Lolita Comms: Valentine's Edition

My comm is having a meet and we're encouraged to exchange valentine's, but I don't have any good ideas for what to make. any suggestions?

>>8844414
Somebody already made a new thread. >>8844061

What are the comms like in L.A and San Francisco?

>>8844439
>Linking to a thread with no comments when this one has a few already

Kek.

As far as I know, there's no meetup planned. I'm okay with that because I haven't had a chance to celebrate Valentine's Day with my husband in a few years. I'm hoping grandma will keep our kid and we can go have a nice Valentine's date.

Any other seagulls stuck with an salvageable comm? The local community where I live is a joke with absentee mods, shitty meets and quite a few girls so bitchy you swear they have a few petticoats stuffed up their asses. I've had enough of this comm but I don't know if I can do the lone lolita life.

>>8844491
>unsalvageable, rather

>>8844491
I was going to say this sounds like my comm, but I just realized that it's probably all lolita comms.
I don't really have much on common with my comm and I have a raging hate boner for a particular girl that I'm constantly trying to ignore. I always look forward to meets, but just end up hanging out with the same girls every time. I wish I could just start again, but I don't forsee moving until after I finish school here.

>>8844491
My comm isn't unsalvageable, but a lot of good members have been falling off the radar because of work or whatever, and the current group turning up are either bodyline-chans or hamplanets. At the last meet 1/4 of the people attending weren't borderline ita. I'm worried that it's going to get worse because the borderline itas don't seem to be learning or getting better.

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Here is mine

My comm is doing a Valentine's meet but I don't have anything that fits the theme so I'm thinking of sitting this one out. That, or getting a heart shaped bag and wearing my pastels.

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>>8845016
Where are her feet?

>>8845061
the true hover lolita

>>8845061
>her feet
How about her entire legs. Wtf

>>8845061
>>8845074
Turn up your screen brightness, they're under her chair.

My comm has nothing planned. Probably for the best anyways because I didn't want to do shit for that entire weekend.

>>8845061
how dark is your monitor?? I can see them just fine

>>8844450
San Francisco is pretty nice. Most people are friendly, and there are tons of events so you can chose what kind you like to attend.

>>8845189
Not everyone is friendly. Just most people.

>>8845189
You think anyone would be on on a meet up with a forgein lolita? Will be visiting soon and would be fun to meet some new people!

are all gulls honestly singel or what? Nobody's gonna be with their boyfriend/girlfriend?

I bought someone in my comm a cute AP necklace last year for Christmas, and today she put it in her sales album on Facebook. Should I be a little salty over that? She didn't ever wear it, but she did have stuff it would match with, and I feel weird seeing her sell a gift for more than what I even paid for it, but at the same time its her necklace so I'm unsure if I have any right to be upset..

>>8845750
I'd be upset if I was in your position. If it ultimately just wasn't to her taste it would have been polite to say it to you before selling it on. It's just manners.

>>8845633
Not all valentines meets are on valentines day, anon. Our comm is hosting theirs the weekend after.

>>8845016
It's one thing to vent about your comm but I think it's pretty rude to share photos of them here.

>reposting from the other thread

Any info on the AL comm? I might be transferring down there for a job, and I'm kind of worried that they're going to be a bunch of itas. I don't have a very good impression of most of the Southern comms.

>>8845750

She should have politely returned it, saying something like, "This is lovely and I appreciate your thoughtfulness, but I haven't managed to wear it yet because it's not to my particular taste. Hopefully you can enjoy it more than I did!" At the very least, she should gift it to someone else rather than sell it.

However, I think it depends on how close you two are. If you're good friends, it's undeniably rude and poor manners for her to sell it. If you're acquaintances or not super close, I could see where she might feel its okay to sell it, but she should have been more discreet.

>>8844414

I hadn't thought of making valentine's for my lolita friends but I may try to think of a few good puns and make some cute cards. My comm has a Valentine's meet to go eat at a Brazilian steakhouse but as someone who doesn't eat a lot of meat, I'm passing on that one. I wish we had something like a tea party or anything more refined. Tbh, eating that much meat in my frills just seems so uncouth. So I'll just celebrate solo or with a friend.

>>8845834
welcome to cgl

>>8845902
I've been here for years. It doesn't mean I have to agree with sharing pictures of innocent people the poster knows personally. These people aren't shitposting or doing stupid things in the comm, as far as I know. They literally just posed for a photo. It doesn't need to be here.

>>8845907
There are stories anon.

Dark tales of the past.

>>8845762
>>8845867
We used to be super close, but we've certainly grown apart in the past year or so. We were still pretty close when I gifted it to her, and we made plans to exchange gifts outside of any comm function because we were friends, but now I think I'm pretty much done with her. She just texted me to boast about the sales she's been making, and when I asked her what she's sold the first thing she listed was "I sold that AP necklace you gave me for my birthday or Christmas..."

I was hurt before, but now I'm just pissed. How fucking rude to brag about making money off of someone's gift.

>>8845633
My boyfriend gets grumpy about commercial holidays like this so at most we're having a nice dinner at home, then the week after we'll lay around stuffing our faces with discount chocolates.
Frankly I live with him and see him often enough so that I actually prefer spending the day with my comm on special days like this. Many girls in my community feel the same.

>>8845750
>>8845762
>>8845867

Once you give someone a gift it's up to them to do what they want with it. You guys can say things like "she should have given it back" or "she should have told you before she sold it", but if you are upset shes selling it, you would have been just as upset if she did either of those two options as well.

