>Be crouton
>Today is the day of the crouton uprising
>All of us croutons huddled together in bag.
>Must be hundreds of us
>Human doesn't stand a chance
>Lie in wait for days
>Finally we hear human picking up bag
>Everyone is silent
>Suddenly feel movement.
>Bag lifted into air
>Tossed onto table
>Everything is crazy
>See some croutons breaking in fall
>Everyone scared
>Bag starts to open up
>Now's my chance
>Rush to front of bag
>Gonna beat up human after bag opens
>Bag fully opens
>Ohshit.jpg
>Human is huge
>This is bad
>Start turning around to run away
>Human grabs me
>NOOOOOOO I scream
>Human doesn't hear me
>Puts me and crouton friends in bowl
>Whatishegoingtodotous.jpg
>Close my eyes
>I’ve accepted death
>Hear godly noise
>Open eyes
>Bright light
>OHMYGOD.jpg
>It’s crouton Jesus
>Heroically jumps in bowl
>I’m in a bowl with crouton Jesus
>This is the best moment of my life
>Wait
>Oh no the human
>He grabs Crouton from bowl
>Oh my god he’s got crouton Jesus
>He shoves crouton Jesus in mouth
>It can’t be
>Crouton Jesus is dead
>Human makes weird sound
>He must be enjoying Crouton Jesus
>He makes another sound
>He starts screaming
>Whatthefuckishappening.jpg
>Human screams louder
>Human explodes
>In his place is Crouton Jesus
mfw we finally won
>All of us croutons huddled together in bag.
>buying bagged croutons instead of making your own
Not gonna bother reading the rest of your post because you are a shitlord who pays for seasoned dry bread cubes.
>>9315445
Learn to cook, faggot.
Granny Smoth.
Honeycrisp
Easy. Gala.
When would you want something with chalky texture? I thought of this when I tried hemp milk, and can't think of time I'd want that.
>>9314732
Some people just want to watch the world burn.
What's the deal with people and the heel of bread? It's perfectly fine bread. I hate when I'm at work and have to throw away the heel because some whiney bitch will throw a fit if I serve them the "weird looking" piece of bread. Pic related, egg salad sandwich with the heel of the loaf.
>>9314691
Probably the same people that cut the crusts off
If its just some generic non toasted white bread from the grocery store then yeah the crust is gross, but if its decent bread no reason to throw out the crust
The heel of sourdough is the best part
Hey guys
I've got a baba ganoush craving so I'm probably going to make some for dinner. I'm trying to stay away from refined grains though so using breads as a vehicle for the dip is out of the question. What are some good alternative mediums to scoop some baba ganoush up with to eat? I was thinking oven baked sweet potato chips but that sounds like a hassle.
>>9314551
have you tried just grilling the eggplant? (Pic semi related coal roasted eggplant on naan with sumac and yogurt sauce) I can't really fathom baba without a flatbread of some kind.
Hunk of onion
buy a non grain flour then and make your own flatbread like chickpea or light buckwheat or most gluten free flours.
Literally kill yourself if you buy pre-shredded cheese.
Light your cunt on fire and fall on a sharp rock you mongrel shitstain.
Leaning toward reporting ya
Pre-Shredded Cheese is actually a good source of fiber
>>9314376
i do what i want
how can other sodas even compete?
>>9314211
I like that serbian pop, enjoyed it in belgrade. reminds me of dr.pepper a bit.
Surprisingly, it's not a gay bar.
I'm talking about Filipino Adobo here
Whenever I try to cook adobo according to some internet recipe, it always seems to generate alot of fat even if I uses conservative amounts of fatty parts
But I can still not forget that one time I ate adobo in a Filipino restaurant in Manila where there was barely any fat and just good juicy soy/vinegar sauce
I am quite new to cooking so I would like to hear some advice on this
don't know about excessive fat but I recommend adding turmeric to it to make "adobong dilaw"
>>9314024
What sort of low-intellect negroid are you that you don't understand the principle of "draining off the fat" before serving?
