Lolita Meets

>>9173412
I haven't hosted any meets this year because of my job, but I recently attended one at a bakery!
>what I wanted out of the meet
To actually sit and enjoy other lolitas company. Small talk about what they've been up to using info I remembered from the last meet. Gush about the latest glb, latest buys, dream dresses, whatever.
>what I got out
Segregation between the novice and the core group. Usually this isn't too much of a big deal because we get seated at different tables based on rank. But this time, we were all sitting on one large table and the core group made it a point to segregate the table by using chairs as bag holders in the middle....it was really awkward. Barely anyone talked to one another outside of their circles. The itas were loud and obnoxious which was especially embarrassing because the bakery echoed.

Food is probably the best thing to do in a large group because you have something to do/eat when you're not engaging in conversation. It also offers conversation starters for those who are shy.

I've never been to an in home meet, but I imagine them to be quite dull unless you're all very close. I know I wouldn't host one because I can't trust my comm members with personal information, let alone access to my sanctuary.

>>9173412
Private residence meets sound fucking weird unless you know the host pretty well.

The last two meets I attended were disappointingly small, not enough people in my comm have the same schedule and a lot of them are also cosplayers, so they haven't been wearing lolita lately because of all the cons

One was a bakery, the other was sushi. Typically museum meets get a lot of people to come out, I was hoping for a museum meet but nobody would commit to go this time and it got cancelled

my comm has meets at members homes a few times a year for things like halloween and christmas parties, it just gives the host the opportunity to go all out with decorations and whatever and then everyone who attends brings a plate of food to share. it tends to be the same smaller group of members who come to meets frequently, so we all know each other fairly well.

>>9173412
>Tell us about the last meet you hosted, what went wrong? What did everyone love?
I'm new but I do want to eventually host a Kamikaze Girls meet at a local theater that does events. I have yet to do any research on how to go about this, though. I assume it costs a bit of money as well.

>Are games important? What games are better, in your opinion?
So far out of the 5 meets I've been to only one had us all playing a game and it was pretty fun. There was a scavenger hunt too but that was too intimidating for me as it required taking pictures of people and I didn't know anyone there. I really enjoyed the create a dress game we had though.

>What happened at the last meet you attended? What did you really want out of it that you either didn't get, or didn't expect to see there? What was the most memorable part of your experience?
We went to a cute french pastry place and I met lots of lovely girls I hadn't yet and actually had a real conversation as opposed to awkward small talk from previous meets. I've yet to have anything truly horrible happen, though.
There was a girl there who took everyone's photo and helped everyone pose for things and it was just so cute. She wouldn't shut up about cats either which I loved. (no seriously I love cats! I will talk about them all day!)

>I've been to two meets, and so far I can tell that food is a sticking point. Based on other people's feedback here, it's a very common issue. What was the most satisfying/impressive food set up you've ever seen?
Every meet I've been to revolved around eating food somewhere. And there was always a post before hand asking about allergies. Before lolita I had never even heard of having an afternoon tea in a hotel but I guess it's a very common thing? Also, some of the best food I've ever had. I'm not a picky person but because I'll eat just about anything, its rare that I REALLY love something aside from sushi. The tea was amazing too.

>>9173652
>Private residence meets sound fucking weird unless you know the host pretty well.
I'm still pretty new, but is this just a lolita thing? All the normies I know constantly throw parties at their houses and I mostly hang out with them at their houses. I would not even consider some of these people good friends as I rarely hang out with them.

But in lolita it seems like it's seen as weird? None of the meets for my comm are ever at someone's house either. But it's a pretty big city so I guess there's just more fun things to do than go over to someone's house and get shit faced.
(instead we go to bars and do the same?? but in lolita???)

>>9173694
Maybe it's more of a growing up thing? I often got invited to hang out at people's houses/dorms when I was still in school and college, but now that I'm graduated and have a job it's very uncommon to invite someone over to your house unless you're already close. Especially if someone has a spouse or family. Personally I felt comfortable inviting people over to my parents' house but now that I have an apartment with my fiancé it would feel weird to just invite a bunch of frilly strangers over.

