ITT: We come up with horrible ideas for new Spongebob episodes

SpongeBob gets an eye infection.

That's the episode.

>>78256660
Spongebob gets cancer hilarity ensues.

Patrick kills Spongbob's ______

Has Spongebob ever acknowledged how shitty it's gotten?

Even Simpsons jabs itself sometimes.

>>78256660
Spongebob rips off his nose hilarity ensues

>>78256776
Anal virginity

>>78256776
boner

Bob learns about how sponges reproduce and tries to fulfill his biological needs.

>>78256660
Spongebob is constipated hilarity ensues

Spongebob teaches children about religion

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>>78256827
>implying

>>78256777
Actually, no, I don't think so.

You have to remember that the new writers for SpongeBob aren't intentionally trying to desecrate its legacy. They simply have a job to do. Plus, it's for kids, so why bother trying? (this question's rhetorical you autists)

Fuck, why aren't these creative enough?

Is new-Spongebob just lackluster in it's badness?

>>78256660
Spongebob hears about a dead body by the train tracks and goes to find it with childhood friends, eventually shooting the neighbourhood bully.

Spongebob gets extremely sick to the point where his nose becomes all huge and inflamed.

He spends the episode sneezing on everything and everyone, eventually flooding the entire town with his mucus.

>>78256660
Spongebob learns to check for prostate cancer hilarity ensues

>>78256660
Spongebob tries to get Squidward to try a krabby patty.

>SpongeBob has to do laundry
>hilarious antics insue
That's the episode

>>78256940
But this already happened.

>>78256965
Fuck this is the best one in the thread.

This is actually what most new Spongebob episodes are like

Squidward attempts to do something. Spongebob ruins it

Spongebob shoots up his boating school hilarity ensues.

Are the most recent episodes any good?

>>78256997
FUCK YOU

>>78257001
The Mr. Krabs teaching Spongebob to drive one was pretty good

>>78256984
Not to defend new Spongebob, but old Spongebob was like that too.

>Spongebob tries to give Gary a bath
>hilarity ensues

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>>78256777
>Spongebob's cousin destroys his tv
>"There's nothing good on tv anyway."
>looks at audience
>"Nothing."

>>78257023
At least in those episodes, you got good jokes and interesting scenarios.

>>78257074
>>78257023
The difference between old Spongebob and new Spongebob isn't the quality of jokes, it's the fact that old Spongebob actually HAD jokes. If you watch an episode of new Spongebob you realize that there are rarely any jokes. Things just happen.

Spongebob faces a existential crisis and loses all interest in making krabby patties, as a customer complained about a krabby patty he served. The problem was very minor but Spongebob overblown the mistake out of proportion,hyperventilated and freaked out.

Mr. Krab forces Squidward to get Spongebob back to his old self, but in typical squidward fashion quits. Mr. Krab tells spongebob to go home and sleep the criticism off.

Patrick sees this as an opportunity to teach Spongebob the way of the sea star; doing nothing at all, that fails miserably as spongebob quickly gets bored

Spongebob approaches sandy about his problem, sandy proposes to probe him, bob reluctantly agrees but the procedure quickly gets out of control and excruciatingly painful, bob opts out.

Bob starts to lose hope, and crawls home sobbing, seeking the companionship of gary for some comfort, to no avail as gary tentatively watches his favorite tv program.

Bob goes to sleep, wrecked with despair and misery.

Bob wakes up, it was just a dream.

>>78257169
Hilarity ensues

>>78257169
I like how his name just changes to Bob at the end.

>>78257219
>>78257266
The punchline is he was always known as Bob, but nobody cares about Bob, only Spongebob.

Mr. Krabs takes a shit and tries to sell it off as a new krabby patty dish

Mr. Krabs sexually harasses SpongeBob on the job.

Just the episode where Spongebob has bad breath, but this time its Patrick who has bad breath.

Spongebob crosses over with Uncle Grandpa for 15 minutes, it doesn't have a joke. The end.

What was that one long episode idea that was some kind of metaphor for bigotry and intolerance? Where Squidward gets caught up in some nazi-like campaign against sponges, and SpongeBob dies, but Squidward realizes the error of his ways and kills himself or something?

>>78257381
damn

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>>78256660

A "racism is bad" episode that panders to SJW's. The ideas is that in the Sponbebob universe, freshwater fish are picked on by ocean fish and Spongebob and Patrick learn that it's wrong to discriminate. The episode completely ignores the fact that freshwater fish will die when placed in saltwater and vice versa.

