Good day /bant/. I'm back to cure your diseases. Now tell

I play fallout 3

>>1460167
Do you use mods?

what happens when someone gets two + in their ID?

i play fallout new vegas

>>1460173
mods are for faggots

i have an anal disease that can be cured only by semen

>>1460176
This is a sign of The Gay. Stay away from them and contact me and I shall administer the cure.

I think I caught HTML

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>>1460188
>>1460193
You both have The Gay. You must remove your phallic members with a hot iron

>>1460205
This is new to me. But it is surely a sign of The Gay

>>1460162
The majority of games I play are either puzzles, team based, or a JRPG, how bad is it?

I have erectile dysfunction

>>1460162
I'm gay

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doctor i just can't get quads anymore. what happened?

>>1460244
You are not infected with The Gay. Be safe friend

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>>1460282
>>1460253
You have The Gay. Remove your phallic members and have your anuses burnt shut

>>1460303
Did your greencard expire, infidel?

>>1460317
doctor i am a native

>>1460304
there is one more thing I may need to say to be assured on my state, would... mostly playing support classes be a symptom of the gay?

I hate everything

>>1460162
I have the urge to pee in a gurls butt to make baby

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Neetdoom acne overweight and self loathing

>>1460330
Then i'm sorry, you have The Gay

>>1460162
ARE YOU Potter from drugs forum?

>>1460345
Good God man, you should have told me sooner. You are a clear victim of The Gay

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>>1460597
No. I am the Plague Doctor of /bant/

>>1460162
help me plague doctor sama, I've been sucking dicks recently, am I sick?

doctor, my dog has a tree growing out of its ass

>>1460649
Refer to >>1460310

>>1460676
thanks doc, I'll be doing that now

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>>1460162

Symptoms
>constantly irritated when reminded of world war 1
>constantly angry when reminded about (((them)))
>no sense of humor leading to being bullied by the eternal anglo

Can you help me, Herr Pestdoktor?
>pic related is me having all these symptoms simultaneously

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>>1460713
You are not ill. Society is. (((((They))))) are the main reason The Gay has begun infecting our people

>>1460587
doctor what are the symptoms the gay? and how do i cure it?

my dog still has a tree coming out of its ass

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>>1460782

Thank you Pestdoktor! I now feel better about these symptoms and will use them for something positive

I was carrying some fucking crates and I had to carry them in a really small space so I carried them like Quasimodo. Now my lower back hurts every time I stand up. I'm 18 years old. Please help

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>>1461130

I might help Herrn Pestdoktor hier:
When a Baum is coming out of your dogs Arsch it means he was infected by the (((Ewiger-Merchant-Virus))).
In order to heal him you must let him watch other dogs that are not affected kill a (((Hirsch)))
>pic related

But i'm no expert, so better ask the Pestdoktor for a second opinion

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>>1461206

Better wait for the Pestdoktor for a second opinion but i suggest you go have a walk in Karelia and then take a proper finnish sauna in the karelian woods
>pic related: color photograph from when the Waffen SS and Wehrmacht fought side by side with the Finns in the Karelian forests - Sauna Time

>>1461109
Symptoms include
-cock in the arse
-any skin color not white
-faggotry
-cocks in the mouth
-addiction to semen
-thinking women are more than property
-not wanting a new holy crusade
-cocks in the cock
-addiction to spherical objects, usually in pairs
-being a nigger

These are the most prevalent symptoms but mant others are included. The cure is to burn your anus shut and remove your phallic member

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>>1461280

>>1461206
>>1461280
This. And for a much cheaper option for the peasants, remov3 your lower spine with a hacksaw

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>>1461292

I actually traveled to the karelian forests (work-related) a couple of times, i work in battlefield archeology.
However no Finn with us ever offered me one of your legendary saunas, what do i have to do to get one?
>pic related: Shit you find in the karelian forests

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>>1461292
>>1461436

Also stuff like this
>pic related
Luckily i learned all about de-activating WW2 explosives while i served in the german military

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>>1460162
>anus crying
>sweet sweat
>talking backwards
>refer to myself as thy
>dog keeps cooking that nefarious oyster sauce
>god wont shut up
I really, REALLY need him to shut the fuck up so i can keep dig-diggin and flip-flippin doc.
Send your squad asap.