>meet you hosted
Honestly I've never hosted a meet. And with my current comm never will. Our mod doesn't give that much room to host meets and even hers get flaked on pretty bad.

>games
I've yet to attend a meet up with any games. Generally our meet ups are around cafes, teas if not... do this after we eat at a cafe. I believe movie or plays are the only meet ups that aren't food based but in those events we don't get to chat or anything.
>last meet up
We tried out a new cafe we've all been eyeing. I was hoping to finally meet a new comm member which kind of happened or learn the drama if not hint around it. Recently a major clique had a falling out and it wasn't posted online like they usually are. Our comm is drama free at the comm page level but on few members facebooks they're always openly talking shit about each other and doing everything short of tagging them in the post. It's awesome to watch because they think no one in the community notices when we all have our popcorn ready.
>Most memorable
Once we had a turnout of 3 members. The host didn't even show. It was actually quite nice because we got to really get to know each other and have fun when normally we likely wouldn't have.

>satisfying/impressive food
A wedding cake was at the event. It was probably the best cake I've ever eaten minus the decorative frosting. I love sweets and have eaten so many pastries but this raspberries and cream wedding cake was to die for.

>private residence meet ups
Where I live, I can't imagine anyone in my community doing it unless they live in the rich rich part of the city and were the braggy type. Family culture is a bit different here and most of us don't have magazine room goals. I think it's fair to say likely no one in my community does or if they do there place isn't big enough to handle a meet up turning out bigger. Our comm isn't close enough to probably feel comfortable to do that either.

>>9173412
I'd love to host a meet in my community, but I'm newish, and not very well known, and I doubt anyone would actually come. Any advice on getting people to come to your meet in the first place if they don't know who you are?

>Tell us about the last meet you hosted, what went wrong? What did everyone love?
I've never hosted a meet. I have some ideas for a meet-up but they are unusual for my comm so I'm scared people will think it's weird, and I hate putting myself in the spotlight. We always have the same meets hosted by the same people.

>Are games important? What games are better, in your opinion?
I've never been to a meet-up where we did games. I think it could be a lot of fun and a way to get people to interact more (my comm is very cliqueish). Old fashioned games would be good.

>What happened at the last meet you attended? What did you really want out of it that you either didn't get, or didn't expect to see there? What was the most memorable part of your experience?
Nothing special happened. I wanted to talk to more people but you are always stuck with the people who sit next to you.

>What was the most satisfying/impressive food set up you've ever seen?
Home cooked food at a meet-up at someone's house. I'm tired of doing high tea even tough I love tea and I love that teaparties are part of being in a lolita comm, because the food with high tea is always so disappointing.

>>9173961
It's the same as most any kind of meets, I suppose, but start small.

Have a place to meet up, preferably with some kind of activity such as a museum exhibit, make the effort to introduce yourself, and keep the conversation going, and thank everyone for coming after the meet.

It's ok to have doubts, but there shouldn't really be a problem with hosting a meet if you're new, so long as it's not a huge and expensive meet because that would be overwhelming if you've never planned an event before. In my experience, most lolitas would like any excuse to get dressed up and go out with other lolitas.

>>9173694
Yes, but with lolitas it's not even a problem of not really being someone's friend. Someone might be a complete stranger. It's completely possible that someone might attend that's completely crazy. If it's a public comm meet you open up the possibilities to inviting nutsos to your house and if you try to exclude them it's 'elitist'.

Someone had a swap meet in sf comm at their house, and it was before all the allegations before MB came out, so even though she was very against him being their or knowing her address, because it was an open invite she couldn't exclude him. It was fine and nothing happened, but I wouldn't want him in my house either.

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>>9173412
>I've been to two meets, and so far I can tell that food is a sticking point. Based on other people's feedback here, it's a very common issue. What was the most satisfying/impressive food set up you've ever seen?
The problem is that attendees want variety, and unless organisers are checking out every new place the comm goes to beforehand you're going to get variation in quality. I know there are a few comms that do this but mine is too poorfag for hosts to fork out for afternoon tea twice.

