What is the most cynical (animated) Christmas special ever?

>>77951688
How is that cynical? giving gifts is what selflessness and generosity are all about. cynicality would be 'fuck everyone, keep your presents to yourself' dumbass

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7qLbJUPC10

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>>77951688
Well the EEnE Christmas special had Eddy completely ignore the lesson he learned and steal everyone's gifts.

Does FoP's It's a Wonderful Life parody count? If so, then that one.

The latest TTG episode, where they wreak havoc around Santa's workshop and are rewarded anyway.

>>77951688
The American Dad specials are usually cynical as hell.

and fucking excellent.

Cynical christmas specials are such a cliché nowadays that the original Peanuts special seems straight out subversive.

>>77952858
>The Rapture happens
>Stan sacrifices himself to save Francine
>Goes to Heaven
>His own personal heaven lies beyond the door
>Enters
>[spoilers]He enters his house like at the beginning of the episode to celebrate Christmas with his family.[/spoiler]

>cynical

Pick one.

All of them. I can't imagine how terrible this shit must be for children who don't have extended families or even parents.

>>77953225
You think kids without parents/guardians will be watching cartoons?

>>77952771
Came here to say this

>"yeah, getting free shit is the only thing people care about on Christmas, fuck all this togetherness bullshit."

Teen Titans Go had an episode where the moral was exactly that.

>>77953112
That ones not cynical.
There's also the one with God which isn't either.

The only real Cynical one is probably the Krampus one which calls kids bratty little shits because Santa is in bed with Big Toy and has Krampus threaten to beat the shit out of them.

The rest are usually about how the Holidays aren't about superficial shit but Family.

Stroker and Hoop.

Santa is poisoned and dies a slow, painful death.
One of the protagonists doesn't give a shit and spends the episode drunk.
Santa's bloated corpse needs to be autopsied, starting with the brain.
The narrator is revealed to be a talking turkey, who futilely begs for his life before he is brutally beheaded.

>>77953690
Also Santa kills the three ghosts of Christmas after revealing he always hated them.

What about that Family Guy one from like 3 years ago?

>>77953749

And pumps their... ghost corpses? I guess? Full of lead long after they die. Uh, again.

>>77953785
That's actually not such a cynical ending but the last quarter is pretty dark up until the happy ending.

>>77952182
The context is that Dexter tried to hunt down Santa to prove that he doesn't exist.
>Dogfights him in a jet
>Destroys half his house
>Shaves an injured old man bald while berating him
>Tree is destroyed, presents are wrecked, Santa is hurt, Christmas is effectively ruined
>Family is pissed
>Dexter tries to appeal to their sense of togetherness in the spirit of the season
>They ain't having that shit
>"Oh, but then what IS Christmas all about?"
>Santa pipes up
>"The presents."
>THE END

Like, it's very clearly a joke, but if you take it at face value, it's pretty fucking cynical.

>>77953408

I don't understand. Why do people, adults even, like that pile of shit when it tries to directly piss off as many people as possible while still keeping a straight face?

>>77953515
>The only real Cynical one is probably the Krampus one which calls kids bratty little shits because Santa is in bed with Big Toy and has Krampus threaten to beat the shit out of them.

I guess the Santa part is kinda cynical, but American Dad Santa has ALWAYS been a bad guy and beating the shit out of kids is literally what Krampus exists for.

If you're good, Nicholas rewards your kindness with gifts of sweets. If you're bad, Krampus rolls up and beats your ass with a bundle of birch branches. If you're so much of a shit that not even a sound whooping will teach you your lesson, Krampus sticks you in a bag and takes you to his castle where you'll slave and toil until you learn not to be a bastard. Or die. Whichever comes first.

>>77953382
Why wouldn't they? Orphanages and foster homes don't get cable?

I'll take cynical "boo hoo, Christmas is a lie" whining over edgy "badass" whoreshit any day.

Fuck you, Morrison, you fucking hack.

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AT just had a holiday special where a character's father figure died, and he wound up killing his evil sibling that showed up posing as the dead father figure after crushing the remaining members of their society into a sentient immobile cube. As far as holidays specials go it had some interesting morals.

>>77953828
you don't know what cynical means at all do you

>>77953828
What's weird is that Dexter thought Santa was his dad during all of this. Why was he using his inventions to shoot him down when he wants to keep that shit secret?

>>77954255
eh. self-defense.

>>77954153
Are you talking about Klaus?

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There was this cartoon on Nick @ Nite back in the early 2000s called Fatherhood. It was directed by comedian/rapist Bill Cosby about an upper middle class black family that are one lip-tone shy away from being racist caricatures.

