my experience. Never met a woman who was oversensitive about her age. So it's just one more stereotype that I don't get.
>>
>>78278786
Hey, /k/, what's the knife?
>>
>>78278786
>FAP
The motion lines do not help.
>>
>>78278866
dating your teammates: good idea/bad idea
>>
You know what I think?
Norman doesn't necessarily want Melissa dead because she's a threat to his new set up and all his plans.
I think he wants to kill her because he's butthurt she beat him in a straight fight.
>>
>>78278798
Is the fact that an NY Times columnist wrote an article about how they cringe every time they get called 'ma'am' evidence this is real or evidence that columns are stupid?
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>>78278948
That's a good part of it
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>>78278952
B. Columns are insipid crap. They're like blogs that pretend to be informative.
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>>78279048
raise your hand if you're surprised
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>>78278980
>the sound tentacles have suckers and a fleshy texture
I should be thinking of how physically bullshit this is, but I can't help but think that Melissa is one seriously dirty chick.
>>
>>78279042
Does anecdotes of real-life acquaintances being depressed over being called ma'am count as evidence?
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>>78278878
Considering how much superhero fiction goes over how dating civilians is hard, not that bad an idea.
>>
>>78279110
>Daredevil facing the right way
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>>78279062
>"genetic camouflage"
>puts on a ginger wig
BRAVO
R
A
V
O
>>
>>78279062
Called it!
Disguising herself as her own knockoff. Actually not a terrible idea.
>>
>>78279062
Nice! Generic action woman just became cool.
>>
>>78278517
what's the point on going by the Whiskey Chaser callsign if you're just gonna say who you are anyway?
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>>78279091
Maybe, but it's personal preference. I don't enjoy being girl/miss in lieu of words for adults.
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>>78279166
It's also a reminder to bring back booze on your way home from the mission.
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>>78279166
it's not as bad as the Age of Ultron "Nick Fury never wrote anything down!/Here's Nick Fury's detailed plans"
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>>78279091
It counts as evidence of at least one person being really insecure.
>>78279116
Dating civvies shouldn't really be that much of a problem. Any supervillain who manages to last any length of time is goping to be smart enough to kn ow that messing with a hero's loved ones is flat out one of the dumbest, most suicidal things you can do.
>>
hey thread
>>78279110
Bought this for the cover
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>>78279126
Are you saying that there are more than one face for each gender? Lies!
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>>78279246
get ready for some BULLSHIT
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>>78279228
No, I won't forgive you.
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>>78279217
Hey, maybe, stay with me now. Maybe the sameface phenomenon is actually happening in-universe.
Hair color can throw you off normally, but if everyone literally looked alike, changing one's hair would be an excellent disguise!
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>>78279260
christ, this is fucking stupid
Not least because it doesn't matter if you're psychic, that would only tell you about what a person thinks they're doing, not what they're really doing, and with shootan that's not the same thing
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>>78279201
I was actually thinking more along the lines of "they get really annoyed around the fifth time you cancel a date because somebody decided to build an orbiting death ray again".
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>>78279296
EAT SHIT AND DIE
weak to wide-area attacks :D
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>>78279287
People were supposed to buy that Karla Sofen was Carol Danvers.
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>>78279296
I was hoping he was going to actually catch it, Ozymandias-style
>>
Have some John Byrne complains about Star Wars
http://johnbyrnedraws.tumblr.com/post/135475463985/johnbyrnedraws-darth-vader-unmasked-by-john
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>>78279287
Makes sense, and it shuts up all those "Clark Kent just wears glasses" guys.
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>>78278851
she looks like Cyborg Ninja from MGS in that last panel
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>>78279228
>I'm just glad I can speak using articles again.
Is it just me, or is this book getting slightly bett-
>*teleports behind you*
.....Never mind.
>>
>>78279324
BTFO
now Robbie, he could fuck Mr. X sideways easily
>>78279336
oh god, that's vintage Byrne pedantry
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>>78279324
Based Mel.
>>78279332
Exactly.
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>>78279397
Wait, is she going to suck the poison out?
>>
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>>78279246
it should have been explosive, and detonated right after he said that
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>>78279449
knowing ghost he probably microwaved his own intestines just in case
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>>78279477
That's what I was expecting. But knowing this guy,he'd probably find a way to dodge the point blank explosion...