I've been to eight different places for afternoon tea and the difference between them is huuuuge. Some of the most expensive afternoon teas were horrible. I've actually prefer going to a traditional café which offers a selection of cakes, sandwiches, etc to choose from than going anywhere with a pricey set afternoon tea menu where you get landed with whatever they give you. You really have to check out the venue beforehand to know if you're going to get something nice.

>>9174019
>You really have to check out the venue beforehand to know if you're going to get something nice.
aren't online reviews a good source of info?

>>9173694
Depends on the comm. I know a lot of rural US comms host meets at people's houses pretty regularly because there's not much to do outside. Most comms have the same few people turning up to most meets, so if you just invite the regulars it's fairly safe, but depending on the comm people might throw a pissfit saying it's exclusionary to not let strangers into your house. It's possible that there are private residence meets going on in your comm and you just don't know about them because you're not friends with anyone yet, or that there's a ban on private get-togethers due to past drama.

>>9173925
>a turnout of 3 members. The host didn't even show. It was actually quite nice because we got to really get to know each other and have fun when normally we likely wouldn't have.
>three members
>three members
>tfw this is just a regular meet in my comm

It's so disappointing because I live in a city, but most meets only get 6-8 attendees and it's not uncommon to just have 3 or 4 people. There was a meetup recently where only one person turned up, and even our biggest meetup last year only had ~15 people at it. I know people have been put off coming because of drama in the past, but it's getting pretty boring meeting the same people all the time.

>people don't turn up because of work commitments
>comm isn't large enough to sustain two meets a month to accommodate different schedules
>dream of hosting one on a Sunday and one on a Saturday in each month, or one on a weekend and one on a weekday
>no point because most people can only afford one meet a month so barely anyone will come

>>9174020
Basically no. For somewhere super famous or really long-established then yes, but for your average small venue there'll be too few reviews to get a good understanding of the quality. Plus restaurants change hands all the time - the same place could have been great a year ago but shitty now it's got a new chef, or meh a year ago but way better now it's under new management. Obviously if somewhere has a ton of negative reviews avoid it, but the only way to tell what somewhere with an average online presence is like at the moment is to go and visit.

You can't really trust the menus either. Place A and place B might both advertise "Afternoon tea with a choice of sandwiches and a tray of cakes, scones and dainties" but place A might have way better-quality bread, faster service on the tea refills, cute little scones and a mixture of cakes, and place B might be all massive scones and not much of everything else.

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>>9173412
>What happened at the last meet you attended? What did you really want out of it that you either didn't get, or didn't expect to see there?
I'd like it if our meets had more photoshoots. There is always photographs but it's just taking turns to get one or two pics of everybody and the pictures often come out bad. I'd like to have a meet where people were encouraged to keep taking photos until they've got awesome shots of everyone, rather than letting that one girl with a DSLR do it regardless of her skill level. It took me three meets to realise that our comm's designated photographer was actually shit at taking flattering coord shots.

>>9173412
Hosted a meetup and called in a favor for the location. Location was really nice but had strict rules regarding food. Announced on Facebook the rules and asked if people wanted to meet elsewhere for food. No one seemed interested so I didn't plan anything. 2 days before this girl (who is always so problematic) messages me asking about food. I repeat the rules, told her this wasn't a place for food. Tells me I need to bring food if I wanted a good meet up. I try to calmly tell her that I had said what the rules were for using the location and everyone seemed ok with it. She doesn't respond after that.

Day of the meet up she brings a bunch of messy, crumbly food then get's upset that I didn't bring anything.

>>9173925
If you're from my comm, which I think you are, the mod has hosted meets in her house before. She just doesn't invite anyone outside of her circle, which is understandable

>Tell us about the last meet you hosted
I usually host meets at my apartment that I share with my sister. But I don't invite the whole comm, just the core people and any interesting newbies. Most of the newbies are cosplayers and very very young, so there's definitely a gap between them and the core group. I also do not invite people who have drama to the same meet, since the last time I did that, there was quite a lot of tension in the air.