>>78257623
This is something Simpsons would do, not Spongebob

>>78256660
Maybe spongebob gets a cellphone, or...

rule 63 characters that came from another town

>>78257623
That's just the land creatures vs sea creatures episode

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>Squidward attempts to grow a pretentious garden
>Plays his clarinet for the garden as music helps
>everything in the garden is dead and sickly
>Squidward blames it on SpongeBob and Patrick making too much noise.
>Spongebob and Patrick grow their own garden for fun.
>Their garden is awesome
>Squidward had multiple mishaps trying to sabotage their garden
>In the end Spongebob and Patrick feel bad for Squidward and give him some vegetables from their garden
>He accepts and is happy finally.
>Vegetables were bad and give Squidward diarrhea

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>>78256747
Spongebob:
>I have aids
Audience dies in a fit of rage and laughter.

>>78257623
Didn't they already do something like that with Sandy?

>>78257773
>Patrick becomes noticeably sweaty and worried

>>78257773
>episode is resolved by wringing it out of him

>>78257861
Spongebob's aids runoff leaks into town water supply, hilarity ensues

>>78257741
This reminds me of classic Spongebob, like I could see it happening back then, except for the last line.
The last line reminds me of actual Spongebob.

>>78256969
That was a joke, but a bad one, I suppose.

Mr. Krab's daughter pearl is working at the Krusty Krab, she needs the extra money to buy a new shellphone.

Pearl does not work at all, spending all her time spewing random sonarnet gibberish which spongebob mistakes for orders, hilarity ensures.

After the mix-up has been solved, Pearl introduces Spongebob to the world of social media, she shows him the wonders of bassbook, spewtube, and bubblr

Spongebob amazed by technological wonder of the sonarnet, buys himself a shellphone and more hilarity ensures, falling for every angler bait and chum post, becoming a notorious chummer himself until he gets flamed off the sonarnet for his wanton debauchery.

At the end of the episode, he could not resist the temptation and goes browsing the sonarnet once again but this time finds a interesting site more suited for his shenanigans.

4chum

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Give Spongebob a son, who then appears in all subsequent episodes.

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>SpongeBob and Patrick find out they are fans of rival fishball (soccer) teams
>Shit talking ensues
>Whole episode is banter as they watch the game unfold
>Game ends in a tie
>Friendship wins

>>78257960
>Spongebob
>continuity of any kind
>immersion ruined.

Gary dies

>>78258052
>Gary dies
>Spongebob buys a new snail who is exactly like Gary in every way
>Gary is still dead

Lady Gaga passes through Bikini Bottom via train while on her way to a concert. Seeing how low the city's self-esteem is, she takes it upon herself to cheer up the whole city. However, no one in town is more depressed than Squidward, who was voted as the most unpopular employee by Mr Krabs. Squidward tries to reverse his status as one of the least popular fish in town by ghostwriting positive things about himself on the town newspaper under the heading "Truth Teller".

When Spongebob finds out her secret and reveals it to the town, his social ranking plummets to a new low until a psychic force tells Lady Gaga that Squidward needs her help immediately. After much soul searching and yelling at Lady Gaga for trying to help, Squidward realizes that his outburst helped him because he is finally expressing his anger instead of bottling it up inside him, in effect making Lady Gaga's mission successful. Squidward catches Lady Gaga just before she leaves town to apologize, and after being forgiven he and Lady Gaga perform a duet together. With Lady Gaga's assistance, Squidward and the entire town of Bikini Bottom realize that being oneself is better than being like anyone else. Just as Lady Gaga's train begins to leave again, Patrick runs up to her and asks if she can help him as well, but Lady Gaga declines, stating that she's not that good. As Patrick turns and walks across the train track, a second train hits him.

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>>78258052

>>78258052
Fuck, I would actually well up if this happened

Gary was my favorite character and "Have You Seen This Snail" is the only good post-movie episode

>>78257960
The problem with that is his son either becomes too things at the end, a much wackier and lolrandumb rendition of spongebob who escalates all hilarity to retarded levels or a moderate foil that falls somewhere between squidward and patrick who swings between the two.

Oh and the son will be the most hated character of them all.

>>78258069
When the fuck has new Spongebob ever relied on guest appearances?