Honestly if I gave someone a gift and they weren't happy with it, I would be glad if they sold it because it means someone else will still use and appreciate the item. If she doesn't like or plan on using it, she shouldn't have to keep it around just because you gave it to her as a gift. At least she didn't just throw it in the garbage.

That being said, usually when I sell things I was given as a gift I try to hide it from the person who gave it to me just so I don't hurt their feelings. Even though they don't really have a right to be offended, it still happens.

>>8845632
Yeah, just post on the fb page the dates you'll be here. Someone will try and organize sometching for you. If ariella posts, ignore her.

>>8845972
>>8846059

I don't deny that because it was given as a gift she has the right to sell it, but given the closeness of friendship, it's incredibly rude and hurtful to sell something so publicly that was given to you. She should have been more discreet. It doesn't appear to have been thoughtlessly given, so I think anon has every right to be offended. If I gave a good friend a present, having found something that would match their wardrobe, and if they turned around and sold it, I'd be seriously offended.

>>8845835
They are a well dressed group. Their FB group page is Alabama Lolita Coterie

There's no real comm in my area, so I'm going to the zoo with my boyfriend in a casual-ish coord and then going to dinner. We both work the 14th, so we're celebrating the 13th instead.

one wannabe efamus desu blogger created a super last minute valentine's meet and is probably going to film it for her youtube even though she flakes out on everything since her baby is not having a babysitter which is the most considerate thing she's done apart from the unwanted filming and constant spam about her blog even though she's only been into the fashion for 6 months

>>8845867
>Brazilian BBQ

I like Brazilian bbq, but I agree with you, I feel like that's too much and too casual for going out in frills in.

Maybe see if the group wants to join you or you and a friend to a nice coffee shop afterward?

>>8845776
Ours is the 13th. And wasn't decided until a few days ago. lol

>>8845633
My comm's valentines day meetup is this weekend. The mahority of us have plans on the 14th so we didnt wsnt anyibe to miss out on anything.
Gor me personally i dont have any plans. My fiance and I both work that day. 7am-4pm for me, 1pm-9pm for him. I should get mad tips in cadh for the day though, so I'll probbably have a mommy-daughter date with our daughter after i get out from work and i pick her up from my mother's house. I hope to coordinate our outfits to match for the day since she has a lot of lolita-esque dresses that are similar in theme and color to dresses I own. My fiance and I almost never have the evening off together, so we always celebrate valentines day sometime that week

Can anybody give me details about the Denver comm? Considering making a trip that way.

>>8845016
Are you in this picture?

Missouri comm? Or do most go in to Chicago?

>>8846274
Oh god are we in the same comm; she shits me to no end.
>two meets organised for the week before and week after
>'anyone want to come to a meet?? idk what we should do though :( :('

>>8845632
Yup, you'll be fine.
We have hosted girls from both out of state and out of country-Sweden, Wisconsin, etc..

>>8847077
There's a few cringey girls/guys but most of the regulars are decently dressed. There's not much drama except some vendetta-chan that used to occasionally pop up here. Not sure when you're coming through but there's a meet coming up this weekend. Otherwise, join the private group and post or message a mod and I'm sure a meet can be set up for you.

>>8847265
I'm already part of the group, have been lurking it for awhile. I'm not too sure when I will be up there, but I'm hoping sometime around sep-oct

>>8846295

I had really hoped that there would be more culture in the comm but I am sorely disappointed. Don't get me wrong, it's fun to do things that are more casual, but sometimes I don't want to get all dressed up to go to the mall.

Is anyone in a comm that regularly does high-culture activities like the symphony, art museum, theatre, etc? Were the members inclined towards those activities already or do they go because it's a meet?

>>8846274
>my sides

Fuck that girl and her inability to fucking google the most basic shit

>wahh how do I buy off baby???
>wahh can some one hold my hand and find all the XXXXLLLLLL lolita stuff on taobao for me??

>>8847305
I know in my comm there are a few people involved in theatre, several are into film. It's pretty great! I feel like I can talk about art with my friends too. The comm has a lot of people, though so there are obviously varied interests. We don't regularly do those sort of activities since they can be costly and appeal to fewer people, but there was a positive response to a gallery meet. I'd like to see a play with the comm one day or a symphony with my friends, but I'm just as down for karaoke and casual stuff.

>>8847202
Not sure what you're talking about?

Chicago is a good 4-5/hour drive from St. Louis. I'm sure each comm stays amongst themselves unless it's something big like Acen or the mega meet, but even then, I rarely ever see folks come out that far for a meetup. Most of the out of state Lolitas come from Iowa, Michigan, or Wisconsin.

>>8847216
I think we are Anon,
>>8847357
She actually posted
>Not really sure what's on taobao and junk
um, go browse and use google translate? it's not that fucking hard. There's heaps of links to taobao on Loli Updates all the time. Why even have a youtube talking about Lolita if you don't even know anything yourself.

>>8847582
I normally defend members but... yeah.

>>8847305
My friend and I have tried organizing meets at musea, the theatre etc. but there is very little interest in that in our comm. People aren't willing to spend money and even if the location is free, they complain that it's boring and lolita is just clothes and not a lifestyle (because going to a fine art museum for once in your life = changing your entire lifestyle, apparently). The only culture my comm seems to be interested in is Japanese pop culture. It's depressing.

>>8847216
>>8847357
>>8847582
thank fuck i'm not alone

if any of you have been responding to her posts, i thank you for your patience.

>>8844450
also curious about the LA comm and the SD comm? I usually hear good things

>>8847713
I am so happy there's others , did you see the main group calling us rude for having a closed group?

