>cooking dinner for GF tonight
>nice porterhouse cut, some chicken kebabs, and a feta and cherry tomato salad, wedges basic stuff
>never seen her eat a full steak so pretty excited to cook one for her
>I'm very good at steak though
>prepare the cuts with rosemary, pepper, onion glaze
>prepare dressing for salad - start heating a salt rock on the bbq for the steak (takes half an hour)
>cook everything myself, alternating between the oven, the salad and the BBQ outside
>finally everything is done (steak is a perfect medium rare and smells divine)
>ask GF to help set the outside table
>she gets pissy because she is watching some SUPER IMPORTANT vine compilation of some fat bitch who screeches retard noises
>Fine, I'll do everything myself
>hesitates for ages
>get into an argument since setting the table while I'm dishing up is a super simple fucking thing to do
>she gets pissy
>after much aggravation everything is served up on plates
>she starts to eat, hesitates, goes inside and comes outside with a bottle of ketchup
>figure its for the potato wedges, fair enough
>she INSTANTLY covers the steak in ketchup, like a fucking LAKE OF KETCHUP
>I'm just completely aghast
>she hadn't even tried to taste it first
>it was a fucking great steak
>perfect, even
>she wolfs down the salad like an infant
>I say 'what the fuck, you have just spoiled everything'
>She says 'fuck this' and goes inside with her food and slams the door
Should I feel insulted? I feel like she was massively in the wrong, rude, uncooperative and disrespectful.
For context she sometimes cooks pasta. I do the lions share of the cooking most of the time and its usually more complex/expensive stuff.
What do you think?
Dump her you idiot. I mean jesus Christ. That's an insta-dump.
Fucking dump her. Now. Send the text.
>>8494270
Seems a little bit harsh
I haven't spoken to her since, it's been maybe half an hour
>>8494271
If the sex game is not full of filthy shit like anal and rimming, dump her ass.
>>8494253
>she INSTANTLY covers the steak in ketchup, like a fucking LAKE OF KETCHUP
>what the fuck, you have just spoiled everything
>>8494271
She sounds like a piece of shit
>>8494271
Do you have no self respect or something? Stop being a fucking beta.
>>8494275
word. She got shit taste anyway.
As long as this is a blog post thread, let me give you some personal insight on the matter OP.
I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant.
She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit cook. I wouldn't even mind eating shit food if she at least made it on time. But she rarely did.
We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great.
But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she get drunk, neglect the kids, and made me top Ramen for dinner, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out and have dinner together. I drove maybe 3 blocks to a quiet area (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a quiet field) and I got out of the car, went around like I was going to open her door for her and let her out, and I just beat the shit out of her while she was still seatbelted. After a few punches, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I beat the shit out of her again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my cellphone and dialed her mom's number on the drive home. I made her talk to her mom, while daring her to fucking say something.
Before that incident, I had never laid a hand on her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to lay hands on you."
All my meals have been on time, and she just recently tried to make a meatloaf. It was mediocre, but I was just thrilled that she tried.
Do with this information what you will.
>>8494303
Reminder that OP isn't married to this girl and probably doesn't have kids with her, and thus won't have to resort to your psychopathic behavior
>>8494303
whoa ok this is pretty insane
>>8494303
That was a very exciting read. If it's not made up, consider writing more dead-pan stuff.
>>8494303
Real men like you are a rare breed.
She should consider herself lucky to be married to a man, not a nu-male beta-cuck.
>>8494328
>not wanting to pay shitloads in alimony and court fees when she inevitably sues you for domestic abuse
Yeah boy howdy us city folk sure are cucks!
>>8494311
When I first started my reply, it was going to be geared towards telling him that it isn't worth staying with a person you can't get along with. Then I just fucking spaghettied all over the place and admitted to what I'm pretty sure is a felony. Either way, you're right. Hopefully OP doesn't get her pregnant. But if he does, I hope he has been given some good advice in life.
