>tried cooking for the first time >made scrambled eggs

>>7122441
I just started and made some really shitty fucking french toast. Just keep going man, we'll all make it.

>>7122441
What went wrong?

It's okay, eggs are cheap.

Because you're fucking hungry. Start watching cooking shows, m8. Not the reality tv bullshit. Actual people cooking and talking about what they're doing

>>7122455
They were dry and bland and made me feel sick.

Try making fried eggs. Scrambled eggs do take a small amount of finesse to do perfectly. Also, butter in the pan, salt & pepper on the eggs. Maybe some parsley or such if you have it, too.

Don't give up.
Practice, experiment and there's some good cooking guides in youtube.
It's okay to fuck up, I don't understand why people are so intimidated by cooking.

>>7122459
Was the pan hot when you put in the eggs? Sounds like you overcooked them

>>7122459
So season them and don't cook them for as long. It's not like cracking the Da Vinci Code.

How do you fuck up eggs? Scrambled eggs at that?

>>7122441
>How do you not give up in the beginning of learning to cook
Necessity.

What procedure did you follow?

You did follow a published procedure, right?

File: tmp_19652-1447984387756427874291.jpg (177KB, 768x1024px) Image search: [Google]

177KB, 768x1024px

>>7122508
>published procedure
It's scrambled eggs, not a souffle.
>tip

File: 1434141699469.jpg (41KB, 500x384px) Image search: [Google]

41KB, 500x384px

Don't worry anon, I was where you are once and now I can make a whole thanksgiving meal myself. Eggs are beginner-tier and super simple, but only after you've made the requisite mistakes - mistakes are the portals of discovery.

How to get good at cooking requires the same temperament needed to get good at anything. Mostly, that you don't give up no matter what. Realizing that there will never be a time where you don't make mistakes. You need to have a humbled, seasoned, mature approach.

It will be an endless process. You'll make a recipe, fail it, do it again, repeat until it works, or more ideally, until it works and you know WHY it works. There are a lot of things to learn, but you don't have to learn them all immediately. There are some cooking truths even seasoned chefs have only just discovered...

Cooking is in a bit of a grey area. It involves chemistry and is for all purposes a science, but its userbase are typically layman. Some chefs have no idea WHY what they do works, there's a lot of myths in cooking, a lot of disinfo, a lot of wive's tales and taken-for-granted discoveries and hand-me-downs.

As long as you keep trying, keep learning new things bit by bit, and really try to grow as a cook, you'll be able to make something great in weeks, and with each day your success ratio will increase!

Just don't get discouraged, anon, and you'll get there.

i was hungry, too poor to eat out every meal, and sick of microwave dinners OP

practice makes perfect, and cooking is a great way to learn that

watch yo momma cook and learn like that

File: 1437394989214.png (573KB, 621x672px) Image search: [Google]

573KB, 621x672px

Everyone who doesn't do it the Ramsay way is making shitty scrambled eggs.

>>7122898
Use a bain marie

>>7122441
realize that everyone who is good at cooking has likely failed more times than you've even tried.

Get a decent non stick pan.
Have eggs, milk, olive oil, bowl, fork, spatula.
Turn stove to about 3/8ths power/BTUs.
Crack your eggs in said bowl, add generously, pepper, and salt. They are seasonings, use em.
Add a fatass splash of milk depending on number of eggs.
Beat with fork like your mad at em.
When your pan is warm/hot....not hot!
Add a very small amount of oil to the pan and swirl it around.
Add your bowl of beaten eggs.
Run the spatula through your eggs and along the sides. Don't start breaking all your eggs apart. Fold em gently. Noone likes little ass pieces of dry egg.
If towards the end the pan sounds to hot, turn that motherfucker down a bit.
Keep the eggs moving but be gentle in a way.
When you think they are still not done, they are probably overdone.
They keep cooking after you plate them.
Have a plate ready so you can dump em right as they are done.
If you leave em in the pan you're fucked.
Good luck.

>>7123574
>Crack your eggs in said bowl, add generously, pepper, and salt.

Stopped reading right there.

>>7123580
I could give a shit, you're not op. I'm just trying to help this guy cook half decent eggs. He said they were bland when he cooked them. So add some fucking salt. Or do they make your eggs rubbery...go suck a dick.

how the fuck do you fuck up cooking scrambled eggs

i was fucking making that shit in elementary school

are you a literal manchild?