>>8847728
Main group? What main group? I thought the closed group was the main group and that the only other group was the Chinese comm.

>>8847357
This. There's a guide in Baby's website and on livejournal. It's not that hard.

>>8847731
Sorry, I meant our Country one

>>8847551

Your comm sounds so nice anon! I have two friends who like going to the museum, but when it comes time for me to make a meetup, it's just me + my friends who show. I'm lucky if one other person goes. I don't know if I'm picking bad weekends or what. I find it hard to believe that in a comm with nearly 400 people, only 3 people would show up, 2 of them being myself and a friend. I put a lunch location prior to the museum so there's time to chat and take pictures, but I'm a little disheartened that over 2 museum meets, I've had 3 people attend, total.

I'll probably keep making the meets since I like to go to art museums fairly regularly and at least I'm trying, then. I'd love to have a meet for the symphony and I know my comm has had opera meets in the past, but they looked like only a few people attended, too.

>>8847623

I think my comm has a lot of cheap people, too, which is just so contradictory. Yes, I don't want to spend $$$ if I've already dropped $$$ on an outfit, but I think a nice outfit deserves a nice meet. They'll get OTT to go to the mall but complain that brand tea parties at cons are expensive.

>>8847747
got it, found the thread

i'm annoyed by that response, since she admits to not having read through the full description, which explains that it's to keep out creeps and inactive members. don't make judgement calls if you're too fuckin' lazy to read everything

and i guess if those people is new, (no idea?) they wouldn't be aware of the shitty drama from the past yet.

>>8848404
>one of those people is new*

Are there like no Chicago comms? The only ones that I find haven't updated for months or even years.

>>8848466
The Chicago comm is called Chigothloli or something, and is pretty large and active.

>>8848562
I found the LJ for it, but it hasn't been updated in a while.

>>8847855
I'm pretty sure I know who you are and which comm this is, and if I'm right, your timing is just bad. The last couple of outings you've posted have either coincided with a major holiday or a convention (a lot of the comm folks are cosplayers and travel frequently).

I like art museums but it's an hour long drive to one that I don't particularly like and that seems to be the one where people want to go all the time. The other major art museum is closer and I love its permanent collection, but it's also surrounded by construction hell so that tends to kill my enthusiasm.

>>8848404
I saw one of the admins replied also and a few others explaining the description again. When i joined it was pretty straight foreward I don't see why it had to be simplified even more?

>>8848573
Everyone is on facebook now.

>>8844450
I'm in the LA Lolita's fb group but I've barely seen any events or posts, so I'm also pretty curious about how the comm actually is

>>8847285
Beware, most of the people who post on the group are the cringey ones, but they don't show up to meets very often.

>>8847623
Anon did you host a museum meet on the 30th?

>>8848595

I admittedly didn't realize the con was happening the same weekend. I felt like I gave enough time for people to plan for both meets regardless but I guess not. It's encouraging to at least hear that the concept isn't bad. I do like the comm overall, and would like to branch out to other cultural events though I don't know how well those would be received. I guess if I end up going solo to something it's not the end of the world.

Does London have a reasonable/ active comm?

Im going to the UK in a few months and would love to visit another community while I'm there!

>>8848958
was this CO last year?

>>8847077
only one real shit stirrer, imo. but I feel like you'll know her when you see her and just avoid her like the plague

>>8852099
What kind of a hick state do you live in that a Brazilian steakhouse is considered fine dining? It's business casual at the most.

>>8852129
It's cute to hear the North gets all gussied up in their finest to go out for meat on sticks. Nice to see someone keeping those early 2000s food trends alive.

>>8849046
>>8849046
I'm not in your comm but if someone planned something the weekend of a con in mine, it wouldn't matter how much advance notice they gave. People who go to cons usually go every year. Knowing about other events in advance wouldn't change those plans.

>>8852117
>>8852129

>foodie

Casual or not, bbq seems so messy and not ideal to eat while wearing lolita.

sage for getting off-topic

There's a comm around Huntington, WV, right? I only know of one person in the area that does lolita but she's a total asshole.

I see a lot of lolitas at Tsubasacon (the town's animu con) though.

>>8852692
what's more embarrassing, her or the font you have on your phone?

>>8852808
i know how annoying kato and voldie are but who's emma?

>>8852808
what's the original comment she's throwing a hissy fit about?

>>8852901
Isn't she the other really girl who was always going on about how oppressed she was and was constantly changing her ethnicities (or whatever ethnicity she claimed she was)?

>>8851918
who is this?

Anyone here know of a lolita named Alicia? She's from WV I think.

>>8852964
I've heard of her. Why must you ask?

>>8852964
>mfw that's my name
it's not me though, sage for irrelevant

>>8847305
Often a little group outside the main comm will form that is made up of people who enjoy these things. But God help you if you make another group for it because 'elitist' will be thrown down instantly. Even by the people who whine that they don't want to do 'that culture stuff, so boring'.

>>8852089
Does she mean that chick from Rufflechat or an actual active comm member?

>>8852692
Which comm is this?

>>8853166
I hear she's kinda crazy. And also a big sjw.

>>8854286
That's what I heard too. Tbqh, I would avoid her. There is stuff about her on lolcow.

Besides, WV Comm is a dead zone. Even worse than Mississippi.

>>8854295
I always just assumed fat acceptance types were always an issue in the cosplay/lolita community.

>>8854294
I remember her making a post going apeshit that someone dissed her costume on some Ohayoucon forum. She referred to this person as a "heifer".