I live in a box and suck off people's dogs for booze money. Am I infected?

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>>1461495
Kill and eat the dog. It has been hexed with The Gay and it is infecting your humors

>>1461498
Have you sucked off a priest?

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>>1461498

Ja du bist infiziert mit entarteter Kunst!
>pic related

>>1461581
I sucked off his dog.

>>1460162
Help.
I have a weird obsession with money. It's not like a fetish or something. It's like when I hear coins being dropped I have an instant reaction to pick it up and run away.

>>1461587
His dog should be holy though so you're probably alright

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>>1461595

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>>1461595
Whats your skin color? If dark you're a nigger and infected with the worst kind of The Gay, Gay AIDS also known as GAIDS. If you're skin is light then you must be part jewish and have a lesser form of The Gay

>>1461498
I'm pretty sure this is the guy that shoved that tree up my dogs ass

>>1461552
T-t-thanks doc.
Dog's eaten.
God's shut.
Anus's smilin.
You do are a mira.oculous man.

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>>1461632
Im Asian
How can I cure it???

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>>1461595

To quote Hjalmar Schacht (Financial minister for the 3rd Reich)
>"Jew the jew by acting like a jew"
He never said that but his actions doing exactly this worked so well, he was prosecuted at the Nuremberg Trials
>pic related
>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hjalmar_Schacht
Read some of his work to make your strange fetish into something positive

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>>1461690
Bitch didn't pay for the BJ.

>>1461698
Stop squinting. And stop eating all that fucking rice. Rice spreads The Gay you know

>>1461710
it wasn't a very good one, my dog was not satisfied

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There are hundreds of thoughts rushing around my head and they've given me countless headaches from worrying so much, I don't know what else to do other than to deal with them or distract myself with whatever.

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>>1461748
I live in a box and have a beard. What did you expect, a professional dog blowjob?

>>1461775
you know what, I actually kinda did expect it to be better, I know way better techniques that you weren't implementing and it really just put me off on the whole thing. unless you can give my dog a better deal next time, I think I'll go to the guy around the corner, he's got a big cardboard box, like one a fridge comes in. Has a waiting room, too.

i have a disease where i have an uncontrollable urge toDon't post "can this become a meme" memes happen on accident do you think Rick Astley sang Never Gonna Give You Up because he knew it would become a meme? No! Stop trying to make stupid shit in to a meme like Alzheimer's Guy or ravioli Boy.

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>>1461814
>getting your dog a blowjob from that smelly Chinese dude

>>1460162
What ya got for a hangover doc?

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>>1461834
Don't post "can this become a meme" memes happen on accident do you think Rick Astley sang Never Gonna Give You Up because he knew it would become a meme? No! Stop trying to make stupid shit in to a meme like Alzheimer's Guy or ravioli Boy.

>>1461857
Hangovers are caused by women imbalancing your humors. Avoid contact before and after drinking

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>>1460162
Doctor help.
>be me with asthma
>been working around chemical agents as of recently
>been kinda suffocating
>dizzy spells
>recently ive been coughing up blood

Be honest with me doc will i live to purge the middle east?

>>1462264
Sadly you might not have long. But if you suicide bomb Mecca i'm sure God will be pleased by such an act for the Holy Land

>>1461288
Doctor none of that applies to me. Are you sure I have the Gay?

>>1460162
When I shit it's usually 50-75% blood and a weird piece of finger-like, sometimes partially rotten, flesh falls out half way inside the faecies or after. It usually hurts more when it comes out after.

>>1461741
I also noticed that a guy might be infecting me and my friends with The Gay. What should be done with him??

>>1460162
I stayed in bed all day after a workout. Will I be fine?

>>1460162
I don't like traps amymore

Doc, you gotta help me out. You see, I'm addicted to porn and I want to quit. What can I do to speed up the recovery process of my brain from not watching porn?

>>1463090
Is it gay porn??
Just wandering.

>>1463240
Just girls, and some occasional pov.

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IDENTIFY YOURSELF PLAGUE DOCTOR. Do you work in the name of Our Lord Jesus Christ?
Are you an impostor?

>>1460162

i hae puss coming from my ankles but my ankles don't have holes anywhere and i don't have ankles

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>>1464751
I am the Plague Doctor. Do not question me or my morality. I will cure this board of The Gay