What are some useful things you can get certified in online in

>>1503291
if you work in industry or use chemicals at all then an OSHA HAZWOPER 40 Hour is pretty dang useful to your employer.

Getting your CDL is pretty easy. Pretty much any transport job is comfy. My first job was a box truck driver. Got to drive around all day, listen to music, sit on my phone while truck was being unloaded, etc. I then got my CDL and got into OTR. Wasn't for me so I quit and got a job as a yard jockey making $17/hour to move trailers around the lot when needed but otherwise fucked off. Take home almost $3K a month with overtime. I'm a high school dropout btw so this is dreamland for me.

>>1503291
The Comp TIA exams, MSCEs, and similar certifications are stupidly easy and are pretty versatile. I got the A+ cert after studying for one day - not exaggerating. With that said, the harder, the better - the A+ is a joke, the MSCE/Cisco certs are better,

There are a lot of Coursera courses and their ilk, should you want to go that direction. I don't find them very impressive.

Personal trainer certifications are also decent - I have the CSCS, but it expired on me because I refused to do continuing education credits. There are some that don't require CE, I think.

As another anon mentioned here, >>1503299, getting a CDL isn't a bad idea if you find yourself down for manual labor.

Stuff like the CISSP/PMP are well-respected in business, but if I recall they have some irritating pre-requisites.

Six Sigma isn't as well respected as it once was, and it's a stupid mire of expensive programs, but it's still maybe worth doing. Ditto with Lean/Agile/Scrum/whatever the fuck.

Bartender certs are a bit of a joke, don't bother.

I looked into massage therapy to impress girls, don't bother.

>>1503297
I'm still a senior in high school. I just have nothing on my resume other than the most rigorous classes offered and being top 10 in my class. I am going to a college nearby with a full ride but I want to make money as well during college. I want to qualify myself for a job that isn't some shitty fast food/grocery store job paying minimum wage after I get out of high school, but I have no clue what these jobs could be.

>>1503307
Are there some specific software certifications I can get that are useful for getting a job?
I've looked at a list of just Microsoft certifications and it's an extensive list with tests that require a physical test location, but I'm okay with that.

I'm planning on getting certified in as many things as I can just to pad my resume when I need to with related certifications, but I don't want to waste time on useless certs either (such as the truck driver certs, for obvious reasons).

>>1503440
Also, do I lie on my resume about having a shitty minimum wage job, or is the risk of them checking not worth the gain?

>>1503440
CCNA
then CCNA Security

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>>1503307
>I looked into massage therapy to impress girls

>>1503469
Oh come on like that is so nonsensical, learn how to rub down a lady she might give you some special attention herself, it makes perfect sense to me but shrug.

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>>1503500
If you're already allowed to massage her, she already likes you. Some of the people on here are hilarious

>>1503469
In my defense, I was 18 and desperate

>>1503440
It depends on the job. Most good certifications in tech I'm aware of require real tests and real test locations, so it's good you're not explicitly against that.

From what I know: an A+ degree or similar will probably get your foot in the door in most low-level IT jobs. MCSE/Cisco certs tend to be associated with the better/less support-desk-y IT jobs. CISSP type stuff is the gold standard for many companies, but it requires work experience in specified fields.

Tom's has a decent breakdown:
http://www.tomsitpro.com/tags/certification/

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>>1504363
>allowed to massage her
>allowed

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>>1504407
Do you massage random women on the street?