I also usually segregate the rooms of the apartment into different areas, like the dining room for food, the kitchen for making your own juice blend, the living room for watching movies or playing on my xbox, and the bedroom for playing board games. Usually I'll invite around 20 people and this stops my smallish apartment from feeling too cramped as there's about 3-6 people at each 'location' doing stuff. Once in a while they'll rotate or if they smoke, they'll do it outside the apartment and chat.

>Are games important?
When I was a newbie, games were quite important since they helped to break the ice and get people talking to each other. Now that I'm an oldfag, I prefer to just drink tea and chat with other oldfags while the newbies play games.

I think scavenger hunts are the most 'exciting' but also quite disruptive because there's an element of competitiveness and there might be sore losers. Other than that, I think the better games are those to do with lolita 'history' like charades out of print names or a 'name-that-print' challenge.

>What happened at the last meet you attended?
The last meet I attended was last year's Winter ILD. (Work has been too brutal for me to come to any recently...) We played games and ate way too much at a buffet style place. I think the doorgifts were the most memorable since the host drew small caricatures of each person attending and put it in the door gift. It was pretty cute.

>>9174011
Oh yes this. 99% of my comm I wouldn't mind having over at my house (though not at the same time lol) but it seems that even in a relatively drama-free comm like mine there's always at least one person who is at best super flakey and at worst a total nut. We recently had someone dramatically flounce from our comm after being banned for all sorts of awful things and I had no idea, thought she was totally nice and normal. I'm only inviting people I've known for a long time, now.

I'm planning a movie meet, I have a huge 4k and sourced a bunch of old flicks. I could accommodate a good 10 people or so. Since I'm still brand new to my comm, I'll wait on it.
In the inter-rum, it doesn't seem like my comm does small meets often, so I was planning a crawl through a really lolita friendly area of my city. Has anyone been/done/seen a meet where there is a starting location, and the venue changes?

I have a fancy shaved ice dessert place next to a posh french bakery, across from an arcade/bar, within walking distance of a number of other good restaurants and bars. I'm really tempted to set it all up, but I'm not sure how it will be received.

Definitely doing the bakery first, seeing a movie, and inviting anyone who stays after out for drinks at the arcade. I was also thinking of getting cute doilies and what not to give to everyone that came, to protect their dresses from the bar stools and theater seats.
(If you're in my comm/ this area sounds familiar, give me feedback!)

>>9175117
I should clarify, there is also a theater within the block, I'm not talking about seeing movies at a private residence.

>>9174166
If you're American, we aren't in the same comm and the mods place isn't that big but I know she does do stuff with her circle,bas do all mods I assume, because I've been invited to a few of them.

>>9173412
>Tell us about the last meet you hosted, what went wrong? What did everyone love?

I hosted a tea party at my house for ILD. It's a small comm so I knew everyone who came. It was nice because we could have a lot of food for cheap since it was hosted at a home.

>Are games important? What games are better, in your opinion?
I think it's good to have something to do other than eat, but games aren't necessary. I've done lolita bingo and played Cards Against Humanity at meets. I really like meetups at museums and places where you can walk around and have things to do.

>What happened at the last meet you attended? What did you really want out of it that you either didn't get, or didn't expect to see there? What was the most memorable part of your experience?
The last meetup I went to was at an Escape Room. It was really fun because there was an activity to do so we got to interact in a different way.

>What was the most satisfying/impressive food set up you've ever seen?
I've been to a number of tea events at various tea houses. The ones I like the best don't skimp on the amount of food and tea for the price, but also have a variety and nice display.

>Meets in private residences, are they ever a good idea?
My comm does them fairly frequently, but we are a small comm. I imagine it's less typical in bigger comms, or comms in large cities.

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I recently got shamed at a meet for wearing brand. I didn't think that actually happened, I thought it was seagulls humble bragging. I'll be damned.

