sucks how early yesterday's thread died early, I liked that discussion we were having about a hypothetical FOP fighting game starring all the girl characters, but I guess we can continue that topic here(since this has basically become the new general)
you are good Lopus, really good(and hopefully you'll do more smut for us today)
yeah he is good at that, although he often draws girls too skinny for my tastes, also gonna draw anything for us today AmigoDan?
>people still make posts which are essentially nothing but them going "look mom look at this shitty quality reaction image i found"
anything that anyone wants to talk about?
I haven't heard anything about this show since he got the dog.
Has anything happened since then? Why doesn't he just become friends with Crocker already? He's seen the fairies more than enough times.
either is good
that would be nice, to get more work done on that idea, let me link us to the old thread, where we discussed this before; http://archive.foolz.us/co/thread/63626974
>sucks how early yesterday's thread died early, I liked that discussion we were having about a hypothetical FOP fighting game starring all the girl characters
I'm pretty sure that's what killed the thread.
I don't think it was that, it was more that /co/ was really slow last night, that and yesterday's episode didn't bring any discussion with it(basically if anyone wanted to talk about something else all they had to do was say so)
I did this adult Tootie.
Real talk, did anyone else notice how many fetishes were just thrown around in Fairlyodd Parents?
My boyfriend claims he got his crossdressing fetish from the Timantha episode, and I'm sure the show played a part in developing my
I've noticed a few, like when Vicky became a musclegirl, or when she grew curves. All I know is that most of the fetishes in the show were applied to her.
And Timmantha is such a cutie. I love her.
Well, as I said, I noticed a lot of
diapercontent. There was definitely a lot of hypnosis/mind-changing stuff as well.
Thank god for Timmantha yo. Without her/him I maybe wouldn't have all these lovely pictures of my boyfriend all dressed up.
It was just a sketch anyway. It's still close to your design. Just different hair,and head shape. And yours got dem hips. I made it a few threads before you did.
you should do a drawing of an older Timmantha/Kimmy(cause they are basically interchangeable from a design standpoint), but then I feel you should do older designs for all the girls(cause you are good at it), I would especially love to see your interpretation of DLToon's near perfect older Vicky design(especially after Lopus' drawing of that design and your older Tootie design together)
pretty nice(although she'd look better with her glasses)
it might be like American Dad where certain episodes were written for an earlier season(and either shelved or rejected) and then animated to help fill out an order for a newer season
>thinking schools teach grammar mechanics properly
I didn't learn how to use commas properly until I was in college. Although, I might not have given a shit when grammar was being taught to me as a child, so it's probably my fault too.
I'm inclined to say Asian. It seems most cartoons try to use Asian VAs for Asian characters, even though being sticklers for racial accuracy matters least in this kind of situation.
I'd say mix personally
I tried it out. I wanna draw older tootie still being her stalker-y self. Just...older.
>btw i thought you hated tootie
That is news to me
oh btw anyone has links to the new episodes? I've seen some but not all
well 4chan autofilters my attempts to link it, so use the gravity falls decoder
cant recommend any of them though. maybe past and the furious if you want to see megan bacon.
it mostly has to do with his spotty english, and how it makes it hard to tell whether he's serious or not about the anti-Tootie stuff he's done lately(I'm pretty sure he's joking, but he should really be more clear about that)
also it's notable that two of my favorite smut artists are from Central/South America; Garabatoz who's Mexican I believe, and Reddyheart/Blackkheart who's from Brazil(now I want to see him do a FOP comic, cause it would be most excellent)
he's been getting a lot better with his english, but his tone is still kinda hard to read at times,
I'll admit as someone who legitimately has autism(albeit a very light case), I do sometimes have issues telling whether or not someone is being serious about something)
any particular reason you don't think highly of him?
I'm not a huge fan of his latest works either to be quite honest. I'd rather see him just draw sexy Tootie than involve her in all this shipping drama. It's no more endearing than hearing any troll autist here shout her down about being a stalker. I won't get to into it though, because the One Man Tootie Hating Army here will completely skullfuck this thread otherwise.