>>78257991
>patrick begins to speak in an aussie accent

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>>78258107

>>78258107
Truth or Square

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Spongebob realizes life is pointless.

At least the voice actors still know how to have fun.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3p9Ayu-5zYY

>>78256660
What, and do the current writers' job for them?

>>78256660
Spongebob tries to get a cell phone but gets ahold of Denis Leary's cell phone during a golf tournament.

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>plankton plants a bomb inside a Krabby patty and spongebob accidentally eats it
>spongebob now has to horribly rip himself apart
>during the process he's shown to be in horrible pain and agony, tears rolling down his face as it gets redder
>spongebob is in gruesome pieces by the end of the episode

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Spongebob and Patrick spend the entire episode looking for something to watch on TV. It's just 11 minutes of random underwater TV shows.

>>78258444
It is wrong that I actually would like to see this episode?

These kind of parts are the best parts of Gravity Falls and Rick & Morty

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>>78258171
That was pretty funny, not gonna lie.

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Anyone else notice how the new episodes don't use Sandy hardly at all anymore?

>>78258560
It's because she's a shit character

Her S1-S3 episodes were boring as fuck

>>78256660
>Spongebob is at the bank when armed gunmen storm the building.
>hilarity ensues.
>Stray bullets hit Squidwards house, Killing him

>>78258578
The only good Sandy episode was probably the Prehibernation Week one.

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>>78258625
>he didn't like survival of the idiots
>he didn't like pressure

>Spongebob and Patrick play wrestling
>Mr. Krabs sees dollar signs
>Opens up Krusty Krab Pro Wrestling
>All the main cast and minor cast are wrestlers
>A whole bunch of interaction between characters like Larry The Lobster and Pearl or Mrs. Puff and Plankton, stuff you don't see often.
>No real plot, just some good character interaction and gags.

>>78258729
I really wanted GF to do something like that.

>>78256660
>Spongebob learns how to play soduku.
>Squidward gets a tentacle removed
>Patrick gets his GED
>Sandy ropes a sea cow named Ted
>Mr. Krabs loses a penny and accuses Squidward
>Gary was a Slug all along.
>Larry cracks his shell.
>Plankton steals a krabby patty but determines the grill has something to do with the secret forumalur.
>Pearl moves in with her new boyfriend Chet.
>Ms. Puff finally bans Spongebob from her school forever.

>Plankton is in a bout of depression over his constant failure of obtaining Mr Krabs's secret formula
>While banging his fists against the wall in frustration, he accidentally causes a bottle of chili paste to dump into the latest batch of chum
>Plankton takes a bite, leading him to quip that maybe he doesn't need the secret formula after all
>Cut to the Krusty Krab, completely empty
>Confused and outraged over his lack of customers, Krabs flips on his tv
>A lavish commercial for Plankton's Searacha Chum Bowl is on the air
>Krabs Squidward and Spongebob rush to the Chum Bucket, now filled with customers, with a line so long that it leads into Rock Bottom
>A montage of various failed attempts to get Plankton's recipe
>Krabs: "Well he may have me customers, but he'll never have me faithful crew! Right boys?...Boys?"
>Cut to Squidward and Spongebob working at the Chum Bucket, Sponge gleefully preparing searacha chum bowls while Squid expresses relief in being payed an actual wage
>Plankton gloats that he finally one-upped Krabs and how he didn't even need his formula to succeed
>Suddenly, the in-store TV shows a breaking news story about how the chum bowl is causing fish's bowels to explode
>All customers proceed to combust in the most grotesque way possible
>The Chum Bucket completely spills over with fish organs and debris
>Cut to the Krusty Krab, everything reverted to status quo
>"We may not have searacha, but at least our patties don't cause people to blow up!"
>Customers proceed to blow up

We gotta get spongebob back!

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>>78259068
I GOTTA GET SPONGEBOB BACK

>>78256995
I like it so much, I'll make the next 6 seasons all about it!

>Spongebob loses a shoe.
>Episode is him and Patrick dicking around the whole episode.
>End of episode, shoe was on wrong foot this whole time.

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>Sandy is doing karate
>she has human feet for some reason

>>78259026
That became dark very quickly anon. I can see how that can be play off as a joke though if you don't think too much about it.

>>78259026
This made me laugh

>>78258068
Let me guess, the snail's name is Lary?

>>78259198
There was a episode where Squidward ate too many krabby patties and exploded.

>Spongebob finds a whip and cracks it a few hundred times.
That's the episode, just that.