>>9173412
>Tell us about the last meet you hosted, what went wrong? What did everyone love?
The last and first meet I hosted was at a local Victorian mansion home museum with a trip to a cafe afterwards, the only thing that went wrong was I had no idea the cafe my com told me about was so... Not pretty

>Are games important? What games are better, in your opinion?
Depends on the meet, but I love card games the most

>What happened at the last meet you attended? What did you really want out of it that you either didn't get, or didn't expect to see there? What was the most memorable part of your experience?
The last met I went to was the one I hosted, I really wanted the cafe to be nice and was excited to go to it because it was one I always heard about, but it really didn't live up to the hype, most memorable part was a table that the top was images made completely from mini mosaics.
>I've been to two meets, and so far I can tell that food is a sticking point. Based on other people's feedback here, it's a very common issue. What was the most satisfying/impressive food set up you've ever seen?
The first meet I went to was at a fancy Japanese restaurant, so that was nice
>Meets in private residences, are they ever a good idea?
Very highly depends, but I lean to no

>>9180792
Deets?

>>9180792
>>9180803
You can't just leave us hanging like this anon!

>>9173525
I find it so strange to have ranks in a comm. is this a common thing in your country?

>>9182345
It's fairly common for large US comms from what I've seen. Everyone figures out what niches they'll divide into and they'll sort themselves accordingly. It's weird, but it's just how a lot of people over here tend to socialize.

>>9182345
Not OP, but it more naturally separates in my comm. Older, more established lolitas are friends outside just the comm and we have group chats and stuff because we find each other easier to talk to because we follow brands and refine our wardrobes and such. Newer members tend to stick together out of nervousness and because they have similar goals in building a wardrobe and finding what works for them. Kind of like how people tend to stick with their age group at large parties and events. I'm trying to talk more with new lolitas and get them excited about it, but sometimes it's like talking to a child when you have to tell them what a JSK is.

>>9182351
yeah, this even happens in my group of normie friends. They're all friends but you can definitely like pair them up with certain others and they could form their own friend group kind of thing.

And it's that way in my comm too, and it's fine? Like the highest ranked girls aren't douchey to anyone. If they're more popular and more well known than anyone else and are always throwing events and such, it's fine. Some of them have so much brand it's ridiculous and they're the kind of girls who have a new dress for EVERY meet up. They're elite for a reason.
Not in some silly mean girls way.

>>9182354
This is exactly what I meant as >>9182351
I've seen it broken down differently, but there's normally at least the oldfags and the newfags on different sides of the table, the rest is more region/comm specific.

>>9182358
The more I know and learn about lolita, the more I've come to realize just how broad it is in terms of economics, demographic and style.
I am really looking forward to one of my comm's meets that she's planning, she's done so much leg work to get a good meet together. Her progress updates are making me hype.

>>9173412
>Tell us about the last meet you hosted, what went wrong? What did everyone love?

I just hosted one this Saturday. It was a small meet, about 5 people attended. Unfortunately the lolitas where I live are spare and few and we get a lot of noobs with no actual clothes. So while we have fun, all of the events are lackluster.

>Are games important? What games are better, in your opinion?

I have never had any in our comm, I wish we would play at some point. Thinking about printing out a lolitopoly board as well as Lolitas against humanity.

>Meets in private residences, are they ever a good idea?

If you know the people involved then why not. The problem with lolita gatherings at one's house (as opposed to anime/etc gatherings) is probably the fact that when lolitas meet, they try to find shops/cafes with similar (or at least somehow neat) aesthetic. A lot of people feel that their house is not on par with that, and feel self conscious to host.


For me, a good meetup would include a fair amount 5+ of well dressed people, at a nice location with fun activities or at the very least nice and interesting conversation. But then again my standards are pretty low for my country.
Generally speaking, if I want to experience true lolita meetings, I usually attend some big international event like in the UK

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>>9173525
>>9182345
>>9182358
I’m coming to realize that my comm does have ‘mean girls’. I know they’re mostly a fantasy strawman for bitter ita’s but I s2g my comm has them. If you’re not wearing a recent AP set or have at least xyz followers on social media you can’t sit with them.