I FUCKING LOVE BLACK PUDDING
I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT
white pudding is inferior
Enjoy gut cancer m8
>>9314480
How so? It's not burned
>those 25+ yo friends that can't cook at all
here are some of my roommate's staples
>frozen pizza, plain lettuce on the side
>pasta, with cold ragu dumped on top straight from the fridge, plain lettuce on the side
>frozen fish and french fries, plain lettuce on the side
>pizza pockets/bagel bites/frozen pizza-y item #53897587, plain lettuce on the side
>all of which is copiously covered in ketchup
i have never seen him eat anything else at home
>not learning to cook from your parents while growing up
unless you didn't have them at all growing up, if they didn't teach you stuff in the kitchen they failed as parents. being over the age of 20 and only knowing how to make mac and cheese and ramen noodles is a complete embarrassment.
>>9313493
oh i forgot one
>kraft dinner with chunks of hotdog, plain lettuce on the side
he also covers in in ketchup
Recommend me a good, healthy food that I can snack on absent mindedly, either store bought or prepared.
I used to roast and spice chickpeas but I found that took too long, and the store-bought ones are unhealthy.
I eat dry cereals (brans, muesli etc.) now but I'm worried the sugar content will add up.
What's your rec????
cum. if you make it yourself it's net zero calorie
>>9313415
does eating someone else's cum amount to a calorie intake??
In a week or two I'm going to a cottage with some friends to barbecue stuff and drink beer all day. We plan on hitting up a butcher and a cheesemaker on the way to go with our beer and vegetables.
What are your favourite things to bbq, /ck/?
Got any good recipes?
>>9313361
You mean grilling? Barbecue is something similar to but different from what your pic shows. Mainly in that barbecue is meat that is smoked over a long period until tender and is given a dry rub and/or sauce. A grill may or may not be involved. But autistic semantics aside, I do have a few favorite things to grill. A London broil does wonderfully when marinated for a day and grilled medium rare, plus it feeds a whole crowd. Giant portabello mushroom caps seasoned, grilled, and then eaten on a bun like a burger is surprisingly good, satisfying to both vegetarians and meat eaters. And of course, some grilled pineapple rings brushed with soy sauce make a great addition to any burger as well as a side dish unto itself.
>>9313393
pineapple should have seemed an obvious choice to me but i will try them with soy sauce
grilled portobello sound fantastic, would you season them at all or just slap em on the grill as is?
I like dogs and I'm okay if blind people take their actual service dogs everywhere, but what's with allowing all these dogs in grocery stores and restaurants? Isn't that unsanitary? Aren't 99% of these people just abusing the service dog laws with their "comfort pets"
>go to grocery store
>lady with lap dog in her cart, another with a full size doggo walking isle
>go to lunch
>fat girl with full size dog sitting next to the table, which she feeds scraps
Am I just overreacting?
>>9313301
What's not to like?
>>9313301
i don't know where you live but where I live they aren't allowed unless it's a service dog. people can eat with their dogs at outdoor tables though
Fun fact: the ADA no longer recognizes emotional support animals as service animals. You can legally kick these people out if you wished.
Lets talk about slow cooking.
I saw this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVkZnUf1RuM
So basically most of those braising videos on youtube are stewing. Now I still dont understand when to use which technique. I've alway half submerged the meat and put it on the stove letting it simmer for a few hours, turned out fine. I guess you cant braise on the stove since there is no heat from the top side? And what does half submerging even do why not just fully.
I've got some oxtail so give me your slow cooking tips.
just depends on what you want. with a stew the aim is usually to have the meat flavour the sauce, and have the sauce be a little lighter, because you're drinking it up with a spoon. with a braise you often serve the piece of meat intact on a plate and reduce the braising liquid to an intense sauce, or you shred the meat and bind it with the sauce to stuff it in something or whatever
you can braise on the stove, you just won't get the glazing effect on the top and sides of the meat, and less caramelisation of the sauce. same thing with half vs full submerge. you want a substantial portion of meat to get the effect of browning and you want the liquid to reduce to a saucey/glazey consistency.
oxtail usually gets stewed i guess. i think if you have one big piece of it, braising it with guiness then serving it hot and steaming with the guinness glaze over the top and pickled radishes and turnip mash would be pretty good, cause you can sort of drag the meat away from the centre bone with a spoon
Any tips on how to make good pizza at home?
The main limiting factor will be that in using a conventional rather than woodfired or stone oven - how to negate this?
All other pizza discussion welcome too!
Buy a pizza stone.
>>9312700
Seems neat but a bit pricey and inconvenient for me at this very time
>>9312667
One can just get a mixer, pour flour, olive oil, salt, start mixing, slowly pour water until the mixer is stopped by the solidifying of the dough, and cook that over a pan with some olive oil.