>>78258171
Tom Kenny dubbing Vito is the greatest thing ever

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>Spongebob acquires a taste for a brand new activity never before mentioned in the show
>Hilarity ensues

I can't. I can't come up with any... They've already used them all.

>>78256660
squidward could be forced into forming a makeshift marching band which will almost be ruined by spongebobs antics but it will work out in the end with everything coming together for no reason. No one will learn anything and squidward will wake up realizing it was a just a dream.

Any of these suggestions.

At night.

>>78259407
SOLD. Where do I send the check?

Patrick convinces spongebob to become a gimp.

>Episode starts with Mr. Krabs counting money
>Sees that all of his customers have these new collectible toys and are willing to spend ridiculous amounts of money to get them
>Decides to get in on the toy business too to make extra dosh
>Hilarity ensues
>Tries multiple times but can never hit the sweet spot that'll get anyone to buy his toys
>Gets obsessed with the toys and their success
>Eventually snaps and starts collecting all six fucktillion of them in order to discover their secret
>Spends all of his cash to collect them all but doesn't have enough
>Sells his house, his clothes, the Krabby Patty recipe, Pearl, even going as far as selling one of his organs to get every single one
>Cut to Mr. Krabs living in the now empty Krusty Krab surrounded by the toys and his own shitty, experimental products
>Babbles to himself on how to make his stuff marketable
>Spongebob enters to intervene
>Mr. Krabs breaks down into tears about how he just can't figure it out
>Spongebob says it's because they're made with love / fun to collect / *insert equally or more bullshit reason for why people buy them*
>Mr. Krabs responds with "Ooooh" and then the episode ends.

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>>78257845
>>78257861
>>78257923

>>78256742
Are you talking about something like that splinter episode? If so, fuck you for reminding me of that.

>>78256660
Squidward, needing to unwind, visits a random club that turns out to be a gay dance club. He's initially shocked, but loosens up and starts going there regularly to dance.

Until he runs into Patrick one night who's only there because he has a coupon for hot wings. Now Squidward has to do everything he can to keep his night life secret

>>78257592
>The punchline is he's Bob Belcher
>The twist is that this episode of Spongebob was airing on Adult Swim the entire time.

>>78256895
It isn't really creatively challenging to write modern Spongebob as you can write any random bullshit. Coming up with neo-Simpsons ideas is more entertaining.

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>>78257773
>I can't afford insurance Patrick, Bikini Bottom is going to let me die

[canned laughter]

>>78257623
It's funny how SpongeBob has a set of standards and the Simpsons don't

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>>78256660

Spongebob and Patrick become obsessed with waifu's. Meanwhile Squidward becomes gender fluid and a SJW.

Spongebob tries to pay off student loan debt.

>>78256660
Something something Plankton attempts to steal Krabby Patty.

>>78267583
Seeing as he can afford a two-story house, a pet and a ton of hobbies I doubt he'd have issues with that

>>78267583
He ends up killing Mr Krabs' mother and then is congratulated for it.

>>78258281
>obligatory "Hilarity ensues"

>>78256776
Han Solo at the end of the new Star Wars movie

A sponge falls in love with a squirrel.

Unable to confess, he is gifted with by a deus ex machina with the squirrel's phone number. Never minding the strange area code, he immediately calls her, and is overjoyed to find out that she has a crush on him as well.

But, the next day, when he recounts the previous day's confessions to the squirrel, she only looks at him with a perplexed expression. After some investigation, he finds out that the squirrel he called is not the same girl he fell in love with. In fact, she doesn't exist in this universe at all. She is the squirrel's alternate universe counterpart, who has fallen in love with the MC's own AU self, who too is blissfully unaware of her crush.

Hijinks ensue as the two strike up a deal to give each other their darkest, most private secrets in order to equip the other with the weapons they need to conquer the heart of their other selves. While the two chase their respective loved ones, DRAMA ensues as they begin to fall in love with each other instead and question the NATURE of LOVE.

>>78268624
I've seen this pasta a thousand times but is it from something real?

>>78256660
A squid named Squidler is elected president of Bikini Bottom and decides it's time to find a solution to the greedy crab problem. Mr. Krabs fearfully hides and asks SpongeBob and Squidward for help.