Well, as far as I can remember, Fairly OddParents threads have always been somewhat popular here. There was the Sherwood comic for one, and the show itself has a constant supply of smut material. And like it or hating it, the romantic plots do provide plenty of interesting ideas. Maybe the past year or so, all of our threads were being deleted because of some convoluted troll story, which had to be one of the most pointless and time-wasting "fights" I've seen the mods here put up. We probably missed a great deal of discussion when it comes to things like Sparky or Missy being added to the show.
someone should show him AmigoDan's design and see if he'd want to draw it as well
a little too on the nose
yeah FOP is perfect for smut purposes for a ton of reasons
this is one of my favorite all time FOP pictures
makes me mad that
1. that movie wasnt animated
2. dlt doesnt do much tootie
and most of all 3. the show is finally in HD and tootie probably wont appear all season
I appreciate that people are finally drawing Tootie with a heavy bottom. For some reason, it makes the most sense with her name and all. Tootie Bootie. Some behind-view shots oughta be perfect.
For some reason, all of the MILFification artwork of her I've seen just gives her big tits and hair and nothing else. I'm okay with this, but ass all the way.
worried about overexposure for the design or is it something to do with Gara himself?(I'm suggesting it due to it being the best adult Tootie design we currently have, and it's a hell of a lot better than the design Gara is currently using for her[seriously it's bland as hell considering it's just her show look but taller and with some tits added])
One last late night Tootie
The Double Dimma-Digits of getting that Dimma-Dick
I don't want to put any pressure on the artists here, but I wouldn't mind seeing some of them try designing a 21 year old Trixie and Veronica
Redwood's attack dog? Oh well don't worry about them. Now that HSG and Frozen have been banned, they have that much fewer places to camp out in.
Now they just need to ban ATG and we's be free.
High Impact Sexual Violence(that is really good Yoto)
it'd be nice to see older designs for them too
>im out too, im getting the sense a certain little shit has returned to the thread.
what does that mean?
Missed this one.
Well, not the overexposure tbh. So yeah, it's about the artist. But I don't want to derail the thread with details, there's work to do
I wish she was on more episodes.
yep, gonna step out of this thread as well. Great pics Yoto
Vicky, Tootie, Trixie, and Veronica got to Timmy Island.
yea im not sure about this one dude.
a poof era shit like that should NOT be allowed to strike original season royalty without losing a hand.
well enough about the enemy back to talking about FOP
yeah Mandie is pretty neat
could we please stop talking about this, it's boring and not important to the thread right now
the idea I had(although this is more for smut reasons) was that after being beaten by Timmy so many times, she's come to believe that he's the universe's greatest warrior, and returns to Earth to make him hers
again please stop talking about this
we get that now please shut up about it, I'm not trying to be rude but you guys talking about this and nothing else is ruining the freaking thread
But there are still some of them left.
Now, for that Yoto's Tootie... Here. She was fun to draw.
very nice AmigoDan, although as nice as Yoto's design is, yours is definitely still best(it captures Tootie's essence better)
Thanks, Yoto created this version of Tootie.
I really like it.
Thank you, Kooky, tbh I like them all equally.
But I still owe you guys a lewd. And I'm kinda eager to draw a mini-comic of her too
but knowing me, I don't know if I'll actually do it
It could be normal Tootie traveling in time and meeting her future self, hilarity ensues.
Thanks, Satan! I hope it lasts too.
If you do decide to make a comic. I'd recommend young Tootie lovingly chasing after a frightened Timmy in the first panel, then a time card that says Ten Years later for the second panel, and finally a lovestruck adult Timmy chasing after adult Tootie.
so with this comic idea, what would Adult Timmy's design be like?(personally my preference is at a halfway point between his LA look and his appearance as Gah, leaning slightly closer towards the Gah end of the spectrum)
Eh just Timmy but taller and lankier and with a little longer hair. I'm not a fan of Gah.
yeah DLToon's rendition is fairly close towards how I'd have it(although I wouldn't mind him being a bit beefier, especially since outside of the LA movies, Timmy's been pretty consistently shown as being pretty big as an adult[not counting the time he wished himself into his 40's in the first season])
Nice one. I don't think I've ever seen that one.
While I have said that I'm not too sold on the Fighter Tootie concept, I must say that I do love the design. Very Julia Chang-like.
>Tootie suddenly wanting to become a street fighter
Yeah, I get that. The idea stems from Timmy saving her from Francis in "Kung Timmy," and a theory that Tootie would want to return the favor so she could win his heart.