>be new-ish to comm but not new to lolita
>at my second ever meetup with this comm everyone agreed to first meet up at a specific spot in a park close by the café
>be first to arrive, wearing Meta velveteen that I painstakingly hunted down on Y!A fuck yeah
>second to arrive is a girl in an AP set with her normie boyfriend in tow
>she ignores me, but maybe she’s just shy?
>compliment her coord and try to break the ice by saying “That’s [print name], isn’t it? It’s even prettier up close!”
>she seems surprised I’d talk to her, looks me up and down, gives me the most Regina George face I’ve ever seen and says “Ugh yeah, it’s [print name]” then goes back to staring into the distance
>her boyfriend jokingly chides her for being snooty and she just rolls her eyes
>end up chatting with her boyfriend who seems like a total bro
>more girls arrive, many in Bodyline and Taobao
>AP girl continues ignoring us while her bf happily chats with us
>two other girls wearing AP arrive, one of whom is somewhat e-famous
>first AP girl gets up as soon as she spots them, runs over to them and starts talking in a really animated way
>hear e-famous girl laughing and saying “Oh you poor thing”
>spend the rest of the meetup clustering together at a separate table, taking selfies and coord shots and avoiding the rest of us, while her boyfriend hangs out with the other bored out of place boyfriends looking bored and out of place

If being around us plebs is so awful why even bother coming to meetups? Just hang out by yourselves FFS. I spend most meetups hanging out with the resident ita’s because even though they don’t dress well they’re at least friendly and kind.

>>9182647
as if people bring their boyfriends to meets, that seems so rude to me!

my comm definitely has different groups within it, but whether or not they organise their own seperate meet ups is kept fairly quiet. the group I spend the most time with (and includes more of the top tier members I guess?) do things together quite often, but there's no sense of elitism or exclusivity; it's just who gels better with one another.

>>9173412
>Tell us about the last meet you hosted, what went wrong? What did everyone love?
Never hosted.

>Are games important? What games are better, in your opinion?
We rarely use games, we watch films.

>What happened at the last meet you attended?
In all of our meets (that are long) we go to the movies first so people have something to talk about. Then we eat, then something else. Anyway we went to see The Green Room which is a horror film that's pretty gory, honestly not my thing, but I still went.

What did you really want out of it that you either didn't get, or didn't expect to see there?
There were basically no normies. Just us dressed in frills (We don't wear pettis at the movies tho) and a LOT of punks. Movie started late and they started to talk to us, why we were dressed like that, but obviously from a place of actual interest, so it was good. Everyone was pretty chill!

>What was the most memorable part of your experience?
They went to eat with us. So at first a lot of people went to the movies dressed like farmgirls to this fucked up movie, then a lot of guys went dressed as punks to an upscale cafe. They explained us a lot about the bands in the film and punky culture and we taught them tea rituals. It was extremely entertaining honestly.

>I've been to two meets, and so far I can tell that food is a sticking point. Based on other people's feedback here, it's a very common issue. What was the most satisfying/impressive food set up you've ever seen?
One of the girls in our comm is a bartender and she make us cocktails with smoke in them. Pretty cool.

>Meets in private residences, are they ever a good idea?
The above was at a private residence, but I'm not from USA and the culture here makes it the norm