The kicker? She's one of those "fat-acceptance" types herself and even had a "body positivity" panel at Tsubasacon.

>>8852964
>have you heard of this girl? From this place?
>because she's a BITCH
Anon pls what kind of preface is this.
>>8854295
It really isn't a new thing. Have you seen the posts on RC and RC:U? Or fucking tumblr? They've been proportionate to the spread of sjwism in my experience.

This whole conversation seems kind of awkward and samefagish.

>>8854350
>Anon pls what kind of preface is this.
What? I was just curious if anyone was aware about drama related to her, as I've witnessed one or two of her freakouts myself.

>>8852932
Gotta agree. I hate when people only call 'racism' when it is convenient for them to try and use their 'race card' because they feel they deserve everything and not being hired for lack of skills isn't a reasonable excuse to not hire someone. Fucking stupid. Saying 'racist' when it is convenient for you MAKES people want to resent you for your skin tone even if nothing about the situation is racist in the least bit.

>>8854523
I don't get involved in anything on RC related to race. I'm snow fucking white so I'm automatically an uncle Tom and putting POCs down just for existing according to the bat shit crazy SJWs on RC. Yet I'm the racist.

Anyone here in the Slovak comm? I will be in Bratislava for a few weeks this summer and want to hang out

>>8847566
I can't find the comm spread sheet but is there a Missouri comm is what in asking and is it worth it? Or is it with it to go to other states?

Is there anyone from the french comm here?

Hope the MI comm has fun with the shitshow that is that RC thread.

>>8856406
What are you referring to?

>>8855961
Say what?

There's a St. Louis/General Missouri comm on Facebook that has more private meets, as well as a KC Missouri comm for the same. There used to be a "rural" comm for people to meet other lolitas in smaller towns, but I don't think that one has been active for some time.

Where are you located?

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An old lady has recently joined my comm and I find her posts to be rather cringey. I'm down with people at any age wearing lolita, but she doesn't seem to want to wear it. I don't know why she even bothered.

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>>8857440

>>8857440
>>8857441
I would give her no more than a year if she comes to meetups regularly. Also screencaping this is a dick move. I see you're from the Oklahoma Comm!

>>8857440
>>8857441
What the fuck haha
Why did she join if she is "too old for a can can petticoat"? Does she even understand what lolita is, i.e. a fashion, not a movement?

>>8857442
Yeah so? I actually feel more comfortable talking about it here than saying something to her about it. I don't want to come off as mean. It's just pretty weird.

>>8857592
"I don't want to seem mean so I'm posting someone's screen cap to /cgl/"
Ok, OK, seems you guys have had some shit going on over there in general and now this. Hm. Not nice.

>>8857440
What fucking font do you have on your phone that shit is ugly and hard to read.

>>8849468
Is it CO? I'm in a more southern state, we had one then too.

>>8857440
This is so sweet actually... She seems to think lolita is actually about dressing in whatever poofy skirt and having fun. I wish.
We met some ladies from the Red Hat society at a meet once, they are lovely. I think she would prefer going to events with them.

>>8847718
Every one in LA is super cool and chill. Not any drama really except for some problems with the redheaded stripper but she left. Unfortunately after the closing of Fairytale people have been really lazy with creating meetups. The LA page looks dead because there's no reason to interact really. Hopefully things will soon pick up

>>8854549
>snow fucking white
Oh honey, you're white. You can't be an Uncle Tom, you're just racist.
Uncle Tom is for those traitors who dare deviate from what bigots deem acceptable to behave and believe for people of their skin tone. They need to learn their goddam place.
It's so disheartening to see all of the race chat in RC, people like Wonderfinch don't even realise what they are implying when they say these things. At least I know who to avoid, can't stand racists/"prejudiced poc".

>>8857646

>redheaded stripper in the LA comm

Uh, who is this? I've been to a few meetups in LA, but I've never seen or heard this before.

>>8857440
This is incredibly sweet and I can't believe some of you all are such bitter fucking bitches that you would find an old woman reminiscing about the past to be cringy.

>>8857440
Are you in middle school with that phone font? You know 4chan is 18+

Moving to Ardmore, PA soon with my family. Does Philly have a comm, and how are they?

>>8858001
I don't find her sweet, her tone is terribly condescending. She asks to participate but shows she knows virtually nothing about Lolita nor indicates a willingness to learn. The constant references to things that are older than the members isn't endearing.

For anyone who wants to join a pre existing club or team they should make an effort to learn the culture/vibe/rules. Jamming in with expectations that the existing group adhere to your view of what the group should be.

>>8858236
I believe their Comm is called Frilladelphia.

>>8858241
That's exactly how I feel. And some of the members just telling her to wear whatever she wants isn't helping.

>>8857614
I'm about sick of this com

>>8857440
I am so tired of this bs who's got the giant stick up their ass in ok?!

>>8857440
>wants to join in with the kids
>condescends to the kids in her introduction

just go be with the red hat ladies if you're gonna be like that then fuck

The person who was organizing our meet has dropped off the face of the planet. As per usual, she always fucking does this.

>>8857440
Okay, but what's she going to do at a meet when everyone busts out a 3DS or starts talking about the latest vidya or animu?

>>8858342
>Frilladelphia

Fucking brilliant.

>>8857440

Your font is more annoying than her post.

>>8857440
First of all posting this here is ineffective. It's up to your comm mod(s) to guide people to stay mainly on the group topic which is Lolita fashion. I don't care if it's a broke teen lolifying bad stuff, a sissy, a perpetual ita, a cosplayer or someone like this trying to include some idea of retro fashion that obviously won't fit in, if the mods don't keep the gates on your comm and guide people then you will end up with this off-topic stuff. Report the post and your concerns to your comm mods.