I'm beginning to question the criteria by which fairies are assigned. Timmy got his fairies because he was tortured by Vicky. Crocker and Remy got fairies because one or both of their parents were MIA. How does that explain Megan Bacon? Why doesn't Chester have a godparent? (Single parent and poor.)
I wouldn't be surprised if one of the criteria to get a Fairy Godparent is to have at least some potential to keep them a secret(and even then most of them seem to blow it within a month of getting their Fairies), which is why Tootie never got ones of her own(the episode where Timmy loaned Tootie, Cosmo and Wanda, showed her to be completely unable to keep her mouth shut on her own about them)
also anyone notice that that having a Fairy Godparent seems almost pointless, most kids blow it withing a month of getting them, and even the few who keep them for a significant amount of time will eventually lose them and all memory and evidence of their time together, probably leaving giant holes in their memories as well as massive psychological scarring(I noticed a similar problem in KND where the idea of Decommissioning a KND agent upon turning 13 seemed to cause more problems then it ever solved), although this is probably supposed to be one of those things you aren't supposed to think about
Reminds me that Simon said his Trixie and Vicky comics were how the characters retroactively remember the events of "The Boy Who Would Be Queen" and "Love at First Height" after Timmy loses his fairies.
I hope yesterday's incident didn't scare them off
It'll probably deal with Timmy losing his fairies for good
I'd rather see more of Megan or Missy now, since we'll probably never see them again, just like Molly, Tammy, Marianne, girl in the kangaroo pouch, Timantha, Doombringer, Carly, Golden Locks/Hair Raiser, BRAT, Happy Betty, the cowgirl in the Christmas episode, et cetera, ad nausea.
Seize the moment while they're still fresh.
I like to think that Da Rulez are actually pretty light regarding sex as most godkids are too young to wish for anything like that(and very few of them get old enough and still have fairies for this to be a problem either)
true but we shouldn't discard the mainstays either, they all need Timmy's Dimma-Dick
The moment a child begins to entertain those ideas, he would no longer be a child at heart, which is more important than the actual age as per the first season 1 episode. This ties into the live action movie, where Timmy was supposed to lose his fairies by experiencing "true love." Since he was in love with Trixie and then Missy, I think we can read between the lines a little and say that true love refers to consummation, or at least the possibility of it.
personally I ignore the LA movies and any episodes after Poof was introduced when it comes to Da Rulez and any changes or additions made to them(really the only thing I take from those are any new characters introduced in them), it's pretty much the only way to have remotely any internal consistency with the setting(as after Poof was introduced they very quickly throw out what little consistency they had)
also I believe neither sexuality or romantic love has much to do with mental maturity
Even disregarding the LA movie, it seems the fairies define children by their innocence rather than an arbitrary number. They serve only children. Wanting to pork your fairy is quite an unchild-like thing to ask.
Do you really think the show would even allow for this possibility? This is pure out of character fanfic/headcannon fodder.
Well would you both be open for suggestions?
How do you think the women in FoP would be during sexc times?
Probably obsessive I guess? Would swallow?
No fucking idea. Maybe she'd shove her wand up your rectum.
Probably likes foreplay involving melted chocolate on the body. Some girls love that, and we know Wanda freaking loves chocolate.
Princess ManDie would demand dirty talk during the whole thing and she totally likes it real rough, maybe the strongest forms of BDSM. Not even Vicky would get to ManDie's levels.
Especially if it involves tentacles or similar stuff.
Oh shit nigga what am I doing?
Might of killed 2 birds with one stone.
No i don't know what her legs are doing
would love to see your interpretation of DLToon's version of Vicky >>63676926 that or maybe an adult design for Trixie and/or Veronica(maybe have Trixie wear a slightly more modest version of this outfit)
here's how I'd do it;
Tootie: affectionate with a strange mix of domination and submission
Vicky: very wild with some mild BDSM tendencies
Trixie Tang: kinda selfish about her own pleasure, but surprisingly submissive
Veronica: if Timmy or Trixie is involved will be willing to do almost anything(also really into anal)
Missy: surprisingly masochistic in the bedroom
Molly: prefers it very gentle(and has tickling kink)
Carly: pretty vanilla overall, but very skilled at it
Timmantha: extremely bashful but once she gets going will go for hours
Mandie: High Impact Sexual Violence(seriously though she's a major Sadomasochist, although she'll never seriously injure someone)
Megan Bacon: very into foodplay
Mrs Turner: name a non-scat sexual act and she's done it with Mr Turner before
Ms Waxleplax: has a preference for non-vaginal sex, especially oral
Wanda: is very dominant in the bedroom, yet in a very affectionate way
Cosma: submissive due to not being very bright(she lets others make decisions in the bedroom)
Blonda: very similar to Wanda, although she's more blunt about it
good job Yoto
>Veronica: if Timmy or Trixie is involved will be willing to do almost anything(also really into anal)
Why? Have I missed something in FOP recently? I haven't watched any new episodes in like 3 years.