In the Christmas special the dad wanted some $300 fountain pen. The daughter got him a nice pen, but not THE nice pen. Meanwhile the daughter got an ugly sweater or something not even close to what she wanted and they said that it was the thought that counts.

The mom chastised the daughter for not getting the dad the $300 pen that he wanted. The daughter reminded her it was the thought that counts and the mom says something along the lines of "it's not okay when you do it". The daughter eventually caved and bought the dad the expensive pen he wanted.

Remember kids. If they don't get you exactly what you wanted, then you're ungrateful. But if you don't get them exactly what they wanted, then you're inconsiderate.

Do Objectivists celebrate Christmas at all.

>>77954543
Yes. That is the most retarded idea for a comic I've seen in a while. And considering Grayson and Starfire's ongoing exist, that's saying a lot.

Flapjack's christmas special.
"Soooo it doesn't really matter if you're been good or bad?"
"Nope... Pretty much everyone gets a present now."

>>77953028
Yeah, thats been a theme lately with just things in general. People used to laugh so much as the Adventure Time and Flapjack subverting childrens morals, but it's so common that when something like Harvey Beaks comes around, suddenly it's unique for being all around optimistic.

>>77954585
>Fatherhood

THANK GOD I WASN'T THE ONLY ONE WHO REMEMBERED THIS

Also

>comedian/rapist Bill Cospy

It's really conflicting watching his stand up now. The chocolate cake routine was golden, but...

Anyone else feel conflicted?

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>>77951688
Both Moral Orel Christmas specials

>>77953843
Some people have thicker skin than you.

>>77955927
I might be conflicted if I was retarded, but I'm not, sorry.

For some reason, I remember Squidward laughing about Spongebob crying at Christmas.

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Steven Univers-OH WAIT. CHRISTMAS IS /POL/ITICALLY INCORRECT ACCORDING TO LE EPIC SEMANTIC LEFT-WINGED RETARDS.

FUCK YOU REBECCA SUGAR.

Why is the modern animation industry so littered with so many fucking libertards/millenials?

>>77956465
That didn't sound forced at all.

>>77955927
Why feel conflicted? What does allegedly being a rapist have to do with his comedy?

>>77954631
>The Atlas Shrugged Christmas Special
>It's just John, Hank and Dagny sitting in an empty room refusing to give gifts or prepare any sort of holiday decorations.
>Someone tries to give them gifts and they refuse them
>Galt spends the next fifteen minutes monolouging his thoughts on christmas
>Eventually decide it's okay to receive gifts as long as you also give a gift and the gifts are of roughly equal value and the transaction fair.

>>77956648
>allegedly

It's pretty much undeniable at this point senpai.

>>77956717
Why?

>>77956733
There have been dozens of women speaking out about it, some with incredibly detailed accounts, and none of them are making any money or earning anything by stepping up. Also, he has never actually denied any of the claims, he just refuses to talk about it every time.

>>77953998
I thought the Krampus dragged naughty children off to Hell.

>>77956697
>Only 15 minutes

Try the next hour and a half.

>>77952182
Atheist much bro?

Cynical specials are boring.

Kick-ass action specials, now that's worth having a thread over.

Sam and Max
>Sam & Max spend Christmas with Sam's grandma at her maximum security prison on Blood Island. But the criminals attempt a jailbreak and the Freelance Police must round them up.

Men in Black
>It's up to MIB to save Christmas when Drekk kidnaps Santa Claus.

The Tick
>A small-time bank robber, dressed as Santa, is chased into an electric billboard, giving him miraculous powers to multiply, becoming the evil Multiple Santa.

Who else has some good ones?

>>77956465

I refuse believe this happened.

You could easily just make a secular "holidays" episode instead.

Or is that what they did, and you're mad that they didn't explicitly reference Jesus Christ?

>>77957842
There was a new years episode.

>>77957749
KND
Regular Show
Batman TAS
and I think Mighty Morphin Power Rangers

>>77951688
The new TTG

>>77952771
wait he already said it

It had a really nice song too
I still don't think TTG should exist

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>>77951688
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFgPicwIbf8
Road to North Pole of Family Guy.

>>77957966
KND did have a badass special. I forgot they even did one until just now.

>>77957749
Holy shit, I'm adding those to the rotation.

>>77957842
There haven't been any kind of holiday episodes really, aside from New Years fireworks.

Closest thing aside from that was the episode where they watch horror movies in a haunted lighthouse, but it's just a thing they're doing and Halloween is never mentioned.