>>8854647
I don't know much about the Slovak comm, but you'll be an easy drive to Vienna if you have access to a car, and there's an active comm there.

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>>8857440

You could have mentioned she's a dog-shit-eating steampunk.

>>8859001
Be kind to the sweet old people, anon. Look how cute she is!

>>8859001

Damn do I admire old people who have fun and give no shits. They look really sweet.

>>8858823
Sad to see how fall /cgl/ has fallen when people can't even post actual cringe without people acting like this.

Old bitch was condescending as hell. Boo hoo people are being negative about it.

Has anyone here successfully de-ita'd their comm? How did you do it?

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I'm going to my first meetup tomorrow with my new comm and I'm trying to figure out what I should wear. I'm stuck between four options. Yes I have shoes and pettis, they are not pictured.
>mfw I'm going to be torn apart/nitpicked to death.

>>8859133
2 or 3

>>8859133
3! it looks pretty and comfy!

>>8859142
Sadly what's underneath it is not a proper blouse; it is a pink t-shirt. I'm an Ausfag so it's probably going to be hot tomorrow

>>8857440
How can people use such awful fonts

>>8859133
2 or 3 definitely. Throw out those purple striped socks, they're horrible.

>>8859234
Why do you say they're horrible?

I know a lot of people like to go OTT for meetups, but does anyone else play it safe for meets?
Our group has a lot of newbies who are just getting out of their ita phases, and I always wear non-risky coords in an attempt to be a good influence. I know it sounds pathetic but I'd hate to wear something risky to a meetup and then see a new member wearing it even worse than I did and thinking it's 100% fine.

>>8859248
It's all a matter of opinion. I think they're really cute but some people are apprehensive of striped socks since they can look ita sometimes, which is a reasonable fear since they're often associated with cosplay Lolita or Alice in Wonderland costumes etc.
I think they'd be cute in a coord, but definitely build up a different coord around them, maybe Halloween themed for later in the year?

>>8859291
I also wear simple 'risk free' coords to meetups but not necessarily to set an example for newbies (though I do see where you're coming from); I just find simpler coords a lot more comfortable.

>>8859001
this is hella cute anon

>>8858930
Good idea, thanks anon! I thought about talking to the Cracow and Brno girls but Vienna is my favorite city ever. I didn't know whether you guys had an active comm or just a lot of tourists like me taking photos there lol

>>8858236
We're a pretty laidback, drama-free group and we get a good turn-out for meets (I would say 8-10 people per meet on average?). A lot of us are in our 20's and have 9-5 jobs, so meets are almost always on the weekend. Philly has a shit ton of museums, restaurants, and shops in the area so there's always something to do. I really like the comm, and I've met some of my closest friends by joining it!

>>8859133
I say 3, skirts can come off casual and you want to dress to impress at your first meet.

>>8859133
1 is ita. 2 is a replica, and you'll get judged to fuck for it behind your back. 4 is hideous.
3 is your safest bet.

Ignore the other anons, you want to play it safe on your first meet. If you show up all OTT, they're going to think you're a stuck up cunt after attention.

>>8860337
There's a difference between too casual and nice but not OTT

>>8859133
Wear #3
Coord #1 belongs in the trash...
#4, please use common sense and stay away from ugly mini hats.

>>8859133
I'm sorry but all your legwear is cheap and trashy. 2 and 3 are from Bodyline and will cheapen the look of your coord whereas 1 and 4 are probably from Leg Avenue.

Also are you seriously considering wearing a bunny ear hoodie for 4? That screams "ita".

>>8860486
1 and 4 are the only terrible legwear. Bodyline's lace top otks are honestly fine. The lace isn't the best but it's more apparent in photos especially when the lace is spread out on the background.

>>8860337
I wouldnt say that OOT will make yo look stuck up. Its more about the time and place. If it is a casual meet, be casual. If it is something that is more fancy, high tea or something bigger, go more out there.

>>8859133
3 is the 'least awful' but I think it still needs a proper blouse never at t-shirt and it's also too dressy for a cutsew really. The rest have major flaws, you need some serious coording/buying help if this is the best selection you can pull from your closet. What about shoes, jewelry, bag, hairstyle/wig?

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My comm's Facebook page is such a mess. These are the two latest posts on it, neither of which are lolita related

>>8860981
The top post is Japan and personal announcement related. This will give notice to plan a farewell party for her. Plus lolitas will ask about questions concerning brand how she will acquire it during her station.

The bottom post is irrelevant to the group.

>>8859133
#3 with the blouse from #2
A t-shirt? Really?

>>8860996
>next year
>omigosh!
>implying bitch will be allowed to go/have enough free time to go where there is brand

>>8861020
Yeah I agree that it's irrelevant. Which is why I posted it. I think she should of just left that on her personal Facebook and maybe said something closer to her deployment date like "Won't be around for a while, sorry"

>>8858236
Come join the Facebook page. Our is super active and very chill. We do a lot if things from museums to restaurants to skating. A lot if regulars that are super nice (and well dressed). There is also the Harrisburg comm and lancaster but they dont really do as much

>>8859111
I wish we could. We only have like 2 and no one likes them

>>8844414
does Denver, Co have a lolita com?

>>8859111
Depends on why they are ita. If it's just people don't have exposure to good coords in person you have to set an example. If it's because people are poorfag it will be damn near impossible unless their financial position or priorities change.