>>8494335
OP here
I appreciate the advice. I don't think she would be as bad (she can do a lot more than top ramen, for instance) but at least she aint pregnant.
I just went out and had a look, she ate everything at least. Probably not worth a 'special drive' and a black eye.
I'll get over it, maybe I'm just too autistic about steak.
>>8494334
>thinking everyone is American just because /ck/ is filled to the brim with fast-food and hot dog threads
Parents are from the Balkans. I'll have you know that the age old tradition of spanking your children and keeping the woman in check has kept me well disciplined and the countries divorce rate at 11%.
I'm sure you 'city folk' are quite content with the 54% divorce rate and cuckoldry going on right now.
>>8494352
>assuming I live in the city
>assuming I live in America
Rural Australia FWIW
You don't need to beat a fucking woman to earn respect. The threat of leaving along with your wallet will be enough for most women.
>>8494349
It's about the lack of giving a fuck.
If you made soup and she salted it before trying it, I'd give her a field visit.
Unless of course it's because she's a complete retard in which case you can probably do better.
>>8494352
>shitty wife
>beat her
>shitty kids
>beat them
>shitty husband
>
>>8494253
Jesus Christ mate sounds like you're dating an absolute cunt.
>>8494303
None of these things happened
>>8494253
This is probably out of context and you aren't telling us what a prick you also are.
>>8494253
you need to talk to her and make peace.
>>8494349
You're putting the blame on yourself even though she was acting like a complete child. If you don't nip this sort of behaviour in the bud early on you'll end up as her doormat.
>>8494402
Are you female or just a gayfag?
>>8494438
>gayfag
makes sense in context but I still got a kick out of it
>>8494271
This girl can't even appreciate a good steak. Dump her. Also, sterilize her in her sleep, god forbid if she starts to breed.
>>8494253
You are in a relationship with a selfish cow who has a child's palate. Dump her and stop being such a giant fucking waste of perfectly good oxygen.
>>8494394
off to die in a war
>>8494488
I don't think they have any policies involving conscripting just bad husbands
>>8494303
I'm so hard right now
>>8494253
You seem like a boring cuck who try to force your shitty hobby on everyone.
Just don't cook for her you damn retard. Don't do over complicated stuff to show off. Just do some mac and cheese for her (if you absolutely want to cook for her) and whatever the fuck you want for you.
>Muh I'm a great cook
>>8494253
Things that never happened? And assuming this really did happen (doubtful) then you're a bitch for allowing her to use fucking vine-compilations as an excuse.
>>8494359
I completely agree.
It's obvious she's really depressed, or else she'd actually try at life.
>>8494303
Help her set goals and live by a schedule. Aimless housewives get sad and unproductive real quick anon.
>>8494253
I would have dumped her a long time ago.
>>8494303
>married "highschool love"
>needs to beat his wife in order to be respected
>self-identifies as a real man
neck yourself. never laid hand on a woman and still don't get an iota of disrespect. you're pathetic and I feel fucking sorry for you.
your life sounds like if the "just fuck my shit up" meme was taken too far.
Kick her the fuck out of your house and never talk to her again.
>>8494303
It seems wrong to do it, but when you think about it, it probably made her think about how much of a bitch and how lazy was she.
>>8494253
Dump her
>>8494303
How did you get access to a computer from 1950?
>>8494253
> GF
> I GOT A GIRLFRIEND DUDERINOS!
> DID YOU GET THAT?
> I STARTED MY THREAD WITH THAT MEME WORD SPECIFICALLY SO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW COOL I AM
> DID I DESERVE YOUR VALIDATION YET?
> CAN I BE CONTENT WITH MYSELF NOW? I PROMISE IT'S TRUE I GOT A GIRLFRIEND
> I REALLY HAVE SEX, MY DICK GETS WET HAHAHA
> I'M SO FUCKING AMAZING! AM I NOT? OF COURSE I AM! ...Am I?