>>9173412
>Tell us about the last meet you hosted, what went wrong? What did everyone love?
The last (and only) meet I hosted was a holiday gift exchange. I had some problems with people not coming to the actual meet to give and get their gifts, and I also had a few people who were just total flakes, but that kind of stuff is to be expected. Other than that everyone seemed to have a pretty good time, liked the gifts they got, and enjoyed walking around downtown in the unseasonably nice weather.
>Are games important? What games are better, in your opinion?
I know my comm has a monthly game night type of meet, but I haven't been able to go to one yet. So far all the meets I've been to haven't had any games.
>What happened at the last meet you attended? What did you really want out of it that you either didn't get, or didn't expect to see there? What was the most memorable part of your experience?
Well the last meet I was able to attend was our winter ILD tea party. Personally I didn't find it that great. The food was pretty subpar, the venue wasn't that great either, and it cost way too much. The most memorable thing from it was the fact that I got stuck in traffic on the way there.
>I've been to two meets, and so far I can tell that food is a sticking point. Based on other people's feedback here, it's a very common issue. What was the most satisfying/impressive food set up you've ever seen?
The first ever tea meet I went to had some of the nicest stuff. Very tasty tea sandwiches, as well as a lovely location!
>Meets in private residences, are they ever a good idea?
If you know the people who are coming, sure go for it. But I wouldn't just open up my home to anyone and everyone in my comm.

>>9182702
This sounds awesome as fuck.

>>9182741
Yeah it's pretty cool we want to do a photoshoot with them soon

>>9173412
>Meets in private residences, are they ever a good idea?
If everyone in attendence is at least acquainted with each other beforehand, yes.
But a meet intoducing new members to the comm? No. Just no. Trust me, it's awkward as fuck.

I'm pretty new to lolita, and I'd like to go to meets to maybe make some friends and just spend time with other lolitas.
How do I find meets? And when I do find one, do I just show up or how does it work?
Also, any dos and don'ts to keep in mind?Besides going around being a cringy ita

>>9182770
See if your city/area/region/state/country has a lolita page on Facebook, since that's where the online comms are at nowadays. If you don't have a FB make one and make sure it has some lolita stuff on it so they know you're not a random creeper. Ask to join the FB group and maybe send a message to one of the mods if they require that sort of thing.
Then once you're in, just keep an eye on the page for people posting about meet ups. Usually they'll make a separate event page and send out invites but it depends on how big the comm is if you automatically get invited. Chatting with people in the community before you attend your first meetup isn't necessary, but it helps.

>>9174025
This. I am in a comm in the SE US and we frequently have meets at peoples houses. I've always had a nice time at them. It's honestly weird to me that other comms say they don't have them.

>>9182770
Oh and of course it's good form to let the host know that you're coming and don't flake out last minute, especially if reservations have been made.

going to my first tea party,can anyone tell me about the atlanta comm? how would you join one? im newish to wearing lolita and have only ever worn it at 2 other cons and im kind of nervous even about asking others wondering the con i guess

>>9182798
I don't really have any advice other than don't get sucked into the bullshit of a certain trans lolita. She probably won't pay you too much mind unless you have a lot of brand already or are a possible pity project. Other than that, good luck. I hear the comm has gotten better in the past years.

>>9173652
My comm does them semi regularly for swap meets and games days. Its not weird for us because small tightnit community.

>>9182798
Which tea party? Bc if it's the one in January I'm going too.

>>9183195
im going to the one at awa

>>9182874
okay ill try to be careful lol i also wont have any brand until its tea party time since ive had my eye on a dress already

>>9182792
My comm is too big to have meets at someone's house.

>>9183376
Ah okay. Yeah I'm a cheapskate who wasn't spending $80 for one teabag and some cold sandwiches. Have fun tho. I plan to spend some dough at the booth still.

>>9183380
i dont know ive never been to a tea party so im hoping for the best but ive got a bunch of money coming in so i plan on dropping at least 2k at the con lol

>>9183382
Hope for the worst so if it's better you'll be pleased. My first brand tea was AWA and it was so disappointing, they're never getting my money again. I might spend $50 for a brand tea at another con, but not AWA's asinine pricings.

>>9182798
I'm not from the Atlanta comm but I'm going. There should be girls from all over the South East going, myself and some of my comm members included, if you worried about interacting with the Atlanta comm.

>>9182798
Oh and remember to wear Meta! It's common courtesy to wear at least one item from a brand at their tea party! Luckily, you'll be able to purchase something at their booth if you don't have anything.

>>9182791
>>9182794
Thanks a lot anon! I live in a rather big city, so hopefully there'll be a group I can join!