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>>78279449
Good ol' Ghost. He's not in this run much, but he still manages some quality panel time.
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>>78279545
awwww, shit
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>>78279588
clever play. osborn
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>>78279628
you owls want the 'other perspective' pages, too?
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>>78279628
>Norman jerking off to the footage of execution
Absolute madman.
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>>78279628
>first panel
man that genetic shit really did a number on nat
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>>78279628
>I'll review the footage later... When I'm alone.
Ew. I didn't think he was THAT butthurt about getting his ass kicked.
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>>78279678
this is Norman, he Takes! It! Personally!
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>>78279675
she looks like a Silvester Stallone charicature
>>
Neat. I missed one or two storytimes, last I saw was the start of this new team, with Goblin bursting into Air Force One. What happened between that and this, might I ask?
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>>78279692
RIP Nick LMD no.4253534523
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>>78279711
Suffering
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>>78279728
So this is how it went down ala Hickman
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>>78279711
we watched Mr Edge masturbate for several issues
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>>78279654
>kid
>nothing personal
He's really doing it.
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>>78279654
>you are not monsters
>she says to Mr. X
Natasha.... There's a very thin line between idealism and naivete, and you just leaped right the fuck over it.
>>
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>>78279711
a lot of stupid shit, including Mr. X
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>>78279758
>>
>>78279728
How long until we find out Watcher!Nick is an LMD and the real Nick is ????
Does anyone at marvel remember Watcher!Nick?
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>>78279772
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>>78279800
So there's Ares, that's Bullseye dressed up as Hawkeye...
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>>78279758
>>78279772
Man Osborn, I'm pretty sure Fury has seen shit that would straighten your hair right out
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>>78279777
I'm sure Aaron does. He still has to tell what he told Thor.
>>
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>>78279814
And there's Phobos! Hi, you little scamp!
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>>78279830
okay, THAT took me by surprise
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>>78279830
Wtf
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>>78279758
>>78279772
So from Fury's perspective, this was more of a rambling speech about "dirty business" and blah blah blah. Sounds about right, actually.
>>
>>78279830
Long story short, more shenanigans ensue, and they get away, so back to our main story
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>>78279847
He's got some shit to settle with his dad
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>>78279830
>thought it was a remote controlled Fury clone
>actually a Fury shaped robot suit worn by Phobos
.... Okay, I must admit I didn't see that coming.
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>>78279895
Secret Warriors is Weisman-style keikaku all the way down
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>>78279886
At least they eventually got to chill together in Actual Heaven.
>>
>>78279830
wait what
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>>78280048
whoops?
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>>78279123
He always knows where that ass is. Its his secret superpower.
>>
>>
>>78280118
Shouldn't Mr. X have known that?
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>>78278196
I was in there after you finished. Thanks for doing that one
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>>78280132
>>78280138
I think he can tell what's happening but not always the analytics of it, and he's ridiculously self-centered
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>>78280132
I can only conclude that Mer Edge gets a full body skingraft every time he runs out of room for more tats, and has his previous hide tanned and hung on his wall
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>>78280048
>>78280069
Who else REALLY wanted him to swing at Mr. X, but immediately realized that X's bullshit telepathy would let him dodge it and make a sandwich in the time it would take to *teleport behind him*?
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>>78280163
more fapping
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>>78280138
He did, he just wanted to have an excuse to kill everyone there
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>>78280177
is that hercules?
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>>78280163
Yeah, that's the sound effect you want to use with that pose.
>>
>>78279857
This really would make more sense with Dark Avengers.
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>>78280177
HINT HINT
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>>78280203
BENDIS, anon, BENDIS.
16 issues of BENDIS.
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>>78280211
O haiNuke.
>>
>>78280197
Headsman, Cleavon Twain, an Untold Tales of Spider-Man Busiek original.
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>>78280226
BTFO
T
F
O
>>
>>78280226
Nothing's impossible.
>>
>>78280226
oh, that's who he is
>>
>>78280226
I remember it being pretty solid Bendis at the start tho.
>>
>>78280211
It's pretty sad when you manage to be such a sickheaded edgelord that you fail to work in a Thunderbolts book.
Though I suppose any good villain book ough to strive for some balance, portraying the villains as people instead of caricatures of evil traits.
>>
>>78280244
BASED GHOST
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>>78279639
After the reveal? Sure.