>>7123603
Way to kick a man while he's down. This man just fucked up scrambled eggs. He's probably on suicede watch ATM.

>>7122441
Guess what? The first time someone tries to do something that requires a little practice to get right they usually suck at it. Even cooking eggs.

But guess what? You have the internet. You don't even have to read to learn anymore, you can just watch videos. So research is probably easier than it's ever been. Want to cook something? Watch a bunch of videos of people cooking it, and copy the ones where it seems to turn out the best. If you want to be super nerdy you can read a bunch of recipes for tips and tricks.

Cooking isn't hard, but when you're starting off you have no idea what you're supposed to be paying attention to so you will fuck up. My brother still jokes about eating "mistake" for three days in a row back when he was in college because he spent all his money on groceries, and had no idea what the fuck he was doing in the kitchen. Dude's a great cook now.

Do a little research and pay attention to what you're doing and you can get there pretty quickly. Getting good may take a while, but getting to the point where you don't fuck things up on a regular basis comes pretty quickly if you give a shit about what you're doing.

>>7123580
Ramsey-parroting kekold detected.

>>7123625
Well put. Now cook some fuckin eggs op.

>>7122441
Admitting they tasted like shit.....first step to improving.

>>7123652
>I ignore the advice of a chef who won 3 michelin stars because... ummm... ur a kek

>>7123673
Op isnt asking for 5 star scrambled eggs. He wants better eggs.

>>7123680
Abd the advice ramsay gives will help

>>7122459
Add salt if you're not already eating bacon. Use ground pepper not the flakes. Butter in the pan is a must. You're gonna make it brah

>>7122951
Meme but true

>>7123673
>I mindlessly worship everything some kek does as unassailably brilliant cookery because some fucks from a tire company like him.

>>7122441

Really good scrambled eggs are a bit of an art.

Here are some items you can start with that require next to no technical skill:

> Chili Con Carne

> Seafood pasta

> Spaghetti Sauce.

> Homemade hamburgers.

> Dry spice chicken wings.

> Shake and Bake chicken

(some people will probably debate whether this is truly cookery but the main ingredient is a raw meat so it's clearly not the same as some frozen pre-prepared shit).

> Salads.

> Basic soups like chicken noodle.

> Steak and Baked Potatoes.

You shouldn't seriously screw any of the aforementioned up if you just pay attention to the recipe.

>>7123787
>listening to advice and the reason behind advice and concluding it is good advice is mindless following advice

>>7122441
>tried walking for the first time
>fell over
>got hurt
How do you not give up in the beginning of learning to walk?

File: zkft8ih.jpg (2MB, 3200x2368px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 3200x2368px

you shouldnt be eating eggs anyway.

Melt butter on very low heat, add eggs and stir constantly, when you see the egg at the bottom of the pan start to whiten take the pan off the heat and continue to stir, then put it back on and repeat until cooked

Don't season with salt until after its cooked

>>7122502
when i was a kid i always let them just sit in the pan and slid basically a ghetto omlette onto a plate

File: 1427241271384.png (76KB, 292x200px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 292x200px

>>7123574
Olive oil?!
Dude, that's not cool, pranking the new guy like that.

>>7122441
follow this video to the letter and you'll have perfect scrambled eggs errytime

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PUP7U5vTMM0

>>7124264
What's wrong with olive oil? It has its own faint flavour, but that doesn't matter often. So please explain how is using olive oil "is a prank"?

>>7124278
I know you're not deliberately pranking him, I was being ironic. But even using flavourless oil is pretty bad, one should only use butter when cooking eggs (scrambled, fried, omelettes etc of course).

>>7124278
It's nice of you to try and help the guy out, though, I'm not trying to be a dick. I was just pointing out a mistake by being a bit a bit ironic about it.
I don't agree with you about the milk either; it adds no flavour and just makes them sloppy (and no, it doesn't help fluff them up).

>>7124278
The smoking point of olive oil is much lower than other oils, for one thing. Secondly, it has a strong flavour that will almost always overpower your eggs.

/olive oil delusions

>>7124319
Do you get store credit somewhere if you lie or spread misinformation on the internet or something?
First, you have to use a fuckload of olive oil and no seasoning to make the eggs taste like olive oil.
Second, you have to be a fucking idiot to bring olive oil near its smoking point. You would need to set your plate to maximum heat and wait patiently. Never in my life I had any trouble with olive oil and I don't know anybody who would fucked up with it.