I think one of the creators said on twitter that Christmas and Halloween don't exist in the show's alternate histroy setting in which Aliens invaded, blew each other up in a civil war, and then influenced the development of America to the point that they're on the money.

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>>77955927
One of my favorite musicians is a convicted murderer
Doesn't really matter

Here it is.

The best Christmas special of them all.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_U4cthFCLs

>>77958056
>I think one of the creators said on twitter that Christmas and Halloween don't exist in the show
See? It's the product of non-secularism. Why else would she explicitly avoid holiday episodes? To avoid offending people, of course! After all, the mention of CHRISTmas might trigger fedora atheists!

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>tfw Johnny Bravo had a christmas episode and flat out said "Christmas is about Jesus Christ, not commercialism"

B A S E D
A
S
E
D

>>77959137
But Steven is Jesus

>>77957749

Darkwing Duck
Pinky & The Brain
Justice League

that family guy one where all the elves are inbred and santa sings a song about how much he hates christmas

>>77959137
No atheist actually hates Christmas though. Step out of your /pol/ bubble for one second.

>>77959440
People call America puritan even though we censor Jesus for the benefit of fedoras and little shits getting free stuff.

>>77959742
Any atheist that celebrates Christmas is a piece of shit. I mean, why stop there? Why not celebrate Hanukah and Kwanza while you're at it, even more presents for you fucking heathens.

>>77959440
Are you referring to the special that ended with Johnny being rewarded with hundreds of gifts for doing the right thing?

>>77959863
Christmas is mostly a secular holiday anyway. Where in the bible does it say to watch Rankin Bass specials and hastily buy your friends gift cards at the last minute?

>>77959742
a bunch of atheists recently got butthurt that some school had a nativity skit in their after-hours completely volunteer holiday play and had a federal judge stop it

but the hanukkah, kwanzaa, and santa skits were 100% ok

>>77960000
Got a source that's not a chain email from your grandmother?

>>77960056
https://www.yahoo.com/parenting/judge-bans-students-from-performing-in-live-192232997.html

>>77953690
Stroker and Hoop doesn't even show up in 'cartoons only you remember' threads.

>>77960203
>>77960000
Yeah and the unabomber was Christan. What's your point?

>>77960000
>kwanzaa, and santa skits were 100% ok

To be fair, kwanzaa isn't a real holiday and Santa Claus is a corporate icon, not a religious one.

>>77960784
Damn, really? Just gonna throw the "Well THIS GUY that did THIS was Christian" out there? The fuck does that have to do with anything?

>>77960000
>>77960203
The school endorsing it is kind of lame. If it was just a Christian group renting out the auditorium as a venue, and the faculty didn't promote to students, I personally think that would be fine.

>>77960978
1. how were they endorsing it anymore than kwanzaa, hanukkah, or santaism

2. it's christmas. christ literally is the reason for the season. how can a one have a christmas celebration but ignore the cause?

>>77961056

>christ literally is the reason for the season

This is the reason for the holiday celebrations, you fucking idiot.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winter_solstice

>>77961115
Getting a little hot under the collar anon?

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>>77958253
You son of a bitch

>>77961056
Do you worship Thor or Saturn? Then why do you still call them Thursday and Saturday?

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>>77960203
>Annie Laurie Gaylor, co-president of the Freedom From Religion Foundation, tells Yahoo Parenting. The national organization joined the ACLU of Indiana in filing a lawsuit against Concord High School in Elkhart, Ind., on behalf of an unnamed, non-Christian family that complained about the religious scene. “It’s the kind of thing you’d expect in a Catholic school or private school or something out of the ’50s, but not today,” Gaylor says. “This had our jaws dropping.”

Are American atheists simply allergic to religion, Christianity especially? If I handed an atheist a crucifix, would it sear through their flesh and leave behind a cross-shaped hole? Would sprinkling them with holy water cause them to swell and grow boils?

And what if I recited verses out of, say, the Yasna or the Vendidad? Would it give them seizures?

>>77961056

Christmas is actually a loosely-assembled amalgamation of various winter solstice celebrations from different religions and beliefs. In fact, the only reason that Christ is even associated with it is because of the Roman holiday of Saturnus, wherein people would get totally shitfaced on wine and fuck in the streets to celebrate Saturn. The celebrations got so bad that the Church moved the date of Jesus' birth and told everyone not to party on the solstice because it would offend Christ.

>>77951688
When you become an adult, you'll realise that the true meaning of Christmas is the fucking hassle and financial expenditure of having to buy shit for people that they don't need or even really want, while they do the same for you, each secretly resenting it the while.