Stop being such a fucking bitch. You are more desperate than a teenage fucking virgin. In fact, you may easily be still a virgin cause she's not actually your """"""""""""""""""""""""""Girlfriend""""""""""""""""""""""""""".
Get some fucking balls and stop qualifying yourself faggot.
>>8495329
>waaaahhh no one touches my penis
>>8494270
>Send the text
fucking millennials
can't even dump someone in person
>>8495350
Jokes on you, I do it all the time and I know definitely what works. I also had an imstagrann model 9,5/10 in my apartment and we fucked all day. Stop prohjecting.
Great fake story, but tell me more about this onion glaze.
>>8494303
t. sandnigger
Not that I should help you but look up the symptoms of arsenic poisoning and see if they match up with any ailments you have right now.
how is it that on a cooking board, no one recognizes pasta when they see it?
there's no fucking way OP's story is legit. it's too stupid.
same with
>>8494303
if it's not a copypasta, it's obviously someone trying to start one.
>>8494253
There is no way this is real. I refuse to believe you're this much of a cuck that you take this garbage from her.
>>8495360
This. Never dump over a text unless you seriously fear for your life, and if that's the case, why the FUCK did you ever date them? It's a little bitch boy move to ever break up via text. You've gotta see the crushing defeat in their eyes.
>>8494303
This would make a great short film. Tom Ford could do it the way he did nocturnal animals
>>8495430
>tfw Lars von Trier will never make anon's story into a needlessly complicated art house film that then gets shunted to netflix
I didn't know I wanted this until you posted about Tom Ford. Nocturnal Animals was pretty dope, but I kinda want to see anon's psychodrama played out for 2 hours and have establishing shots of ramen that take 10 minutes. It'd make drinking games so much fun.
Seriously, nothing is funner than getting some normie friends together and making fun of art-house movies.
>>8495471
>Lars von Trier and not Uwe Boll
This is 4chan not tumblr
>>8495471
I can just imagine the wide shot of an empty field with a mostly set sun in the back and a heavy blue filter while anon hammers his tiny wife in the lower right third of the frame
>>8495481
>implying Lars von Trier isn't actually hilarious in his own right
Uwe Boll is funny too, but it's waaaaay funner to drink with normies and watch movies that are supposed to be "important". You can always tell the faggot who takes the shit too seriously and you can laugh at them too.
>>8494253
She clearly wants to dump you dude, or she's just not worth sticking with. So just fucking dump her ass first and don't pay for any more of her shit.
>>8495492
I can imagine the wife looking all frail and European while the husband is some generic American, or fucking Willem Dafoe.
>>8495596
>Willem Dafoe
More like Jerry Messing
>dating basic bitches who watch vine compilations
I shiggiity diggity Doo famalam
>>8495610
>you are now imagining Jerry Messing brutally beating some pretty European woman and then yelling at her later if she wants to go back to her parents
That's honestly hilarious to me, and I feel a little bad about it.
>>8494303
tippety top
what race are you?
>>8494253
if thats not bait leave her, also who tf should eat all this food, how fat are you
>>8494271
Don't listen to that "dump her" anon. It is way too harsh.
Just smack her once or twice on her face so she will learn her place and respect your work next time.
She considers her phone more important than you, my ex did this shit id ask a simple yes or no question and she would tell me to hold on because she is trying to read something on facebook and get all pissy, fuck that bitch
Not a really crazy story but here goes
>need dinner
>spend 15 doll hairs on beef and veggies and spice
>make crock pot beef and veggie meal
>forgot rice
Still a solid 7/10. The missing three points are for rice
>>8495661
White.
Well, whitish. I'm mixed with some other random shit, none of which is Irish, before anyone asks.
I probably shouldn't have posted that reply. I'm not proud of it, but life does some fucked up shit to a person. Just know that I'm a decent person, but I don't like to be talked to a certain way. I'm not going to continuously argue with a woman over trivial nonsense. If I tell her to shut the fuck up, that means the conversation is over.
>>8494303
PROTIP:
Read this in Sean Connery's voice