>>
https://twitter.com/geoffjohns/status/677733259669667840
Johns got another dog
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>>78280290
awwww yeah
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>>78280244
Based Ghost.
That was OH so satisfying.
>>
>>78280299
Awww. Looks like an cute, old little guy, tho.
>>
>>78280299
How do bulldogs' faces even work
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>>78280413
Pure, unfiltered inbreeding. Gives them several kinds of health issues, too. :(
>>
>>78280458
hitchin' a ride
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>>78280467
lol
one more, or not?
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>>78280497
that facemask makes no sense but it looks fukken cool
>>
>>78280480
I can do with more.
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>>78280480
Eh. I'm pretty tired, to be honest.
>>
>>78280511
Better than Cyclops X-visor!
>>
>>78280514
We've got a slightly longer one-shot before Parker takes over, with that same cast
>>
>>78280521
this one is pretty much a one-and-done, so you can really skip it if you're sleepy
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>>78280541
Hi Luke.
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>>78280541
Also Remender!?
>>
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>>78280618
AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH
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>>78280562
>one and done
Sounds reasonable.
>>78280569
This is such a cheery narrator, huh?
>Friendship is a myth.
This is why the Romans eventually lost their empire.
>>
>>78280541
OH! I remember this one! Its a good one.
>>
>>
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>>78280638
Looks a might familiar...
>>
>>78280700
Danny is a fucking lot smarter than Wolverine
>>
>>78278690
In the military, women in command positions are traditionally addressed as "sir," which, in that context, is more a respect to a superior than a gendered term. How do you not know this?!
>>
>>78280647
That and the barbarians pushing their shit in.
>>
>>78280758
Oh, Rick
>>
>>78280638
I think covering up Iron Fist's chest was a mistake, incidentally.
>>
>>78280777
>>78280779
How can you cover up that sweet a chest tat?
>>
>>78280737
...I'm not in the military nor do I hang out with people in the military?
>>
>>78280828
you just made him mad
>>
>>78280862
oh bless you, Rick Remender, for panel #2
>>
>>78280777
>there's nothing worse than a nerd trying to be funny by spitting out pop culture references
Mr. X has no self awareness, does he?
>>
>>78280884
here's some textbook Norman Crazy
>>
So just to get this out of the way: Does anyone here give half a shit if they make TV Iron Fist Asian?
>>
>>78280871
I wonder if there's gonna be any mind reader on both Marvel and DC that would fall for Urameshi's gamble.
>>
>>78280905
Not really
>>
>>78279035
>If I wanted you dead, you'd be dead.
Why do ALL these complete normies think they can actually take Songbird? It's like, shit, she's Pink Green Lantern with the occasional sonic scream, your superpower of being a stereotypical bond henchgirl isn't going to cut it here.
>>
>>78280926
i love luke cage.
>>
>>78280905
Not really
Not watching it either way
>>
>>
>>78280955
Plus mind control, sometimes. Sonic wizard magic even allows her to break shit she can't with regular force.
>>
>>78280901
>riding a glider around the office
you're slipping, norman
>>
>>78280926
Same. Unless a character's race is important to their character, it doesn't really matter.
Like how the NBC Wonder Woman pilot made Veronica Cale English for some insane reason, when being a Texan is a huge part of her character.
>>78280942
>SWEET CHRISTMAS
Oh Luke.
Another good example, Luke here is pretty firmly a black character. To change that would be a pretty severe alteration of who he is.
>>
>>78281009
I never get tired of things literally blowing up in Mr. X's face.
>>
>>78281116
I know, right? I'd read a full issue of nothing but Mr. X getting beaten up
>>
>>78281153
I hear that "Misty's pregnant" got resolved real weird
>>
>>78280955
I think the idea is that people keep underestimating her because she's nice. She's genuinely affable and easygoing. Which to many people translates to being a pushover.
Odd how they indeed keep forgetting the bit about solid constructs made of sound, which is such an insult to physics that it almost looks like flipping God the bird.
>>
>>78281208
AGAIN!
fuck your sunglasses, X
>>
>>78281166
Fake chi-baby from Danny's chi-dickings. Dumbest shit, Danny should be out being the best baby-daddy he can be right now instead of whatever nothing he's doing.
>>
>>78281166
Chi-jizz fucks pregnancy tests or something.