File: 1352351539227.jpg (22KB, 311x311px) Image search: [Google]

22KB, 311x311px

>>7124264
>>7124284
>pranking

>>7123603
i bet you've fucked up something that's elementary to other people. go jack off somewhere else with your own photo

op, every mistake is a chance to learn a lesson. there will be a point where you'll stop shoveling bad food in your mouth that you begrudgingly have to eat, and instead are so happy you get to eat good food every single night and save on the bills as well. keep trying!

most beginner mistakes are based around heat, as even recipes can't help you decide if the pan is too hot, oven isn't preheated, pasta is done, etc... so pay attention to your heat and know what temps mean for food reactions! it's not as bad to eat undercooked food as people say, so err on undercooking stuff first.

I cant even make fried eggs

>low heat
>drop eggs in
>cover
>whites immediately cook
>they get hard, yolk not cooked at all
>wait just a little longer hoping the yolks get a little cooked
>check again, theyre rubber as the whites

every fucking time....it makes absolutely no sense, meanwhile my mom will spend like 20 minutes cooking eggs and they come out fine

>>7124435
>cover
Why? It's worth a little extra time and electricity to be able to keep constant check on your food.

>>7122441
-crack open eggs in a cup, add a really small amount of water to it (3 tablespoons if you want to be exact), then stir until the yolk's combined with the white, but not to the point that there are already a lot of bubbles forming
-keep the pan at low heat, like really low heat (non-stick pan would be great)
-melt some butter, just enough so that there's a puddle of melted butter to cover a good portion of the surface of the pan and let it simmer for a bit until small bubbles appear (don't let that shit become brown though)
-pour in the scrambled eggs slowly into the pan, careful not to spill any
-egg won't be cooked instantly with the heat your'e using, and that's okay, just keep the egg from sticking onto the pan
-if most of the egg's cooked (i.e. most of it's solid), takeit out of the pan, don't let it cook until it turns brown

>>7124455
Who scrambles eggs with water and not milk?

>>7124379
No, I'm not new here, you just don't have a valid argument. If you think shitty meme olive oil is acceptable for frying anything then you must be pretty new here.

>>7124458
That works too, I just use water so that it won't dry out

>>7124374
Please note that you're the only one advocating olive oil. If you read through the thread, there are plenty of people mentioning the use of butter. Just accept that you are wrong, learn a lesson, be humble and move on.

File: 1426286077812.jpg (6KB, 378x378px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 378x378px

>>7124466
>implying I'm the person who thinks frying in olive oil is a good idea
>implying you're not new for using "pranking" instead of "trolling"
>implying implications
>2015

>>7124469
I think his point is why would anyone use water when milk exist

>>7124479
Again, wasn't being serious when I said it, it's a phrase people use, the world does not revolve around 4chan. And if you think using the phrase 'trolling' marks you out as a /c/uck, /b/tard, /pol/ack or whatever, rather than anyone born after 1975, you're a fucking idiot. '
Hurr durr, we're so cool we even have our own culture that normies can't understand'
In fact, just fuck off back to /r9k/, you fucking millenial prat.

>>7124488
Calm down gramps

File: 1364930754456.jpg (188KB, 650x650px) Image search: [Google]

188KB, 650x650px

>>7124488
So where'd you come from? 9gag? Reddit? Either way, you probably don't belong here, son.

>>7124490
Yeah, sorry about that.

>>7124492
Ha, now I know you're just fucking with me. Go get your jollies elsewhere.

>>7124490
>>7124492

You've been rekt, underage samefag. Fuck off now.

Scrambled eggs taste gross though

File: wrong.gif (110KB, 384x678px) Image search: [Google]

110KB, 384x678px

>>7124507
>samefag

>>7124517
this

don't hate the playa, hate the game

or something

>>7124450
Because it's supposed to cook the yolk faster, and i don't like flipped eggs

>>7124486
If you add either you are a pretty shitty cook.

Try again?

File: 1312504676337.png (16KB, 215x223px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 215x223px

I made scrambled eggs again today.

They came out so much better. I heated up the pan on a lower heat, and cooked the eggs on the lowest heat setting after the pan was buttered. I used a bit more butter this time, didn't use milk like I did before, folded the eggs more gently and cooked them for a much shorter period. I also used less salt and pepper.