genderbent Cosmo(since I was including Timmantha, I figured I should include Cosma as well)
there probably is, although that's not my bag
really nice work Yoto
Can you draw Tootie and Timmy in the nude after Tootie "accidentally" lost all their clothes when they were swimming? If you aren't confident enough with drawing their private parts, how about having them conveniently censored
Thank you, and you're right.
Excellently done friend. I can't believe I never knew of your work until this thread.
You captured her look down spectacularly. I wouldn't mind seeing her and Tootie together with one sister jealous of the others beauty
this is very nice
anyone done coloring of these for you?
i used to but im rusty
Maybe next time. Here's my last image of the night.
My headcanon is that tootie and vicky started getting along after vicky realized how uncomfortable tootie makes Timmy.
she also uses being a sister in law as an excuse to come over and ruin his life
I keep forgetting the pics! I really am tired. haha
Loses her mind in her excitement, practically rapes him
At first is surprisingly awkward because she doesn't have any experience; after a little while she becomes more of a dom
Dispassionate and emotionless
Eager to please but awkward due to no experience
The DLT's design I posted there is 19 years old.
btw guys, if I don't post much today or tomorrow it's because
I'll be attending an event that lasts 2 days..
Agreed. Especially if we're going with the idea of having the girls know about Timmy's fairies
I have a related request. I can't find the picture in this collage of Vicky with the cup of coffee. Most are either from the show, are can be found quickly in Google image, but that one specifically I can't place.
Bon voyage. And don't forget when you're done with the crime scene- err um, event: always bleach.
So Gara admits to liking Megan but he prefers her kid self over her adult self.
Would this satisfy you for now?
Good thread, I wish I had more time and energy to contribute. Still, I had to squeeze in this. I might overhaul the designs in the future if I choose to draw a proper picture with Vicky in her 30s and Tootie in her 20s. I gave Vicky the classic Humphrey Bogart detective outfight because I'm a sucker for classic Hollywood and I have no imagination.
BTW, good job with these:
>>63686489 (I especially like the design here)
While I'm happy you keep referring to that particular adult Vicky design as mine, I have to give partial credit to Sniper Tomcat who chose the colours for her and also did some tweaks for the design.
Also, the adult Timmy design for >>63684765 was originally supposed to be even scrawnier and Tootie looked much more like her live-action version (i.e. she didn't have glasses).
I still like Gara and I believe that everyone in this thread is awesome.
That's all I have to say at the moment.
yup, although if we want Wanda to get involved with the Timmy happy sex times, something would have to be done about Cosmo(as I despise NTR), which is why I've suggested having him get permanently get genderbent before,(this happens due to Cosmo saying something extremely sexist against Wanda, to where even Timmy finds it wrong, so as punishment Cosmo gets some time as a girl, which partially backfires due to Cosmo/Cosma finding out she prefers being a girl[part of this being due to getting some rather nice Lesbian sex from Wanda], and so decides to stay one)
well if we want to include Mrs Turner in the Timmy Dicklympics, like with Wanda something has to be done about her spouse(and since we can't magic a solution like with Cosmo, I suggest having Mr & Mrs Turner get divorced, after Mr Turner ignores his wife one time too many in his pursuit of his mostly onesided rivalry with Dinkleberg[I'm of the opinion that while their marriage is mostly stable, all it'd take to start falling apart would be one or two major incidents where Timmy can't magically fix things], also it's kinda odd how I have no problem with fictional consensual incest but can't stand NTR)
don't forget the Club Soda
Gara's fine for the most part but like many Tumblr artists his tendency to not answer a question straight on is getting a little old(I've noticed SLB doing this as well)
very nice DLToon
damn very nice Yoto(also if it weren't a horribly sexist term, Semen Demon would be a good description of your Tootie)
yeah I'd say mine is closer >>63715386
I'll admit that's a possibility, but I'll also admit I don't like multiple guys in my smut either(also I like the Cosma design and feel it could use more love)
>the writers remembed AJ, Chester, and Sanjay exist
>the animators forgot how to draw Sanjay
>the two or three words that come out of AJ and Chester's mouths are clearly not in their voices
but anon nobody cares about those characters, kids want to laugh at mr. crocker being dressed up by his mom or timmy's dad and cosmo having a screaming competition
Sure. But I must admit. I'm not Super into the Vicky/Timmy stuff so....