>>
>>78281224
Lame lame lame lame
>>
>>78281260
Ghost is wonderful
>>
>>78281224
I freaking love Mr. X. Dude's such an arrogant smug shit, you'd think seeing him getting his shit pushed in every time would get old.
Somehow, it never does.
>>
>>78281224
X getting rekt will never get old.
>>78281243
>Fake chi-baby from Danny's chi-dickings.
..... Wut. Sounds like a cop out.
>>
>>78281293
Poor Eric. That had to be not fun.
Thanks for reading, and tomorrow we pick up Jeff Parker writing this motley band of villains, through to Siege
>>
>>78281323
Thanks OP!
>>
>>78281307
every time I see him it just makes me miss Agent X, Deadpool's more sophisticated half-clone. He deserved better than obesity and arthritis
>>
>>78281317
>..... Wut. Sounds like a cop out.
It probably was. Marvel execs decided they didn't want any more babies or stable relationships, but they were too huge of pussies for a miscarriage storyline.
>>
>>78278802
close range hamas
>>
>>78278773
if the others want osborn dead they should just hint to mr edge here that normie is pretty strong
>>
>>78281377
it's that damn sliding timeline.If they'd just let heroes have kids and grow older, then they always have someone on-hand when they want to pass a mantle to someone new.
>>
>>78281323
Thanks for posting as always, Storyteller.
This run did see some marked improvement. It wasn't great, but it got pretty decent near the end there when Songbird came back and Ghost entered the picture.
Mr. X works well as a joke character. It's fun to watch the arrogant asshole get rekt.
>>
I'm surprised none of the characters have pointed out that Osborn stopped taking his meds a while ago
>>
>>78281464
Pretty sure he keeps the meds in Avengers Tower.
>>
>>78281464
Everyone in Digglebolts is too incompetent for that.
>>
>>78281453
plus it shows how much he never actually pushed himself. He has no tactics against energy manipulators and is exponentially more useless when outnumbered. You'd think a guy like him would decide he wants to experience the death of a god, or a hulk, or an entire team dying at the same second
>>
>>78281543
Mr. X is like merc equivalent of a guy who goes around kicking sand in peoples' faces at the beach but runs off like a pussy if there's someone bigger than him.
>>
>>78279166
it's like putting a door on a building so that entering through the wall looks even more impressive and cool
>>
rise
>>
>>78280618
Osborn doesn't understand, he never had a bro.
>>
Guys, I left after the evil iron man kill the F.A.C.T. bitch.
Somebody can help me with links to the other threads.
>>
>>78282598
thanks man
>>
>>78280831
Pop culture? Have you never seen a movie?
>>
>>78283788
I can't think of any movies I've seen involving women as military officers, and even if I did movies aren't exactly known for being true to life.
>>
>>78278023
Black Widow II would make a great Metal Gear character.
>>
>>78280905
Considering he's essentially a White-Chinese guy that returns to America, where he finds out he has every known privilege under the sun, and uses them to help people, and with the help of his black friend learns how his 'White, rich privilege" effect people/those around him. Yeah, I would be pretty darn pissed, and I'm a person who could get less of a fuck about race-bending.
For Powerman and Iron Fist to work Danny needs the WASP background. He just keeps on being slandered by those who don't grasp his origin at all. He's not a tourist to K'un-Lun, he's an immigrant of K'un-Lun, who was took in at a very young age, too young to really understand his cushy lifestyle in America.
>>
>>78279296
I'm not sorry, but this will always be my favorite page.
>>
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>>78287684
Danny Rand is half-asian?
>>
>>78278068
The man face, oh god
>>
>>78278711
Does that mean Diamondback is good?
>>
>>78289115
Diamondback is top Captain America waifu
>those issues where she was chained to Crossbones' rape dungeon
>>
>>78287728
Wendell and Heather Rand were white people.
>>
>>78287728
No, ethnically Caucasian, culturally K'un-Lunian. Literally the opposite of an Asian-American.
>>
>>78278433
If you don't like Mr. X, then stick around till the end, you'll enjoy what happens to him.
>>
rise
>>
>>78296365
one last bump
>>
>>78278802
Knives are not my specialty, but that looks like a sawbacked bowie knife.
More of a hunting knife or a mall ninja knife than a fighting or throwing one, but it's big, mean looking and suitable for a big mean biker dude.
It's similar to the one used in the rambo movies.
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