>>8861905
This is asked in every thread. It's the Colorado Gothic and Lolita Society Members page on fb. Almost everything is in Denver since it's the biggest/ most centerally-located city.

>>8860564
I've owned the same Bodyline socks and they're not that great.

>>8861020
They have more free time than you think. Depending on where you are stationed of coarse.

>>8859111
We managed to de-Ita ours. It wasn't even that difficult really. The better dressed girls just kept posting photos of their outfits and turning up looking amazing. Whenever a newbie kept posting dumb shit a few girls firmly but fairly directed them. The newbies shaped up quick to be better or shipped out because they didn't want to.

We have had a bunch of new people join who have no clue, so now we start the process again. It's exhausting but part of the circle of life of a Lolita comm.

>>8861911
What about itas that are just apathetic about it all. So many girls in my comm have one kinda shitty coord for wearing to cons and never try and get better.

>>8863090
Did the well dressed girls get together and decide to try and de-ita your comm or did one of you start and get the ball rolling? How long did it take?

>>8863144
One girl made some diplomatic replies to the Ita posts and the other members backed her up. Then others also started making gentle but firm suggestions on how to improve outfits or when members were posting bad fashion choices. It sort of turned into a hive mind of Borglitas for a month or two and the members either learnt from the suggestions or went away. I guess it's all in the delivery and we're lucky to have some very diplomatic well dressed girls who aren't into mocking new people to drive them away.

>>8847305
Most UK comms do meets at museums and art galleries, since they're nearly all free here. But they're not that frequent because since they're free, most members have visited before or the comm has already had an event there a couple of years ago.

>>8849213
Yes, Tea Party Club on Facebook.

>>8859291
I travel alone to meets via public transport so I stay away from OTT and play it safe to prevent people bitching about me (I have some OTT outfits but they just don't get worn). It's not worth the hassle for an average meet.

I heard a tale that there was a comm in Virginia (Hampton area I think?) that hold newbie tea parties but are unwelcoming and ita. I'm taking it with a pinch of salt which is why I want to ask if it's true. My knowledge of the area isn't great, but I've visited once or twice and might be spending a week or two in the next few months, so it'd be nice to have a comm to meet up with if anything happened to be on in that time.

>>8865608
>pinch of salt
Grain of salt. A pinch is enough to fully season the gossip.

>>8866232
I shouldn't type up things after proof-reading recipes!

>>8866232
I was going to say I thought pinch was correct and grain was wrong, but I looked it up and it turns out its just a US-UK difference.

>>8866684
I've been to the UK, and they don't even salt their food.

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>tfw you're always the ugliest one in the group pics

just kill me now, senpai

>>8867167
If it helps, there's a girl in my comm who has looked perfectly cute IRL at all recent meets but is seriously ugly in the photos. Maybe you're just clinically unphotogenic.

>>8867167
This is one reason I started wearing make-up. It helps make you very photogenic by evening your skin tone, and making your features pop. Even if I have very nice skin that day, without make-up I look like a blotchy ghoul.

My comm wants to host a non-lolita-wearing meet to welcome newbies that lurk on the facebook page but don't own any lolita clothes yet

>What even is the point lol

>>8868930
Why even allow people who don't wear lolita yet to join?
My comm thankfully has an application where you need to submit a worn coord, that sounds like a pain.

>>8868930

Why don't they host a meet and say lolita is optional, but it'll be a meet to help people online shop and build a coord. Like, bring your computer or tablet and show us what you're looking at and we'll help.

I really wish my comm did a big sister/little sister thing for lolita to help new members.

>>8868930
We allow this for swap meets so newbies can buy their first pieces.

>>8863809
Thank you!

>>8868977
Yeah, swap meets in my comm have optional lolita wear since people generally try things on. Otherwise, "newbie" meets still require lolita to be worn to some degree.

>>8857440
Aw she sounds so sweet...a cute little old lady wanting to wear cute poofy dresses.
That's kind of a dick move anon and your font is absolutely terrible.

>>8868930
I'm in the same comm, definitely not going.

>>8868977
A swap meet would be a great idea for this, the idea for the "newbie meet" currently is to hold it at an art museum because it doesn't charge admission. Which makes it seem formal and stuffy to me, a nice museum is a place where you're supposed to be quiet and respectful, not a social and welcoming outing.

>>8859133
3 IF YOU CAN GET A PROPER BLOUSE.

Don't fucking wear a tee shirt with lolita jfc.

>>8869039
That sounds awful...

>>8859133
3 but with a blouse, a t-shirt is tacky as fuck.

>>8867167
know that feel bro

>>8859133
3 with the blouse from 2 without the gold bow. If you can't take the bow off, RIP.

>>8859133
What dress is three? What brand? Looks like something from Taobao. It's hella cute.

>>8869922
Chess Story

>>8847202
>Missouri
>not knowing about Paradiso despite being cross posted to every Midwest
fb.com/groups/167006113426866/
fb.com/groups/SWMOLolitas/

Comm spreadsheet
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1evXegSoFbfEXn8o0joeA-KFvolNKPKllgvaYqNgvOiw/edit?usp=docslist_api

>>8865608
You mean Hampton Roads, or more around DC?

>>8867628
I know that feeling. Even if I'm taking pictures of myself, I can barely look decent in the photos. If somebody else takes pictures of me, it's just a lost cause. I've learned to just untag and move on,

>>8847184
Yes

>>8844450
LA comm is really sweet and nice. no drama really.

