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I have no idea, because in my grocery stores a decent sized block of cheddar costs barely more than a pack of those stupid Kraft singles.
This is what happens when women are allowed to leave the kitchen for extended periods of time. That sort of shit would catch the mother of all beatings in the 1940's. Imagine serving this fucking shit to their husband after a long day at work? He'd split their head open with the frying pan.
Bing Crosby was right; the ever-present threat of domestic violence kept families together.
>whites cooked to almost nonexistent
>single on toast
HOLY FUCK DO YOU EVEN CLEAN BITCH.
THAT IS DISGUSTING. LOOK AT THAT SHIT, IT'S ALL OVER THE WALLS TOO.
>when she dumps in the entire bottle of water
Why does this exist?
Not my pic, but I actually like them kinda like that. I can fry an egg normally for others, but when I make them for myself I pretty much cook the white as much as possible without cooking the yolk.
One question from a yuropoor.
This is some kind of a sick joke right?
Yunno I'm Polish and polish national food revolves somewhere between brit-tier and pig-disgusting save for pierogis so my "wifey" expectations aren't that high but the stuff posted in here is just fucking horrible.
So fucking glad my mum taught me how to cook when I was young.
Damn. I wanted to post two different videos....
Rough transcript :
"The surprise with chocolate:
Welcome. Today we'll be making a surprise.
For that we have mixed yogurt [Fruchtzwerge, yogurt for children, different flavours mixed together] and spoonfull of cocoa powder.
And out of this choclate we will create the shape of a heart. Oh, and three candles.
And let's add some chocolate corn flakes.
Now we light up three candles.
And the surprise is ready. Have fun making it on your own, the recipe will be in the video description"
And here's another one. Extreeemely wifey:
"Welcome to my video.
Today we make some roast potatos.
We need potatos, salt, leek, oil, garlic and pepper.
I put the potatos in water and now I cut them into slices
You can cut them into whatever you want, pieces, slices, whatever.
Meanwhile put some oil into the pan
Now for the leek. Normally you use onion or red onion, but I don't have any, that's why I use leek.
Let's go to the pan!
The pan has heated up
Now we add the potatos and the leek
Meanwhile I cut the garlic into slices [off camera]
Now you add some salt and pepper
Now you have to wait until they turned brown
Smells great! Looks super tasty!
A fast recipe!"
It's like HowToBasic but not meant as a joke. This guy really thinks he can cook
She's always a woman to me.
-- Billy Joel
once i got locked up overnight (more like 2 nights) and the only thing they gave us was some bread with cheddar and a packet of mustard, but damn if that didn't hit the spot.
i make that shit all the time now. i'll throw it in the toaster oven for a bit since i have the luxury, being a free man.
sometimes the simplest meals are the best.
Oh haha, nothing serious.
Its pretty dumb actually. I was going for an evening walk around the neighborhood and the police approached me and informed me they were looking for a suspected pedophile, so I made the joke that 'a few people have certainly suspected me of being a pedophile, probably all the anime' and the officer got understandably confused. Put me in a cell overnight until luckily they caught the guy.
got very drunk and put my fist through an on-again, off-again girlfriend's apartment window after a fight. carried myself outside and waited for the cops.
if you plan to get arrested in brooklyn, do it on a weekday.
Don't you love women get away with this shit. They tear your heart out, and when you justifiably (but albeit irrationally lose it), time to go to jail!
I wish we could lock up women for cheating or being stupid cunts.
yeah a less drunk me would have just vacated, but let me tell you punching that window was a real catharsis. not nearly worth the year of court hearings/order of protection bullshit, however.
of course she goes and fucks my friend she met that same night just days later. i mean i gave him the go ahead but i was really impressed by her hubris.
i didn't stick around. i'd been through the rounds with this girl and this was basically just a booty call that went horribly wrong.
i was dealing with a lot of other shit at the time and got impossibly drunk and possibly high at a party beforehand, then went self-destruct mode back at her place.
i mean it's definitely the dumbest shit i've ever done don't get me wrong.
Flips are the shittiest people on the planet.
>super arrogant for no fucking reason
>many of them are devoutly religious and oddly aggressive about it
>most annoying girlfriends
>constantly spout phrases and words that Black people used like two years earlier
A good quarter of the civil engineers and techs in my city are Flip so I'm constantly dealing with them.
Seeing that mayo in the back was making me uncomfortable, thinking he might use it.
Then he scooped it into the beans.
>literally an entire fucking cup of mayo
Jesus fucking christ
Do americans really do this?
Not really, it did but fact of the matter is that a lot of people put a lot of money in it, like a hashtag scheme. A lot of media companies were paid off big time to push that shit. Twitter sucks now and then and it was a bullshit way to get people's email's and IDs. They can fuck off, it's almost as stupid as linkedin.
>'murican telling foreigners to get over themselves
The irony in this statement
Not loving 부대찌개 Army stew
bitch stay the fuck away from my kids. no, not "our" kids, my kids. I showed that picture to the judge & he not only granted me full custody but also advised & granted a restraining order against you.
no fuck off
holy shit how did she?
HOW DID ? WOOW
wtf is wrong with her? She cuts it like a 70 old granny
>she attended Cordon Bleu in France and graduated with honors. Feel free to contact her and discuss her techniques. I'm sure you guys will have a good conversation. She's really nice.
Like you could do it better.
When I was locked up the only thing I got was a breakfast - an off-brand Twinkie-like thing and a carton of milk. I've never been able to find a Twinkie like that one - it was really good. It wasn't a sponge cake, it was more like a bundt cake.
I started making them at home and I bring them to cookie exchanges. People love them.