This thread sure took a turn

>>77953998
>>77953515

>If you're good, Nicholas rewards your kindness with gifts of sweets.
The Santa in the show had decided to give toys to kids regardless of whether they were good or bad, which turned them into brats and made him the villain of the episode.

It had more to do with how buying children with gifts spoils them, than with Christmas itself being commercial.

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>>77961309
yes, yes, winter solstice was why people celebrated 2000 years ago

but jesus has been it since then

>>77960934
I'm saying the acts of a few in a group don't make the majority of that group in the same boat as them.

>>77956465
ahahahahaha cry more faggot ahahahhahaha

>>77961396
Sure, man. Jesus or Christianity has never had any part in any Christmas celebration I've ever experienced, but there are lots of people out there who worship Jesus to varying extents, so you're not wrong. You might be overestimating kind of a lot when it comes to the modern world.

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>>77953112
So are all the episodes post-rapture just happening in Stan's heaven? That's bothered me for years.

>>77961396

Well... no. That's not entirely accurate. People celebrate it because its tradition. Like most of our holidays, they persisted because the Church was unable to get the people they were trying to spread their faith to to stop observing their own traditions so the Church simply incorporated those traditions into their dogma. So they were never really celebrating for Christ; Christ was largely ancillary to those traditions.

More to the point, in modern times Christ has taken a far backseat to commercial celebration. The season is about buying things now.

It's ironic, really. Christ muscled his way into the solstice celebrations and they became so popular that he was pushed back out.

Not unlike a butt plug.

>>77961673
Maybe. Who says the show is chronological? Or even that it focuses on the same timeline?

>>77961229
Because what they're based on doesn't matter. They're days of the week. Christmas is a religious holiday that's been appropriated by corporate america.

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>>77961750
> alternate timelines
Crisis on Infinite Stans needs to happen. Tearjerker Stan, Rapture Stan and Stan Prime need to team up.
> hot tub episode
I think you might be onto something, anon.

>>77952182
He made a point that it was only about the physical aspects of the presents themselves by rejecting Dexter's more metaphysical concepts.

Even at such a young age I was a bit taken aback by it.

>>77961673
Everything that doesn't make sense in American Dad is presumably a dream.

>>77956061
That doesn't answer his question.
Why watch a cartoon if it's not entertaining to anyone above the age of 14?

>>77961735
Well, Jesus took a backseat mostly because using him for commercial purposes would have been seen as blasphemous. After all, most of the cooler aspects of Santa have been picked from several other figures by artists and marketing departments.

I mean, just imagine baby Jesus drinking Coca Cola with some bears or telling you to buy some awesome new toys for your children.

>>77959440
This is the first time I realized that guy is carrying the same weapons the Terminator took to the police station in the first movie. Huh.

>>77961981

One could make the argument that Jesus took a backseat because of rapidly declining belief in the Christian faith, but whatever helps you sleep at night.

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>>77962140
christianity is at an all-time high number of believers and is the #1 religion in the world

>>77961758
It was appropriated by the Church to convert heathens, and then, as secularism took root (after the Reformation and Enlightenment and all that jazz), it remained a part of formerly pious societies.

"It was thing but now it's not" isn't really a great argument, because that's less a reflection of Christmas and more a reflection of the society of which it's a part. People still celebrate it because celebrating on that day is part of their culture, and the culture survives just fine without faith. Christians still celebrate Dia de Muertos, embalm their dead, and exchange wedding rings, despite not practicing any of the faiths in which those originated.

If you want to despair about Christianity losing traction, that's fine. But singling out Christmas is myopic and old hat.

>>77962140
There is a correlation, but the decline of Jesus as the main icon of Christmas started in the 50s, with the apparition of domestic tvs, and is present even in countries and states where Christianity remains strong.

>>77962140

doubtful

Christmas just became more secular which was inevitable no matter how you look at it

>>77962140
>rapidly declining belief in the Christian faith
Spoken like a true fedora. Try getting off the internet and seeing how many Christians are out there.

>>77962265
People calling themselves Christians isn't the same as actual Christians.

If we're going down that route then we might as well say all those self-proclaimed Muslims who are also homosexual peace-loving hippies are actual Muslims. Do they even Mecca?

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>>77963300

>>77961673
No because at the end Klaus is dead and mounted on the wall even though he's obviously alive post-Rapture's Delight. It's just a non-canonical (as much of a canon as AD has) episode.