I-I'm gonna make it /ck/

>Put the milk in the bowl
>Put the cereal on to
>Bowl is engulfed with flames

I-it's a start

>>7122459
Add a splash of milk, and a little cheese before you beat the eggs. Add a pinch of salt too. Use a pot, not a pan, and stit a bit every minute or so. Once the eggs are whole, and little liquid is in the pot, they're done.do not let them boil. At ALL.

>>7122441
it's all about practice op
just keep trying and you'll get it

File: image.jpg (2MB, 3264x2448px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 3264x2448px

>>7122441
>tried cooking once
>this happened
>haven't tried making anything in a month.

>>7122441
mate, where's this penguin picture from?

>>7122441
No milk.
I personally scramble mine over high heat very quickly in a saucepan (kinda like le meme gordon ramsay eggs) and I like them very much. Just make sure you don't overcook them and take them out of the saucepan early. The curds are very fine, but if you're careful to not overcook them it's got a combination of texture and moisture that I just love.
You could also scramble them very slowly over low heat, but usually when I want breakfast I'm too impatient to do this. The curds are much larger if you stir less frequently, and the texture will be quite delicate.
I used to be like you. It felt like I had no idea of how to cook anything and there was no way for me to learn. Just give yourself a chance.

>>7124954
god dammit someone tell me where the penguin is from :((

>>7124813

wow that's a bad recipe for scrambled eggs

File: tmp_19308-spjV3N61176810624.gif (677KB, 499x378px) Image search: [Google]

677KB, 499x378px

>>7124778

File: IMG_20151130_201752.jpg (1MB, 1224x1632px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1224x1632px

does this look OK to eat? they're pork chops and I was trying not to cook them to death

>>7125198
Its from looney toons, and google image search still works on this site...

>>7125230
Trichinella has been all but eliminated from modern pork stocks, but those are probably way under the guideline of 140 degrees.

>>7125230
>Undercooked pork

Not really

File: 1425056634396.jpg (114KB, 720x960px) Image search: [Google]

114KB, 720x960px

>>7125230
You have to cook pork to 165
Any pink and you risk getting ill

>>7125230
some people claim trichinosis is no longer a threat in the pork supply.

i would still cook pork until medium well. that looks more medium rare. if you are concerned with dry pork, look into brining recipes. they add flavor as well as keeping the meat moist.

i do agree with not nuking pork until it is a tough, dry, uniform white mess. i just think you are on the furthest side of acceptable rareness for pork.

>>7125230
Yep, they look fine. I've always eaten pork pink in the middle.

>>7125240
>>7125242
>>7125245
>>7125246
>>7125251
Okay, thanks anons. I've been trying to do them by consistency but it can be tricky to get it just right. This was the thicker one so I may just fry it up once more with some onions to make carbonara

>>7122441

When you pick anything up you're going to be shit unless you're really unlucky.

When you were a baby you really fucking sucked at walking around but hopefully you eventually learned how to walk.

Same with talking, eating, cleaning, yourself, etc. You eventually get it with enough practice.

OP, if you're wondering, properly cooked scrambled eggs are one of the toughest things to actually make, since it requires a lot of skill to temper them properly.

The best thing I learned about scrambled eggs is to cook them a little bit runnier than you want, as the residual heat from the eggs will cook a bit of the runniness away.

>>7125283
It does look undercooked but color isn't a good indicator of temperature. Get an instant read thermometer to check temperatures if you're cooking thin cuts of meat. The revised USDA guidelines for pork have a lower temperature now. I think it was 145 F for steaks, chops, etc. or so provided the meat wasn't pierced. Ground pork and organs are still 160 F. If you want to be safe, always make sure that all your food is fully cooked as there are other microorganisms in and on food that remain there even if the outside is fully cooked. T. gondii is a more well known one but the undercooked steak eaters regularly ignore it and say that it's safe even though that's not true. The other issue is mechanical tenderization which is a process where needles pierce meat to make it less tough. This brings organisms from the surface of a cut of meat to the inside which means the whole cut now has to be fully cooked. These are supposed to be labeled as such although they weren't a few years ago, but if there is a mix-up somewhere they can be mislabeled. So if you're buying meat at a grocery store, check for needle marks.
As others have already said, scrambled eggs are a bit tricky to get just right. A lot if it has to do with getting the pan to the right temperature and the amount of eggs you are putting in at once. You'll eventually get them to be pretty good and then you can work on their curd size, runniness, and fluffiness. You can use oil, but it tends to leave a bad aftertaste. Butter and salt seem to work best. Practice and you should get it right.