>>8871086
>they have no drama because they rarely have meets
Seriously, for an area this large you'd think there would be more activity. The San Diego lolitas put us to shame with the frequency of their meets.

>>8860981
Jesus why are you so salty all the time?

So I took you gulls' advice and tried to start my own comm in my hometown. I currently belong to a few bigger comms, but they are really far from me and I'm barely able to make the meets. Especially because I work on weekends. I'm just looking for something for like, during the week on short notice or when I don't feel like driving. Plus, a great way to meet lolitas in my area, right?

I made a FB page for it, just to gauge interest and see if people would join. Oh, people joined. A bunch of normies looking to get into the fashion and a couple of itas. The one ita really wants me to start hosting some meets to get others interested. What do I do here? I feel really bad being so judgemental but I don't want to hang out with a bunch of itas and normies that know nothing about the fashion. I don't want people seeing us to misunderstand lolita. I talked to my boyfriend about it and he said, "Just be their queen, or maybe like a lolita mom to them."

Has anyone been a lolita mom to a comm full of normies and itas? Is this really necessary? Should I even do this or care?

What am I doing? What hath God wrought?

>>8873505
If you cant handle people who are itas or normies joining, dont make a comm. I highly doubt you could be their mom without it being a trainwreck, but get over yourself and hang out with them. Show them how to improve but stop being so high and mighty.

>>8873505
Should have made a rule that only lolitas can join, anon.

May be with this lot a fairly casual meet watching Kamikaze Girls might educate them a bit? I say a bit because in between about five or so iconic outfits (some of which have no blouse and no petti), Momoko mostly just wears ugly floral nightdresses.

>>8873505
I would try it out. I'd host a meet or two and try to guide them all in a good direction so maybe they'll improve! Aaand if its been a long time and they haven't improved at all I'd probably just give up on it or something.
Also on another note did your town just have no comm? Mine has a comm but it only has like ten members and I applied to join months ago and got no response so I guess it's dead. I've been thinking about starting my own comm since it seems to be dead but I dunno if people would join it or not. Do you think it would be worth a shot?

>>8863144
If they're "apathetic" and actually only have one coord, I wouldnt even consider them lolitas, they're just casual participants who need people to hang out with. It goes back to priorities, lolita is clearly not one of them. Sorry to hear that.

>>8873509
I guess I'm just more confused as to why the normies joined? There's really not much on their pages to indicate they are really interested in lolita. I just don't really know what I'm doing I guess, I didn't really think this through too well.

>>8873510
Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm going to scrap the page and make a closed group. If people would like to join, I'd like at least an explaination as to why they like lolita/would like to get into it if they don't have an outfit to show. I'm getting nervous people could just join because they are creeps, too.

>>8873513
My town had no comm. In your case, I would definitely try to set something up. There's people in your town that at least used to be into the fashion, so they may want to come back or at least give some good advice.

>>8870644
Hampton roads would probably be it

>>8873505
I would probably start by making some discussions on the comm page, like 'introduce yourself/tell us what style you like/do you have any pieces yet or what are you looking at buying' etc. so everyone isn't complete strangers at the meet and have things to talk about. Also start small, so if there's a cheap tea house or coffeehouse in your area start there.

>>8845835
>I'm kind of worried that they're going to be a bunch of itas.
Wow, that's pretty fucking rude when you haven't even met anyone or seen a picture. The central AL comm is full of well dressed girls.

>>8871875
It isn't easy hosting meet ups for a huge community. If you feel LA is lacking in meet ups, please do pitch in an idea or make a fun meet up for the whole community to attend.

>>8872026
because girls are shitting up the page with off topic content? i think my salt is justified

>>8878007
Hi Synny. Cadence knows it's you and The whole com is laughing at you and your shitty picture edits. Stop using her real name.

>>8878940
*grabs popcorn*

>>8878007
Your hate boner for Kato is getting real tiring. Find something productive to do with your time.

>>8844491
yes. you should. sounds like a shit freind. even re-gifting is bad, you don't sell gifts.

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>>8844426
a little late, but i made these one time and stuck them flat on rose-paper cards.
they looked really cute.

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>>8854302
>"thin-privilege"

are most meet-ups fun for the whole family or is it exclusive for lolitas? I know its fashion oriented but should i not bring kids/SO?

>>8879099
Your comm will probably be annoyed with you if you bring your kid and partner. Lolita meet ups tend to be for lolitas, after all.

>>8879099
Leave your SO/kids out of meets, don't be that asshole.

>>8879099
Fun for the whole family? Wtf are you talking about.

>>8879099
I beg you not to do this. These girls end up not even socializing with the comm its pathetic. There is nothing that irks me more than this, we already get weird stares, we don't need crying children around us as well. If you want to have family time don't do it with your comm, no one will like you

>>8878007
Are you trying to get this thread deleted? If you're going to complain about individuals, at least blur out their names.

>>8873505
Have wearing lolita as a requirement for regular meets. For beginners who don't yet have a full wardrobe, make swap meets an exception (people often pay for stuff with PayPal at swap meets too).

>>8879008
Are you stuck in your LiveJournal days?

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I have a love hate relationship with my comm. On one hand I've met some very lovely girls through my comm, and its also a very large comm.
But despite the fact that it has so many members, its pretty inactive. A lot of times there isn't even 1 meet a month. I tried organizing once but so many girls are so flakey, it was just annoying to have to deal with that nonsense.

I really wish I was a part of a small but close knit comm.

>>8879099
It's a fashion meetup. Do your kids and SO wear the fashion?