>>77961673
that and the hot tub one are non-canon, remember that claus was dead in his personal heaven

then again its also a show within a show which is weird

>>77961314
I WISH my family was one of the families who "doesn't do gifts" nowadays. Last year was humiliating for me while my parents and their parents exchanged expensive gifts and all I had for EVERYONE (friends and family included) was a few little stocking stuffers I could afford. I feel like they went... unappreciated that year. I cried while wrapping the gifts because I knew they were so shit. :(

>>77955204
AT's Christmas special was pretty nice though.
After getting a bunch of DEEPEST LORE dumped onto them Finn and Jake are nice to the Ice King and they revive the spirit of Christmas by having a day where everyone hangs out around the fireplace sharing gifts.

>>77961673
In universe the whole show is just a tv show

>>77954585
Holy shit, I completely forgot about this show. And you managed t remember the entire plot of their Christmas episode.

Can this be found anywhere?

>>77959600

>Pinky & The Brain

I cried when I first read about the ending

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>>77952192
Disgusting

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>>77952235
Wonderful

>>77956766
They were all probably afraid of being called whores. Why the hell would they wait 60 fucking years later to report anything? And doing weird ass drugs was pretty standard during the 70's. Hell fucking Camille admitted that the women knew what the hell they were taking.

>>77964366
I never get anything for my family or even show up to christmas anymore and don't really feel bad about it. I'd really love to see my family, but I had a bit of a falling out with my brother and now I just can't handle family gatherings he's at and it's not even worth it to go just to see my non-immediate family. My aunts and uncles and grandparents have been getting me gifts since I was kid, back when obviously I didn't get them gifts myself. And now that I'm an adult I wouldn't even know how to go about giving them stuff for christmas and the whole thing feels really weird.

But the one really bad part is how every year in January, my grandmother starts calling me asking me when I'm going to come over to pick up the gifts everyone brought for me. And I know it was my own choice not to go to the party and I'm being a little bitch for complaining about free stuff, but the whole experience is really humiliating. Going down there, unwrapping gifts alone days or weeks after the party is over while my grandma just watches me, most of it is stuff I'm going to have to return or donate to charity because I don't have room for stuff I don't need... I really, really wish they'd just stop getting me stuff. I hate the sense of obligation behind it with no feeling, and I don't even feel as obligated as everyone else seems to.

Sorry for blogging. I get kind of stressed when it gets to be around this season.

>>77956465
Please stay in your containment board. That'd be nice.

>>77951688
PPG christmas special did basically the same thing.

>>77971197
Just tell grandma straight away to donate all that shit instead. Saves you a trip and emptiness.

>>77959440
It always stood out to me hearing them drop the J-bomb, even when I was ~6.

I wonder how it would have gone down if that first aired in this decade.

>>77972100
Too beta to confront my own grandmother. Also I'm convinced she wouldn't understand and would make a bigger thing of it, and that is the opposite of what I want.

>>77972115
>that first aired in this decade.

>UGGGGGGGHHHHHH LIKE OMG COULD YOU EVEN BE MORE OPPRESSIVE AND INSULTING TO MUSLIMS? FUCKING CHRISTIAN SHITLORDS SHOVING THEIR SEXIST, RACIST, HOMOPHOBIC RELIGION DOWN EVERYONE'S THROATS I MEAN IT IS 2015 CAN WE JUST NOT

>>77960383
I'm convinced I'm the only one on this planet that loved Stroker and Hoop

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>over a hundred replies
>no one brought up Miracle on Evergreen Terrace

>>77952858
That Krampus episode was absolutely awful and nearly made me stop watching tbqh.

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>>77957749
>Sam & Max spend Christmas with Sam's grandma at her maximum security prison on Blood Island. But the criminals attempt a jailbreak and the Freelance Police must round them up.
The real Christmas miracle is prison rape jokes in a children's cartoon.

The cartoon segment of the Star Wars Holiday Special

>>77974756

>"If these walls could talk!"
I remember this episode fondly

>>77974756
>"Don't open till Xmas" sign on his ass

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>>77974841
Too hot for children's TV

do the rankin bass specials have any sort of internal continuity?

>>77955927
Being a rapist doesn't make him any less funny. Do you dislike Wagner's music since he was an anti-Semite, even though he wrote some of the best music ever composed? Or do you just enjoy it for what it is, incredibly well made music?

Seriously, who made art doesn't matter. It's the art itself that counts. If you care at all about the actual artist for any reason other than context of the piece (Cosby's rapey adventures had nothing to do with his jokes, and Wagner's operas weren't particularly anti-Semitic, so it's not like they're part of the context) then you're doing it wrong.

>>77951688
I actually liked this episode.

Because come on, the one who says that Chrismas is about the presents is Santa Claus who is, you know, A MARKETING PLOY.