Hitler gets resurrected by Spongebob and becomes the new boss of Krusty Krabs

Spongebob gets into taxidermy and accidentally stuffs sandy

>Spongebob & Patrick are on their way to a Jellyfishing convention
>they annoy everyone on the bus and get kicked off
>they land in a lost civilization
>the savages think Spongebob is a god
>Patrick is a whipping boy
>the savages build a statue in Spongebob's honor and beat up Patrick because lolviolence
>Patrick breaks it with just a little tap
>the savages attack Patrick and Spongebob too for some reason
>suddenly a swarm of jellyfish attack
>Spongebob catches them in his net and stuffs them in a sack
>the savages catapult the sack and it lands in Squidward's house
>"NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL A VIKING-SIZED ADVENTURE!"

>>78258929
>Spongebob learns how to play soduku.
He plays it one time and never again
>Squidward gets a tentacle removed
It was just his "Baby tentacle" and a permanent one will grow back in a few weeks.
>Patrick gets his GED
His "Good Eats Degree" a reward for eating at the Krusty Krab every day for 14 years. The degree means nothing but Patrick flaunts it around like there's no tomorrow.
>Sandy ropes a sea cow named Ted
Ted gives a "sea cows are people too" speech
>Mr. Krabs loses a penny and accuses Squidward
Can You Spare a Penny?
>Gary was a Slug all along.
But he keeps wearing his shell because it's part of who he is.
>Larry cracks his shell.
He ignores the cracks until his shell explodes. Nothing else happens.
>Plankton steals a krabby patty but determines the grill has something to do with the secret forumalur.
He does nothing to change his plans, hoping that "essence of grill" will leak into the patty.
>Pearl moves in with her new boyfriend Chet.
It turns out Chet is an asshole and they break up. She moves in with a new boyfriend by the end of the episode.
>Ms. Puff finally bans Spongebob from her school forever.
Spongebob assumes she banned him because he finally got his license. He drives around Bikini Bottom illegally, thinking he'll be getting his license in the mail soon. After carnage (get it?) ensues, Ms. Puff is put on trial and is forced to keep him in her class until he's got his license.

Squidward has gender identity issues and tries to adapt as a woman

>Ms. Puff finally breaks down and beats Spongebob to near death.
>She's arrested, but Spongebob realizes that he was the cause of her mental instability.
>As a form of apology, he joins her in the asylum to keep her company.
Hilarity ensues.

>>78270666
>>Mr. Krabs loses a penny and accuses Squidward
What. wasn't this already done

>>78258578
no taste

>>78258167
This picture is antique,it was made when Spongebob and Emos were relevant

>>78259198
I remember the episode where dozen of fish were burned alive with oil in an accident at the olympics and then sold as food

An episode where Patrick starts regurgitating his own stomach on anything he perceives as edible, including Squidward.

>>78259407
didn't see that coming

>Squidward discovers tentacle rape porn on a japanese website and spends the rest of the episode repressing his newfound sexual desires.

>>78258729
I wish I could see a homage to WWE or WCW in there.
Something like...
>IT'S ME, MR. SQUIDWARD! IT'S ME, MR. SQUIDWARD. IT WAS ME ALL ALONG, MR. SQUIDWARD.

>>78269010
No, and that's the joke.

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>>78259068
good one patrick

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>>78269010
>>78272373
It's going to be Makoto Shinkai's new movie.

spongebob is arrested for public indecency
his friends then have to break him out

the hilarious ending? the entire thing is pinned on Mrs Puff!

>>78259068
We gotta get spongebob back faster than a dillrabbit on a hornpickle!

>>78256810
Cracked and keked

>>78267769
Gary pays the bills

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>>78257960
That would require our frilly little sponge to have a love interest, and the current writers don't like to use Sandy unless she's whoring out a new invention or being the smart bitch.

>>78273479
They really should have Sandy and Spongebob hook up. I've shipped them for years.

>>78258444
WAIT A SECOND why was Spongebob getting off to a sea anenome, he's a sponge.

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>>78273659
Both are in the same family. Matter of fact, a qt anemone would be a great gf for Spongebob, but Sandy should have won the sudbowl.

Spongebob gets his appendix removed and Plankton steals it and clones a new spongebob out of it to work at the Chum Bucket but the clone is useless because it's made out of a useless organ.

Actually I'd like that.

>spongebob and patrick get sent to a concentration camp
>hilarity ensues

>>78258107
David Bowie played that one guy in the atlantis episode

Make an episode where Krabs acknowledges Spongebob regenerative properties so he decides to sell his organs