Cheapest possible store brand white bread. It's been improperly cut, so each slice kinda bulges outward in the middle. This results in that type of toast as the middle part will be closest to the heating element.
are you guys joking?
I'm from Chile and here we mash the avocado, add a pinch of salt, a tiny bit of oil, and we eat that with bread (especially toasts). If the avocado is not ripe, we might just cut it like this and add it to the bread.
I can eat fckin eggplant sandwiches while watching wreckless eating main show.
I laugh my ass off on /b/ rekt threads.
I vomited like three times in my life, just because I was ill. Never from any smell, never from bad food, never from alcohol.
But from watching this fucking thread I actually gagged. A lot. Especially that "stu". What the f is wrong with these people.
>Toast is barely brown
>Toast isn't even buttered
>Cucumber for no reason
How do you fuck up beans on toast?
Don't blame it on women. It's just our culture is starting to hate cooking.
>women cooking is seen as stereotypical and mysoginist, so people are against it
>men cooking is seen as excessive and too much work, when microwave dinners exist for easy access
If you couldn't make alot of money as a renowned chef, the culinary arts would probably die a slow death.
At Benihana they prep meat on huge stove tops. Pic related.
The joke is that you should not be doing that on a normal stove top because it wasn't designed to be used that way. It would also be super impractical for cooking, I assume it would cook unevenly due to the sparse heat sources. The clean up afterwords would probably also be a pain in the ass.
I have to be honest here, it may look like garbage. But it looks like she actually tried. It looks like she tried to make a handmade dough (or maybe a frozen dough) and just had a bad time. And possibly doesnt like meat or something. Still looks better than half of the shit on this thread, it was a legitimate attempt.
S...she went to 'school' for this shit?
I'm a piece of shit and worked inna kitchen for 1 year and I indepently discovered how to use a knife better than her.
Also, stone > steel. Stone for sharpening, steel for coarse honing.
Lastly, my $30 Celaphon(?) knife is just fine and holds a great edge because I know how to take care of the bevel when I sharpen it with a fucking stone.
As a Dane, I have tried to make sense of this post for a few minutes now and it's just not happening.
Did you mean "bage"?
I'd say it's fair to blame it on women to a certain extent because perpetuating the tradition of home cooking was traditionally one of their obligations and they failed it just like how men failed to perpetuate handiness and now the average millennial can't even replace an alternator or make a cabinet. The culture of self-reliance that has traditionally been a significant part of the American cultural identity has atrophied over the last few generations among both sexes and that's a horrifying state of affairs.
Shit tier quesadillas/breakfast burritos at 2 am. Like, taco bell quality.
It's just a really salty dairy product. It's not as gross if you don't think of it/really use it as cheese.
>make a cabinet
Why the fuck would the average person ever need to do that? Specialization is key in the modern economy. While everyone should be able to cook, do basic repairs, asking people to make their own furniture is going backwards.
>born too late: the post
People being fuckups is one thing. Women having comparably less time to spend as men - because they're getting educated/working etc. comparably to men - "in the kitchen" is another. And that's okay.
Btw I'm okay with and enjoying laughing at the fuckups itt. Just dumbasses gloating about their fucked/nonexistent cooking chops. Gender, really, isn't the joke here.
>Women having comparably less time to spend as men
To be clear: women today having less time to cook than traditionally because they're busy beyond being only a homemaker. Similar to men.
changing an alternator is EZPZ,
But cabinet making! Thats a whole different ball park.
Also I hate working with wood, it swells, bends, warps, splits and has grain structure....
yeah. soft avocados i mash up, add a little bit of salt and put on toast. once in awhile i put a fried egg on top with salt & pepper, maybe a bit of mozzarella cheese too. if not, just avocado slices with a little bit of salt.
shit son I was agreeing with you, I think that fidelity to romanticized narratives of golden thyme behavior should be upheld at pain of hyperbole
wasn't moralizing procreation or memes, shhhit, nigga can't even shitpost in this day in age without a hater jumping down his neck
Material gain or self-fulfillment? We should be so lucky. Women have to be in the workforce for a household to simply survive. This is the modern economy. Unless one partner is on extremely good money, both partners need to have an income.
The alternative is to remain single and childless.
>extremely good money
Stop living in giant cities. A man on a decent wage can support a family in most places. Accountants, carpenters, teachers, technicians of all kinds, these give enough money outside of cities where you pay 2 grand a month for a shoebox.
>I'm willing to pay an exorbitant markup for my home because I literally can't function outside of a metropolis
Have fun shelling out ~$350,000 for a condo while I pay half that for a house twice as large on a lot bordered by a national forest.
no, they're worse.
my best friend before he died was Filipino but that fucker couldn't tell the truth if his life depended on it and he was Americanized as fuck.
but the Filipino in my town are fucking horrible. they park in fire lanes in front of markets, travel in packs of 6 or more, push their carts into you to get to their jugs of water they always buy, let their kids run around unsupervised and open and eat food in the store and stash the wrappers on the shelves.
thankfully their never in the produce isle and they only go near the discounted bulk meat filled with additives so i don't have to deal with them for the most part.
honestly, their actions have made me kinda racist; like i understand now why people hate them and say ignorant shit like "get out of my country".
i'm pilipino and this is totally not representative of pilipino cooking. she needs to die. the look on that poor guy's face. also, it might be my imagination, but it sounded like he tried to hold back a barf.
Like wow niggas how fuckin hard is it to put some shit in the oven.
You do know that corn grows on a cob, right?
It wasn't until very recently that instant popcorn became a thing, before then it was sold on the cob and you'd pop it like this.
You have to be 18+ to post on this site, even SFW boards.