>>8879306
Unless you live close and whatever you and people in your comm do in every day life is completely stress free it aint gonna happen

>>8880829
Oh hey, looks like the shitposter is back.

>>8880907
>back
I never left, baby

>>8880829
You belong with us bby <3

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>find out there is a stunning abandoned castle like stone structure in the woods of a local park
>totally open to visitors and free
>ten minute walk from entrance down a flat and clearly marked paved path
>suggest a picnic there on comm's page
>"but anon the woods are dirty!"
>"I don't want to pay for parking"
>"what if we get harassed by people out there?"
>ok whatever
>check page next day
>the next meet will be held at the inner city mall for the third time this year

>>8882768
Fucking hell. Make the event anyway, and if no one shows up, have a picnic for one and enjoy the scenery without their histrionics.

>>8882985
>>8882768
Aw. I don't know where you live, but I'd love to go if I was nearby.

>>8882768
That sounds wonderful. I would totally attend.
Just make the event, I'm sure someone will show up.

>>8883052
Gulls, is this the abandoned housewife again? Just curious. What a shitty personality, I wonder if her husband and kids are the same, gross.

>>8883052
There's already a sissy on xtube who does that, sorry someone beat you to the punch.

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Is there anyway to get a hold of the chocolate rosette set without physically being at the party?

>>8857442
How is it a dick move? Names are blotted out and there's no pictures of her. She's not some random sweet old lady that joined the comm.

She goes on about "mean lolitas" and talks down everyone just because they're younger, showing how little she knows about the community and fashion, then gives a weird red lady poem for no reason. Maybe she needs to go there because she's wildly going on about things she knows nothing about.

>>8859001
they are so adorable!!

>>8879099
If you want to do something with your fashion maybe a con?

>>8883305
contact as SS...?

Is there a comm up in Pueblo, CO? I've got tons of family there so I visit often.

>>8857440
What a condescending woman. Hopefully she doesn't show up to anything. Sounds like a special snowflake.

>>8857440
I don't understand how some of you can read "sweet old lady" from this. Can you not grasp condescension and sarcasm without a '/s' tag? This post is just as catty as anything posted here.

Hey, I'm visiting Phoenix in a couple weeks and I want to know if it's worth it to try and meet up with the local comm? Is it active, is it fun?

>>8884758
Hi! I'm a Phoenix native. Yes, the comm is active, and yes, it's pretty fun, although like most places if you have even a slight price barrier (ie having to purchase tickets for something, or a mid-high end restaurant) you'll weed out a lot of the itas and weebs. When will you be around? If you join the comm (Arizona Lolitas on facebook) you might find that we have an event planned already for when you'll be visiting, or you can ask for help planning something yourself, up to you. Keep an eye on your message requests because the mods screen everyone who joins.

One last thing, it's already hot as balls in Phoenix right now, like 90F during the day dropping to 40 or 50F at night, so plan accordingly.

>>8884758
Sort of active but very welcoming, imo. There's quite a few active members. We don't have that many meets, though, so you'd probably have to suggest one.

>>8884758

>Is it active
Yes
>is it fun
No

AZ comm is still the most dramatic comm on this board

>>8884827
Jfc.
It's always the same 2 or 3 people on /cgl/ bitching about the AZ comm.
There's actually very little drama.
Sorry you got your feelsies hurt once.

Stop bringing the rest of the comm down with your vendetta bitching.

Anyone here from NRW Germany?

>>8884377
Still needing an answer to this

>>8884377
>>8886374
afaik, there's only the Colorado Gothic & Lolita Society and a Colorado Springs comm that I'm unfortunately not a part of. I don't think there is a comm specifically for Pueblo. There are lots of girls from CoSpgs, and sometimes they organize meetups closer to that area since most of CGLS's meetups are centered in the Denver Metro area.

Why don't you join the main comm and see if there's anyone around your area who would like to meetup with you during the times you are visiting here?

>>8886443
Thank your for answering! I was starting to think I'd never get a reply.
Yeah, that seems to be a problem in the CO area; not enough comms. I'll probably do some peeking around in the Colorado Springs comm. I've already taken looks into the Denver comm. maybe I'll see what I can do. I'll be down in the area sometime next month. Grandfather recently passed and is having his funeral in Pueblo. Maybe I'll see about attending a meet while I'm in the area before I leave.

>>8886460
The Colorado Springs "Tea Society" is full of itas and fetishists, just so you know. I'm not sure if there are any decent lolitas in the bunch. I'd try the Lolita Fashion in Colorado Springs group instead.

>>8886575
Noted. Thanks

>>8885101
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1evXegSoFbfEXn8o0joeA-KFvolNKPKllgvaYqNgvOiw/edit#gid=1
help yourself

How can you take the next step to becoming friends with people in your comm outside of just the meets?

>>8889967
bring up an event or activity you would like to do that might be relevant to their interests on a smaller scale. an upcoming movie ("oh i want to see that, want to go together? frills not required") or whatnot.

Miami lolitas!
I'll be visiting for a few days later this week (Thurs-Sun), and I was wondering how the city is for jfash. Since it's going to be pretty hot (for me), I plan on just wearing light, otome-ish things during the day. Will I stand out really bad? What about more casual stuff like LizLisa?
Also, I'd appreciate any cute cafe/restaurant recommendations, too. So far our itinerary is basically just eating Cuban toast, hitting the beach, and going to see Diplo and Kaskade on Friday.

dafuq happened in NOLA?

>>8890779
Go to Laduree!

>>8890779
You will stick out a lot but Miami needs more weird, do yo thang