drawfriends in the FOP threads have been going hard these past few days. fucking love you guys.
this new season has SUCKED though, and i mean every one of the episodes ive caught has some glaring and obvious flaws in its production. vicky's acting episode is the last chance they have to redeem themselves.
I could see Vicky after yet another horrid date(she's not the best judge when it comes to men) drowning her sorrows in booze at Tootie's apartment, having a total spit-take when Tootie offers her nonchalantly the possibility of having a threesome with her and Timmy(and Vicky having to think very hard on this, as she hasn't had any in forever, and as much as she'd like to deny it, Timmy is looking pretty delectable lately)
16 hrs 34 min and 18 sec to be exact, before auto-sage comes in & slaps us right in the nards
Couldn't help but put Tootie in it. I have a very obvious preference.
Thank you, I'm really glad you like them.
And I'm digging these designs as well.
Vicky sorta reminds me of Dexter's mom with that haircut, btw.
Great stuff as usual, Yoto. And
lolat that drunk dialogue.
I have no excuse. I just got lazy.
I think even Timmy realizes that it's better to stay away from tootie's insatiable sexual appitite every now and then.
nice job Yoto
it helps though that Timmy has a pretty large sexual appetite as well, so he only needs to express caution occaisionally
Ah man. I wanna draw but I feel like I'm running out of steam and the quality is slipping.
Naw...My headcanon is Tootie is Tommy and Tammy's mom
which makes sense since this headcannon also involves Tootie banging Timmy all day every day forever. He's looking at grown up Trixie. Who's there for some Raisin.
well Chester and AJ are busy at work(AJ's a scientist, and Chester's a sports journalist), Sanjay is in the military(takes after his step-dad) and no one's heard from Elmer in years...
meanwhile every female friend of the Turners was available for the party, along with Aunt Vicky and Granny Turner(unbeknownst to Tommy his Dad is about to get the ever living crap snu-snued out of him)
That explains the hat. I like this.
Posting an oldie. Man, I really need to dust off my tablet and draw something.
Have you seen BlueJr's Tootie/Trixie friendship pics? Pretty good stuff.
>Granny Turner(unbeknownst to Tommy his Dad is about to get the ever living crap snu-snued out of him)
You just made me picture GMILF Mighty Mom snu-snuing her own son.
Nah, that's just me being a perv.
If Wanda did join the fun. Would she prefer to be fucked as a fairy or as a human woman?
that's a possibility, since I imagine Mrs Turner being the kind of woman who ages like a fine wine(either that or she's there to take the kids to get ice cream and keep them busy while the other girls shatter her son's pelvis[depending on how you feel about incest])
depends on whether they need to keep the whole fairies thing secret(although I imagine even as a human she'd be somewhat on the short side, same with Cosma, and Blonda)
BlueJr is a pretty good artist
legally Timmy Turner is married only to Tootie, unofficially the rest of the girls live very closely and are often "Visiting" at all sorts of times(as far as Tommy and Tammy know the other girls are their aunts like Vicky is)
Tootie is very proud of her husband's sexual prowess, and is glad to be able to proselytize the creed of Timmy Dong to others
I could imagine that to an extent(although that brings up the issue of whether or not Fairies even have genitalia, considering how Fairy pregnancy works)
>[depending on how you feel about incest]
I don't have much of a problem with it in fictional cases. In this case, the whyboner part comes from the ages; if there's gonna be incestuous snu-snu, I'd prefer it to be /ss/.
while I ignore the episode where Timmy halted time for 50 years(since it's extremely stupid), I do like to think that Timmy's made enough wishes relating to time that the aging of those close to him are a tad screwy(so Mrs Turner has for all intents and purposes only aged like a year or two's worth since the time of the show, and Vicky's aging is starting to slow down as well[as well as the other girls who are notably older than Timmy and Tootie])
also I like to think that while the rest of him looks his age, his face is still very boyish in appearance(and he's rather lacking in body hair)
Well... okay, then.
No offense, man, but sometimes the amount of thought you put into this stuff is a little overwhelming.
none taken as I've mentioned before I have WAY too much time on my hands(am unemployed, and not going to college right now) so I'll often have hours of uninterrupted time to think about this sort of thing, also I'm one of those people who love to world build, even for fanfiction, even if nothing ever comes of it(in many respects I've been thinking up fanfiction since I was 8 and came up with a very complex story involving Venom becoming a good guy)
Agreed. And it's not like she's not packing anything under that sweater.
Adding another thing to add to my AU
Tootie marries Timmy and since Timmy gets to keep his Fairies through breakin' Da' Rules, Tootie is now technically a Godkid now too. She abuses this power
Definitely a fan of this headcanon. BTW do you mind giving away your tumblr account in case this thread doesn't make it through the night? I don't want these amazing pieces of yours to be lost for good.
yup that sounds about right(also wonderful pic, you can really tell Timmy has very conflicting feelings regarding Tootie doing this kinda thing)
Last one of the night. Based on the Light's Out episode...also the Squirly Puffs episode.
It starts after "Kung Timmy." After Timmy saves her, she gets it in her head that if she returns the favor, Timmy would fall for her. It was also the day when she found all her lost Timmy stuff in Vicky's room. That didn't end well, and Tootie decided to stand up for herself.
She researched Karate and trained in secrecy to avoid her sister's wrath. Her success was limited, but she felt confident that one day, she'd overcome Vicky and win over Timmy.
A couple of years later, her parents and Vicky were tired of her Timmy obsession, and sent her to a boarding school so she could be more productive. She got a little depressed, and the bullies got to her, she started lashing out, nearly getting expelled.
The headmaster offered her a fighting instructor if she could keep her hands to herself for a month. She makes it, but training was nothing she expected it to be, certainly not as easy. She soon got her sensei's respect, however, and helped her grow stronger.
Back in Dimmsdale, she becomes more aware of magic when she meditates, and pinpoints Timmy as the cause of most of it. Timmy's living with his human godparents after an incident with Vicky.
Meanwhile, as Tootie grows older, she struggles with her crush on Timmy, develops her own fighting style of Ballet and Karate, and starts earning respect from her peers.
She gets her brown belt at sixteen, and she she gets rewarded with a party. Someone crashes it, outfights Tootie, and leaves her bloodied and bruised. She falls into a coma, and wakes up in the hospital. Her mother worries more about Tootie's mental health than physical health, thanks to the trauma of the beatings. Even Vicky shows up, saying that Tootie should stop with her martial arts. In the end, though, Tootie stays her course and trains harder.
I've never been good at humor, and I live with depression, so that might have contributed to the mood.
Tootie's outfit is a modified version of her boarding school uniform. Her purple hair is a sign of her "rebellion." She sees her younger self as weak and helpless. Her outlook on life is pretty good, though.
And Julia just happens to be one of my fighting game waifus, so equating that to Fighter Tootie is a compliment.
the idea of cheap yet good quality commissions is extremely tempting, I might hit you up in the future when I get some more money...
Yep, DLT always does the best FOP
>Nothings been the same since Butch came back to the show and most of the female V.A's ether quit or were fired...Any truth to that /co/?
I stopped watching the show after season three, only to crack open the door for plot important episodes...but since the new blonde showed up it's like the episodes are on LOCK DOWN or something, I can't find them streaming at all anymore online since I won't be able to use my friend's P.C for at least a LONG while...
>you can really tell Timmy has very conflicting feelings regarding Tootie doing this kinda thing
I can see this turning into a bit of a competition, with Timmy and Tootie each wishing up more and more bizarre changes for the other, trying to outdo each other in creativity.
Well, it'd start out with small stuff like >>63746552, then go to more extreme sizes, then more and more strange and unusual changes and transformations until they're both utterly bizarre monstrosi/d/s.
Whoever is declared the winner gets to top.
what a wonderfully perverse idea, I love it(woe to anyone else who gets caught in the crossfire of this bizarro sex fight)